Chapter 1
Bri
My stomach heaved before I even opened my eyes. The dream stuck to me, propelling me out of bed and toward the bathroom. I managed to keep the contents of my stomach intact, but I had to stand in front of the bathroom mirror for a while and focus on being calm.
Damn it. I wiped my face down with a cool washcloth and reminded myself that nobody could hurt me or my daughter here. Dad would kill anyone who stepped through the doors that he hadn’t invited.
These nightmares were exhausting me, night after night.
They were always the same. My ex-husband chasing me through an endless hallway with no help in sight.
He was furious and screaming and I knew I was about to get my ass beat, but I couldn’t run faster than him and none of the doors in the hallway opened.
Sometimes, the dream would progress to a second part where I hid, and he found me every damn time.
Tonight, I’d woken up before it got to that. That was always worse, him finding me.
It would take me hours to fall back asleep, then I’d be crabby in the morning. I hated feeling grumpy around my daughter. She deserved sunshine as often as I could give it to her.
When my heart calmed down to its normal pattern, I climbed back in the bed and tried to think of anything but my ex-husband.
Of course, that didn’t work. I’d thought about him every day for years.
Even though I’d escaped him, there was no escaping him in my mind, no matter how hard I tried. He was always there.
Lately, things had been going well. I’d gotten settled in a new town, teaching at a new school.
I’d made friends, even. And then, Damon had cornered me outside of my new favorite spot for girls’ night.
I wasn’t sure how he’d found me, but he’d scared the shit out of me, and I hadn’t been able to shake it even though we’d been staying with my parents since then.
But staying here forever wasn’t an option.
I wanted to get back to my life. With a sigh, I covered up, then had to kick the blankets off.
The nightmare had put me into a sweat and the blankets were too much.
March was still pretty cold in Maine, so my parents had the heat on.
Restless, I grabbed my phone to play a mindless game for a little while.
Maybe it would help my eyes get sleepy and I could drop off.
I’d give it another few days here before going back to my place.
If I hadn’t heard from Damon by midweek, I’d go back home with Hayden.
She was almost seven, and I didn’t want her to start questioning why our lives were being uprooted again.
If possible, I hoped to resolve this without it disrupting her life any more than this little bit from staying here.
I was just lucky my parents had been able to buy a house with extra rooms. I didn’t like to think that they’d expected this to happen, and my daughter and I would move back in with them, but they liked to think ahead. They’d probably anticipated it, or the possibility of it, anyway.
Whatever I decided to do, I wouldn’t let Damon interfere in our lives again. I couldn’t and I wouldn’t. No matter what it took, I wouldn’t give Hayden the childhood I’d had before Mom got remarried to my stepdad. My mind raced with possible scenarios and what I’d do about them when they happened.
As I expected, it took me hours to get to sleep. When I woke again, the alarm was on its third round of snoozing. I’d turned it off in my sleep.
Also again.
I slipped my arms into my robe as I shuffled downstairs to find Hayden at the stove, standing on a stool as she assisted her grandmother with making pancakes. In two months, Hayden would be seven, but she had her father’s height and looked closer to eight or nine.
I smiled to myself as I watched them stir the batter and carefully spoon it onto the griddle.
Knowing that Hayden’s Nana and Papa’s house would always be a happy place for her gave me a great amount of joy.
It made me think of my childhood. Part of my early years had been pretty rough.
My biological father had treated my mother pretty badly.
I didn’t have a happy space like this until my stepfather came along.
Speaking of the man, he cleared his throat behind me. Dad was good like that. He knew that I was sensitive and easily startled, so he always announced himself gently with a heavy step or cleared throat. He wrapped an arm around me as if he knew I was thinking of him. “How’re you doing?”
This man was the only man who I considered to be my father.
He’d been in my life since I was eleven.
He was more of my dad than my biological father ever was.
Good riddance to that man. It hurt me more than I cared to admit that I’d done the same thing to my daughter, chosen a shitty sperm donor for her.
“I’m getting better. Processing everything.”
Dad moved us forward and pulled out a kitchen chair for me. “Sit. Eat. We’re in no hurry for you two to leave. Stay here as long as you’d like.”
I loved the house they’d bought in Bluewater. It definitely beat the one I rented for Hayden and me. But they were in a better position to buy than I was. I’d had to start all over when I left Damon and got nothing out of the divorce except for Hayden.
She was all I needed anyway. I didn’t want his money. His money would come with strings attached.
"Thanks, Daddy," I whispered as Hayden tried to flip a pancake.
He dropped a kiss on the top of my head before moving over to my mom and daughter, placing the same kisses on the tops of their heads. My heart ached as I found myself wishing I could find someone to love me and Hayden the way my stepdad loved my mother, as well as me and my sister, Bianca.
Speaking of Bianca, my wild sister burst through the back door, a ball of energy, with her newest boyfriend trailing not far behind.
“Hey, everyone,” she chirped. “This is Andre.” Bianca went through boyfriends like she did underwear, so I didn’t bother trying to remember the guy’s name.
I just nodded my head at him as Dad held out his hand and gave poor Andre his sternest look.
They shook and Andre tried to smile at Dad, but he wavered at the end.
Bianca pulled him toward the big breakfast table.
He sat across from me and gave me that same sweet smile. I felt a bit bad for the kid because I knew he likely wouldn’t last through the weekend. Bianca was flighty that way.
Hayden walked from the stove with a plate piled high with pancakes. I took them from her. “Grab the syrup, baby.”
She grinned and scuttled off to get it as Bianca poured juice for her and the kid.
He wisely stayed quiet while she piled up his plate.
Mom brought the rest of the breakfast. She’d been cooking every morning and Bianca had come to eat with us each time.
I knew she didn’t normally, and appreciated that she was trying to make things seem fine and dandy for Hayden.
She was flighty and too energetic, but Bianca was one hell of a good sister.
She’d dropped everything for me. I’d never in my life forget that.
That sort of deep shit didn’t just go away.
Hayden sat down and Mom settled on her other side. Bianca started rambling about a concert she was going to go to next weekend, and I sort of tuned her out. I loved her, but man, that girl could talk, and the coffee that Mom had so graciously put in front of me hadn’t come close to working yet.
“Bri?” Bianca said my name as if she’d said it once or twice already. Whoops. I was lost in my feels again. It seemed to happen a lot lately.
“Yeah?” I raised my eyebrows and focused on my sister. “Sorry, what did you say?”
“I asked you if the owner of the bar gave a statement to the police?” She took a bite and watched me as if she was concerned for my sanity.
Maybe she had reason to be, hell. Most days I did feel like I was losing it, anyway.
But then my mind caught up to what she’d asked, and I woke up fast. I shot daggers at my sister, any lingering appreciation for her moving to Bluewater with us flying out the window.
I hadn’t told Hayden why we were staying with my parents.
She was six years old. These kinds of things weren’t supposed to touch my sweet girl.
Besides, she’s already been through too much.
I cut my gaze at my daughter and Bianca’s eyes went wide.
“I’m sorry,” she mouthed.
But the damage was done. “What’s going on?” Hayden asked. She cocked her sassy, too-smart little head at me and fixed me with a glare.
Damn, my child was smart. “Nothing, baby. Nothing for you to worry about.”
She narrowed her little eyes. “Mom, what is it?”
“Nothing, just got into a little drama out with Kaylee the other night. It’s settled now.” I waved my fork at her. “Get back to eating.”
Everyone stared at their plates like they held the secret of life. Hayden looked at her grandparents, then her Aunt Bianca, then back at me. “Mom, is Dad back?”
My heart broke into a million pieces. My first instinct was to lie and keep her totally innocent, but being lied to never felt good, no matter the age.
“Yes, sweetie. He stopped by and talked to me as I left my girls’ night.
But there’s nothing to worry about because he won’t be back in our lives.
” I tried to sound as if I wasn’t worried in the least. I was terrified, but I’d do anything in my power to keep it from reaching Hayden.
Hayden studied me for a moment before she nodded and went back to her breakfast.
“I’m going to get some fresh air,” I announced a few minutes later. “Bianca? Join me?”
My sister paled and swallowed her bite. “Sure, yeah.”
She followed me out onto the back porch. I smiled at Hayden, who was still looking askance at me. That child! Too smart.
“Loose lips sink ships,” I hissed at my little sister as soon as I closed the door.
“I’m sorry.” She moaned and yanked me into a hug. “I wasn’t thinking.”
I relaxed and let her hug make me feel better. When I pulled back, she smiled in her cocky way. “I am very interested in that bartender. He’s freaking hot.”
I would’ve been blind not to have noticed that. “It doesn’t matter how hot or not hot Jace is.”
“Oh, so he has a name.” She nodded coolly. “I see.”
“Of course he has a name.” I tried not to smile at her teasing. “But he helped me out and I appreciate it. And that’s it. He gave a statement to the police and Damon is being handled for violating the restraining order. I just hope he listens and leaves me the hell alone.”
“I hate that he found us,” she whispered.
I wanted to give up and cry. “I know. My first instinct is to run again, but I can’t do that to you guys or Hayden. I’d pay a lot of money to find out how he found us, though.”
She hugged me again. “We’re family. We stick together no matter what. If you need to move again then we’ll move again.”
They’d all uprooted themselves and followed me to Bluewater as soon as the divorce was final. Making them move again wasn’t an option. “I’ve got to find a way to get through to him,” I said, “before it’s too late.”