Chapter 34
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
I t was the day before the initiation test, and Thea was already in the training arena.
She whirled her two practice swords through the air, hoping to keep the fear at bay.
Kipp and Cal had been taken to the fortress infirmary for a final night of observation.
Wren had informed her that they both looked well, that they were expected to make a full recovery.
But her sister’s words of reassurance couldn’t drive the images of them hanging from the ceiling in that cave, their bodies battered by the storm.
Hawthorne had told her that in order to survive Thezmarr, she needed friends – but they didn’t need her. All knowing her had done for them was nearly get them killed.
Maybe this was the reality check I needed , Thea thought as she danced her way through a parry and strike combination Lachin had taught her before he’d died.
She didn’t go to the Great Hall for first meal.
She stayed to train alone in the arena, and when the other shieldbearers appeared for their last training session, she fell to the back, distancing herself from the rest.
But when she saw Seb amidst the crowd, not a glimmer of remorse on his face, nor sporting any evidence of punishment, she felt that strange surging sensation from within.
It went deeper than rage and it coursed through her like a burning current.
Her fingernails cut into her palms and it took every ounce of willpower to keep her boots planted to the spot.
The bastard had seen her though, had seen the look on her face that told him she would end his miserable existence here and now if —
‘What are you looking at, stray?’ he sneered, taking a step towards her.
Thea exhaled through her nose, fists still clenched at her sides, still as death as he approached her.
‘I heard about that mishap with your little friends,’ he said.
Thea did not speak.
Her silence seemed to only spur him on and he drew closer, close enough that Thea could feel his hot breath on her face. She did not yield a single step.
‘Why don’t you draw that toy sword of yours and see what it’s like to fight a real —’
‘Barlowe!’ Torj bellowed.
Seb had the good sense to flinch at the tone.
‘If you’re challenging Althea to a duel, I suggest you do it after the test tomorrow,’ the Warsword said coldly. ‘Now stop wasting everyone’s time and get back to your training.’
Seb’s narrowed eyes slid back to Thea. ‘How many Warswords are you fucking? They’re constantly saving your hide,’ he hissed. ‘But they won’t always be around…’
Thea blinked slowly. There was no need to respond to that. She had made her vow to Seb weeks – months – ago now, when Lachin had still been alive. She had made her promise loud enough for him to hear, for all the shieldbearers to hear.
When we face each other again, I’ll have you on the ground. And unlike me, you won’t get back up.
It was those words she clung to now, allowing them to anchor her fury, in her outrage at the injustice of it all.
She would hone that rage and that strange energy that coursed through her very being.
She would sharpen it to the point of a blade and use it to carve her way through the initiation test that awaited her.
The rest of the day was a blur and suddenly night was upon her.
Thea was more on edge than ever, and the final drills and warnings weren’t the only reason.
Though she hadn’t seen Hawthorne since, he was never far from thought, stoking that fire within and she was worried it might consume her, might distract her from the task at hand.
King Artos had indeed extended his stay in Thezmarr to oversee the outcome of the initiation test, a decision that had many of the older warriors whispering amongst themselves.
At the evening meal on the eve of the trial, King Artos once more sat in the Guild Master’s seat, while Osiris made his formal address from the chair to the king’s left.
‘My good shieldbearers of Thezmarr,’ Osiris called, raising his hands for silence.
Thea shifted in her seat, focusing her gaze on the Guild Master and ignoring the glances Kipp was shooting her way.
She’d kept her distance from both him and Cal since they’d been discharged from the infirmary.
Kipp had been trying to get her alone ever since, Cal less so.
But she didn’t know what she’d say to them, didn’t know how to tell them how sorry she was.
Quiet settled across the hall and Osiris spoke.
‘Though it may be hard to believe…’ he started.
‘I was once where you now stand; a young man on the edge of becoming a true member of the guild. I know the fear, the excitement, the trepidation that courses through you now, and I know how hard you have worked to get here. This past season has been harrowing. And it would be remiss of me not to acknowledge those we have lost along the way.’ He gave a nod to the Three Furies.
A wave of sadness rushed through Thea, and she felt a stab of pity for poor Lachin and the future he would never have.
‘With you at the helm of our army, their sacrifices will not be in vain,’ Osiris called.
‘Through blood and sweat you have trained, you have fought to become part of this great force, the most noble part to play any of us can hope for in this adventure we call life. Tomorrow, you will make your commanders, your masters and our Warswords proud and come the night, we shall celebrate your victories.’
Osiris paused, scanning the faces before him, letting his words sink into the impressionable masses below.
He cleared his throat and clasped his hands together.
‘Sometimes it can be easy, amidst the drills, amidst the exhaustion and the pain, to forget what it is we truly do here at Thezmarr. But our purpose is always worth remembering: we protect the midrealms at all costs. And at dawn tomorrow, our test will beg the question: are you worthy of it? Are you up to the task?’
Goosebumps rushed across Thea’s skin, and all around her, her fellow shieldbearers burst into cheers and applause, the sound thunderous.
As her cohort toasted to their imminent success, Thea slipped away from the Great Hall and went to find her sister.
Wren, Sam and Ida were in Wren’s rooms waiting for her. On the eve of what would become the next phase of her life, it felt only right to spend it with those who had been there from the beginning, those who had never wavered.
Wren had sweet-talked the cook into giving them a handful of desserts, which the women devoured as they sat cross-legged on Wren’s bed, quietly talking about what the trial might entail tomorrow. Thea knew they could never guess what awaited her, but their presence meant the world.
‘Have those two idiots come to their senses yet?’ Ida asked, stuffing an entire sugared pastry into her mouth.
Thea had confided in Wren about what she’d overheard Cal and Kipp talking about back at Hawthorne’s cabin, so it was no surprise to her that the others knew as well. However, she found it didn’t bother her. She knew her secrets were safe here.
She leaned against the wall, picking at her own dessert. ‘For what it’s worth, I think it was mainly Cal who had his doubts about me.’
‘The handsome one?’ Sam asked.
‘Yes, the handsome one.’ Thea smiled sadly.
Sam made a noise of displeasure. ‘That’s the problem with the pretty men, there’s not usually much going on up there.’ She tapped her head with a knowing look.
Ida snorted. ‘I didn’t realise you were all that interested in their minds, Sam.’
Sam shrugged. ‘If I were, I’d know to expect disappointment.’
Wren shook her head in amusement before growing serious. ‘I’m not saying this to excuse what Cal said, but… I think he’s in shock. He suffered a trauma and he’s trying to process it. Don’t take it personally, Thea. He’ll come around.’
That image of him and Kipp strung up in the cave flooded Thea’s mind anew and she had to swallow the lump in her throat before she spoke again, her voice small. ‘But he was right…’
‘No, Thea,’ Wren said firmly. ‘He wasn’t.’
‘Seconded,’ Ida agreed.
Sam drained her cup of wine. ‘Thirded.’
‘No woman is responsible for the weak acts of a man who’s had his masculinity so easily threatened,’ Wren stated, the strength of her words commanding them all. ‘A true man would be proud to fight at your side. He would recognise that you are a force to be reckoned with, Althea Nine Lives.’
Thea’s eyes burned as emotion swelled in her throat. These women had been here all along, quietly supporting her through it all.
Wren raised her cup. ‘You are infinitely more capable than you could ever dream, Thea, and tomorrow you’ll show them all.’
‘To Thea,’ Ida declared, ‘and her many lives.’
Thea tapped her cup against her sister’s and her friends’, and revelled in the determination that settled deep in her bones.
It was still dark outside when Thea left Wren’s rooms, the others snoring soundly. Tightening her cloak, she braced herself against the icy winter air and made for the Bloodwoods.
At the edge of the small clearing, where his arrow remained stuck in the tree, Wilder Hawthorne waited for her in the dappled moonlight.
‘You shouldn’t be out here,’ he said, his voice low. He cut a striking figure and, dressed in black leathers with a fur cloak draped across his broad shoulders, he looked more imposing than ever.
Yet all Thea wanted to do was touch him.
When she reached him, she kept a few feet of distance between them. ‘I had to see you, had to talk to you before… Before everything changes.’
Those silver eyes pierced hers as he stepped closer. ‘We have unfinished business, you and I.’
Warmth pooled low in Thea’s body. ‘We do.’
‘I need you to know,’ he said, voice rough. ‘That the other night… I didn’t want to leave you. I have never wanted to leave you.’