4. Dom
4
DOM
I watched Corey walk out the door after my speech about rules. I knew I was being an ass. I could only imagine what my sons would say if they’d witnessed the exchange. They’d remind me Corey was scared and alone and that he needed someone to take care of him.
I could save his life, and I could make sure Lisa could never hurt him, but I couldn’t be anything else for him. I wasn’t capable of that.
Are you sure?
I refused to consider that question. I wouldn’t open myself up to anyone. The only way I could survive now was to be the man I’d become.
It didn’t matter that, somewhere in the tiny part of my heart that wasn’t solid stone, I wanted to be someone who could console another person, but I didn’t know how to do that with Corey any more than I’d known how with my sons when I’d first invited them to live here.
You fixed your relationship with them. Look how far you’ve come.
They tolerate me, but they’re family. Why would anyone else want to be around someone like me? And why the hell was I worrying about that when Lisa was back? I picked up my phone and made a call.
X answered almost immediately. “Dominic, problems already?”
“You knew there would be problems from the start. I’m not a babysitter, and I do not appreciate being manipulated and having information withheld.”
“So Lucien told you about Lisa?”
I slammed my fist down on my desk. “Yes, he did, but I should have heard it from you. It should have been the first thing you told me.”
“No. You wouldn’t have agreed to this assignment then. You would have charged off after her when I have other people to do that. I want your instincts and your aim standing between her and Corey.”
That was how it was going to be. She wanted to hurt him, and I wouldn’t let her, but that didn’t mean I intended to let X off the hook for tricking me. “I’m not a bodyguard.”
“I’ve always heard you were up for anything, capable of solving any problem.”
“As an assassin. But you don’t want me to shoot him, do you?”
“Already wanting to?”
“From the moment he knocked on the door.” That wasn’t really true. His desire to keep asking questions and his lack of fear of me was irritating, but I also found him fascinating even though I couldn’t say why.
“Dom, you’re the right person to protect him. You know that.”
I did but I had no intention of admitting it.
“You’re the one person I know she can’t seduce. I’m absolutely confident you would never give Corey up.”
“No way in hell is that bitch going to touch him.”
“Exactly.” I could hear the smile in his voice. Fuck. I was playing right into his hands, but he was right. Lisa was incredibly seductive and a master of manipulation. She’d gotten to me once, but never again. “I know you can handle this.”
“Of course, I can handle it. That doesn’t mean I want to. I want to go after her and end this one and for all.”
“I know you do, but keeping Corey alive to testify against her will be a form of revenge.”
“Shooting her through the head would be much better.”
“I’m sure it would, and if it comes to that, you’ll do it, but I want to bring down everyone she’s involved with, not just her.”
I sighed. “If I shoot her, they’ll all scatter.”
“Exactly. As you’ve known for years. That’s why you haven’t gone after her.”
I hated how right he was. I hated how he seemed to know everything about everybody.
“There have to be other people you trust. What about Lucien?”
“Too busy.”
“I can take over his tasks, and he can?—”
“Dominic, I’m asking you as a personal favor.”
I sighed. X didn’t ask for favors often. I was a few years older, but we’d gone to the same private school. We’d been in the same circles for a very long time, and he was one of the best men I’d ever met.
“Fine. I’ll do it. But don’t expect me to be nice to him.”
He chuckled. “I warned him you wouldn’t be.”
“He didn’t seem to get the message.”
“Is he being nice to you? Trying to start conversations?”
I groaned. “It’s worse than that; he’s trying to help me.”
“You really are having a tough time. But I believe in you. You can do this. You could even talk to him if you had to.”
“Fuck you.” I ended the call.
This was all my fucking fault. I wasn’t just a sad imitation of my former self. I was responsible for all the death and loss Lisa had caused since she’d tried to kill me. I could’ve stopped it if I’d made different choices. I walked to the bar cart under the window, picked up a glass, filled it from my decanter, and downed it all in one go, then immediately poured myself another.
I froze as I brought the glass to my lips. I’d promised Corey I would take care of him. I couldn’t do that if I was drunk. If I let myself surrender to oblivion the way I wanted to, I wouldn’t be alert if Lisa—or, more likely, one of the men she so easily wrapped around her finger—came looking for him.
I texted Beatrice, asking her to bring my dinner to my office. The house was old enough to be equipped with a system of bells to summon servants from below, but romantic as that might be, I wasn’t actually living in a Gothic novel, so I’d modernized.
At least I could lose myself for a few moments in the pleasure of a good dinner and a nice glass of wine. It wasn’t the type of oblivion I wanted, but it was one of the few pleasures I allowed myself these days.
My phone dinged with her response. Dinner was ready, and she would have it to me in a few minutes.
Her soft knock made me smile. It had taken months of working for me, but she’d grown accustomed to my need for quiet and darkness. She no longer flung all the curtains open to bring in the bright sun, and she walked silently—or nearly silently. I could hear her, but I was trained to listen for the smallest sound. “Come in.”
She set a tray on my desk, and I sighed. Beatrice’s vodka sauce was almost as good as my mother’s and the wine would be excellent since it had come from my cellar. I only bought the best.
“Your guest is eating in the kitchen right now, and I showed him the other rooms he’s allowed in.”
How had I forgotten he didn’t know his way around the house? “Thank you.”
There were rooms Beatrice wasn’t allowed in either, though more of the house was open to her than Corey. We’d built some trust, and I absolutely hated cleaning.
She studied me for a moment, a frown on her face. “I thought you might… Never mind. I hope you enjoy your dinner.”
I nodded, unwilling to find out what she’d been about to say. “I’m sure I will.”
Had she thought I might want to join Corey? I absolutely did not, no matter how much I found his bright smile intriguing. He was my opposite, all sunshine and light, while I preferred to stay in the darkness. He was the last sort of person I needed to be around.