Chapter 16
T here was no rest that week for our Congregation as they prepared for holy war, other Prophets and Enforcers visiting in a steady rumble of noisy motorcycles.
William appeared several other times, too, as our Prophet ordered the drones to Ronan’s Congregation over and over, first sending more loads of rocks to dam up their rivers in an attempt to disrupt and flood their lands.
“He can send his men to shoot them down,” the Prophet said, exultant triumph in his voice. “But he doesn’t know how they work. There will soon be enough stone and debris to dam up their river completely. We will strike after the Bloodmoon. The Allfather has shown me that is a good time.”
My brother was full of confidence even though he had not killed Ronan.
“He went for the door, ” he laughed as I prepared supper. “Trying to run away from me. He will fall fast and soon we will have a new home in the Garden lands.”
Since dragging me back home, Rhyder had barely let me have a moment away. While most men would clean their weapons or work with tools outside, Rhyder had piled a particularly smelly motorcycle part on the kitchen table because he couldn’t bear to be away from me.
I stirred stew on the stove. Craig had had a very particular gym bro type of diet, and looked at the simple stews and meals I knew how to cook with palpable disgust.
Not my brother.
His fingers were streaked with motor oil, and the thick bands of muscle rippled in his arm, straining against his T-shirt as he looked over at me.
“Your stew smells amazing.”
I looked down at what I had always thought of as Desperation Stew. End of the winter storehouse frozen root vegetables and broth stock, but it did have some savory bird that my brother had shot last night.
“He went for his Helpmeet,” I said, feeling a little trickle of anxiety.
“I didn’t see a woman there,” Rhyder said.
“You never do,” I retorted sourly, but with a little bloom of heat in my chest, and then it was forgotten as my brother got up from the table and loomed over me, grabbing my chin with dirty fingers and kissing me.
And so when it came time for my Spiritual Guidance I wasn’t prepared for the danger.
The entire Congregation was gathered in the center of camp, waiting in respectful rows for each Head of Household to report the guidance for the week and punish any further infractions.
My hips ached from standing so still during the lengthy rote recitations of punishments given to Helpmeets, the sins they had allegedly committed.
Slothful
Foolish
Quarrelsome
Envy
Such a poor mouth-fucking that Brother Paul had to go find a camp whore for a better one
For this crime, Brother Paul’s Helpmeet was cut, little sharp slices all around her mouth, to encourage her to open wider next time.
I looked over at Norah and Elizabeth, standing dully at the edge of the crowd.
At least William wasn’t here to see if she was punished. It had become increasingly painful to me to see Norah’s mental and physical deterioration. I tried to sneak little bits of extra food and drink to the two of them, but it was so difficult. Aunt Piety watched them with eagle eyes, and since they were the only two available camp whores after the devastation of the attacks, there was always someone who wanted the use of their bodies.
My own cunt was sore, but because of my brother’s protection I was healthy.
I was snapped out of my musing by Eli’s voice.
“Brother Rhyder,” Eli said. “What do you have to report for Temperance? What have you done to counteract the harmful effects of living in the city? What have you done to wash her filth away?”
“We read from the Words morning and night,” Rhyder said, and the excitement and passion throbbed in his voice.
That was sort of true. Rhyder recited some of the Words morning and night before he tore into me.
“Her sins,” Eli pressed. “What are her sins ? What punishment are you meting out to Temperance this week?”
“None,” Rhyder said, his deep voice low and rumbly. “She has committed no sin this week.”
There was a brief silence and I felt danger rise on the back of my neck in inch after inch of tingly fear.
I concentrated on staring at my feet, but I could feel the eyes of the Congregation shift to me.
“No sin?” the Prophet interposed, and I fucking felt him dart a speaking glance at Eli. “Brother Rhyder, you are always so zealous to root out sin! All women need guidance with the hand, and whores especially.”
“She has done nothing meriting my hand,” Rhyder said after a moment. I felt him dart a glance over at me.
And I knew. His pride and love could not possibly be written any plainer or clearer on his face.
“Think harder,” the Prophet said. “Surely you can think of some necessary discipline.”
For a moment there was silence in the clearing and terror pulsed through me, a growing sense of community anger and all focused on me.
Just punish me, brother!
“All right,” Rhyder said. “Come here, Temperance.”
I wasn’t a fucking idiot. If I wanted to somehow survive, I would do exactly what Rhyder told me to in public.
He sat down in a chair and I walked over to him, my stomach suddenly fluttering with nerves.
“Over my knees,” he said, and I complied, stretching my body over his big thighs, my breasts squashed against the hard muscles in his legs.
“It is just a little reminder,” Rhyder said, and his voice was a caress.
Godsdamn, this was not how you were supposed to discipline women.
Congregants were not encouraged to be overly affectionate with their Helpmeets and certainly not their whores. They were taught from a very young age that women needed ceaseless vigilance to keep them on a righteous path.
But this was one lesson that had never taken with Rhyder.
In all other ways he was a model Congregant, an obedient cultist, a dedicated holy warrior who wouldn’t hesitate to slit the throat of any man his Prophet wanted dead.
But he loved his sister
Blindly, fervently, with a bonedeep unholy obsession rooted deep in his brain and soul.
It simply did not compute with him that I could ever be wicked.
I stretched across his massive thighs, clutching his legs so I wouldn’t roll off.
My dress was made of thin fabric, covered with the sweatshirt Rhyder insisted would keep me warm.
My brother carefully raised my skirts, his fingers only a raspy whisper across my skin. I could already feel his huge cock hardening, digging into my side and spreading across my bare belly.
Then he pulled my panties down, whisper-gentle again, folding them neatly against my knees.
Fuck
I felt a shameful pull deep in my belly.
“Take this, in remembrance,” Rhyder said, and his hand landed on my ass.
It was a light smack, his fingers sliding between my cheeks for a second before bringing them back up again.
Hell, I didn’t even know his hand could spank me that lightly.
The shameful squirmy feeling deep inside me twisted again, wet between my thighs.
He raised his hand and spanked me again, another light smack that barely singed my ass.
And I felt the disapproval of the Congregation, felt it like a horrified tingle down my spine.
My brother’s cock was fucking hard as a rock, his breathing catching now, loud and heavy in his throat.
This was not how a whore was supposed to receive Spiritual Guidance
I felt so fucking frightened there were trickles of sweat going down the back of my neck, dripping down my sides.
Was there any point in pretending he was hurting me?
Not with how light his blows sounded, how they barely touched my ass with little barely-there pops.
And before I knew it, my panties were up covering my wet pussy and he sat me up, dragging my cunt across his thigh.
“Wil you do better about memorizing more of the Holy Words?” he asked, and I nodded.
Then he set me on my feet and stood up, his huge hard cock extremely visible in his khaki work pants.
“You may return to your place,” the Prophet said, but he darted another glance at me, his piggy eyes narrowing as he stroked his straggly yellow-gray beard.
This wasn’t over
After we had been dismissed, Rhyder’s hand was on the back of my neck, guiding me with firm pressure outside the circle, away from the staring eyes and hard looks.
But when he flipped me around and pressed me up against a thick tree just outside the camp, his impatient fingers lifting up both edges of my skirt, I saw Generosity’s face over his shoulder.
Her eyes burned into mine, her lips curving downward in an angry, jealous frown.
Rhyder had never given even the slightest shit about her.
My stomach wrenched. I remembered it so well.
Generosity had always been the prettiest girl in our Congregation, and as such, she clearly believed Rhyder was her birthright.
Health and fitness was prized in our Congregation, and she was strong and hearty, while I was small and weak.
I remembered one time we had all been fishing on the banks, my knees almost knocking together with the spring chill, shivering as my heavy wet skirt dragged me down. We couldn’t hitch our long dresses up because it would be immodest to.
Generosity was strong and quick, scooping up so many fish in her basket, while my frigid fingers seemed to slip past every fish.
She and her friend Prepared snickered at me.
“How many have you gotten, Temperance?”
My shoulders slumped as I looked at the one measly grandfatherly fish I had managed to catch.
I knew I was a drag on the Congregation
Tears gathered at the corner of my eyes.
Why was I always so weak and small? Why had the Allfather given me the smallest portion?
“You will have to do penance,” Generosity sing-songed to me, her pretty mouth set in a triumphant pout.
I craved being her friend so badly, but she never once would let me in.
“I am trying,” I said.
“Maybe you’ll get left behind with our next move,” Generosity said, her eyes sparkling with malice.
Occasionally, if we had to move camp in haste due to territorial disputes with other Congregations, elderly or disabled Congregants would get left behind, to crawl away if they could, but most likely to be caught and killed by whatever Congregation was driving us out of our land.
My face flamed with shame and embarrassment, everyone looking at me and knowing how weak I was.
And then my brother was there, dropping his fish into my basket so it was filled to the brim.
“ She will never be left behind,” Rhyder said angrily. “You don’t have to worry, Temperance. You will alway s have me to take care of you.”
Rhyder’s white shirt was wet, stretched across his broad chest, his golden hair shining in the spring sunlight. I saw Generosity swallow as she saw him. I knew the girls my age all thought he was the handsomest and wanted him to Climb for them.
But, as usual, he didn’t have eyes for any of them. Only for me.
With one big hand, he grabbed me and lifted me dripping out of the water.
“Good job,” he said, his eyes warm as he looked at me.
My teeth were chattering so I couldn’t have responded even if I wanted to.
But I could have said:
No, I didn’t do a good job
You don’t see me correctly
I’m your blind spot
Everybody else gets your unflinching zealous piety
I get your only mercy
And I knew when Generosity turned burning eyes to me that she hated me because of my brother. She wanted him badly but he didn’t want her.
Only me.
I wanted to scream at her, “ you think I haven’t tried to change his mind?”
At that moment I thought I’d give anything for my brother to be like the other men in the Congregation, or even to love Generosity to she wouldn’t hate me.
But he never would.
Generosity turned aside with a bitter frown as Rhyder plunged his cock inside me, his lips already insistently searching for mine.
“How beautiful you looked with my hand on your ass,” he groaned loudly. “Prettiest thing I’ve ever seen is my handprint there. God, I just want to tear into you, sister.”
He was taking me hard and fast, each thrust grinding me against the hard bark of the tree, each stroke accompanied with his loud, triumphant voice calling out his lust and his love.
And he couldn’t let me just be taken anymore. Not now that he knew all my dirty, depraved secrets. Like that there was a straining, thirsty place he could rub and suck and get exactly what he wanted from my body.
He reached between our sweaty, slick flesh and pressed, his big fingers unerring, the pressure a seductive insistence, until my thighs trembled and I dug my nails into his massive arms. And only then did he pour his hot, wicked lust into me.
Afterwards, I was heading back to the house with a handkerchief full of savory tea leaves, when I passed by the house where the concubines were staying. Eli and another man I didn’t recognize were taking Norah. I wanted to avert my eyes, my gut sinking.
Abel had her mouth and Eli her asshole, and her eyes met mine, the tears leaking out of them.
I felt tears blurring my vision, too, and the bile rose in my throat. I wanted to run away but Eli had met my eyes and suddenly I couldn’t move.
If it wasn’t for Rhyder, this would have been me.
Eli released in her asshole, his eyes still glued to mine.
He spat on the ground when he was done.
Abel pulled out of her, then the men passed a leaf back and forth as Norah was still on her hands and knees throwing up on the ground.
Eli pissed on the ground, not bothering to turn away from Norah to do it, the yellow drops splashing up on her face.
I felt like the lowest coward to just walk past her, but what else could I do?
Generosity’s eyes were on me as I reached the house. My stomach upended, and I turned quickly to throw up into the spare bushes.
I had barely wiped my mouth when she was on me, grabbing my chin, nails digging into my face.
“That should be you,” she said. “That’s all you’re good for anymore, Temperance. Licking up piss from the ground. And when Rhyder gets bored of you, I’ll make sure that’s what you get.”