Chapter 11
ELEVEN
BLADE
The bike is the only place the world ever shuts up. The engine is loud, yeah, but the rest of the noise fades. The thoughts I don’t want. The things I want and pretend I can’t have. Out here, I actually feel like myself.
Tonight though? She’s pressed tight to my back, arms wrapped around me, chin tucked against my shoulder, and I swear I can feel every breath she takes like it’s happening inside my own chest. The ride feels different with her. Everything feels different.
I take the long way out of town, cutting up toward the ridge where the land drops into miles of forest and sky. The higher we climb, the cooler the air tastes, wind whipping around us like it’s trying to get our attention. The stars shine bright tonight, no streetlights trying to drown them out.
When I pull off at the overlook, gravel crunching under the tires, she leans just a little closer, like she’s not ready to let me go. I kill the engine and silence floods the space between us, thick with everything neither of us has said.
She slides off first, tugging her helmet free and tossing her hair back like she knows exactly what it does to me. I take my time, watching her take in the view. The whole damn valley sprawls below us, moonlight catching the trees and making the town look small enough to pocket.
“This place is beautiful,” she says softly.
I walk up behind her, arms slipping around her waist. She fits against me without trying. Her fingers find mine like they belong there.
“It helps me think,” I say near her ear. “Or forget. Depends on the night.”
She melts into me and I swear my pulse rewrites itself around her. I dip my head, lips brushing the warm skin beneath her ear before my brain can stop me. She shivers. I swear I could get religious about that reaction.
“Bri.” My voice slips lower, heavier. “There’s something you don’t know. Something that might change your mind about being here with me.”
She tenses slightly, grip tightening around my hands. “Tell me.”
My throat locks for a second. Cold air, hot truth. Not a great mix.
“I’m not the guy who just had a shitty childhood,” I say quietly. “Bad things don’t just happen around me. They happen because of me.”
She starts to turn, but I hold her still for another second. Needing a tiny bit more darkness to get the words out.
“There was a woman,” I say, steady but wrecked. “Tessa.”
Bri doesn’t speak. She just listens like she knows this is a wound I never let see daylight.
“We were seeing each other,” I continue. “Not some grand love story. We were just two messed up people who found something good between all the chaos. She made me laugh when nothing felt funny. She gave me hell when I needed it.” My throat tightens. “She cared about me.”
I drag in a harsh breath.
“Ten years ago, things with a rival crew were heating up. There were threats. Intel that shit was about to go sideways. Mason told us to lock the place down and get our people inside the compound.”
I stare straight ahead, but I’m not seeing the view anymore. I’m seeing flames.
“I told her to go home. Told her to lock her doors and stay inside. She wanted to stay with me. I pushed her away instead.”
The guilt that never left my chest squeezes tight.
“She walked off pissed, got in her car, pulled up to the gate.” My voice drops to almost nothing. “That’s when the bomb went off.”
Bri gasps, silent and sharp.
“One second she was there,” I say. “The next there was fire. Metal. Pieces of the car flying everywhere. I ran toward her like I could do something, like I could pull her out of hell with my bare hands.” I swallow hard. “Rev dragged me back before the gas tank blew.”
I scrub a hand over my face once, like I can erase the memory.
“I heard her scream my name before the flames took everything else.” My voice shakes, just a little. “And then nothing.”
The silence after that confession feels like someone waiting for a verdict.
She starts to turn toward me but I hold her where she is, needing the darkness to hide my face while I say it.
The wind picks up, cold against the heat climbing in my chest. “I wasn’t quick enough.
I wasn’t smart enough. And she paid for it.
” I finally let her face me. “I don’t get to want things like you.
I don’t get a future. I get blood and guilt and nightmares that don’t stop. ”
She lifts a hand, fingertips brushing my jaw like she can fix something that snapped a long time ago. “Blade,” she whispers.
“I live in a world that will ruin you without trying,” I say, sharp with truth that tastes like poison. “You’re sunlight and I’m the damn storm. You deserve someone who makes you feel safe, not someone who brings danger right to your door.”
Her eyes flash. Angry. Offended that I’d even try to push her away with that logic. “You think I don’t know who you are?” she asks, stepping closer. “You think I don’t see you? The good and the broken and the parts you try so hard to bury? I still want you.”
My hands flex on her hips. “You should be running.”
“I should be,” she agrees. “But I’m not. And I’m not going to.”
She tilts her head up, fearless. Brave in a way that makes me want to wrap her in steel and never let the world touch her.
“I’m not that girl,” she says. “I don’t break easily.
If your world is dark, then I’ll learn the dark.
If you’re haunted, I’ll stand right beside whatever ghosts try you. You don’t scare me.”
There’s a pressure in my chest that feels like the first breath after drowning. She leans in, lips hovering close enough to rewrite every rule I’ve lived by. “So you can keep pretending this is a bad idea,” she whispers, “or you can be honest and kiss me like you want to.”
And I am done pretending. “I want you,” I say, voice rough like gravel. “More than I should. More than I can stand.”
Her lips part, soft and sure, and I kiss her like she is the only thing keeping me alive.
I kiss her like I’m starving. She kisses me like she’s been waiting on this moment forever. Her hands dive into my hair. My grip slides to her hips, pulling her flush with me, and she gasps against my mouth. The sound nearly puts me on my knees.
She breaks away only long enough to whisper, “Take me home.”
That sentence flips the last switch in me. I swing a leg over my bike and look back at her, pulse wrecked.
“Get on,” I rasp.
She climbs on without a flicker of doubt.
Her thighs bracket mine, tight and sure.
Her hands slide around my waist like she owns the right to touch me.
I fire up the engine and the rumble shoots straight up my spine, all adrenaline and bad decisions.
She settles against my back like she was built to ride with me, a certainty I’ve never deserved but refuse to turn down.
We tear through the night, fast enough the streetlights smear into streaks of gold and shadow. My pulse syncs with hers, every breath she exhales hitting the back of my neck like sparks off flint. No overthinking. No excuses. I take the fastest line home.
The second we roll into my driveway, the world narrows to just us. I kill the engine and pull her helmet off slow, fingers trailing her jaw. She tries to hide the smile threatening to take over her face. She fails.
She steps off the bike and I’m already there, crowding into her space, voice rough with everything I’m trying to hold back.
“You sure?” I ask. “Because you walk through that door with me, and I’m not letting you go.”
Her hands curl into the front of my cut and she drags me down until our mouths share the same breath.
“Blade,” she whispers. “I’m sure.”
That’s the last permission I’ll ever need.
I back her inside, kick the door shut, and press her against it, my chest heaving like I ran the whole way home.
“You think this is just tonight?” I ask, brushing my thumb across her cheekbone.
She shakes her head, breath catching. “I think it’s whatever we want.”
“No,” I say, honesty ripping straight through me. “You kiss me like you mean it. You get on the back of my bike like you belong there.” My hand slides up, fingers curling around the side of her neck. “I’m not letting you walk away. Not tomorrow. Not ever.”
Her pulse jumps hard against my palm. “Good.”
That word… it detonates something feral inside me.
“You’re mine, Bri.”
Her grin turns wicked, eyes dark with want. “Then kiss me again.”
So I do. Hard. Hungry. Certain. I lift her like she weighs nothing. Her legs wrap around me in one smooth move that steals my good sense. She whispers my name against my jaw and it feels like destiny finally calling my bluff.
I carry her through the threshold of my room, her lips marking a path along my neck that tests my ability to stay upright. I set her down but stay right up against her. No space. No doubt.
I put my cut on the dresser. Then I pull my shirt from my back up and over my head. My shirt hits the floor. Her eyes track every inch of me. Every line of ink, scar, and muscle.
She runs her hands up my chest then pulls me into another kiss. I walk her backward until the bed catches her legs and she falls back with a soft sound that I feel everywhere.
My lips trail along her neck, slow enough that every tiny shiver tells me exactly how bad she needs this. My hand cups her big tits and I squeeze, loving the way her moan vibrates against my mouth. God, the sounds she gives me? I’m obsessed.
I grab her shirt and rip it open like I’ve been thinking about it all damn night. Her chest rises and falls, breathing all uneven, her tits practically spilling out of that bra. I kiss my way down, rubbing and squeezing like she’s my favorite thing to touch. Because she is. I fucking love her tits.
“You pushed,” I murmur against her warm skin. “You teased.”
My hand slides inside her bra and I yank the lace down so she’s bared to me, perfect and mine.
“Now you pay for it.”