Chapter 42
Katie
“That’s the spot.”
I was walking across the pavement towards the swanky night market when I heard Rhett’s voice. It was like his mouth was still just by my ear, his arms around me, not me standing on the footpath. I glanced around me, sure someone else could hear the filthy words in my head, but all I saw were pretty people streaming towards the gates. My hands smoothed down my dress and then I started forward again.
“He’s hitting you right where you need it.” My cheeks flushed bright red. I kept my eyes on the ground, trying to focus on the pretty shoes I’d put on, not this memory. “But he’s not giving you enough.” Bloody hell, that was the killer. It was like Rhett saw deep inside me and discovered my inner size queen. That stretch… “Give her another finger.”
“Another?”
I stopped still, my hands shaking, my legs still feeling all wobbly. Part of me was still there, riding the high of three orgasms, or was it four? Right as I was congratulating myself, a couple shot me a dark look, because I’d obviously stopped dead in front of them. They walked around me and towards the entrance, reminding me I needed to do the same. I saw Mandie in the distance, giving Gwen a hug, obviously having just arrived, and made a beeline for them.
Only to see the sight of Bronson pelting up the hall and under Garrett’s bed replay in my head. Some irrational part of me felt like his pain was the price I had to pay for all that pleasure. It was easier to feel guilty, to feel mad at Rhys and his thoughtlessness, than to just sit with what happened. With no input from them, new people had moved in next door and brought an aggressive dog.
And I’d had my first threesome.
I fought back a smirk as my sister looked up and caught sight of me. She smiled at first, then her eyes narrowed, and I caught the moment when she sucked in a breath. As soon as I got within reach, I slapped a hand over her mouth, much to the shock of people standing around us, waiting to get into the market.
“Don’t you dare say a word.”
I’m not sure when our relationship got so co-dependent that she could tell when I got laid, but the look in Mandie’s eyes made clear she knew. Her muffled sounds, her frantic attempt to claw my hand away was then replaced by the unmistakably disgusting feel of her licking my hand.
“Ew! Why the hell would you do that?” I asked, rubbing my palm on my dress.
“Not sure why you’re getting all squicky.” Her hands went to her hips. “Hopefully this is not the first time you’ve been licked today.”
That had Gwen and Natasha turning my way, a curious gleam in their eyes, along with some of the other people milling around, waiting to be admitted.
“Can you—?” I started to say.
“Was it the murse or the firefighter?” Mandie’s grin grew wider. “Or the murse and the firefighter.”
“Shut, and I say this with all love?—”
“Next.”
A beautiful woman toting a clipboard looked the lot of us over with a jaundiced eye. It landed on me and stayed there as she frowned slightly.
“Mandie Miller,” my sister said, handing over her invitation. The girls did the same and the woman gave them a cursory look before handing them back.
“And you?”
Her perfectly plucked eyebrow rose slowly as she looked me up and down.
I’d put on a nice dress and makeup, but it looked like it wasn’t enough. The woman’s face hardened, as if preparing herself for an onslaught of bullshit from me.
“This is my sister,” Mandie explained.
“I don’t have a sister on the list.” The woman didn’t even consult the clipboard. “You’ll need?—”
“No, but I’m down for a plus one.” My sister spent a lot of her time being a goofy idiot, but when it came to door bitches, no one was going to intimidate her. “You can check the list.”
No please or can you, the door bitch seemed to sense she’d met her equal and then looked down the list again before placing a tick beside Mandie’s name.
“So you do. Enjoy the launch.”
“Ooh, this looks pretty,” Gwen said, staring at all the fairy lights that had been strung up across the market grounds.
“So who was it?” Mandie was not to be deterred. “Was it one, two…?” She stared into my eyes, but spoke over me when I tried to answer. “Three? Was it three?”
“I need to move out of the apartment,” I said, stroking my forehead. “We need our own space.”
“So you can have orgies in your own home, I get it.” Mandie shrugged. “So?—”
“I’m going to get a boba tea,” Gwen said, not paying attention to any of this. “Tash?”
“Grab me a mango tea.” Natasha handed over some cash. “I think I’m gonna need to arbitrate here.”
“Garrett and I went to puppy yoga,” I told Mandie. “It was so cute. Some of them tried to pull his compression tights off and I saw… not-so-little Garrett. We did some downward dog and then went back to his place for some more practice. Rhett was there and?—”
“He’s the firefighter?” Mandie asked. I nodded, watching her grin fade. “The one that was supposed to take you to yoga?”
“Um, yeah.” I shook my head. “He got sent home to rest after fighting fires all night, and I guess we woke him up.” I couldn’t stop the grin from spreading across my face. “Didn’t seem too stressed about it, though. Quite the opposite.” It felt like I was fighting to keep the memories of what happened today back and right now I gave in to it. My cheeks had to be burning bright red as I stared at the ground and saw them, not the crushed grass. “So yeah, I was with the firefighter, Rhett, and the m… Garrett. It was amazing, and all four of us are going out for dinner tomorrow night. Five, if you include the dog.”
So why wasn’t my sister happy for me?
“Oh.”
Watching Mandie blink, then try to smile and fail dispelled the warm fuzzies almost immediately. Natasha was looking anywhere but at us. The second hand embarrassment was like a knife stabbing into my heart.
“Oh?” I stepped forward. “Oh? Weren’t you the one that was telling me to go out there and try new things? I did.” My smile threatened to return. “A few, actually.”
“Right, but doesn’t it bother you?”
The careful way Mandie spoke had my spine stiffening. It felt like people were doing that my entire life, talking to me as if they had to get the sock puppets out to explain stuff like I was five.
“Having multiple orgasms with two hot guys is supposed to bother me?” I turned to Natasha, hoping a third, neutral party would intervene, but she just watched this all unfold, palpably uncomfortable.
“Having guys space on you when they plan a date.”
Mandie said that real quietly, but it felt like a punch to the gut nonetheless.
“He didn’t space.” Why the hell was my voice rising? “Rhett was?—”
“At home, sleeping, when he was supposed to take you out.” My sister shook her head. “Look, none of this matters if you don’t get serious about them. Are you getting serious?”
“I…”
Any answer I might have died in my throat.
“I guess you can make a decision after dinner tomorrow night.” Her smile seemed brittle somehow. “I mean, if they all turn up when they say they do…”
Unlike Dave.
The guys were so damn different to my ex, I hadn’t made the connection, but Mandie had. Somehow in her mind, they’d shifted from being hot rebound dudes to what…?
Potential partners, and that meant they were being judged by a whole new standard.
“Tash, back me up here,” Mandie said.
“Natasha,” she corrected, “and I think I should keep out of this part.”
“C’mon, you’re the only person I know who understands how polyam relationships work. It’s not that different to straight guy/girl ones, right? Flaking on plans, that’s a red flag in that community as well?”
“Communication.” I wasn’t sure if Natasha was on my side or Mandie’s, or her own, but she stared into my eyes. “That’s the most important thing. Being clear in your own head about what you want and then communicating that to your partners. Everything else.” She shrugged. “That’s for you to negotiate and not anyone outside the relationship.”
A meaningful look was shot Mandie’s way, forcing my sister to step off her high horse for a moment, and that was when Gwen returned with the boba.
“These are amazing!” She handed each one of us a plastic cup and a thick straw. “You’re gonna love it. The lady running the stall, she wants to shoot some content…”
I watched the three of them cluster together, not really hearing what they were saying. I couldn’t, not when I was still processing what had been said. Communication… I looked down at my phone and saw a bunch of messages had popped up from Rhys.
Found a cool pub in the hills we can go to. You’re allowed to have dogs in the beer garden, so find something pretty to wear, we’re taking you out. Seconds later, another message had been sent. Not something too pretty. I don’t want to be fighting guys for looking sideways at you on our first real date. I mean, I can and will. The timestamp showed that another couple of minutes went by before the next message was sent. Garrett told me to say that you should wear whatever the hell you want and we will love it. So, you gonna come out with us, Katie, and let us show you how good we can be together?
My lips twitched without meaning to and I’m sure I looked like a loon, smiling at my phone like that, but right now I didn’t care. I typed out the only answer I could.
Love to.
“Look.” Mandie appeared by my shoulder. “I’m sorry. Tash made clear I was overstepping.”
I looked past her to where her friend was standing, watching the two of us. She shot me a small smile.
“She did, did she?” I focussed back on my sister. “You won’t listen to me, but you’ll listen to her.”
“The point is, I’m listening,” she said. “Do you like these guys? Do you want something serious with them? Because if you do, I have ideas.”
I shook my head. She’d dimmed the light that glowed inside me momentarily, but I could almost hear Rhys’ excitement in his texts and somehow that got me through this.
“You do, do you? Why am I not surprised?”
“Dress shopping,” Mandie said, like that was the answer to well, everything. “You, me, Tash–”
“Natasha wants to come dress shopping with us?”
“She’s a freaking guru at dressing different sized bodies.” Her hand scratched the back of her neck. “A lot better than I can.” I crossed my arms, mentally replaying some of the times we’d fought pitched battles in dress stores. She grabbed my shoulders. “I want you to go on a proper date, where the guys don’t cancel on you. I want them to open your door for you and treat you right and most of all, I want you to feel beautiful doing it.”
Everything Dave hadn’t done, that was what she was saying, and perhaps that’s why I nodded in agreement.
“Alright,” I said, “let’s do this.”