Chapter 25 Cosi
Cosi
Ilsa yelped as she crashed into me and pitched backward, about to tumble into the snow, but I caught her by the arms, keeping her from falling on her ass.
“Ilsa, what the fuck are you—”
“Cosi.” A sob broke free as she clung to me, burying her face in my chest.
My arms wrapped around her automatically, holding her tight. The irritation and worry that she was out here alone, that I’d gone into the cabin and couldn’t find her, vanished in a blink.
Instead, all I felt was fear.
Her entire body was trembling as she fisted the front of my coat, like she was afraid I’d let her go—I wouldn’t.
“Breathe, baby. I’ve got you.”
She sucked in a jagged inhale, the air catching in her throat. But aside from that one cry, she kept it together, holding tight to me as she calmed down.
I pressed my lips to her hair, smelling her shampoo and the winter cold. The strands at her temples were damp with sweat, but her coat was cold, the fabric stiff. How long had she been out here? Why was she coming off the lake?
A pop came from behind us and Ilsa’s entire body jerked, her hold on me tightening.
“It’s just Spencer,” I said.
My stubborn, stubborn son had insisted on coming along when I’d told him I was driving out here to get Ilsa.
He was worried I wouldn’t be able to convince her on my own—he was probably right to worry.
That kid was too damn perceptive for his own good and knew it had been a tense few days.
I’d decided it was safe enough for him to come along, and I could use his help with cleanup.
“I sent him off to do some target practice with his pistol so we could talk alone.” Except she’d been nowhere to be found until I’d spotted the tracks in the yard and followed them toward the lake. “What were you doing out there?”
She eased her face away to look up at me, but the grip she had on my coat didn’t loosen. Another gunshot rang out and she nearly jumped out of her skin.
I lifted my fingers to my lips, turned over my shoulder and let out a piercing whistle.
Spencer knew when he heard that whistle to come back.
“Just relax,” I told her, running my hands up and down her arms.
“Shit.” She sighed, closing her eyes for a moment. “Sorry.”
“Talk to me. What’s going on?”
When she looked at me, the fear in her gaze was enough to make my stomach drop. “I was cleaning and came outside with some trash. I saw a plume of smoke across the lake and thought it was Dad’s friend Jerry. So I went to try and find him.”
“Where?” I tucked her into my side and walked us to the shore. “Show me?”
She pointed to the other side of the lake. “There.”
I narrowed my eyes, trying to make out smoke, but all I saw were snow, trees and blue sky. “I’m not seeing it.”
“It’s gone now.” She slumped, bringing her hands to her mouth to blow hot air on them. Her knuckles were practically blue from the cold. Where were her gloves?
I took her hands, putting them palm to palm, then covered them with my own, slowly rubbing back and forth, building some friction and warmth.
“It was there. I swear,” she said, eyes pleading for me to believe her. “And I found a cabin.”
“I believe you.”
Her face crumpled, like this time she really was going to cry. And when she fell into me again, her forehead resting over my heart, I let go of her hands and wrapped her up again.
Over her head, I stared across the lake, hoping I’d find that plume of smoke.
“Dad,” Spencer called.
I turned, keeping Ilsa against me, as Spencer rounded the side of the cabin.
“Head on inside, pal,” I told him. “We’ll be in soon.”
He gave me a single nod, concern clouding his expression, before he ducked into the cabin.
“Tell me about Jerry again,” I said.
She turned her face so she could talk but not move away. “He gave me the short letter. The one about the tap dance. And he said Dad wouldn’t have drowned. That it wasn’t an accident.”
“You’re sure he said his name was Jerry.” I’d asked her this already but wanted to hear the answer again.
“Yes.”
Then he must have lied. “And he came to you from across the lake?”
“From the island. At least that’s where he walked to after he gave me that letter. I didn’t notice where he came from before that. He just sort of . . . appeared. And I know how that sounds and that this all seems like some big, fabricated mess that I’m making up in—”
I pressed my finger to her lips. “Ilsa, I’m not asking because I don’t believe you. I just want to make sure I’ve got the details right.”
Relief filled those beautiful brown eyes. “Thank you.”
“But do me a favor? Don’t walk across the lake again.”
The little color remaining in her cheeks blanched. “Why? Is it unsafe?”
“Considering how cold it’s been this winter, it’s probably fine. But there’s always the chance of weak points, and I don’t want you out there, especially alone.”
The idea of her falling through the ice, of getting hypothermia or drowning, made my blood run cold.
It must have hers too because she shivered, head to toe.
“You said you found a cabin over there?” As far as I knew, there weren’t buildings on that side of the lake. But I guess I was wrong.
“Yes. It’s small, more like a hut. Almost the size of Dad’s shed. There were footprints in the snow, and I knocked, but no one answered. And . . .” She shivered again as she trailed off.
“And what?”
“I got the feeling that I was being watched. Like they saw me coming and left.”
Whoever this Jerry was, he didn’t want to be found. But he was going to have a harder time avoiding me.
He was likely long gone today. Ilsa would have scared him off.
But tomorrow, I’d come back with Larry and Chuck.
If we were lucky, Ilsa’s tracks wouldn’t get snowed over tonight and they’d be easy to follow.
But even if we had to search every square foot of land around this lake, I’d find that cabin and figure out who owned it.
“All right. Let’s get out of here. Go home. Get you warmed up.” Except when I took a step away, toward the house, she didn’t move.
“I’m staying out here. I need to come back and get my stuff, but it’s time for me to come back to the cabin.”
“No.” Fuck no.
“Cosi—”
“You told Troy you were leaving Dalton. It fucked with my head.” I took her face in my hands. “The last woman I cared about was Gwen. And she left.”
Understanding filled her eyes. So did guilt.
“When you told Troy you were leaving, it brought back a lot of shit I never dealt with. I’m sorry.
Since Gwen left town, I haven’t wanted anyone else.
I’ve avoided anything that resembled a relationship.
Until you. Any other woman, I wouldn’t have cared if she left.
But you? I don’t want you to leave. And that’s fucking with my head too. ”
Her eyes softened. “I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t know where I belong. I just know that this”—she motioned to the cabin—“is hard. Dalton is hard. Work is hard. My friendship with Troy was always hard. But when I’m with you, it’s easy. It’s so easy it terrifies me.”
I dropped my forehead to hers. “I’m in this with you, Ilsa. I don’t know how to do it any other way.”
“I’m in it too.”
I dropped my mouth to hers, kissing away the cold from her lips. Kissing away the tension and stress from the past few days. My tongue slid inside, tangling with hers, but before I could delve deep, a loud thwack sounded from the house.
Ilsa and I broke apart as Spencer marched outside with a piece of ruined furniture under each arm. He chucked them in the back of Ike’s truck, brushed his hands on his jeans, then walked back inside.
“Come on.” I held out my hand. “Come home with me.”
“Just one more night,” she said, lacing her fingers with mine.
I was getting more than one night. But we’d worry about that tomorrow.
Another crash came as Spencer yanked a mattress through the front door. He hefted it into the truck, his face hard and angry. “She can’t stay here, Dad.”
I’d warned him it wasn’t good. Now that he’d seen it for himself, it came as no surprise he was furious. Hopefully he’d cool down before he went to school on Monday. Even if he didn’t, we’d have a talk because the last thing I needed was him getting into it with Paul.
Spencer sent a glare across the yard the likes of which I’d never seen from him before. It was more man than boy. “You’re not staying here.”
Ilsa nodded. “Okay.”
“Good.” Spencer kicked a tuft of snow, then stomped into the house.
“I love that kid.” She let out a quiet laugh. “I’d better help him before he throws out something I want to keep.”
She walked ahead, clueless to the fact that she’d just snatched another piece of my heart. Another week, maybe two, she’d own the entire thing.
She couldn’t leave Dalton. I wouldn’t allow it. Whatever was making her life hard, I’d move mountains to make it easy. Starting now.
I tucked my hands into my coat pockets and headed for the house, but halfway across the yard, a prickle crept up my neck.
Slowing, I turned in a full circle.
Nothing but trees and snow.
But I’d bet my badge that someone was out there, watching.
Whoever it was, their days were numbered.
I was done with this bullshit on Cotters Lake.