Chapter 17 #2
“I hope I am. I think I am.” He panned the room.
“My therapist pinpointed some destructive behaviors.” His gaze swung to me.
“Granted, I was never completely dysfunctional. But I removed things from my life that gave me joy. Like plants…On some level, I thought I wasn’t worthy of such things.
” He shrank a little. “Like socializing at a bar with friends and enjoying myself.” He shook his head.
“Like letting myself fall for a wonderful man who’d give me anything I wanted.
” As his gaze reached mine again, his eyes glittered.
“Or allowing him to tell his friends about us and using a stupid school policy as an excuse.”
An ache surged through my chest. This explained so much.
Finally, he’d exposed himself fully to me.
As I swallowed a lump climbing my throat, I clutched his hands and squeezed.
It was time. “Colton, you deserve it all and more. To have nice things, to enjoy hanging out with friends, and to have my love. I love you, Colton Reed.” With my eyes prickling, I studied him.
Oh shit, would he say it back? Did I say it too soon? Did it even matter?
His eyes grew wide, and he blinked, a tear tumbling down his cheek. “You, you do?”
“Yes, I do. I love you so much it hurts sometimes. I hate to hear that you’ve denied yourself. You deserve it all.” Was he going to say it back? My pulse skyrocketed. If he didn’t, it was okay.
“Tex, I…” He took another hard swallow and swiped the wetness from his cheek. “I love you too. I have for a while now, but I chose not to tell you until we could behave like a couple in public. I figured it would fall flat—”
“Hell no.” As my heart soared, I pushed him onto the couch and lay over him, claiming him in a kiss full of all the love swirling inside me.
This might be the best Thanksgiving I’d ever had.
As the kiss broke, I looked deeply into his eyes.
For the first time, I saw him fully, and it made me love him even more.
“Jesus Christ, Colton, I love you so much.” I pressed another heartfelt kiss on his mouth, losing myself in his warm, soft lips, yielding to mine.
“And the Cowboys have scored!” The television announcer’s voice cut through the air.
Wait, what? I pulled away from him and focused on the television while the replay started. “Um, sorry.” The running back had run for forty fucking yards for a touchdown. “Oh my God, did you see that?” I pointed at the game.
“Yes, I see it.” Colton’s snicker vibrated against my chest. “I’m glad that didn’t happen a few minutes ago.”
I tore my gaze from the TV and returned to him. As I brushed my fingers along his cheek, I said, “I don’t think even a Cowboys touchdown would have stopped me from telling you how much I love you. In fact, I’m sure of it.”
A timer dinged on the stove.
“Oh, the turkey is ready.” Colton pressed a hurried kiss on my lips and shoved me off him. “I’m starved and if I drink any more of this wine without eating, I might pass out on you.” He hopped off the couch and strode into the kitchen.
“We can’t have that.” I followed him and opened the oven door, taking a peek at the meat thermometer.
“Yep, it’s ready. Now we have to let it rest.” Why?
I didn’t know, but the recipe called for it, and I didn’t want to ruin this perfect holiday.
Grabbing the hot pads from a drawer, I pulled the turkey breasts from the oven and set the roasting pan on the stovetop.
“Hey, Tex.” Colton pulled on my elbow.
“Yeah?” I faced him as I ran over the other food I had to prepare in my head.
“Don’t think I’m all better. A lot of work remains. But be aware I’m experimenting with alternative approaches, and I still might get anxious sometimes or fall back on bad habits, but I’m working on it. Okay?” He winced.
“Oh, babe, of course.” I hugged him. Oh my God, I’d called him babe. But we loved each other. It was about time. “I started falling in love with you even before you got help. I understand it’s a process, okay?”
With his voice cracking, he said, “You’re the best, Tex.”
“Thank you.” I squeezed him, kissed his cheek, and then released him. “Let’s get the rest of this food prepared.”
“Yes.” With a sniffle, he swiped his eyes and planted his hands on his hips. “Okay, what can I do?”
We’d had a fantastic meal. I really could cook with the right recipes.
While we washed dishes, I thought through the evening.
I had to call my parents tonight. It was customary since I couldn’t be with them.
Could I introduce Colton to them? We’d confessed our love for each other, so in my mind, we were boyfriends. “Hey.”
“Yeah?” He handed me a rinsed pot.
“I’d like to call my parents when we’re done here. How would you feel about meeting them?” My pulse kicked. Would he agree to it? It would also be the first step in bringing him home for Christmas.
He set the dish he’d been rinsing in the sink and faced me, his brows wrinkling. “Um…you said they always supported you, right?”
After holding my breath for a beat, I said, “Yes. They’ve known I was gay since high school and—”
“And they loved Dante like a son.” He dipped his head and fisted his hand at his side.
Cupping his chin, I raised his face, and our gazes met.
“They’ll love you too. I’m sure of it.” I chuckled.
“Maybe even more since you’re making sure I pass my business analytics class.
My mom’s insistent that I get a degree before I enter the NFL.
” Maybe I shouldn’t have told him the tidbit about Dante.
I didn’t want him comparing himself to him. There was no comparison.
With his gaze shifting between my eyes, he pursed his lips and then said, “Yes. Yes, I want to meet them.”
Emotion bloomed in my heart. This might be too much, but I’d already floated the idea with him. “Good. And can I tell them I’m bringing you home for Christmas? At least for a few days of the break?”
His brows rose. “Um…I think I can swing that. I don’t know the timing yet. I have to call my dad.” He puffed an exhale through his nose. “I suppose I should call him tonight, but he’s probably having a poker night with his single friends.”
“A poker night?” I hooked a brow. Didn’t the man have any other family to spend the holiday with?
“Yes, he has golf buddies, and that’s what they do on Thanksgiving eve if they don’t have family to spend it with.
Or, they visit their families and leave after the meal to play poker.
Since I didn’t go home this year, he’ll be doing that.
” His lips swept to the side. “I should call him after I meet your family.”
“Okay.” I glanced at the dishes still in the sink. “Do you want me to meet him?” He’d already told his father about me, but…
“He thinks you’re my student and a friend. Would you be okay with meeting him as a friend? He’ll ask me how I spent my Thanksgiving.” He chewed his thumbnail. “Usually, I’d spend it with Evan if he’s in town, but Evan is with his hockey buddies.”
“Would your dad know he’s in town?” How closely would his father follow his friend’s schedule? I grabbed his hand and kissed his knuckles. “Listen, tell him whatever you want. I’m okay with it.”
“Okay.” With the tease of a grin, he kissed my cheek and returned to the sink. “Let’s finish these dishes and make our phone calls. We still have football to watch.” He snuck a peek at me.
“Will do.” I grabbed the plate he’d been working on and set it in the dishwasher rack.
Once the dishes were clean, I settled onto the couch with him beside me and paused the television. It was later in Austin, so my family would have finished their Thanksgiving meal. I lifted my phone. “I’m going to FaceTime them, okay?”
He nodded and rubbed his palms down his jean-clad thighs.
“By the way, my mother’s name is Betsy and my dad is John. My brother will probably be there too, and his name is Will.” I took his clammy hand in mine as his face whitened. “Don’t be nervous. They’ll love you.”
“How am I supposed to avoid being nervous? I’ve never met a boyfriend’s parents before.” His throat dipped as he swallowed. “Or anyone who wasn’t a friend.”
“Boyfriend. I like that.” With a grin, I pressed a soft kiss on his lips. “Let’s do this.” I FaceTimed my mom’s number, since she was the one who always picked up. Dad would have all his attention on the game.
The call rang a few times and started. “Oh, hey Travis. Happy Thanksgiving.” Her blonde hair was pulled into a high ponytail, and her blue eyes lit up. The alder wood cabinets in our kitchen showed behind her.
Was she still cleaning up dinner? “Hi, Mom. Happy Thanksgiving to you. I have a little surprise for you.” I wanted to get straight to it before Colton passed out on me.
“Oh? What’s that?” She eyed the phone. “You better not tell me you dropped the class you had problems with.”
“No, of course not.” I glanced at Colton, a small smirk resting on his lips. Leaning toward him, I whispered, “See? I told you.”
“What did you say? Who are you with? Malik and Grey?” She swayed her head as if she could see past the screen.
“No, Mom. I’m spending it with my boyfriend. He’s also my tutor for that class, and thanks to him, I’ll pass and graduate in the spring.” I turned the phone’s screen toward Colton.
He stared for a moment and then said, “Hi, Mrs. Rowlings. My name is Colton, and I tutor your son.” Tossing a glance at me and pinching his lips, he said, “And we, uh—”
“You’re Travis’s boyfriend?” As her grin widened into a full-on smile, she said, “Oh my God, look at you. You’re so handsome.
” With a snicker, she said, “And you must be smart as hell if you’re getting Travis to pass his class.
He’s terrible with math. Always has been. ” Her smile waned. “And call me Betsy.”
“Uh, thank you, Betsy.” He squeezed my hand, resting on my thigh.