Chapter 20
twenty
Kaiden
It was inconceivable, but the proof was right in front of me. Her embarrassment and uncertainty were so strong I could taste it. Still blushing red with the lingering arousal she couldn’t shake despite the abrupt turn in the conversation, Eryn stared wide-eyed at the wall just past my head.
Avoiding eye contact. Bingo.
I wasn’t such a pussy that I couldn’t admit how much our last encounter had hurt me.
Every time I touched her, it meant something.
She could deny it all she wanted; I knew the truth.
It still sucked, though, to hear her declare otherwise, which made me a little pissy the last few days.
Did that mean I’d let this opportunity pass me by? No fucking way.
“I asked you a question.” I dropped my tone, tapping into that growl I knew she loved to hear.
Right on cue, she shivered and stopped hiding.
It was all there on display, her nerves, and her desire.
Her rosy blush spread down her neck to the tops of her breasts peeking over the rim of her top.
Those little shorts had to go, but I took one more moment to admire how long they made her legs look.
I’d sworn to not touch her again unless she admitted that this wasn’t all one-sided, but one more taste couldn’t hurt.
“How have you never touched yourself?” I asked, genuinely curious.
She wasn’t a virgin. I could tell that much, but wasn’t self-discovery several steps before sex?
She shook her head like that would get the words to break free. “T-there’s never been a time to try. I’ve always lived or slept right next to someone.”
That was a plausible enough reason, but she didn’t go searching for that alone time?
Wasn’t curious? I didn’t buy it. It was more likely that the few times she might have tried, it had done nothing for her.
Too little experience and not enough incentive to keep going.
It was hard to imagine a grown woman not knowing her own body. Time to fix that.
“Do you know how?” I pressed, and her eyes narrowed.
“I’m not stupid,” she snapped. “I feel around with my fingers.”
I held back a groan at the image she painted and forced myself to stay in the chair. My dick throbbed already. He was definitely paying attention.
“That’s right,” I nodded. “Light pressure, hard, whatever you like. In circles, rubbing, even a light pinch will work.” Her breath caught as I described all the ways my own fingers were familiar with her.
I could practically feel her drenching my hand.
“I wonder how many of your fingers it would take. If you curl them back, there’s a spot I know from experience you find particularly sensitive. ”
Her chest rose and fell rapidly as her breathing increased. She stared at me, shocked at my words, but not enough to take them and give it a try.
She shyly glanced down, the bed sheets twisting in her little fists. “Never mind.”
That wouldn’t do. My girl was missing out on the joys of her own body, and I couldn’t stand it.
“No, no, princess. We’re going to solve this problem right here, right now.”
Her head snapped up as I stood and walked over to the end of the bed.
“We?” She swallowed. Her legs lightly trembled at the idea, and I smiled. Perfect.
“I’m going to teach you,” I swore, and took a little edge off by feeling on her soft thighs as I pulled at her denim shorts.
The way we were both wound up, this wouldn’t take long, but I had to stay in control enough to do as I promised.
She didn’t resist me as I pushed her back and took her panties off too, flinging them somewhere off to the side.
Looking at her spread before me like a buffet begging to be devoured, I put a mental chokehold on my dick and told it to behave.
It pushed against my jeans in retaliation.
Fuck, that was uncomfortable.
“Slide your hand down your stomach,” I directed her. After a moment’s hesitation, she did as I asked. “Slower. Feel how soft you are.”
Below her belly button she slowed, her fingers gently reaching. They knew where to go, she only had to trust them. The pad of her middle finger danced lower but faltered just above her pussy. It was pink and swollen, already dripping and ready for us.
That claiming voice in my head demanded I brush her hand aside and show her how it was done, but I silenced it.
“How do you like it?”
She frowned. “I don’t know.”
I smirked. “When I touch you, how do you like it? Hard presses? Soft brushes? Tell me.”
A soft moan escaped, and her hips jerked. “All of it,” she panted. “I love everything you do to me.”
Fuck! My head dropped, and I clenched my jaw to keep from exploding at her innocent words. She was perfect. Once I scraped control back, I met her half-lidded stare with one of my own.
“Soft then,” I whispered. “Start soft.”
That middle finger was on the move again, more confident this time. It slipped through her slick lips with no resistance, and her mouth parted on a moan.
“Gentle,” I coached. “Rub the tip of your finger down one side of your clit, then back up the other.” She did, and her thigh tightened under my palm.
I squeezed it in response. “Again.” When she couldn't stop her hips from twitching with each downward stroke, I allowed her to progress.
“Circles now.” Her hand got to work. “Harder. I want to hear how wet you are.”
We both lost our breath with her next motions.
“Kaiden,” she moaned. “It’s not enough.”
My dark chuckle made her frown, but she didn’t stop. I knew it wasn’t enough, but she needed to build the tension before she could shatter it.
“Then slip that finger inside,” I dared her. “Feel how tight you are, and follow the pleasure to whatever feels good.”
I studied her face, not trusting myself enough to watch what she flaunted right within my reach. I heard her add one finger and then another. Her eyes closed under creased brows, and she bit her lip hard enough I thought it would bleed.
“Curl them,” I urged her. “Reach for it.”
She thrashed her head. Defeat strangled the bond as she told me without words that it wasn’t working. She was so close. Fuck, so was I just from watching her. My own fingers brushed hers as I slid a digit in with her two. Her eyes flew open as a guttural moan fought its way free.
“Put those fingers to work on your clit, princess. I’ve got you here.”
It didn’t take long after that. Two circles and a curl of my finger had her shattering into a million pieces. My smug pride didn’t last long. I pushed away from her with some mumbled excuse and ran to the shower to finish myself off.
I didn’t give her a chance to cheapen what we had done with her denials. The shower stall and steam surrounded me before I even knew that my dick and I were right on the edge.
Eryn
“There. Now you know.”
Those were Kaiden’s last words, spit almost harshly as he left me and disappeared into the ensuite. Seconds later, I heard the shower running. I wasn’t completely naive; I knew what he was doing in there. His arousal saturated our bond, reigniting mine even after what he wrung from my body.
How would he react if I offered to help? He’d never expected anything from me before, but would he if I instigated it? For once, his lack of demands made me want to act. I stripped off the rest of my clothes, double-checking that my bandage was sealed, and crept into the bathroom.
The small space was too foggy to see much besides the marble counters, but I followed the sound of running water until my palms landed on the glass shower. I opened the door and steam rolled out, clearing enough for me to catch my first real look at Kaiden’s cock. Gods above, he was huge.
And thick.
His fist pumped the shaft all the way to the swollen, ruby tip. A small bead of cum called to me where it was smeared just beneath his navel, and a light trail of hair led me right back down. I swallowed. He was close if the sounds of near pain were any indication.
“Feeling brave?” he growled. “Or just here to watch?”
His eyes flared when my tongue darted out to wet my lips. The tip of him was leaking, and I wanted a taste. I reached out, not in control of my own movements, and he groaned again, snapping me out of it. I didn’t know what I was doing.
By his less-than-smooth motions, he didn’t have much control left, and I wanted to be the one to get him there like he’d done for me.
But what if he didn’t like it? Kaiden caught my wrist as I pulled away.
He tugged me forward. Together, he wrapped our hands around his cock, then guided us up and down, using more pressure than I expected.
I gave a tentative but stronger squeeze, and his knees buckled. For something so smooth and silken to the touch, his cock could take more pressure than I thought possible. At least I didn’t have to worry about breaking it.
“Brush your thumb over the head,” he whispered harshly, his voice pitched an octave so low that I had to make sure it was really him I held in my hand.
The pad of my thumb traced the slit at the tip of his cock, gathering the thick fluid my grip milked. I brought my hand to my mouth and groaned at the taste. A little salty, but not as bad as I’d heard multiple girls complain about. Before I could second-guess myself, I dropped to my knees.
Down here, the spray of the shower soaked my entire side in seconds, but I didn’t care. I reached for him once more, only for him to stop me.
“We probably shouldn’t do this.” It looked like it pained him to say it. Was he worried he pressured me into it? He didn’t.
“I want to make you feel good,” I said, gripping him once more. His hips jerked as I slid a hand up his length.
“Fuck,” he moaned, his hand stopping me again. “What I mean is, we can’t keep doing this if you’re going to continue to lie about it meaning something.” His entire body shook from holding back, but he didn’t release my hand. “Because it fucking does. It means something to me.”
That’s what had him so on edge this week? I only meant we couldn’t complete the bond. It was a defense mechanism and more for myself—to keep my senses when he tried his best to obliterate them. Gods, I hadn’t meant to hurt him. But I had.
I felt it now, like a tear in the bond. It throbbed in a similar way to a wound.
I wasn’t ready to sign my life away or to tie myself to him forever, but everything we’d done, including this right here, wasn’t an empty action.
I was scared to look too closely at what exactly it meant, but it wasn’t nothing.
I hated that I ever uttered those words out loud.
“Can you admit it?” He asked after what I was sure was a close monitor of my emotions. I nodded. “I need the words, Eryn.”
“It means something,” I admitted.
He grabbed my hair and wrapped it around his fist. The grip was tight enough to sting as my curls were pulled at the roots, and I cried out as he tipped my head back. His cock sat right in front of me, the tip rubbing around my lips.
“Then open up, princess. Show me what you can do.”
With only the head in my mouth, I knew it would be an effort to take him all the way down, but dammit, I was determined to try. He was thick on my tongue, and I lapped at him like he was my favorite candy before sucking hard, hollowing my cheeks.
A snarl left his throat, and I knew I’d done something right. It was instinct I followed as I licked and nibbled my way to the base. Both my hands wrapped around him next as I took him as deep as I could, swallowing when he hit too far back so I wouldn’t gag.
“Princess, you have to stop,” he begged and tried to pull me off. I clutched his ass and held on, swallowing again.
My eyes watered, and my jaw ached, but I wasn’t letting go until he finished.
“I’m gonna come,” he warned.
I brought a hand back to him and squeezed around the base while my tongue lapped at that ridge just under the head.
I looked up. His eyes went dark as he came, and the back of my throat was coated with jet after jet as he roared his release.
I tried to remember to breathe through my nose, but it was still too much.
Coughing, I pulled off and prayed I hadn’t ruined everything by quitting right at the very end.
Kaiden sank to his knees in front of me, still trying to catch his breath.
Grabbing my head in both hands, he slammed our lips together, forcing my mouth open until our tongues tangled.
He didn’t seem to mind the taste of himself as he owned me with only a kiss.
“Thank you,” he said against my mouth, before resting his forehead against mine.
I felt him smile down the bond and tentatively opened my side enough to allow the barest of touches. I didn’t know what bullshit I tried to convince myself of before. This definitely meant something. It meant everything.