Chapter 35 #2
He’s quiet for an extended moment before releasing a drawn-out breath. “Ariana, look at me,” he says, and like an idiot I do it on command. The corner of his mouth is ticked up, fighting a smile, but I fail to see what he could possibly be smiling about. “I don’t like coffee.”
I rear back, thrown by his comment and how it relates to all of this. “What? But you have coffee all the time.”
This time when I look at him, his smile is in full bloom.
“You heard me. I don’t like coffee. What I do like is coming into this coffee shop every day and pestering the beautiful owner until she graces me with her attention.
” He caresses my cheek, tracing his way across my jaw before sliding down my neck.
“So I order one of her delicious chocolate croissants, and whatever the special is because I don’t give a fuck what I’m drinking.
I’ll drink whatever she makes me. I might’ve been in denial for longer than I care to admit, but believe me when I tell you this has been a long time coming.
Why do you think I stopped coming in? Why I disappeared? ”
I shake my head because I don’t know. He’s never told me. Never explained himself.
“Because,” he continues, “I was starting to like you. More than I had any right to. That night on the patio at the Jackalope, I almost kissed you. I think you’d had too much to drink to realize it, which makes me glad it didn’t happen, but yeah, I was developing feelings, so I did what any poorly-adjusted commitment-phobic asshole does, and I removed myself from the situation.
I went ghost, thinking if I stayed away from you long enough those feelings would go away. ”
I’m stunned. I’m at a loss for words.
“But guess what, doll? They didn’t go away. In fact, they’ve only gotten stronger.”
If this is all true that would mean Cole was interested in me when I was still dressing the way I used to. When I didn’t wear makeup and I was even more shy than I am now. He just liked me, exactly the way I’ve always been.
He saw me when I thought I was invisible.
The intrusive doubts that wouldn’t let up have quieted. And nothing has ever been more clear to me than it is right now.
I nod against him, almost imperceptibly, but the flare of his eyes tells me it didn’t go unnoticed.
“What do you want, Ariana? Do you want to give us a real shot? Because I’m all in.”
“Yes,” I say through a watery laugh. “I’m all in too. It’s been real for me for a while and I was so afraid you wouldn’t want me back.”
The tortured twist of his features transforms, giving way to unguarded elation. His lips collide with mine in a savoring kiss.
“Are you my girl, baby?”
Five words and I’m done for, melting into him like milk chocolate under a flame.
“I’m yours,” I assure him. My hands drape over the back of his neck, tugging him down even more. I can’t get close enough to him. If it were possible I’d burrow between his ribs.
Cole breaks our embrace, his scorching gaze searching me. “And you’re not still interested in that poetry fucker?”
God, he’s so shamelessly possessive. “No.” I snicker. “I’m not still interested in Wes.”
His roaming hands find their way under the hem of my dress, skimming up my thighs. “Pretty sure his name is Les.”
“Nope.” I giggle.
“That’s weird,” his tongue licks between my lips, mouth hovering over mine, “because he’s definitely less than me.”
I’d roll my eyes if he wasn’t drifting down my neck, scattering nips across the delicate skin.
My head falls back, giving him more room, a moan slipping free. “You’re going to be a handful, aren’t you?”
“Why don’t you grab it and find out for yourself.”
He’s joking. He thinks I’ll swat him away with a blush and giggle. But I don’t. Instead, I palm his bulging length over his slacks, rubbing his growing erection.
I’m learning to be more brazen, more forward with what I want. And right now, I want all of him. I’m ready. I’m so, so ready.
“Hey.” He captures my chin. “I’m definitely not complaining about your hand on my dick, but there’s no pressure to do anything you’re not ready for. Just because we’re actually together now doesn’t mean I suddenly expect sex. This is still at your pace, okay?”
The tight feeling in my chest is either adoration or something I’m not quite ready to label with that heavy four-letter word.
I was so convinced Cole wasn’t the guy for me, I nearly missed him—nearly missed out on this amazing man.
It’s his endless patience, his care every step of the way, that makes me trust him more than I’ve ever trusted anyone.
My body is ready. I’m ready. I just hope he’s ready too.
“Cole.” I drag my fingertips down the hard planes of his chest and abs, settling them above the button of his pants. “I want you. I’m ready.”
He latches his hand around my wrist, his thumb rubbing small circles over my pulse point. For such an innocent touch, I feel it deep at the center of the ache building between my thighs.
“Are you sure? Because I did not come into this date with that in mind. We can—”
I cut him off, pressing my mouth to his. My tongue pokes out through my lips, coaxing his apart, teasing until he finally lets me in.
He kisses me back, taking control of it, and a thrilling surge flows through my body. It’s finally going to happen.
His hands slide under my ass, fingers splaying beneath my thighs, and lifting me off the counter. I wind my legs around him and let him carry me away.
He kicks the bedroom door open loud enough I think I hear the snap of wood but I’m way too preoccupied to care.
Rather than toss me onto the bed like I was expecting, he sits at the edge, keeping me straddled over his lap. Drawing his lips from mine, he smooths his hand over my hair, staring into my eyes.
“Just like everything else we’ve done, say the word and I’ll stop. You never have to do anything you don’t want to.”
“I know,” I tell him, breathless. I’m nervous and excited and a little scared too. I know it’s not technically my first time, but it feels like it is.
My head starts to spin with panic, worrying if it’ll hurt, if I’ll be bad at it, if I’ll do something embarrassing, and worst of all the worry it’ll be like my first time all over again.
But I remind myself that Cole would never do that to me. He’s a good man, better than he realizes.
We keep kissing as Cole guides my hips to grind over his hardened cock. Fully clothed, our bodies move together. His palm runs up my inner thigh, his fingers toying with my lace panties.
He releases a ragged groan and it vibrates between us. “You’re already so wet.”
Using two of his fingers, he rubs them over my clit and smears my arousal between my pussy lips. His circular strokes are neither fast nor slow, caught somewhere on the cusp of feeling good but not good enough to come.
I try to roll my hips faster but he won’t let me set the pace.
He chuckles against me. “I’m going to take care of you, don’t worry. You’re coming at least twice before you get my cock.”
Easing back, my eyes widen. “Twice?!”
He lifts his brows, making him look simultaneously smug and sexy.
“Fuck, yeah, twice. And then a few more times after that.” His lips graze my ear, his hot breath feathering against my skin before the faint drag of stubble sparks a slow, molten warmth deep in my belly.
His hands grab hold of my dress. “Let’s take this off.
I need to see you. Need those perfect tits in my mouth. ”
It’s a slip dress and easily glides off, leaving me in nothing but my bra and underwear.
I’ve accepted my body the way it is, but accepting it and feeling secure in it are two very different things. The thought of being intimate with someone used to scare me because of how vulnerable it is—letting someone see you completely, every flaw, every insecurity laid bare.
For so long, I felt like the “chubby twin,” the less desirable one between us. Words that haunted me. Words that cut even deeper because they came from someone I thought I could trust with a part of myself I’d never given to anyone before.
But Cole has never made me feel anything less than beautiful. The heat in his eyes when they travel over my body can’t be faked. This man truly wants me—soft belly, wide hips, thick thighs. He wants all of me.
With his gaze laser-focused on my chest, he yanks down the cups of my bra, causing my breasts to spill out.
“Fuck, baby. I need them.” Dipping his head, he takes one into his mouth, his tongue swirling around my areola before sucking my nipple between his teeth.
When he’s satisfied with the way it peaks, he moves to the other, lapping at it, teasing me.
Reaching behind me, he unhooks my bra, tossing it to the floor to join my dress, and then his hands are on me—palming, kneading, gripping, his thumbs flicking and pinching the hardened buds.
He looks at them like he’s never seen breasts before, pushing them together, testing their weight in his hands.
“One day I’m going to put my cock between these and fuck them until they’re covered in cum.
Would you like that? Want me to paint your tits and make a mess all over you? ”
“Yes,” I moan. Because I do. I want every dirty, filthy thing he wants to do to me.
I get to work on the buttons of his shirt, since he’s unfairly still fully clothed, and strip him out of it. My mouth starts to water at the sight of his bare chest, all those rippling muscles under olive skin. He really is so bafflingly hot. So devastatingly handsome I can’t believe he’s mine.
I meet his gaze after an appreciative perusal of his body, finding a cocky smirk stretched across his face. “I have an idea if you’re up for it.”
“Yes,” I agree before I even know what it is.
He laughs, leaning back on his hands, palms pressed into the bed, his eyes blazing as they rake over me. “I want you to sit on my face and ride that wet little pussy over me until I’m drowning.”