Chapter 18 Skarth the Godless
Eighteen
Skarth the Godless
I’m not one to believe in things I cannot see, but something monumental will occur today. Something that will change the world.
We’re not ready for battle, but I fear the choice is no longer ours.
“What plagues you?” Aedan asks, coming to a stand beside me.
It’s the cusp of dawn; the most peaceful time of the day. The condensation dances off the lake, appearing mythical and setting the stage for the ominous forthcoming.
“I fear our time has come. No warrior is ever ready for battle, but this war is one that will change everything. I can feel it in my bones.”
“What do you think Aethelbald has planned?”
“I think he will not hold back. He will ensure he has every advantage at his disposal, so if one measure fails, he has another to back him.”
“What do you suspect his collateral is now that your children are safe?”
I mull over his question. “I believe he will have the kings of England hostage and will play on Emeline’s weakness for them to force surrender.”
“You believe he is biding his time until then?”
“Yes. Without competition, a man is the victor. If he hasn’t already, Aethelbald will ensure the other kings are no longer a threat.
The only way for him to win is to cheat and eradicate anyone who stands in his way.
We’ve sent word to the other kingdoms, but I suspect the kings are already taken or sunken to a watery grave.
“In the end, I fear the only thing standing between Aethelbald and conquering England will be Emeline.”
“We ambush them then?”
“They will be expecting an attack. The only way to outsmart him is to present ourselves as vulnerable.”
“He’ll kill you before we can infiltrate the palace walls.”
“It’s a risk we must take. Emeline and I will put on a front. We attempt to reason with Aethelbald, saying we cannot win with the army we have. He will put his demands in place, and we bide our time until you and Ulf ambush from the inside.
“Emeline knows that palace like the back of her hand. She will instruct where to go without getting caught.”
“And in the interim, we’re to hope Aethelbald doesn’t cut off your heads?” Aedan asks, not concealing his objection to our plans.
“We just stall him. I am betting on his obsession with Emeline to work in our favor.”
“I want to help.”
Aedan and I turn to see Benedict.
A mere boy, but far braver than ten men. Perhaps his youth is the reason he is naive. Whatever the reason, he is an ally we need.
“Aethelbald wants me dead. So allow me to be bait.”
“Absolutely not.” Her voice is hoarse from her slumber, and her fatigue is apparent, but it seems Emeline also feels the change in the air.
I kiss her atop the head as she hugs me good morning.
Memories of last night linger. Although it was pleasurable, I don’t plan on making it a regular thing.
I meant it when I said Emeline is mine. Although I accept her love for Ulf, that does not mean I am going to consent to another man touching her.
Sigrith and Ulf appear.
I do not understand what my sister or my beloved sees in this buffoon. He winks at me as he drinks the hot tea he most likely stole from a monk.
“Get ready, today we ride to the palace. Sigrith, I ask something important of you.”
My sister arches a brow.
“I do not trust anyone but you to care for my sons. I know you want to fight, but I need you here to protect my children and defend the monastery if it is attacked.”
“Skarth,” she protests, but Ulf nods.
“For once, I agree with your brother.”
“If something were to happen to them, I may as well perish in battle. Please, do this for me.” I hope she sees reason.
With a sigh, she eventually concedes.
“With that settled, we stick to the plan. Emeline and I will ride to the castle. I don’t know what we’ll ride into. But we do not have the manpower to win a war. We do not have the time to recruit or train men. And honestly, I do not trust many, whether that be Dane or Saxon.
“We only have ourselves.”
“This is the worst idea you’ve had,” Ulf says, but he, too, can see we’ve run out of options.
“Without an army to back us, it’s suicide if we declare war. We use our smarts to battle because Aethelbald lacks any brains.”
“And what if you cannot stall him for long enough?”
“You work fast then.”
Ulf runs a hand over his beard, deep in thought. “I am going to talk to the gods before we leave. Or perhaps we should seek counsel from your son.”
This isn’t a bad idea.
Emeline nods, granting me permission. “I hate this for our son.”
“As do I. Will you prepare what we need?” I ask her.
“Skarth—” she gently protests, not happy that I wish to speak to Loki alone.
I cup her beautiful face into my palms. We have been through so much.
I never anticipated what was fated for us the moment our paths crossed.
Whatever the gods have destined for me, I accept because I have found my true love.
We’ve lived and loved, and if this is the end, then I do not want her to know.
She will be too busy worrying about my safety to forfeit her own, putting England in danger.
I won’t allow it.
“My love, please let me do this.”
She wrestles with herself, but eventually nods, sensing this is something I must do.
I place a tender kiss on her soft lips. “We face our fate today. I love you. In this lifetime and the next.”
Her eyes fill with tears. “ég elska tig svo mikie. Tú ert líf mitt.”
Whenever she speaks Norse, my heart swells and feels as if it’ll burst from my chest. “You are my world too.”
And with that, I leave her to prepare us for battle as I find Loki.
I can understand why Christians find sanctuary in this place. It’s peaceful. And a sense of calm befalls us. Brothers are dealing with the aftermath of a war they did not want. We don’t speak. I quietly walk the halls and find my sons in the gardens.
Sune is practicing his swordsmanship. I see a determined warrior. I also see someone with a dangerous rage. He doesn’t stop charging at his invisible opponent, swinging and delivering fatal blows.
“Hello, son,” I say, but am ignored.
Loki sits dead center in the rose garden. He closely examines a ladybug that lazily crawls along his curled fingers.
“Hello, Father,” he greets me without looking my way.
“Morning, my son. How fare thee?”
“I am rested but fatigued from last night. I dreamed of today.”
“And what did you dream?”
“You come to me for answers, but you know them, Father,” he says, releasing the ladybug and watching as she takes flight.
“What do I know, son?” I inquire, coming to a crouch before him.
He is such a beautiful child. His energy is pure; half Saxon, half Dane. He truly is a miracle. The gods chose him, and he will carry my legacy when I’m nothing but a memory.
“Today, you will meet the gods. Both Saxon and Dane, for you to choose. Both welcome you, for you have fought for both. But you’re tired, Father.” He gets onto his knees and places a tiny hand on my cheek. “It’s time to rest. For love will save you and…you will save love.”
“You speak in riddles.”
“No, Father, I speak through the gods’ eyes. Valhalla or heaven. This is what they see. Heaven is where Mother is destined. But your fate is undecided.”
Loki looks through me in a sense. The most incredible thing to witness.
“I go where your mother goes.”
Loki smiles. “That is why the gods will not be angered if you choose heaven. But you will have to wait a very long time for Mother.”
“I’ll wait an eternity for her. If this is what the gods want, let us fill these moments with memories you keep to remember me by.
I am so proud of you. You are a miracle.
A gift from the gods. You are part Saxon, part Dane.
Your heart and blood are pure. But a warrior’s blood courses through your veins.
“Look after your mother and brother, for I fear he is cursed with my wrath and tenacity.”
“I will, Father. We will meet again. It’s never goodbye.”
My wise son will change the world. I know he will.
“You’re right, my son. For as long as you and your brother exist, so do I.” I kiss his forehead, savoring his scent and the feel of his small frame in my arms.
How I wish I had more time there. So much was wasted. But I will fight for his freedom and die a thousand deaths if it means he and Sune grow in a world that is just and rich in equality.
“Remember, I love you. Always.”
“And I love you, Father.”
Removing the Mjolnir from around my neck, I place the silver chain around his neck.
“I do not need a token to remember you by because you are a part of me,” Loki says, cupping the Mjolnir pendant in his tiny palm. “But I will cherish it forever.”
I hug him tightly, unbelieving that I gave life to someone so remarkable. I wish I could see him grow into the brilliant man I know he will become, but life isn’t destined that way.
Letting him go, I tap the end of his nose and smile.
There will never be enough time to say goodbye to your child, so I simply leave Loki in the rose garden, already knowing that he will change the world.
Sune continues his invisible battle, but despite his apathy toward me, I wish to let him know that I am proud of the man he is and will become.
“Sune, come now.”
When he continues to ignore me, I speak to him in Norse.
He understands the seriousness of my order and soon puts down his sword. He walks over, pouty lip upturned. He is angry about the predicament we’re in, and I know he blames me for it.
I drop to a squat. “You fight well, son. A true warrior.”
Sune listens but doesn’t speak.
“You are angry with me, and I understand. I wasn’t there for you or your brother.”
“Or Mother,” Sune adds, folding his arms in defiance.
“Yes, you’re right. I was not. But I hope when you are older, you will understand why that is. I believed I was doing the right thing. Your mother has sacrificed so much for this country, and I only threatened that hard work.”
It sounds like an excuse, but I can hope when he grows older and wiser, he will see why I did what I did.