Chapter 21
The flicker of doubt in Brittany’s blue eyes gave Trent a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. “Did you pick the wrong guy? Is that what you’re thinking?”
“No. I picked the right guy. I wouldn’t want someone who’d give up custody because he has no interest in being a parent. You were unhappy about losing that dream. That’s one of the reasons I asked you to do this.”
“Do you wish we weren’t so attracted to each other?”
“Yes! Except not really, because I wouldn’t give up that experience of creating our baby for anything.”
“Then you don’t regret choosing me?”
“Not for a second.”
A weight lifted off his chest. “Good. Despite my whining, I don’t regret saying yes. I’m excited about our daughter. I stopped at the Baby Barn this afternoon after lunch.”
“And?”
“I bought a teddy bear. I know it’s a cliché, but it’s also an Armstrong family tradition. The minute Mom was pregnant, Dad went out and bought a teddy bear.”
“That’s adorable. So where is this teddy bear you bought?”
“In my bedroom closet.” He grinned. “Remind me to show it to you.”
“You’re bad.”
“Hey, you started the closet fantasy. I had nothing to do with that. Besides, I wasn’t about to leave it out with Angie and Dallas here. Especially Dallas. He already thinks I’m insane.”
“How about Angie?” She gave a slight push with her foot and the swing began gently moving back and forth. “Does she disapprove?”
“I think she’s reserving judgment.” He liked seeing her in that swing. He’d only had it up a week.
“That’s what I’m getting, too. If she had major objections, you’d have heard them by now. I’m glad she’s going with me over to her mom’s.”
“I would’ve gone if you’d needed me to.”
“I know.” She gave the swing another nudge. “You’re very brave.”
He chuckled. “Not really. I’m glad Angie nixed the idea of me going. I was sitting there hoping I wouldn’t have to gear up for it.”
“Which reminds me. When you suggested coming out on the porch, you told Angie and Dallas you wanted to talk to me before I left to see Desiree. What did you mean?”
“Nothing. It was just an excuse to get you alone and test myself. Or I should say semi-alone. I’m not going to pounce on you when they’re on the other side of that door.”
“But you would if they weren’t here?” She dragged her foot, slowing the swing’s motion.
“No.” He kept eye contact as he tried to gauge her ever-shifting mood. “Well, I say that, but I’d have a tough time resisting the urge if you had your pounce-on-me expression on your face.”
“I have an expression like that?”
“Uh-huh. That’s exactly how you looked at me this morning.” A moment that would live forever in his heart.
And now the flicker of doubt was back in her eyes.
He took a deep breath. Might as well find out where it came from. “But it’s not how you’re looking at me now. What’s wrong? You said you don’t regret choosing me, but you’re upset. Is it this pesky attraction situation? We’ll deal with it. We’ll?—”
“You’re suffering.” She held the swing stationary. “I hate that.”
“Suffering? No. Frustrated? Sure, but I’m not?—”
“I call it suffering. I invited you into my bed and you had a great time, and then?—”
“We had a great time.”
“Okay, we did. But I’m talking about you right now. You had every right to believe this project would last at least several days. I think I even mentioned this week was my fertile time.”
“You did.” And he had figured on a longer time span.
“Yet only hours after we started, we’re done.”
“Mostly because of my oversized ego. You dreamed I was a knight on a horse and that played right into my need to be your hero.”
“You were my hero. And your reward is constant frustration, aka suffering. What’s good about that?”
“My reward is taking satisfaction in a job well done. We made a baby girl. That was our goal and we accomplished it.”
“But then what? Your engines were running full out and then we abruptly ended the operation.”
“It’s what we agreed to. What I agreed to.” Then the light dawned. He might want to shut the heck up and listen to the subtext of her argument. He wasn’t the only frustrated person on this porch.
“I admire you for sticking with the plan even when it didn’t work out the way you expected. That shows character.”
“Thank you.” Was she talking herself into a renegotiation? One he’d be very happy about? His body began to hum.
“I still believe we should avoid a romantic relationship.”
But was something else still on the table? He cleared the sudden attack of lust from his throat. “As I told your mom, I don’t believe in romance anymore.” Her mom hadn’t liked hearing that, but Brittany had given him a subtle thumbs up for that comment.
“I’m not sure I ever did believe in it. Maybe when I was younger, when I was into fairy princesses, but by the time I was ten or so, I was over it.”
“Took me a little longer.”
“But the scales have fallen from your eyes?”
“Scales, rose petals, whatever was blocking my view.”
“And these sparks my mom’s referring to, they have nothing to do with romance, right?”
“Nothing whatsoever.” He liked where this discussion was going. So did his randy body.
“Even though we’ve used the term making love instead of having sex?”
“I understand what you’re saying. The thing is, when we decided to create this baby, we didn’t just have sex. It was more meaningful than that.” And the video of their last encounter was rolling in his head.
“I agree.”
“But I wouldn’t call it romantic, either. It was more… elemental.” The possibility of an alternate ending to the evening sent heat to his groin and emptied his lungs.
“Elemental. I like that description.”
Her low, sensual murmur didn’t help his condition. The light was low out here. He had trouble reading her expression to gauge her mood. But it wasn’t that low, and any second now she’d know exactly what he was thinking.
He pushed away from the railing. “But it was more than that.” Walking toward the steps, he gripped the nearest post and kept his back to her. “And it seems I’ve failed this test. I want you so much right now I can’t see straight.”
“That’s what I mean. You’re suffering.”
“But you’re not?”
“If I am, it’s my own fault. I’m the one who got us into this. You would have been content with a one-night stand.”
He snorted. “Content isn’t the word I would have chosen. That lollapalooza of a kiss in the truck gave me a hint I’d get more than I’d bargained for. I knew I’d be asking for an extension on our one-night agreement.”
“I had the exact same thought. My body was shouting Hallelujah. Let the games begin.”
He chuckled. “Yeah. I could tell.”
She fell silent for a moment. “So here we are.”
“Here we are.” Thanks to the rapidly dropping temperature, he’d had some success cooling off his equipment, but he decided to keep his back to her in case she was about to say something that would start the process all over again.
“I think it’s time to face facts.”
“Which ones?”
“The most obvious and immediate. This red-hot?—”
The sound of knocking ended whatever she was about to say. He turned, thinking she’d made that noise, but no, someone was knocking on the door from the inside. What the hell?
The door opened a crack. “Everybody decent?”
It was Angie giving them a courtesy knock.
Brittany laughed. “Of course we’re decent. It’s cold out here.”
“That never stopped me.” She poked her head out. “We finished eating and we — hey, are you two arguing?”
“Not at all.” He managed to sound normal. “Just discussing something.” And she’d interrupted at a critical moment.
Maybe just as well. Whatever was going on with Brittany, she wasn’t totally committed one way or the other. Her comment that they had to face facts was prefaced by I think.
Did he want her to change her mind about how they’d conduct this relationship? His body shouted yes but his cautious heart had reservations. That said, if she invited him back into her bed, he’d jump at the chance. And deal with the fallout later.