Chapter 6
Chapter Six
C ollins was losing her mind. She had to be.
An hour ago, she was so angry with this man that she wanted to throat punch him. Toss words that hit like stones or pierced like a knife. She wanted to make him feel as bad as she’d felt when he’d rejected her in that barn.
And now he was kissing her like he was a man on fire. Like he was dying of thirst, and she was what he needed to survive. Like he hadn’t eaten for days and she was his sustenance. She could go on and on, because Good Lord, the man could kiss.
She thought she’d had the best of it in Nashville, but now she knew she was wrong. That was an appetizer. Never in her life had she been so thoroughly tasted. And it included that one time in Paris, and the chef who liked to dribble chocolate, then lick it up. This was next level. Romance book worthy. A toe-curling kind of thing, that had her panting for more before he’d barely begun.
“Damn, but you taste good.” Benton nuzzled her neck, and she sighed, leaning back so he had full access to her neck and chin and mouth and anything else he wanted. She threaded her hands in his hair and held him close, heart pounding a mile a minute, blood liquid fire.
His hands were up and down her body, fingers pressing here, palms caressing there. And the whole time, his mouth ravaged her. Could a girl die of heat and desire? Could she melt into a puddle of mush and still survive?
“Jesus, Benton,” she breathed, breath caught.
“There’s no room for him,” he growled, trailing his mouth along her jawline.
“Get a room!”
The words came from the dark, along with a good amount of laughter, and she felt Benton’s muscles bunch beneath her hands. He moved his body to shield her from prying eyes, something she’d think on later. Chest heaving and breaths coming fast, the two of them came up for air. Slowly, she lifted her head and met his hooded gaze directly.
It was visceral. The way her body and mind reacted to this man. Is this what it meant to imprint on someone? Was he the lone wolf she’d never forget?
“I don’t want this,” he said, his words slow and measured despite the rapidly beating heart at her fingertips.
In another time and place, those words would hurt. But not tonight. “I don’t think that matters because you feel this thing too,” she said, pressing forward for one more kiss. He didn’t resist, and she swept her mouth across his. Her body ached in places that needed some love and care, but she’d deal with that later. Right now, she had to make a point.
Collins kissed him lightly, then slowly pulled back, ignoring the throb between her legs and the handsome man who stood between them. Her breast was exposed, and she bit her tongue when he gently pulled her top back into place, though his fingers grazed the nipple. Could have been accidental, but she was guessing it was deliberate.
She watched him for a few moments until she felt that she could talk without sounding like an idiot. “I didn’t come all this way to turn tail and run, Benton. I came to Big Bend because I can’t stop thinking about the night we shared in Nashville.”
“It wasn’t a night,” he replied, voice coated in whiskey. “It was straight up sex, and it was supposed to be anonymous.”
“That’s very true.” She took a beat and slowly exhaled because she had to get this right. “If you can tell me that you haven’t thought of me since that night, I’ll leave. If you can swear that this kiss we just shared didn’t rock your entire world, I’ll leave. If you can say that you’re not lonely, that you’re not searching for that one thing to fill this hole inside you.” She pressed her hands against his chest. “The same hole I have, then I’ll hop on a plane tomorrow and take the job in Bali my agent is pushing for.” He swore, and the blood in her veins was so loud, she heard nothing else.
Benton glanced away and rubbed at the hair on his jaw. But he stayed silent. He didn’t deny her questions. Didn’t offer up anything else either.
“That’s what I thought,” she replied softly. She took another step and sucked in some fresh air, then glanced over her shoulder. “I’m sticking around Big Bend.”
“It’s a free country.”
“Yes. It is.” She put one foot on the bottom step. “When you go home tonight and the darkness covers you whole, it’s my face you’ll see. My lips you’ll dream of. And when I go back to Duffer’s Place and crawl into my bed, naked, it’s your hands I’ll feel on my body. This thing between us won’t go away. I know that now.”
“You don’t know shit,” he said, voice rough. “You’re barely out of high school.”
She smiled. “You’re pulling at straws now. And for the record, I got my high school diploma when I was sixteen. I’m not just a pretty face. I’ve seen and done more than most women ten years older than me, so don’t talk to me like I’m a child. I’m a grown woman, and you want me. Lucky for you, I feel the same way. That kind of connection doesn’t come along often in this life.” Something lit inside her, stoked by the devil on her shoulder. She smiled, a wicked sort of thing. “I’ll see you around, Benton.”
She walked up the steps and didn’t look back.
The bar was loud, and the energy was rowdy. The band had kicked into high gear, and she joined Jo behind the bar. She felt ragged. Like she’d just run a marathon.
“My God, I thought you left,” the bartender said, before tossing over three empty jugs. “Table four needs these. The domestic on tap.”
Head down, she got to work and though she glanced at the door now and again, Benton didn’t materialize. Probably for the best. He would have been a distraction, and she needed her wits about her. Slinging beer for a bunch of rowdy cowboys wasn’t for the faint of heart.
The evening flew by, and once the last patron was ushered out of the Sundowner, she sat down at the bar and took a swig from the glass of wine she’d poured herself. “Not bad,” she said to Jo, who sat across from her, a tumbler of whiskey in hand.
“Millie Sue keeps a few bottles of the good stuff for the out-of-towners.”
“Speaking of, I didn’t see them leave.”
Jo shrugged. “I think Vivian was tired, and she was the driver. Millie Sue said to thank you and to offer you a job.” Jo cracked a smile. “Kidding, of course, but man, I wish you were a local. You’re a natural.”
“Like I said, I grew up in a family that entertained a lot, and big crowds and loud people don’t scare me. Neither do drunk men.”
“Well, thanks for jumping in tonight. I’ll send your tips to wherever you’re staying tomorrow.”
“Duffer’s Place.”
“What?” Jo grabbed a rag and wiped down the bar top.
“I’m staying there for a while.”
Jo frowned. “I thought you’d be at Ivy’s.”
Collins didn’t reply to the question, instead, she had one of her own. “Are you serious about looking for help?”
“Dead serious.” She frowned. “Why?”
“I’m interested.”
“You don’t need the money, so why would you want to work in a bar?” Jo was confused.
“You’re right about that, so you can donate my wages and tips to the local food bank. But the thing is, I’ve decided to stay in Big Bend for a while. I’m not sure how long exactly, but I had fun tonight, and since you need the help I’m offering. It’s as simple as that.”
Jo’s frown deepened. She folded the cloth in her hand and placed it on the counter. “I’d need you Wednesday, Thursday, and Saturday nights.”
“I can make that work.”
Jo’s expression changed, and she reached for her whiskey. “Does this have something to do with Benton Bridgestone?”
Shit. Collins could deny it, but what was the point? “How’d you figure that out?”
Jo’s smile widened. “I saw him leave, and then you bolted like a bat out of hell. When you came back inside, you had a look about you.”
“A look.”
Jo nodded. “Like you’d just played tongue tag with one of the hottest men in Big Bend.”
Collins didn’t know what to say to that. She felt her cheeks burn and hot, glanced down.
“I bet he’s real good.”
Collins yanked up her head, and when she saw the sly smile on Jo’s face, she could only nod her head. “I’ve never been kissed like that before.”
“You guys know each other, I presume?”
“We met in Nashville a few months back and I…” There was no point in playing coy now. “I had the best night of my life with him. He’s the reason I came to Big Bend. I needed him to know how I felt, and I had to find out if he felt the same.”
“Does he?”
She touched her bottom lip and smiled. “Pretty sure he does.”
“He’s got a lot of baggage.” Jo’s face softened. “His ex is making waves.”
“Nora’s mom.”
Jo nodded. “I’m not from Big Bend, so I don’t know her well, but working in a bar, you hear things.”
“What kind of things?” Collins was curious. She didn’t know much about the situation.
“I don’t like to gossip, so all I’ll say is that if you’ve got your cap set on Benton, you need to be real careful. They have a lot of history, and her having a boyfriend doesn’t mean much. I think she’d drop him in a hot minute if Benton would take her back.”
Collins had never shied away from competition, but even she knew that as the mother of Benton’s child, this woman had an edge.
“And Michaela?”
Jo walked around the bar and stood a few inches from Collins. “Michaela Dawson grew up on a ranch outside of town and moved back a few months ago. She and her husband split, and she and her kids are home with her folks for the time being. She’s a nice girl, and she’s had a thing for Benton since high school. But I don’t think you have to worry about her.”
“Why is that?”
Collins thought of the way the woman had touched Bent, like she’d declared him her property or something.
“Because Benton would never kiss another woman if he had his eye on someone else. And honey, you were thoroughly kissed.”
“He thinks I’m too young for him.”
“Sounds cliche, but age is just a number. My grandma was twenty when she married my gramps, and he was forty-two. They had four kids and were happily married right up until the day he died. Never met a couple more in love and suited to each other.” Jo moved past Collins. “On that note, we can lock up. The cleaners come in the morning, and I’ll get the bar set up tomorrow.”
Collins followed Jo out to the parking lot. “I’ll see you Wednesday night.”
Jo held her gaze and then slowly nodded. “Okay. See you then.”
Collins drove back to Duffer’s Place. She washed off her makeup, brushed her teeth, and pulled on her favorite Sponge Bob pajamas. She climbed into bed and retrieved her phone, eyes on the messages waiting for a response. Kip was pissed so she’d deal with him in the morning. Her agent was annoyed, she’d deal with her in the morning. Her mom sent a reminder for the Lafferty Foundation Ball on the Saturday before Labor Day weekend. There were other group chats with a few work colleagues—models she’d done campaigns with and a photographer she loved.
All of it could wait.
She rolled over and grabbed a pillow, then closed her eyes. She was tired. Jeg lagged. And lonely. So. Fucking. Lonely.
Collins Lafferty was the highest-paid model in the world, and she shared her bed with no one. Even though she knew most folks would scoff at the notion, she was most definitely in love with a man who would fight her at every turn, and there was a high probability he’d break her heart. But the moments she’d spent with Benton were the most real moments she’d had in her life. She’d felt truly alive, and there was beauty in that.
If a broken heart was the risk she’d take to be with him, then so be it.