22. Dillan
22
DILLAN
D ays slip by, and Lizzie refuses to budge from my thoughts. Damn it, it’s like the day after our one night all over again. I’m fine, and then, boom , my entire world tilts. Frustration doesn’t even cut it. A stubborn part of me doesn’t want to erase her from my mind. Sure, our night together was beyond words, but it’s not just her physical allure or body’s grace that captivated me. The truth is, I enjoy her company, genuinely.
And now her laughter lingers in my thoughts like an unwelcome guest.
Talking and joking with her has always felt easy, real, and it still does, unlike anything else I’ve ever come across. Every word she utters, every sassy remark—it’s like a jolt to the system, a lightning bolt to the chest. Every glance she gives me sends shockwaves through my soul. With her, it’s like a bolt of lightning, striking at the core of your being. Lizzie has never been just another pretty face or a fleeting moment of fun—she’s a force of nature, pulling you into her swirling orbit with a gravity you can’t escape.
Fact is, somehow, she has touched my heart, left a mark on my soul, and I can’t shake off the damn impact she’s had on me. No matter what I do, I can’t get her out of my head, and it’s driving me crazy. She’s driving me crazy.
It gets to the point where I actually invite Gavin over for dinner so I can talk about it.
A first for me. But God damnit, I don’t know what else to do.
To his credit, he remains surprisingly calm and quiet until I finish my story. Only then does he react. “Wait, so, she’s one of your…patients?” he asks, his burger untouched on his plate.
“Not mine, my colleague’s,” I correct. “I ended up filling in since she went into labor early.”
“Let me get this straight. The chick you’ve been hung up on for months moved on with somebody else and had a kid? That fucking sucks. I’m sorry.”
“It is what it is. I mean, from what I gathered, she’s single again, but it’s not really the best time to try to reconnect, all things considered.”
“That’s fair. She did ghost you and then have another man’s baby. But the fact you’re still thinking about her after all that means you’ve got it bad.”
“Or I just fucking hate myself.” Spearing my fingers through my hair, I lean back in my seat.
“Yup.” Gavin nods.
I’ve always been able to have anything I wanted once I set my sights on it. Lizzie remains the one thing that seems to be constantly out of my reach. I’ve been out plenty of times over the past few months. Gotten laid, had fun times, even gone out with a few girls on several dates and enjoyed myself every time. But after just one freaking day, thoughts of Lizzie have returned with a vengeance. It’s damn distracting. And also means I’ve been lying to myself. Clearly, I haven’t moved on. I can’t get Lizzie out of my mind.
“Was her baby cute?”
“Damn cute.”
“Well, maybe it’s a sign ,” Gavin says, leaning back with a thoughtful expression.
“A sign of what?”
“I don’t know, that you two are meant to be in each other’s lives in some way.”
I give him a smirk. “That’s oddly romantic of you.”
“Hey, I’m a romantic guy.”
“Since when?” I snort.
“Deep down. Don’t tell anyone though. I’m all about low standards.”
I chuckle. “Well, if that’s the case, the universe definitely has a sense of humor.”
“Look, all I’m saying is, don’t shut the door on her just yet. You clearly are a loser who can’t move on and can’t stop thinking about how to get her under you again. It looks like you have strong feelings and, based on what you’ve told me, the fact she didn’t ignore you or shut you out means that there might still be feelings on her end. Maybe she didn’t call because shit got in the way. Or a million other reasons. But trust me, she’ll call you.”
“Why?” I ask.
“Well, you’re not the father,” he says, “but I bet she wants one for the kid.”
“She didn’t call me, remember? And she didn’t ask me for my number at the hospital either.”
“Why didn’t you ask for hers?”
“You were the one who told me I should move on from her, and now you’re telling me that meeting her is a sign and I need to call her? Which is it?” I regret the question as soon as it’s out of my mouth.
“Both!”
“Gavin.” I sigh, frustrated, raking my hand down my face.
“Okay. Then I changed my mind.” At first, Gavin’s grin widens, but then there’s a subtle shift in his expression. The corners of his mouth soften. “In all seriousness, Dillan. I’ve never seen you talk about a chick the way you talk about this one. I mean, she must have the best pussy ever, or I don’t know why you’re obsessed. There are other women out there, you know. But okay, clearly, you want to bust a nut in her. Besides, you went like, what, fifteen years without seeing each other, and now you’ve seen her twice in less than a year? That seems pretty significant.”
He hasn’t voiced anything I haven’t already been thinking. In my heart, I know Lizzie and I aren’t meant to never see or speak to each other again. She’s too special to me to let her go. However, there’s still the matter that I have no way to contact her without being creepy.
Sure, I can probably get her info from medical records in the clinic, but that’s stalker shit. Point is, if she wanted to see me again, she would have said something.
She didn’t.
Done.
And she just had a baby.
Obviously, she has a different agenda now.
Gavin claps me on the back. “You’ll figure something out. And hey, if you two really are meant to be, I’m sure you’ll get together again.”
H is words replay in my head for the next day or so. Things are finally starting to slow down at work, which gives me time to do some thinking.
I should speak openly to her, but I can’t go back and fix my previous mistake. The only thing I can do is think ahead and move forward. I have no social media, nor do I have any desire to. The one or two attempts I make to search for her profiles online come up with a list of too many Elizabeth Moores to weed through, so I give up.
I’m in between patients and have taken time to sit at my desk and update my patient list when Lizzie’s name comes up.
You know what, to hell with it , I think.
To hell with not being creepy, let’s be fucking creepy.
Let’s be Dr. Motherfucking Creep of the Century.
What’s her fucking number?
While Lizzie isn’t my patient, Daisy Anderson is one of my colleagues, and I have access to her patient list since I was the one to deliver Lizzie’s baby. Though my practice is private, the building is shared with a few other medical offices, including the one Daisy works in.
Before I have a chance to click on her contact information, a notice pops up, preventing me from continuing. I click on it, but there isn’t much to go on, other than that the billing department has tried to call Lizzie with no luck. My heart sinks, but I’m undeterred and curious as to why they’ve tried to contact her so many times.
I pick up my desk phone and call the billing department at the hospital.
“Billing, this is Sam,” the billing manager answers in her usual peppy tone.
“Hey, Sam, it’s me. I’m just looking at Elizabeth Moore’s account and noticed you guys have tried calling her but couldn’t reach anyone. What’s going on?”
“Let me look.” I hear her long nails dancing across the keyboard. “Ah, okay. Yeah, not sure what happened here. We got her payment before she left the hospital, but when we tried to run it, it wouldn’t go through. There’s no new phone number on file, but we’ve sent her an email. Though I’m not sure it’s active, and even if it is, I don’t imagine she’s checking her email after just having a baby.”
“Do you have an address on file?”
“Yes, we do. But the last few letters we sent came back as undeliverable. It looks like her address was entered into the computer system incorrectly…let me see. Yep. The street name is missing.” She sighs loudly. “I swear, the last software update has been a nightmare.”
“I’ll take care of it,” I tell Sam.
“Take care of what? Do you have a better number for her?”
“No,” I say. “I mean I’ll pay it.”
There’s silence.
I can only imagine what’s running through Sam’s mind.
“That’s very kind of you, sir,” she finally says, her tone warm.
I ignore the comment. “My card should be on file.”
“Sorry…just to make sure. Do you want to pay a portion of the balance or the entire amount?”
“Entire amount,” I confirm. “Just charge it.”
“Understood, Dr. Maxwell.”
I hang up the phone, mulling over what I’ve learned. Even if I can’t contact Lizzie or be with her, the least I can do is take care of her bill. She has a new baby. I don’t want her to have to worry about an outstanding stupid account balance. It will be a nice surprise when she learns the balance is all set.
I throw myself back into work.
S everal hours later, I step away from the computer to stretch my legs and rest my eyes. My stomach grumbles, and that’s when I realize how late in the day it is. My last appointment has canceled, so I decide to head out early and grab a late lunch.
Okay, don’t fucking judge me. I find myself at Amelio’s.
I know I won’t run into her; I’m not an idiot, but I still keep going because the food and drinks are good. They even have my favorite seat at the bar ready for me the second I walk through the door.
As I sip my whisky and ponder what to order, I hear a familiar voice across the room.
“I love this place!”
Looking up, I see Lizzie’s original blind date helping a young woman into their booth. I haven’t seen him here since that night. A small spark of hope blooms in my chest. The urge to see Lizzie again has me out of my seat before I even stop to think about what I’m doing.
I walk up to him. “Excuse me, hate to interrupt,” I turn to the woman, “but can I borrow him for a second?”
The woman with the curly reddish hair nods, tucking her napkin onto her lap. I notice an engagement ring on her finger. She seems happy and in love.
I pull the man off to the side. “It won’t take long, and then you can go back to your date. My name is Dillan,” I introduce myself, trying to maintain at least some semblance of politeness.
“Herbert,” the man replies after a moment’s hesitation. He’s even more confused than before, not that I blame him. “I’m sorry…” he sputters, “but I have no idea what’s going on?”
“Yeah. I know this is weird, but you were here months ago waiting for a blind date, right?”
He hesitates. “Yeah…”
“She stood you up.”
“Yeah, that was me. Wait…how did you know that?”
“Long story. You wouldn’t happen to have her contact info, would you? A new phone number? She’s an old friend of mine, and I’d really like to talk to her.”
A smile appears on his face, as if he’s just remembered something. “Actually, I ran into her accidentally not long ago, and she asked about you. You are Dr. Maxwell, I assume?”
“Yes!”
“And you two haven’t exchanged numbers?”
“Look, I know this sounds strange. But Lizzie and I were friends in high school, and I haven’t been able to reach her lately. And any information you can give me on her would be helpful.”
“I’m sorry…”
“I’ll pay for your lunch,” I offer.
He shrugs. “I mean I’m sorry I don’t know much. I never got her number.”
My heart sinks. “You never got her number?”
“Nope. But I do know where she lives. My mother’s best friend set the date up. She lives in the same building as Lizzie.”
With a grin, I pull out my phone. “What’s the address?”