Chapter 18
EIGHTEEN
JESSE
Roman has been in the principal’s office for twenty minutes. Probably the longest twenty minutes in the history of the world.
The earlier scene keeps replaying in my head non-stop—Roman throwing punch after punch at those two guys, barely flinching when some of their hits landed on him.
I ran to his side the moment the initial shock wore off, but even then, he was so focused it took me calling his name several times to get him to stop.
God, when he turned and looked at me…
My hands are still shaking, my palms sweating around the straps of both his bag and mine on my shoulders. My stomach is still rolling with nausea when I remember the first signs of bruising on his face before he disappeared into that office.
I can’t stop pacing outside, my head running round and round in circles, my breathing and pulse out of control as I try in vain to make sense of what happened. As I try to understand what would make someone who’s always so gentle with me snap like that.
My gaze flies up as the door suddenly opens, and Roman exits the office.
His eyes fall on me, waiting for him right outside, and when he steps closer, he wordlessly slips his bag off my shoulder.
My heart beats like mad in my chest looking at his injured face, wanting to ask and do so many things at the same time, but instead just staring up at him, trying to swallow through the lump in my throat.
Something flashes in the look he gives me, but it’s quickly gone.
His hand comes up to tug at the end of my ponytail in the way he usually does, but this time it’s impossible to smile when I have no idea what the fuck is going on.
“Let’s go home, Blue,” he simply says, and I find myself walking next to him towards the car.
By the time we arrive home, I’m not just confused and worried, but also pissed off.
“What was that, Ro?” I ask when we’re in his room, surprised to find my voice calm and steady despite the emotions raging inside me.
His eyes bore into mine with an intensity that sucks the oxygen out of the room. His expression hardens before he severs our connection, going to sit in his desk chair. His eyes turn to stare somewhere outside the window, and something squeezes in my chest when I realize he’s not answering.
“Roman?”
His body tenses, his hands clenching into fists on his thighs.
Fuck, why – why isn’t he answering me?
Why isn’t he looking at me?
I swallow before his name slips out again.
“Ro—"
“They were talking shit about you.”
My eyebrows climb so far up my forehead, they probably disappear into my hairline.
I stand there frozen, looking at him like an idiot while he’s still looking away.
“What did you say?”
His jaw pops from how hard he’s clenching it, before our eyes meet and lock again.
“You heard me.”
My pulse thunders on the side of my neck as I move closer to him, only stopping when my legs bump against his knees, and he’s the one who has to look up.
“What kind of shit?” I mumble, my hands lifting to frame his beautiful face gingerly, careful not to touch his split lip and busted eyebrow.
Unnamed emotions burn in his dark eyes, as they travel all over my face, my hair, dipping down to my sweater, before piercing me again.
And for some reason, I understand even though he’s said nothing. I know what kind of shit he heard. The kind of shit I’ve heard enough times to know exactly what he’s talking about.
A shallow breath stutters out of me as I nod.
“Why did you tear into them, Ro?” I whisper, my fingers feathering over the places he’s hurt. “Why would you risk hurting yourself?”
His hands come up, gripping my hips tightly, his fingers digging into my hipbones, bunching up the material of my long sweater. It only takes one small tug and I’m on his lap, peering into him, being swallowed up in the dark, obsessive glint I see in his gaze.
The one that never fails to make me tremble.
“You know why, Blue,” he says in a low, raspy voice.
“Tell me,” I demand, and his hold becomes tighter, his body vibrating with barely-controlled restraint under mine.
“I don’t give a shit about what others might say about me, but you’re different. You’re special. Whoever fucks with you, fucks with me, Blue. And they get what they deserve.”
My heart aches at his words.
God, how can hearing something like this send warmth to my entire body and make me fucking melt, while at the same time making me so mad I see red?
My fingers slide into his hair which I fist hard enough to make him growl low in his throat.
“Not at your expense, Roman. Not if it means you facing the consequences or getting yourself hurt.” My breathing gets choppy and shallow, and I can feel the way his mirrors mine. “Do you know what it’s like watching you get hurt?”
“Do you know what it’s like hearing someone talk about you like you’re just a hole to fuck?”
His words stun me so bad I can only blink at him, my mouth opening and closing uselessly.
Roman’s expression softens imperceptibly, his arms snaking around me to embrace me fully, even though I can still feel the tension riding him hard.
“Don’t ask me to just stand there and do nothing because I can’t do that. Not when it comes to you,” he states in a hoarse whisper that resonates inside my chest. “You’re more important, little bird.”
Fuck, what am I supposed to say to that?
How am I supposed to even breathe after that?
“Damn you, Roman,” I mumble, pressing my forehead gently against his. “Damn you for making it impossible for me to stay mad at you.”
A small chuckle escapes him, but he immediately sucks in a breath. I pull back enough to look at him, eyeing the cut on his lip.
“Does it hurt a lot?”
His eyes are twinkling when he answers.
“Terribly.”
Roman being playful after getting bruised and battered for my sake might very well be my downfall.
“Is that right?” I play along, keeping a straight face.
“Mhm.”
“Is this the part where you tell me to kiss it better?”
“I mean, I wouldn’t stop you if you wanted to.”
I shake my head in mock exasperation, leaning forward to suck gently on his bottom lip. His arms tighten around my waist because I’m sure it must sting as hell, but his eyes have turned liquid when I pull back.
“Thank you for standing up for me, Ro,” I mumble softly, pressing another kiss against his lips, unable to resist. “But you’re wrong, you know.”
His brow furrows, his expression puzzled.
“You’re just as important to me. Never forget that.”
He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t react, doesn’t move. I don’t think he’s even breathing.
So when he rests his forehead on my shoulder and buries his face in my neck, holding me as if I’m the most precious thing in the world, I do the same, holding him to me so tightly I wish I could meld us together.
I don’t know how long we stay like that. It could have been minutes or hours and I wouldn’t have noticed.
It’s only when I murmur in his ear to let me get him some things to take care of him that he releases me.
I’m back in minutes, armed with an ice pack wrapped in a towel, and the first-aid kit from the bathroom.
“Hold this,” I tell him, slapping the ice pack with a little more force than necessary on his temple and eyebrow, and making him keep it there.
Clearly, there’s still a teeny, tiny smidge of anger left in me for getting himself hurt, my nostrils flaring when I take a better look at the state of his knuckles.
“I’m fine, Blue. I don’t need any of this.” He goes to remove the ice pack, but stops when he meets my narrowed eyes.
“If you touch that, I will hurt you even more.”
His eyes widen slightly in surprise, before amusement takes over.
And is that… heat?
“You’re a violent, little thing deep down, aren’t you?”
“I am.” I take his hand in mine, applying the disinfectant. “So you’d better not test me.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it, Blue.”
He follows everything I do closely, almost greedily.
He grumbles, but I can tell he loves the attention.
He loves that I’m taking care of him, that I’m focused only on him.
He lets me do whatever I want and doesn’t stop me again, so when I dip down to brush my lips against the uninjured corner of his mouth, the words just slip out.
“Good boy.”
The dangerous glint in his dark gaze shoots an addictive thrill through my veins.
“You can’t say shit like that to me, Jesse,” he says in a low voice.
“Because you like it?”
“Because I love it.”
Fuck, the way he’s staring up at me right now makes me weak.
“You love hearing how good you were, defending me today?” I mutter, leaving everything I’m holding blindly on his desk, while the ice pack slips from his hand to the floor. He breathes in shakily when I feather my fingers over his lips. “How good you made me feel in the car this morning?”
“Blue…” he says in a hoarse whisper, swallowing thickly when I thread my fingers through his hair next, and run them through it softly but firmly, wanting him to feel it.
“Because you did, Ro. You made me feel so good I couldn’t stop thinking about it all day during school.
” A shiver runs through me at the memory of his mouth on me, of his fingers working my spot ruthlessly, how he took me apart in mere minutes, how perfect it felt as devastating pleasure crushed through me.
“Yeah?” he breathes out and I feel his hands grasping the back of my thighs.
“I fucking thanked you, Roman.”
It takes us exactly two seconds for both of us to smile like idiots just remembering what I blurted out after he sucked me off.
But the tension only gets thicker when neither of us looks away, my heart racing with nervousness and anticipation at what I’m about to do.
“You remember what I told you before I got out of the car?”
His grip on my thighs tightens as his eyes flash with realization.
And slowly nods.
“Then show me.”
I could burn into the blazing darkness of his gaze.
“On your knees, angel.”
It’s like my body was waiting for his soft command, my legs folding until I’m kneeling between his spread thighs.