30. Kirill
KIRILL
T he moment I open my eyes, I realize two things.
One, I fell asleep.
Ever since my father started his torture sessions, my type of sleep has been only resting my eyes. I’m always fully aware of my surroundings and ready to spring into action at any moment.
I haven’t had a deep night's sleep in…maybe twenty years or so, to the point that I’ve forgotten what it feels like. The army made my sleeping habits even more erratic. What’s the point of resting my eyes when I could be using that time to do something constructive?
Consequently, my sleeping time has gotten shorter and shorter over the years. The only exception was that night in the village. I found it concerning then, and it’s even more troubling now, considering I actually fell into a deep sleep for…over six hours.
This brings me to the next thing I’ve realized.
Sasha is gone.
The bed is crumpled where she slept, and her scent lingers in the air, but that’s the only evidence that she was ever here.
I look down and find a blanket has been thrown over me, surprisingly managing to cover almost the entirety of me.
After I put her to bed, I sat in my usual spot on the sofa, meaning to do some work, but apparently, I fell fucking asleep. Not only did I not notice her waking up, dressing, and leaving, but I also didn’t sense her touching me.
Fucking fuck.
I spring up and head to the bathroom to see if she’s there, despite having the feeling that she’s not. I stop at the threshold as memories from last night hit me. The fucking, moaning, slapping, grunting, and crying.
There was a lot of crying when Sasha couldn’t take being fucked anymore, but sometimes, there was begging, too, so I let her come.
The more the tears streamed down her cheeks, the harder I got. The longer she begged, the more I needed to own her so thoroughly, no one would be able to take her away from me.
I wanted to stop after that first time since she was clearly spent and probably sore, so I tried to be a gentleman and took her into the shower.
But the moment her body fell against mine in a half hug because she couldn’t stand properly, all gentlemanly thoughts flew out the window.
Not that the role had come to me naturally in the first place.
As my nature dictated, I fucked her against the shower wall until she had no choice but to hold on to me. Until she nearly fainted from how many times she came, and I had to use her mouth to finish off.
She did smile, although faintly, and murmured, “Thank you.” Now, I’m not sure what she was grateful for, but I still reveled in the fact that she was thankful to me.
If anyone were to ask what’s come over me, I wouldn’t have an answer. Even I don’t know what the fuck happens to me when Sasha is around.
In the beginning, it was mere curiosity as to why she pretends to be a man, but then I got to know her determination and tenacity, and it grew into a form of respect.
That says something since I only hold respect for a select few people and it took them a long time to earn it.
Soon after, I was irritated that she had the audacity to hide secrets from me when I own her life.
Now, it’s fucked-up desire. The type that’s impossible to satisfy, no matter how long or hard I fuck her. As if to prove my words, my dick strains against my sweatpants, demanding another round in her tight cunt.
No, it’s not her cunt. It’s mine .
Everything Sasha has to give is mine to own, no matter what she says about it.
I head to the closet and change into a suit, still speculating about why the fuck I fell asleep. And why Sasha disappeared while I was sleeping.
She ran away, and you know it.
I button my shirt with controlled movements in spite of the fire that’s turning my insides to ashes. I’ve always been the type to turn calmer but deadlier in situations that go against my desires.
It allows me to see the picture from all angles and come up with the perfect plan to eliminate the problem.
Right now, that problem isn’t the assholes in the organization whose graves I’m slowly but surely digging. It isn’t my idiot brother or my useless mother.
It isn’t even Karina’s wasted life.
It’s the reminder that Sasha has a man somewhere.
I didn’t hear the entire conversation last night, but I heard enough to know she misses him, loves him more, and she’ll soon go back home for good. Oh, and she was smiling like an idiot and kicking imaginary rocks with her foot.
That’s the first time I’ve seen her that happy. It’s also the first time I’ve wished I had the power to pull someone from the other end of the phone and shoot him between the eyes.
But I can’t even find out who he is, because she shot the phone. To protect him.
From me .
My fingers tighten around the button, but I release it before I break the thing off.
She can try to hide him, but she’s underestimating my abilities to find anyone I set my mind on.
After I’m finished dressing, I leave my room and send her a text.
Kirill: My office. Now.
She doesn’t read it. I glare at the phone as if that will make her magically appear.
“Boss.”
I lift my head to find Viktor standing by the stairs and watching me peculiarly. “What is it?”
“The situation is a bit complicated.”
“Out with it, Viktor. Don’t just stand there staring like an idiot.”
“You’re probably not going to like this.”
“In that case, spare me the details.” I pause. “Where’s Sasha?”
“Lipovsky is involved in the situation you’re probably not going to like.”
I narrow my eyes. “What’s he done now?”
“You better see it for yourself. It’s all happening in the clinic where Mr. Konstantin is resting—”
Before he’s finished his sentence, I’m already storming outside. I’m going to break Konstantin’s neck and lock Sasha the fuck up. It’s not enough that she pulled the whole stunt about saving him yesterday, but she also had the nerve to run away from me to go to him first thing this morning.
When I arrive at the clinic, one of the nurses bows her head in greeting. “Mr. Konstantin is in the second room on the left.”
I give a curt nod, and she smiles as she continues on her way. She must think I’m here to visit my useless brother, which is far from being the case.
I’m ready to send him to the grave he escaped from last night—
My thoughts come to a halt when I reach the door to his room. Konstantin sits in bed with a hideous-looking face that has more blue and purple than normal skin, but he’s grinning from ear to ear.
None other than Karina helps feed him some soup while smiling. She doesn’t do that, or she stopped for years, and I almost forgot she has deep dimples in her cheeks.
The fact that my recluse sister actually went out of the house and walked the length of the garden is a feat in and of its own. Not only that, but she’s also visiting Konstantin. I always got the impression she didn’t like him, despite his attempts to take her under his wing.
Another surprising fact is the absence of Yulia from his bedside. In the past, if he so much as fell and scraped his knee, she’d fawn over her golden son for days, always blaming me for not taking care of ‘my brother.’
The funny thing about Yulia is that Konstantin becomes my brother when it suits her. When it doesn’t, I’m just the devil who took ‘her’ son’s rightful place.
Sasha stands by Karina’s side, smiling softly, and the whole picture starts to become clear. She must’ve convinced my sister to visit Konstantin and accompanied her on the journey from the house to here.
Judging by Karina’s long-sleeved dress and boots, she was mentally prepared to go outside.
“She wanted to come last night,” Sasha tells my brother. “But she was wary of your mother’s presence.”
“I see,” he says. “It was good that you texted me. I told Mother I needed another doctor, and she went to personally make sure she gets the best.”
Did he just mention texting? As in, Sasha is texting him?
I’m seriously contemplating why I didn’t let Viktor shoot him last night in that fucking duffel bag.
Sasha nods. “I really wanted to bring Karina here when your mother wasn’t around, hoping to make it easier for her.”
“Good call,” says Konstantin.
“Thanks, Sasha.” Karina takes her hand and offers her a dimpled smile. “I couldn’t have done this without you.”
“Well, isn’t this lovely?” I stride inside. “A family reunion that’s only missing cake and champagne.”
“Kirill!” Karina says excitedly and jumps up, nearly spilling the contents of the bowl. “Look, I’m outside! I came through the garden and only had one panic attack and…”
She trails off, realizing that she’s talking to me when she swore she’d hate me for eternity. Then she flops back to Konstantin’s side, hugging the bowl.
“Am I dreaming, or are you here to visit?” my brother asks with a hint of annoying gloating.
“Definitely dreaming. I’m here to inspect the situation, not visit.” My attention slides to Sasha, who seems to find the top of Karina’s head interesting.
“Would it kill you to be a decent human being for once?” A tinge of venom spills in his tone.
“Very rich coming from you, Konstantin, considering how you wanted to get rid of me the moment I returned. Who’s the subhuman between us, I wonder?”
“You fucking—” He starts to lunge forward but pauses, then winces and breaks into a fit of coughs.
Karina goes still, her eyes turning shifty. She was never good with stressful situations or anything sensory in nature.
It’s Sasha who delicately rests him back in place. “You’re still recovering. Don’t push yourself.”
My jaw tightens, and I resist the urge to haul her up by the waist or throw her over my shoulder. I don’t, though. For the simple reason that I don’t want Konstantin in my business. If he gets wind of how infuriatingly Sasha affects me, he’ll use it to his advantage. No doubt about it.
“Don’t get involved in this,” Konstantin warns me, still speaking with difficulty. “I’ll find out who did this to me and make them pay. This is my fight, stay away from it.”