Chapter 26
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
A nnie
Cade said he just pulled up to my driveway. I head downstairs to open the front door for him, thankful my roommates aren’t home. He said he met with Scarlett this morning, and I want to hear how the conversation went. Knowing Scarlett, she probably tried to win him back. I hate the thought of losing Cade, but I also don’t know if I am courageous enough to tell him how I feel. From the start we had an expiration date, now I’m changing the rules of our game.
It’s snowing heavily as Cade makes his way to the door. He wanted to bring me dinner and I told him to surprise me.
The wind blows inside along with snow. “Hey,” he says, holding a couple plastic bags filled with food.
“Hey,” I say back. He leans in and kisses me, but this time he lingers a little longer and the kiss feels like it is more than just a hello. “It’s freezing.” I close the door quickly as a shiver runs through my body.
“That’s because no one wears shorts and tank tops in the dead of winter.” Cade laughs.
“Indoors is the key word,” I answer. “My roomies love to blast the heat. The house is always hot.”
“And here I thought it was because you are always hot for me.” Cade snickers.
“It is.” I waggle my brows. “What did you get us?” I ask, curious about what was in the bags.
“I got us veal parmigiana, bruschetta, gnocchi, risotto,” he goes on.
“Did you buy everything off a menu at an Italian restaurant?” I giggle.
“Almost, I didn’t know what you’d like,” he answers.
“Follow me” I wave him into the kitchen and settle the bags of food on the table. I open all the containers of steaming goodness. “Where did you get all this stuff?”
“I drove in to town. I wanted to get us something special because I felt like celebrating,” he says with a smile.
“I’m guessing things went well with Scarlett?” I ask.
“I hope so. I made myself clear, it’s just a matter if Scarlett was actually listening to me. I didn’t want to be harsh, but I felt like she deserved the truth,” he explains.
I set plates on the table and we dig in to the food while Cade recounts how she wanted to meet in her dorm room and seemed like she would try to seduce him. Cade is completely transparent with me. It is something I never experienced in a relationship before and it pushes me even more to want to take the leap and share my real feelings.
“I told her I was never in love with her. That I felt obligated because she was in a bad place. I know this all sounds harsh but I was upfront with her from the start, she just believed that, at some point, my feelings would change.”
“Did she agree to get some help? It sounds like she has a lot on her plate,” I ask.
“I even offered to pay for it. I hope you aren’t upset.”
“That’s really sweet of you, Cade. I get it. You felt responsible for her for so long. But there is help at the Wellness Center on campus. She probably has it covered with the health insurance she gets from her parents.”
“I told her that too but I wanted her to have the other options on the table, just in case. I hope she doesn’t use it as a way to keep in touch. I really tried to send the message that I moved on,” he says and that feels like a segue to us. I wasn’t going to divulge my feelings without testing the waters first.
“You mean to your fake girlfriend.” I grin.
Cade was eating the risotto and he places his fork on the plate. “About that, Annie.”
My stomach sinks because Cade seems nervous. Is he going to tell me that we can call it quits now? We really have no reason to continue the ruse. Ford apologized. Daddy settled his case out of court instead of dragging things on. Cade made things clear to Scarlett today.
Now it is all making sense. This celebratory dinner is a dinner to celebrate the end of our fake relationship.
I’m going to be sick.
I push my chair away from the table, causing Cade to furrow his brows.
“It’s. . .fine, Cade. I know our ruse is over.” I stand and walk away from the table. I head into the living room area and look out to the backyard window. It’s dark outside and everything is covered in snow, but I’m overwhelmed and sad.
“Exactly, the ruse is over,” Cade says quietly, coming up behind me. I feel his thumb slowly caress my shoulder blade.
“I know it was fun while it lasted. You don’t have to feel obligated to stay friends or anything like that. I know it may be weird after everything we’ve shared,” I continue. I feel like I am out at sea alone and crying for help. Like a wave of sadness is enveloping me at the idea Cade will no longer be in my life. But I am going to walk away with pride. With my head held high. Not the crying mess I was when I walked away from Ford. This feels so much worse though because I am falling in love with Cade, and I never felt this way about Ford. It probably explains the horrible pain in the center of my chest.
“Annie, is that what you want?” he asks. If I was paying closer attention, I would’ve heard the pain in his tone.
My lower lip quivers. The courage I felt earlier to share my feelings has melted away like ice on a hot day.
“It doesn’t matter,” I reply. I can’t look at him, but I feel his presence behind me like a protective mountain.
“It sure as hell does matter. I need you to look at me,” he insists with a pleading tone that confuses me.
“I can’t.” I giggle through tears. Yup, I’ve gone crazy.
“Why?”
“Because I have tears in my eyes,” I confess. As hard as I’ve tried to swallow my tears away, they have emerged like a faucet.
“Show me,” he says softly. This is Cade, the guy who stood up for me, who broke me out of my shell, who made me want things I thought I would never have.
I slowly turn to face him. The simple action alone is wearing me down, all my emotions are here in plain sight on my face.
“Why are you crying, baby?” He swipes at my tears with his fingers. He cups my face and bends his knees so he is eye level with me. The look on his face is one of utter confusion.
“I thought I’d be okay when this arrangement was over, but I’m not okay, Cade.” I can’t stop the tears falling down my cheeks and Cade is smiling. Wait. Why is he smiling? “Am I missing something?”
“I’m happy you’re not okay because I don’t want us to be over. I am falling so hard for you, Annie, and I didn’t know how to tell you. I know we set ground rules, but they all flew out the window from the start,” he confesses.
“OMG, I’ve been torturing myself, Cade. I’ve been falling for you too. I didn’t think you wanted more. I thought tonight, this dinner was the celebration of our end.”
“Baby, I want it to be the celebration of our beginning. I finally put an end to everything with Scarlett, and it was liberating because it made me free to tell you exactly how I feel.”
“Oh, Cade.” I caress his cheek and he leans in to kiss me. The kiss is soft and exploring, it is deep and meaningful. It is like he is telling me with his lips what his heart is feeling.
We kiss for a good ten minutes. I tug on the strands of his hair, reveling in the fact this isn’t fake or temporary. We no longer have an expiration date. We have real feelings that we laid out. The front door opens and we separate. My roommates walk in together because they are best friends and do almost everything together.
“Let’s finish our dinner,” Cade suggests.
“Oops, are you guys in the middle of some romantic evening?” Sadie asks, walking into the kitchen.
“Not really,” I reply. I don’t want to give her the satisfaction of knowing she is intruding on our special moment.
We finish eating and pack up all the leftovers and we head up to my room. Cade falls back on my bed. “I was nervous all day, trying to figure out how I would tell you how I felt.”
“You probably didn’t come up with the scenario that I would be a crying mess at the thought of us parting ways.”
“I didn’t want you to be a crying mess but your tears show you care, and you should never be ashamed of that,” he replies, and this is why he has become my person.
I walk over to the bed and straddle him. “You say the sweetest things.” I give him a quick peck.
He rests his hands at my hips. “There is something else I’ve been meaning to talk to you about. . .”
“Is it something good?” I ask, feeling elated because our feelings are mutual.
“I want you to come home with me for break. You could meet my mom and my friends. We could ski and have lots of sex.”
“That sounds great. But if I don’t go home now, I won’t see Daddy or the animals until I finish in the spring,” I explain.
“What if we spend a few days in Sunny Springs and then head to Cherry Hills? Besides, I think you owe me a horseback ride on the farm,” he says. The fact he remembers that small detail I suggested back at Christmas shows me just how much he cares.
“Do we get to have relationship sex now?” he asks.
“How is relationship sex different from what we’ve been doing?” I ask back.
Cade doesn’t give me an answer, at least not a verbal one. He flips me on my back from my straddle position on him in one slick move. I let out a loud squeal. He pins my arms above my head, holding them firmly in place with one of his hands, and he dips his head and begins kissing my neck. Soft small kisses that slowly move down my body. I react to him the way I always do, with burning need. A fire he’s lit inside me and only he can put out. He releases my arms to remove my tank top and tweaks my nipples through my bra before unclasping it and discarding it to the floor. He pays special attention to each breast, kneading one breast while his tongue licks and sucks on my other nipple, driving me crazy.
“You are so beautiful, baby. Every inch of you. I didn’t know I could feel this way until you came along,” he says, but it is the way he shows me by cherishing my body that has me undone. This is what he meant would be different. We don’t have to hide our feelings. This isn’t sex, we are making love.
He slowly moves down my body until he gets to the crevice of my thighs. “This is my favorite pussy,” he says before going to town and eating me like I’m his dessert.
He doesn’t hold back, pushing his tongue into my seam, flicking my clit, and sucking it. Driving me wild with need until I fall over the edge, pulled under a tidal wave of an orgasm that takes me into oblivion.
“I’m not done with you yet,” Cade warns just as my orgasm subsides.
“I’m grateful for that,” I joke.
“Not funny.” He frowns.
“I’ve been on the pill the whole month. I started it before we started having sex because I thought we might go there and, well, it’s been a month. I don’t miss a pill. I haven’t been with anyone in years…except you.”
“What is it that you want, baby?” His voice is smooth whiskey, just like the fire in his eyes.
“Do you want to go bareback?” I ask, feeling vulnerable. I have never done it before and I want this night to be special. Something we remember. “I mean, I’m sure you and Scarlett did.”
I don’t have time to finish the sentence when Cade says, “Baby, I never went bare with Scarlett. I wore a condom every single time, but they aren’t foolproof, and maybe one of them had a hole or something,” he explains. “I’d love to take you bare.”
My skin pricks with goosebumps as Cade lines himself up against my slit. “Gah, you feel so warm and wet already.”
He slides inside me easily, despite his girth and length. He fills me to the hilt and it is exquisite and intense. We make love with our eyes open. Cade slams inside me, pauses, and pulls back. His tempo is slow and punishing as I slowly unravel.
His amber eyes are beaming with emotion. Our thrusts grow hungrier and I meet him each time, moving my hips in rhythm with his. I’m building and I feel him hardening and hitting deeper inside me. We fall off the edge together. It is exactly where I want us to be.