Chapter 12
CHAPTER TWELVE
A nnie
It’s been almost a week since Cade left. I’ve spent too much time thinking of him. I did meet up with some friends from high school. We hung out but most of my time has been spent with Rocky and Daddy on the farm. Daddy’s been plagued with finding ways of fixing the mess he created. Mom came back from wherever she was and she’s been giving me the cold treatment, and mostly hanging out in her room since her and Daddy don’t share a room. I’ve had moments of regret for not leaving with Cade. He sent me selfies of himself skiing and hanging out in bars with his friends back home. He is having a lot more fun than me and his hometown looks beautiful.
My cell rings as I’m cuddling Rocky on the couch. Briar’s name lights up the screen.
“Hey,” I answer excitedly.
“Annie, holy shit. Did you see Cade’s post?” she asks, her voice filled with excitement.
“Uh no.”
“Go to Instagram right now,” she demands.
I open the app and search up Cade’s name. I see a pic of him shirtless in the snow with a beanie on his head, wearing snow pants. He’s got a guy friend beside him in the same outfit. They both have their abs on display, but it’s Cade’s abs that make my skin feel too warm. I become restless just staring at him. His hands are forming a heart and he looks like he may be at the top of a mountain. He’s legit crazy.
“Annie, did you read his message?” She is so impatient I wonder what to expect.
“I’m getting to it. I kind of got stuck on how hot he looks in that picture,” I confess because it’s Briar. There isn’t much I don’t share with her.
I read the caption he’s written below the picture. Had so much fun with you at Christmas. Missing you hard, Annie 3
I shoot up to my feet. “That isn’t real, Briar. We’re faking it.”
“But he did spend Christmas with you. You never told me what ended up happening,” she says.
That’s because I’ve been MIA since Cade left.
“He was here for a couple of days. He had to head home to deal with some family stuff,” I explain, not wanting to share personal details about Cade’s family.
“Hmm,” she hums. “I’m not buying it. That boy is gorgeous. Like he’s seriously droolworthy and you’re gorgeous. There isn’t a chance where two single people in your situation didn’t hook up.”
“Briar, you know where I stand on hookups.”
She groans. “Dude, you’re young and probably very horny. Cade looks good, and he’s a nice guy from what I’ve seen. There is nothing wrong with you. You just had bad taste in men. Key word is had, like in the past.”
“Ford wants me back. He made it crystal clear when he was here with his family Christmas Eve.”
“So, do you want him back?” she asks.
“Absolutely not. But I spent the better part of high school crushing on him, dating him, and having him break my heart. A normal person would’ve dumped him from the start.”
“You’re a normal person. Why can’t you just accept you were young and inexperienced and now you know better?”
“Because of Chase. It was a repeat of my relationship with Ford,” I remind her of my boyfriend freshman year. It was Chase who led me to believe I have a pattern where relationships are concerned. I haven’t been with anyone since.
“Again, it was freshman year. You were young. College was new. You aren’t the same girl you were back then. Can you at least admit that?”
“Yes.”
“Halleluiah,” she cheers.
“I’m smarter now. I’m not falling for an athlete who looks like Cade and has a million girls chasing him,” I state as I scroll his Instagram. Tons of girls are commenting. Some are sending crying emojis about him hearting another girl. Others are trying to find out who I am, and some are sending nasty messages about dumping me.
“Damn, you’re impossible,” she accuses.
“How about we focus on you for a second? Where the hell are you? It sounds like you’re in the middle of a party.”
“I took off to Punta Cana for a few days. There was a last-minute deal,” she says. “I’m sipping a margarita at an all-inclusive resort as we speak.”
“Wow, that sounds fun. Good for you. Who did you go with?” I inquire.
“Some friends who stayed behind from Black Jack’s and a few other students from Riverside,” she states.
“Have an amazing time. I’m kinda jealous now.” I laugh.
“Oh, you should be, the beach has crystal-clear water and the sand is so soft and clean,” she goes on.
“Enjoy your trip. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”
“Oh, come on, Annie. We’re having fun all day long and all night long. You really think I’m going to abstain or use a vibrator? There’re some hot guys here with us.” Suddenly she screeches. “Annie, I have to go. Happy New Year. Love you!” she shouts. It sounds like she’s been thrown into a pool or something and the line cuts. I hope her phone didn’t end up in there with her.
I scroll through Instagram some more, but it doesn’t hold my attention. I head to the bathroom to check my hair and apply some lip gloss. I go downstairs and slip on a jacket and boots and head out to the barn to see Sally. If Cade is working on making our fake relationship look real, I should do the same.
I get to the barn and greet the cows. Since it’s late in the afternoon, most of them are lounging. I find Sally, who is grazing on some hay. I walk up to her and pat her head and rub the area between her eyes. I turn the camera on us and take a selfie of the two of us. Then I post it to Instagram and tag Cade. My caption says, “Sally and I both miss you. See you soon.”
It doesn’t take long for him to comment. His comment throws me off when he posts. “Missing you, baby.”
It makes me think of what it would be like to be in a relationship with Cade. He’s so thoughtful. He even snuck out of the house to get me a Christmas present. He was so open. When I think of him cooking Christmas breakfast, a smile comes to my face that he was grossed out by Dad’s special add-in to the French toast, but he still made it because he didn’t want to disappoint. And when he said he’s never really done Christmas, my heart broke. The fact he wanted to do all things Christmas with me, including my and Daddy’s dance on the pond, it makes my heart fill with warmth. The feeling is unsettling. I don’t like it. I prefer to be in control of my destiny. If my heart is on the line, my head isn’t thinking logically, which means I need to shut these feelings down fast. I just wish there wasn’t a long list of memories Cade and I made in such a short time reminding me of what a good guy he truly is.