Chapter 25 Violet
Violet
It felt good to finally get out of the house again.
Aside from Colt taking me to a doctor’s appointment earlier in the week, I’d been staying home, trapped in my own mind.
As much as I tried to focus on how amazing our afternoon of unexpected delights was, I couldn’t get past the fear simmering underneath my skin.
He was here. Watching me. Waiting.
I couldn’t figure out how he knew to come to Silver Springs. There wasn’t a logical explanation for it. But every time I started to think about it, I could feel my anxiety wrapping its sticky tentacles around my heart.
I blew out a sharp breath as Hayes turned the corner onto Cherry Street.
“You okay?” he asked, his eyes darting over to me before they made their way back to the road.
“Yeah, of course. Just thinking about how nice it is to get out of the house. Sorry you’re stuck carting me around, though.”
“It’s no problem.” He flipped on the turn signal and we pulled into the parking lot.
“Wasn’t that Mr. Hennigan’s barber shop?” I asked.
“Yeah. He died maybe five years ago? I think it sat empty until last year when this bookshop opened.”
Part of me expected to come back and still see the town I grew up in completely unchanged. But that seemed like a silly notion, especially when I was coming back as a different person.
The bookshop was absolutely adorable. A smaller store, brick front and a super cute sign out front. Reminded me of my neighborhood bookstore back in New York. Hayes held open the door for me, and we walked inside.
“How long does something like this normally take?” Hayes asked, his eyes roaming over the rows of books in front of us.
“Jessie said they’d stocked a few different books of mine. It shouldn’t be too long. I just want to make sure I can sign them all. I never imagined Silver Springs would have a bookstore that wanted to stock my stories, you know?”
“Hi there, welcome to Romantically Yours,” a woman, probably in her late twenties or early thirties, greeted us. “I’m Maggie. Can I help you find something specific today?”
“Actually, yes,” I answered. “My name is Callie Ford, and my friend Jessie mentioned that some of my books were stocked here. I was hoping you wouldn’t mind if I signed them?”
Her whole face lit up. “Of course! Oh, that would be amazing. Let me see…” She walked out from behind the counter. “We’ve got your books right here, on our local authors display.”
Maggie was kind enough to direct us to a table next to the display which had two plush seats flanking it. Perfect. As much as I was happy to get out of the house for something other than a doctor’s appointment, my back was in knots and I was exhausted just from the walk into the shop.
Hayes picked up a book from the first stack on the table and turned to me, a big goofy grin plastered on his face.
“I think this one was my favorite of what you’ve written so far, but I’m excited for Daphne and Jack’s story. You think you’ll be finishing it up soon? Or…probably next year, right? With the baby and all…”
I stared at Hayes. And then I blinked, trying to focus on the book in his hand. Over the Sunlit Hills. I’d definitely written that. My pen name was in big, bold letters across the front of it.
“Sorry. Did you just say the book you’re holding right now in your hands was your favorite of the ones I’ve written? As in, you’ve not only read that book, but you’ve also read the others?”
He chuckled. “Of course I have. Colt made us. There’s a separate group chat that resurrects every time a new Callie Ford book comes out.”
“Who’s in the group chat?” I squeaked. My throat was suddenly very dry. A whole ass group chat about my books? Between members of the Ford family? I officially wanted to melt into the floor.
“All of us. I mean, not Dad. But Ma, Jessie, Colt, Me, Beau, and Lachlan.”
I groaned. “No.”
“Oh yeah. Colt told us all we weren’t allowed to read the spicy scenes because it was ‘like seeing Violet naked’ and he was the only one allowed to do that, but—”
“Do NOT finish that sentence.”
“Fine, fine.” He held up his hands next to his face and smiled. “I’ll just say, thank you for writing that one scene where Amelia and Grant are out in the field and she—”
“Hayes!”
“What? It’s a great scene. I’m thinking of using it when I find my girl one day.”
“Just take a picnic blanket with you. Those two didn’t end up with friction burns from what they were doing, because I didn’t want to write that into the story. But in real life, that could have been very painful.”
He lifted his hand and mimed writing in a note book. “Got it. No. Friction. Burns.” He closed the imaginary notebook and slid it into an imaginary pocket on his chest.
“I now need to forget that everyone in the family has probably read that scene. Oh God,” I groaned. “Hand me that pile of books and change the subject, quick.”
Hayes passed a stack of five or six books my way.
“What do you want to talk about?” he asked.
“Anything except me. How’s everything at the fire house?” My marker glided smoothly across the title page of my book as I asked.
“Good. We eat a lot. Shoot the shit. Occasionally have a call to pull a cat out of a tree or walk an old lady across the road.”
I laughed. “Sounds like a good time.”
“It is. I know Ma wishes I had chosen a different career, but I just couldn’t resist the adrenaline. It’s addictive.”
I raised my eyebrow. “And it’s nice to help your community.”
“Oh, yeah. That too.”
“Alright, hotshot. So you save kittens and help old ladies. Have you had to deliver a baby?”
Hayes’ eyes went wide. “Why? Are you having contractions? I can get us to the hospital, just don’t push!”
I laughed so hard tears pricked the corner of my eyes, and I had to hold the side of my belly.
“No, my God. But your instant panic was hilarious to watch. I was just trying to see if you’d be any help if I went into labor on the ranch.
My due date is only two weeks away, and my new doctor mentioned I might not make it there.
But I’m guessing you won’t be any help.”
Hayes shook his head as he pressed the heel of his hand into his chest. “Christ, Vee. No. I mean, I could help. I’m a great driver. But that’s all Colt. He’s in the backseat with you.”
Now I was really surprised. “He’s delivered a baby before?”
Hayes nodded. “A few years back. Stranded motorist. I don’t think he would have said anything, but I was at the station and heard him make the call for the ambulance.”
He’d delivered a baby. I couldn’t wrap my mind around the emotional toll that must have taken on him. Guilt washed over me. I should have been there. For him to come home to. For him to have someone to talk to about it.
I had thought, for all these years, I was saving him from needless pain. But instead I’d caused so much of it. He didn’t move on like I thought he would. Colt lived a life absent of the love and support a partner should offer him. All because he was waiting for me to come back.
Hayes took his phone out, but I didn’t pay attention to what he was doing at first. I just figured he was letting Colt know everything was still fine and we’d be heading home soon. But when I looked up to swap books, I saw the phone directed at me.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
“Colt would want to see this! You signing your books…it’s bad ass.” I smiled and he nodded, tucking the phone back in his pocket. I turned back to the last three books I wanted to sign. “I’m proud of you.”
His whispered words hit me right in the heart.
“I’m proud of you, too. Silver Springs is lucky to have you to run to the rescue. Can’t say I love the idea of my brother running into a burning building. That definitely hasn’t changed since I left.”
“Your brother, huh?”
“You guys, and Jessie, will always be my brothers and sister. You know…” I looked back at the page in front of me.
What I was about to admit was too emotional.
Too vulnerable. “I tried to push this all away. I did push all of you away. But I never stopped caring, or loving you guys. I read every edition of the Silver Springs Times. I would search your names to make sure everyone was still okay. When Lach…” My voice hitched.
When Lachlan had been hurt, it nearly killed me to stay away.
The only thing that stopped me from running right back was Jessie keeping me in the loop with his prognosis and recovery.
“Vee.”
“I know it’s not the same. Beau told me what happened to Colt after I left. That he wasn’t okay.”
A tear slipped down my cheek before I could swipe it away. Hayes’ eyes went wide. “Don’t cry.”
“I thought I was doing the right thing. But I messed it all up, didn’t I?”
“I’m sure what I’m about to say is exactly what Colt has probably told you a hundred times since you came back.
You did what you had to so that you could survive.
You gave Colt the chance to move on and be happy with someone else.
But the thing is, Vi…if you’d stopped to ask anyone in his life, if you’d stopped to really think about it, Colt was never going to fall in love with anyone else. ”
“I just didn’t want to hold him back.”
Hayes’ hand landed on my arm. “You both could have handled things differently. And if you’re feeling regret now for the decisions you made, it seems like you’ve been given the perfect chance to handle things differently this time. To trust Colt when he tells you how he feels, or what he wants.”
I nodded, my eyes dropping back to the last few books sitting in front of me unsigned. I went back to work, numb as I signed them, thinking over what Hayes had just said. A minute later, when I’d finished and stood up from the chair ready to go, I noticed Hayes hadn’t moved.
“What’s the matter?” I asked.
“I don’t like this sign. It feels like it’s asking for trouble.” His eyes were locked on the sign announcing the books featured on that table were by local authors.
The breeze from the shop’s door opening only fueled the chill that was settling in my bones.
“He already knows where I am, Hayes. He could decide to escalate things at any point. A little sign in a bookshop saying I’m local being removed isn’t going to protect me.”
“Apple-anche?” I turned to see Nate strolling towards us. “Long time no see.”
I smiled, wondering what the hell he was doing in a book store in the middle of the day. “God. I owe you the biggest apology.”
Hayes held out his hand. “Nate.”
“Hey, Hayes. Heard you guys think we might have a firebug on our hands?”
“Yep.” Hayes slid his hands back into his pockets. “That old warehouse on Wickham Road went up last week. And three weeks ago the same thing happened to an abandoned place near Lark Lake we got called to assist with. Seems like someone is setting them on purpose.”
“Well, you know we’ll help out however we can.”
“Appreciate it. Violet, I’m going to talk to Maggie about that sign. At the very least they can move your books out of the display window.”
“Oh sure, Hayes. I don’t want to be in the best spot in the store, or have my books noticed right as customers come in.” I rolled my eyes. “It’s fine.”
“I’m talking to her. Don’t try to slip out of the shop without me.”
Nate laughed. “So I’m not the only one you give a hard time to?”
“No. Of course not. But I do really want to say I’m sorry for everything that happened. I told Colt under no circumstances are you to be punished for my choices as a grown, independent woman.”
“How did he take that?”
“He growled something about me being his wife and needing to keep me safe, but I reminded him you did just that.”
“Colt’s been absolutely fine, you have nothing to worry about. I’m not in trouble.”
“So you just happen to have the day off today?” I looked him up and down. He very clearly was not on official duty in jeans and a hoodie.
“Yep. Scheduled weeks ago and everything. I promise it’s all good. My girlfriend put an order in and asked if I could swing by to pick it up after I got done working out. So, here I am.”
“That’s nice of you.”
He shrugged. “Seems like pretty basic boyfriend duty stuff to me.” His eyes went to the table behind me. “Are those your books?”
I felt the heat immediately in my cheeks. “Oh, yeah. They just got some copies in. I was signing them.”
“Signed copies! Count me in.” He strolled past me and picked up one of each book.
“No! You don’t have to buy them. I’d give a set to you…or your girlfriend. I mean, she’s probably the one reading romance, right?”
“Actually, I read all the same books she does. It’s like a road map to how she loves and wants to be loved.”
Alright. I was actually going to swoon from how precious that was. “You’re a real catch, Nate. She’s lucky to have found you.”
“Nah. I’m the lucky one.”
“Don’t let Colt catch you calling him a catch, Vi. He’ll exile the poor guy to patrol the quarries.”
Nate shivered. “Those places always give me the creeps.”
“You ready to go?” Hayes asked, turning towards me.
“Yeah. Thanks for supporting a local artist,” I joked.
“Are you kidding me? I’m excited to read these. Come visit the station again soon so I can share my thoughts.”
I waved over my shoulder as Hayes and I left the store.