NINE
Rose
T he walk back feels quicker. Kara passes the time by describing her marshmallow roasting techniques in great detail. Apparently, the trick to the perfect marshmallow is to avoid catching it on fire. Who knew?
When we get back to the house, I receive a personal demonstration before I roast one for myself. The fireplace is warm and cozy by the time we’ve each had our treat, and Nate sits back in his armchair. “Alright, Kara. Time for bed. Say goodnight to Rose. Go brush your teeth. I’ll be there in a minute to tuck you in.”
She frowns, but she doesn’t protest. She just sighs and stands. “Goodnight, Rose. I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Goodnight, Kara,” I smile warmly at her. “Thanks for all the fun we had today.”
She nods and slumps to her room, mumbling on her way. “I can’t wait until I’m an adult so I can stay up late…”
I grin at Nate, who grins back. I remember that feeling all too well. But her day will come.
“Thanks for today,” I say to him. “And for letting me completely disrupt your lives this weekend.”
“I don’t mind,” Nate replies. “And Kara thinks you’re the coolest person ever.”
I laugh. “I’m flattered.”
He picks up our used skewers and heads to the kitchen. “The plows should come through by morning, then I’ll take you back to your car.”
I pick up our plates, follow him, and start the water in the sink.
Nate pauses and reaches his hand toward the knob. “You don’t have to do that.”
I squeeze some dish soap into the running water. “I don’t mind. You go say goodnight to Kara.”
“Do you know…um…” He sets the skewers down and hesitates. “…are you sure?”
I look at him beneath a raised brow. He can’t be serious. “Yes, I know how to wash dishes, Nate.”
He raises his hands and steps back with a half grin. “Ok, ok. I’ll be right back, but call out if you need me.”
I flick suds in his direction as he turns and leaves the room.
When I’m alone, I sink my hands into the warm water, reminded of the feel of his warm hands on mine earlier. It felt…nice. No, nice isn’t the word. It felt sort of intimate. We’ve spent so much time glaring at each other, the gentle warmth of his touch was a shocking contrast. A welcome contrast. I can’t believe I’m craving more of it.
I close my eyes and imagine how it would feel if his touch traveled up my arms and to the back of my neck, tracing gently across my skin. I wonder how it would feel if he drew me closer to him and spun me around until his lips found mine.
What kind of kisser is he? Would he be gentle or would he grasp my jaw firmly and pull me against him? The latter makes my heart skip a beat. He’s so big and warm and…gruff. I think I’d like him to grab me like that.
No, what am I doing? I blink my eyes open and stare wildly at the bubbles in the sink. Where is this coming from? I immediately feel like I’m somehow cheating on BigSpoon. I close my eyes again and allow the fantasy to morph in my mind. Tender hands caress my cheeks, so gentle and kind. It’s BigSpoon now. He doesn’t have a face, but he holds me close, and I feel safe with him because he understands me, and he’s sweet, and I know he won’t hurt me like I’ve been hurt in the past.
I long to feel that kind of security, because I never have before, and I smile at the thought just as my phone chimes in my pocket. I jump a foot off the ground, quickly dry my hands, and unlock the screen. My cell signal is back, and I have five texts from Junie. Three from during the storm and two asking me if I have service back yet. I shoot her a quick text to let her know I’m ok and then open Blindly.
It's instant relief to see the little green dot that indicates he’s online. It feels like forever since we’ve spoken, and I can’t wait to tell him I want to meet him.
ASingleRose26 Hey! I’ve been without a cell signal or internet since yesterday. So sorry to keep you hanging!
Almost immediately, his response comes in.
BigSpoon92 Same here. Were you ok in the storm?
I happily cross my ankles and lean against the counter.
ASingleRose26 Yep, I’m safe. You?
BigSpoon92 Yeah, I’m good. But um, I really missed talking to you.
The smile that spreads to my cheeks can probably be seen from space.
ASingleRose26 I feel the same. It’s silly, but this felt like an eternity.
BigSpoon92 Not silly. These last 24 hours made me realize I want to meet you.
My heart skips a beat, and I continue to grin like an idiot, but when Nate returns, I begrudgingly set my phone on the counter and resume with the dishes. I try not to let him see, but I’m giddy. I swirl the soap around on a plate and bite my lip.
“Thanks again for your help,” Nate says as he stands at my shoulder and picks up a clean plate to dry it.
“No problem,” I reply absently as I pause to grab my phone again. I can’t help myself. “Cell service is back.”
“Yeah, I noticed too.”
I type a response to BigSpoon.
ASingleRose26 I want to meet you too. But how does that work? I don’t know what you look like. Actually, I don’t even know your name, haha.
When I set my phone down to resume the dishes, Nate’s pings from his pocket and he pulls it out to type something. He must be letting his family and friends know he’s ok too.
My phone chimes again.
BigSpoon92 You mean, you don’t just want to call me Big Spoon forever? I wouldn’t mind.
I think we could choose a place to meet. Or, I could just send you my picture.
ASingleRose26 Then you’d have to call me Little Spoon forever too, and people might raise their eyebrows at us in public.
I hear Nate’s phone ping again as I type another message.
ASingleRose26 I think the app has an option for us to both agree to send photos.
Nate gets another message and I glance up at him. “Well, you’re more popular than I expected.”
He shrugs without looking at me. “Just a few friends checking in after the storm.”
My phone chimes again.
BigSpoon92 Yep, I just toggled photo sharing on for me. You just have to do the same on your end. I’m nervous…but I don’t know why. I want to meet you no matter what.
ASingleRose26 Same. Can we promise that? That we’ll give it a try no matter what?
The second after I hit send, Nate’s phone pings yet again. He’s nodding at the screen as he types something.
“Ok, Mr. Popular, who are you talking to?” I try to get a peek at his phone but he tilts it away. “It’s a girl, isn’t it?” I tease. He looks too eager for it to just be a friend.
He smiles at his phone while he types, ignoring me.
“A pretty hot girl it seems…” I roll my eyes and look back at my screen as another message comes in.
BigSpoon92 I promise.
ASingleRose26 I promise too.
Another ping sounds from his phone, but he’s not looking at it this time. He’s regarding me curiously. I mirror his expression and furrow my brow. Then he looks down at his screen and types.
My phone chimes.
BigSpoon92 Ok. Have you toggled photo sharing on yet?
I raise my eyes to his again. There’s confusion written on his face. Suspicion too. I type my response while my gaze remains on his.
ASingleRose26 Hang on.
Nate’s phone pings. He gulps, glances down briefly to type something, then returns his eyes to mine.
My phone chimes.
BigSpoon92 What’s happening?
My palms start to sweat, and I take a step away from him. Something is happening. Something bad. I try to stop my brain from connecting the dots. “Who are you texting?” My voice shakes.
He watches me carefully. “Who are you texting?”
I look around at the neatly organized pots and pans in the kitchen of someone who loves to cook. My eyes find the crackling fireplace through the doorway, with the carefully chopped wood stacked nearby. I look down at the pair of boots I wear. Women’s boots that have been collecting dust in the closet.
Neither of our phones have made any more noise.
My breathing increases as I meet Nate’s gaze again, expecting to see bewilderment there, but he doesn’t even look confused anymore. He’s already figured it out, and now he’s watching me put the pieces together too. He looks almost apologetic.
But how could either of us have known?
I’m standing in the kitchen of the stranger I’ve begun to fall for online. And it’s Nate.
And I’m wearing his dead wife’s boots.