Chapter 40 Brad
Brad
The moment I hear one knock against the door, I’m flying across the room.
I swing the door open so hard it slams against the wall—and then I’m all over him, arms locking around him before I can even breathe.
“Jesus, Noah.” I bury my face in his neck. “I was so scared I lost you again,” I say breathlessly as I kiss the side of his face. My lips have a mind of their own as I cover him in soft pecks, all the way to his mouth.
Relief hits me the moment I can feel him melt into me. Drinking in his soft moans against my lips, I close the door behind him.
“Brad,” he softly murmurs. “We need to talk.” He gently lays a hand on my chest, pushing us apart.
“Yeah, we’re doing that.” I smile, biting at his neck. I grab ahold of his hand and turn towards the staircase. “Come on, let me show you upstairs.”
But, Noah doesn’t move. His feet stick to the ground, urging me to stop.
My heart drops to my stomach once I turn back and see his face.
Something’s tormenting him. He’s upset.
I rush in, taking his face in my hands. “What’s wrong? Talk to me.” I brush his hair out of his eyes so I can really see him.
“I need to tell you something that’s really going to suck.” Noah licks his lips. That’s when I really focus.
I pinch his chin, taking in the faint bruising along his jawline. I can see now that his bottom lip is puffy and red.
“Did I do that to you the other night? Was I being too rough?”
Noah sighs deeply, catching my hand in his. “No, Brad. Please, just listen to me.”
Our gaze lingers for a beat as I judge the sincerity of his voice. I slowly nod my head, and walk us to the kitchen.
The guys have all finished up for the day so there’s no watchful eyes on us. We’ve got total privacy here—which is good, because whatever Noah’s about to say looks serious.
We head to the kitchen and both take a seat on the island bar stools.
“You know you can tell me anything.” I remind him.
“Yeah, I know.” He nods. Noah takes in a deep breath, positioning his elbows on the counter top and clasping his hands. His knee bounces quickly, and I rest my hand on his thigh to steady him. I’ve seriously never seen him this nervous before. It’s off-putting.
“I was on my way out of town to go camping with Dakota and her friends for the weekend. To uh…get away.” Noah begins.
I bite my tongue even though I hate that he was doing that. He was planning on leaving me again. Fantastic.
“And,” he continues. “ On my way there…” He takes a deep breath in, focusing on his fingers tangling with mine. “I spotted my mom's car in the Stone & Creek parking lot.”
My brows pinch. Why would she be there?
Noah’s fingers tighten in mine. His eyes are pleading, and I already know—whatever he’s about to say will change everything.
“She’s sleeping with Kevin.”
I blink.
“I saw it. Walked into his office, and he was between her legs like it wasn’t the first time.” He looks down. “I told him I was going to tell you. Punches were thrown and he threatened me. Said if I told you…he’d tell my mom everything. About us.”
I swear I can feel all the blood drain from my face.
Without thinking, I stand up from my stool. “I’m going to kill him.”
Noah quickly grabs my hand, pulling me back. “No. Brad, you won’t be killing anybody.”
“He hurt you. He touched you. I can’t—” I shake my head feeling my blood boil under my skin.
A smile flickers on Noah's lips as he cups his hand around the back of my neck, pulling me back into the present moment.
“He did hit me but I hit him first.” Noah winks, instantly taking some of the edge off. Of course he threw the first punch.
Still, I reach up and cup his cheek, my thumb brushing gently over his lip. My chest aches at the thought of him hurting. I can’t stand it.
“Are you okay?” My voice wavers.
Noah smiles faintly, closing his hand around my wrist. “I’m fine. I should be asking you that.”
Oh…right.
I take a deep breath and stare down at the ground as I go through the facts in my head.
Veronica’s cheating on me.
With my best friend.
I don’t know whether to laugh or to cry. I mean…can I even be upset? I cheated too. I’ve been lying and keeping secrets for over a year. But still, this feels shitty.
Kevin knew about Noah and I. He knew, and still slept with her. Was it personal? Did they want to hurt me?
“Are you okay?” Noah asks, squeezing my arm.
I connect my eyes back to his, in an attempt to calm myself down.
“It’s just a lot,” I admit.
He huffs out a slight laugh. “Yeah, it really is.”
I look down at my other hand still locked in his. “Kevin knows.”
Noah nods his head. “Yeah, Kevin knows.”
“But Veronica doesn’t know yet?” I ask.
Noah shakes his head. “Unless you confront him, I can’t see why he’d tell my mom. They can keep living in their blissful affair, for all he cares.”
I nod my head, letting the information filter through. This is really happening. The truth is slipping between the cracks and soon, it’ll all rush out like a flooded dam.
There’s no stopping this. Veronica is going to learn about Noah and I, whether it’s on my terms or not.
But, right now, the only thing that scares me more is losing Noah and right now, I’m not sure where we stand.
What is there to confess if there’s nothing left?
“Noah,” I open my mouth.
“Brad,” He grabs my hand, and pulls it close to his chest. “Outing someone is incredibly dangerous, and the fact that he’s not only willing to sleep with your fiancé, but out you in the process, is heinous.
You should be the only one who gets to decide when you come out.
You get to decide when the time is right…
for you.” Noah, squeezes my hand firmly.
I close my eyes, really taking in his words. He’s not just talking about Kevin.
“I’m sorry for pressuring you.” Noah shakes his head. “If you aren’t ready, then that’s your business. I know this hasn't been easy for you either.”
I nod my head simply. But inside, I know enough is enough. I know where my feelings lie and I know they’re never going to change.
“No,” I take in a big breath. “Noah, I’m done. Done pretending there’s any other endgame for me. You’re all I want. You’re all I’ll ever want.” I lift his chin so he looks me right in the eyes as I say it. “I knew it the day I met you.”
Noah sucks in a breath, standing up from his seat. “You need to think about this? We can take some time.”
I shake my head. “No. No more thinking. Not when I already know.”
I see a sparkle in his eyes as he studies my face. He’s scared I’ll change my mind. Maybe that’s why he’s been running so much.
Noah slips off the seat and instinctively, I grab onto his arm. The fear of not seeing him again courses through my body. No, I can’t stand it. I need him close.
As though he can hear my thoughts, he immediately soothes my inner demons.
“Don’t worry. I’m standing up because I’m coming to join you.” He smiles softly, rubbing my hand. “I won’t run away from you, Brad. I’m so sorry that I did before. I’ll work on that.”
My shoulders relax. I didn’t realize how much I needed to hear him say that. I loosen my grip on his arm and spread my legs so he can step between them. Grabbing my face in his hands, he places a tender kiss on my lips.
“I love you,” he mutters softly.
“I love you.” I pull him in for another kiss.
I love him even though I’m not ‘supposed to’. Even with secrets waiting to blow us wide open.