4. Chapter 4
Chapter 4
L eaving the coffee shop, careful not to spill her drink on her Professional Daydreamer T-shirt, Sophie navigated the hallway leading to the conference room at Naked Runway , barely thinking about Stone Cold and his vibes of anti-book boyfriend material.
Each step took her by fabulously styled individuals wearing designs she couldn’t afford. As such, she’d decided it was the perfect day to debut her latest creation. A bright pink tee she’d embellished over the weekend with her career of choice all in celebration of her new gig. She’d decided to pair it with a black tulle skirt sporting a field of dancing wildflowers along its hem.
Over the past week, every time she reminded herself she’d landed the gig for a year-long column at Manhattan’s premier fashion magazine, giddiness had filled her with cheeky smiles and bubbly laughter. According to a follow-up gab session with Isabella, they’d had over one hundred applications.
Isabella had also informed Sophie that Frankie had insisted she needed a month-by-month breakdown of Sophie’s planned columns so she could properly plan the non-digital magazine’s layout, thus today’s gathering.
Arriving at the meeting room, Sophie discovered it empty. Had she gotten the dates mixed up? Or the time? Or had Ms. Birdie changed her mind and sent Sophie a pink slip?
Stop spiraling, Sophie.
The admonishing voice in her head was that of five-year-old Sophie’s therapist, a grandmotherly woman who’d worked with Sophie in the months after her parents had died in a boating accident. The three-word command triggered a memory-muscle response. Sophie closed her eyes, inhaled deeply, and exhaled slowly.
It wasn’t until she heard someone clearing their throat that Sophie realized she wasn’t alone. She opened her eyes.
“You okay?” Isabella asked, viewing her quizzically.
Sophie grinned. “I’m better than fine. I’m fabulous. Just grounding myself for today’s presentation.”
Isabella nodded and then tilted her head and eyed Sophie’s whimsical ensemble.
Taking care not to fidget, Sophie waited.
“I love your look. It’s fresh and enchanting and gives me an idea of how to brand you to our readers.”
“Thanks,” Sophie beamed, tucking her curls behind her ears. “I can’t wait to hear your plan.” She’d never considered the idea of Naked Runway branding her. Now that she was, she rather liked it. They’d branded the Prince of Manhattan as a rake. What would they come up with for her? Hopefully not as a flake.
The sound of voices prevented her from inquiring more.
Ms. Birdie, Frankie, and the man from the coffee shop walked into the conference room. Stone Cold. A man who had both intrigued and startled her earlier. His shaved head and broad shoulders were completely at odds with the suit he wore. One shouted menacing, the other important. Why was he—oh.
“Hello Stone,” Isabella said. “I’d like to introduce you to Sophie E. Clark.” She glanced at Sophie. “Sophie, meet Stone Blackthorn, your bodyguard.”
“He’s going to be my fake boyfriend.” Incredulity painted her words as she stared at his scowl.
“You’re my new client?” Stone asked.
“Is there a problem?” Frankie inquired. “We can call this whole thing off. It’s not too late.”
“Nonsense,” Ms. Birdie said. “No one is calling anything off. Sophie, dear, why do you look so concerned?”
Sophie waved open palms; fingers splayed. “Look at this guy. No one will agree to an interview with him in the picture, fake boyfriend or not. He’ll scare them off.”
Stone tugged at the collar of his suit jacket. “I suggest you—”
“Why don’t we all take a seat?” Isabella said. “Sophie, you can start your presentation. Perhaps that will help us all better understand your concern and give Stone a solid understanding of his upcoming mission. Stone, I was so sorry to hear about your accident but was very happy you could do this job. How is Ryder?”
Stone’s expression went carefully blank. “He’s doing fine.”
“Wonderful. He’s a great guy and deserves happiness.”
“Yes. He does.” Stone turned his attention to Sophie. “I’m ready when you are.”
Sophie wanted to ponder that weird exchange but now wasn’t the time. She had bigger problems to consider. The biggest was how her daydreams could survive in the shadow of Stone’s towering presence. His impenetrable gray storm aura would cast ugly thunder clouds over her sparkly, iridescent one.
She stepped to the front of the conference table where a computer was set up and slid her flash drive into the slot.
The ladies took a seat, and Stone leaned against the wall while Sophie pulled up her PowerPoint. The title page appeared. “Stone, my column will be titled: Find Your Book Boyfriend .”
She really liked the graphics for this screen. It had vectors of men, holding the book in which they were the hero. Or at least they were her vision of what each of the heroes looked like from the descriptions given by the authors of their book stories.
“Each month, one of these images will be featured in my column and next to them will be the real-life single man who matches them.”
Stone snorted.
“I missed that, Stone,” Sophie said sweetly. “Did you have a comment?”
“Other than the whole thing sounds ridiculous,” he responded, “I don’t.”
“I’m certain it does sound rather odd to a man like you. My column is geared toward those with the heart of a romantic. The keywords are heart and romantic . On the surface, you appear to neither have a heart nor know the first thing about romancing a woman.” Under normal circumstances, Sophie would never be so rude, but if he was on the fence about accepting the position as her bodyguard, her mission was to dissuade him.
He raised a brow. “You’re very astute.”
Sophie took a deep breath, focusing on the screen. This was her moment, her dream. She couldn’t allow Stone’s intimidating appearance to distract her. With a determined click of the remote, Sophie dove into her proposal, hoping her passion would be enough to eclipse any doubts from the women in the room—and maybe, just maybe, soften the foreboding edge that Stone brought into the mix.
“Book Boyfriend Connoisseurs conducted a survey of all its members to discover their top one hundred book boyfriends,” Sophie said. “The survey was broken down into categories. My column, for this year, will focus on the top twelve winners in the contemporary romantic comedy category.”
“Why romantic comedy?” Frankie asked.
“Because it will set the tone for the column,” Sophie replied. “One of happiness and ease.”
“I’m not totally sold on that, it’s a bit boring, but move along, time is wasting,” Frankie ordered.
“The top twelve books in the rom-com category were: one, Aggie the Horrible versus Max the Pompous Ass by—”
Stone grunted.
Sophie paused and glanced at him. “Comment?”
“Sorry. The title just surprised me.”
She gave him a benign smile and continued. “Two, Anyone But The Billionaire by Sara L. Hudson. Three, Funny Story by Emily Henry. Four, Falling for My Enemy by Claire Kingsley. Five, Things We Left Behind by Lucy Score. Six, The Magnolia Chronicles by Kate Canterbary. Seven, Love Hacked by Penny Reid. Eight, Made in Manhattan by Lauren Layne. Nine, The Bride’s Runaway Billionaire by Pippa Grant. Ten, Most Eligible Billionaire by Annika Martin. Eleven, Single Dad on Top by J. J. Knight. And twelve, Tangled by Emma Chase.” She showed each book cover as she read the name of the book and its author.
“I read half those books on vacation last summer,” Isabella said. “I can see why they were chosen.”
“Of course you’ve read them. It’s not like being the editor-in-chief of the digital side of things is too demanding. I, on the other hand, have no time to vacation, let alone read,” Frankie said.
Isabella scratched her nose with her middle finger but said nothing.
“Since Stone wasn’t here to hear your original pitch,” Ms. Birdie said, “explain a little about your proposal.”
Sophie clicked to the next screen. An image of the cover for Aggie the Horrible versus Max the Pompous Ass popped up. “In this book, the business tycoon hero has a meddling grandmother who has manipulated his need for a temporary assistant to push her latest matchmaking efforts upon him. As a result, he’s quite a total bosshole to the heroine, all in the hopes she will quit.”
Maybe Sophie should be a bosshole to Stone to get him to quit, should he decide to take the gig.
“Bosshole?” Stone asked.
“Nice word for asshole in charge,” Sophie explained. Who was she kidding? Life was too short to fake assholeness.
Stone rubbed the back of his neck, bringing her attention to his bandaged finger, but said nothing.
“My thought is to have Isabella do a podcast asking all of Manhattan to anonymously nominate their favorite bossholes with hero possibilities—given the right person—to be spotlighted in my column.”
“Hero possibilities?” Stone asked, frowning.
“Most men—abusers and narcissists absolutely excluded—can be salvaged if they’re willing and able to be educated on what it takes to be a living book boyfriend, a.k.a. a swoony hero.”
“Lucky them,” he said sarcastically.
She ignored his tone. “I’ll interview the nominees, weed out the stinkers”—she glanced at Stone—“and declare one a book-boyfriend match. Midway through the column’s run, Ms. Birdie has agreed that all the book boyfriends who have been discovered by that point will be required to participate in her annual bachelor auction. My Book Boyfriend Twins will go to the highest bidders.”
“Auction?” Stone asked.
“A charity auction,” Sophie said. “The money this year will go to Childhood Cancer Research.”
“I was so thrilled when I learned of your idea,” Ms. Birdie said. “I predict it will be our best fundraiser ever. A date night with your book boyfriend will sell out faster than any other auction we’ve ever hosted.”
“If this is the entirety of your plan,” Stone said. “I see no reason to be your bodyguard. You won’t need one, and I won’t take money that’s not earned.”
“Sophie, tell us a little about each type of man you will be scouring the five boroughs to find,” Ms. Birdie urged. “I do believe that will help Stone get a better grasp on just why it is you need protecting.”
Sophie nodded. “In the book Tangled, the boyfriend trope is a New York City playboy, so I’ll be on the hunt for one of those. The novel Funny Story requires me to find a living, breathing, lovable cinnamon roll.”
“A what roll?” Stone asked, his brow creasing.
“Cinnamon roll. Those are the nice guy heroes. They’re not broody, or snarly, or anything that is off-putting. Instead, they have a gooey heart and are just waiting for the right person to appreciate their niceness.”
“Good God,” he shuddered. “I pity the poor fucking man who gets described as a cinnamon roll. Could you be any more cruel to their ego?”
Sophie frowned. “I beg your pardon?”
For a moment, Stone looked confused by her outrage. Then he grimaced. “Pardon my language. I hope I’ve not offended your sensibilities.”
Sophie was plenty offended, but not by his language. “I’ll have you know my perfect match will be a cinnamon roll. While yes, I love reading about all the other types of heroes, when push comes to shove, give me a big teddy bear, and I’ll be superbly happy.”
He gave her a look of incredulity, glanced at her T-shirt, and then nodded as if his brain had suddenly been illuminated with blinding understanding. “Of course that’s what you would want in a man.”
She slapped her hands to her hips. “What does that mean?”
“It means…nothing. Forget I said anything. Please continue.”
Sophie clicked to the next screen with more force than necessary. Stone was getting on every one of her lifetime preserve of last nerves. By the time this meeting was over, she’d have no last nerves left for future frustrating situations. Which would leave her as one of those people who immediately overreacted with emotion instead of biting her tongue with patience. Like Frankie.
She took a breath. Don’t spiral.
“ Anyone But The Billionaire will have me scrutinizing all the single billionaires in search of one who likes to have fun. Falling for My Enemy will require me to find that super - smart geek who will make the right woman a perfect boyfriend. Single Dad on Top will have me searching out single dads. Made in Manhattan will send me to the seedier side of town looking for a guy from the wrong side of the tracks in need of a makeover. The Magnolia Chronicles requires me to find a bachelor who has been recently dumped and is on the rebound. And Most Eligible Billionaire requires me to take a look at the eligible billionaire list and find just the right grumpy one. Oh, and The Bride’s Runaway Billionaire— ”
Stone made a noise, and there went another of Sophie’s stock of last nerves. She waited for him to explain the context of the noise.
“What?” she finally snapped.
“I asked nothing,” he said looking at her like who pissed in your Cheerios?
You did, you big idiot. “You scoffed at my mention of searching out a grumpy bachelor. Why?”
“I’m picking up on this whole theme of billionaires. It appears that for a guy to be book boyfriend material he must be at billionaire status.”
“Book Boyfriend Connoisseurs read for the fantasy and the escape. Thus, we like our men, for the most part, filthy rich. So, sue us. Don’t tell me the women you fantasize about aren’t stacked and curvy and willing.”
He gave her a wolfish grin. “I’ll concede your point.”
She straightened. “ Things We Left Behind highlights a hero with a shady past. And Love Hacked has a hero with a secret. A really big secret.”
“That one will be fun,” Ms. Birdie said, a twinkle in her eyes. “Sophie will ask for nominees of guys who have secrets that they believe make them non-boyfriend material but are willing to share it with the person who buys him at auction. Isn’t that right, dear?”
Sophie nodded. “It might be a little tricky to find a guy who meets the dimensions of that type of book boyfriend, but that’s not going to sway me from hunting.”
“If you don’t mind, let’s back up one,” Stone said. “What do you mean a hero with a shady past?”
“Just that. The hero hasn’t always followed the law. And his current dealings may still be landing on the line.” As had Sophie’s last boyfriend who she’d thought was past that part of his life. Turned out…not so much.
“And just exactly where do you plan to look for such a man?”
“Wherever the listeners of Isabella’s podcast point us,” she replied, syrupy sweet. If he was going to deprive her of all her last nerves, she was going to send him home with a toothache from all her sugar.
“First of all, it’s not Isabella’s podcast,” Frankie mused. “It’s Naked Runway’s . Second of all, Stone, we’ve hired you to protect Sophie, not question her assignment.”
“I haven’t signed a contract yet,” Stone drawled. “I’m here to see if the gig is one I want to pursue.”
Frankie rolled her eyes. “In my opinion, Sophie should start with the sketchy hero. It’s the most exciting and will kick off our new column with a bang.”
Stone winced. “I’m certain you didn’t mean that as a pun, but from where I’m standing, it’s not funny.”
Sophie laughed. “Look at you having a sense of humor. You might be salvageable as a fake boyfriend after all.” She did shooting fingers at him. “Pew. Pew.”
“Again, I’ve not signed a contract,” Stone said. “Tell me more about this fake boyfriend thing you keep harping about.”
“Rude,” Sophie said. “I most definitely was not harping.”
Ms. Birdie stood. “Sophie, darling, you’ve done a wonderful job in your presentation. I agree with Frankie, you should start with the sketchy hero.” She pivoted to look at Stone. “Shall we discuss what it will take to get you to sign the contract? Clarabelle said you have done a lot of undercover work in the past couple of years, and doing so as a boyfriend would present no problems for a man of your talent. Was she wrong?”
“Of course I can. It’s just—do I want to?” Stone gave Sophie a less-than-sweet look. “I can’t imagine your real boyfriend would be happy with this plan.”
“I’m between, at the moment,” Sophie said. And by moment , she meant it had been six months.
“Still, I thought my purpose was to deter men from trying to take advantage of you. Why is it your wish I do so as your boyfriend and not simply as your bodyguard?”
“I think I can answer that,” Ms. Birdie said when Sophie didn’t immediately reply. “You see, as her boyfriend, you’ll not only deter gentlemen from getting handsy, but you’ll also deter them from hitting on her.”
“As in asking her out on a date?” Stone asked. “Would that be so bad?”
“Actually, it would. You see, we can’t have Sophie getting too chummy with any of her choices because they will need to remain eligible for the bachelor auction. It would be a shame if one of them was off the market when the event rolled around.”
“She’s a professional…or at least I assume she is if you hired her,” Stone replied. “I would think, as such, she can behave in a professional manner around the men she interviews and just say no to date opportunities.”
“Stone, darling, I get the feeling you’re here under duress,” Ms. Birdie said. “That is probably my fault, since I called in a favor with Clarabelle to have you help us out. If that’s the case, please just say so, and we will search out another to protect our Sophie. Clarabelle can repay the favor another day.”
“That won’t be necessary,” he said. “And please forgive my surliness. It appears that being out of commission has soured my normal cheerful position.”
It was Sophie’s turn to snort. “Please. Like anyone in this room believes you’re anything but what you’ve shown so far.” It was too bad he wasn’t a billionaire; he could be her grumpy billionaire candidate. Not that she got the feeling he was salvageable.
He raised a brow her way. “Is that your way of saying you’d prefer Naked Runway find another bodyguard?”
For more seconds than Sophie could track, they stared antagonistically at one another. “Let the record show, it’s my belief you will be the worst fake boyfriend in the history of fake boyfriends, but if you’re up for the challenge of going undercover as a guy I’d actually date, then sure, I’m all in. You?”
“Let’s do this,” he snapped.
Sophie swallowed hard. What in the devil had she been thinking, provoking him to say yes?
Isabella stood. “Frankie, how about we have the Glam Team give Stone a makeover to kick this off.”
“Oh, hell no,” Stone said, then grimaced. “I mean, no, thank you.”
“Isabella might have said it like it’s an option, but let me assure you it’s not,” Frankie said. “You will be repping Naked Runway . So of course you will be prettied up for the position.”
“It is standard operating procedure,” said Isabella. “Sophie, you mentioned a Cinnamon Roll hero was your type?”
Sophie tilted her head and eyeballed Stone. In what world could this bald hulk of a man be turned into any semblance of that kind of book hero? “I did.” She wrinkled her nose.
“If this boyfriend thing is nonnegotiable, I’d prefer to go undercover as the shady past hero,” Stone said.
“Sophie, are you okay with that?” Ms. Birdie asked.
“Truthfully, I’m not.” Sophie gave a fairly convincing sigh of regret. “It will be awkward enough pretending he’s my boyfriend, but I could never pull off pretending an attraction to that sort of man. It’s just not in my DNA.” She did a Vanna White gesture with her hands around the words on her T-shirt for emphasis.
“Then the Glam Team will have its work cut out for them, turning Stone into a sweetheart,” Frankie mused.
“This, I can’t wait to see,” Sophie said, smiling serenely at Stone.
“I just bet you can’t.” He gave her a hard stare. “But just remember, once I’m transformed, I expect you to sell it to the public that you can’t keep your hands off me.”
She grimaced. “I’m not an actress; I can’t just fake lust. You’re going to have to do your part as well.”
“Excellent point, both of you,” Ms. Birdie said. “I suggest—and it’s only a suggestion—why don’t the two of you take a week to get to know one another? If, at the end of that week, it’s determined you cannot pull off the fake boyfriend plan, then we will pivot…perhaps hire a female bodyguard to protect Sophie. She could go undercover as Sophie’s girlfriend”
“Or we could just dump the whole idea,” Frankie said. “It does seem to have a lot of potential pitfalls. I’d hate to invest a lot of money in a new project only to have it flop. It was bad enough that the prince bailed on us after only one year. Not to mention, I need her first column ASAP.”
Sophie gulped. “Please don’t cancel my column. I’m quite certain Stone and I can muster up some chemistry. Ms. Birdie’s idea to have us spend time together before duties commence is brilliant.” She glanced at Stone, willing him not to rain on her happiness. “Plus, I’m sure I can find a book boyfriend ASAP to kick off my feature column.”
Stone cleared his throat. “Did you say one of the book boyfriend tropes you were in search of was a New York City playboy?”
Sophie nodded.
“I can hook you up with one of those,” he said, a wicked grin lifting his lips.
“Stone, if you’re thinking of who I’m thinking, you’re diabolically brilliant,” Ms. Birdie said.
“Ryder,” Stone replied.
Frankie gave an evil laugh. “You’re suggesting we feature Isabella’s last-lover-before-marriage, your brother, for our first column?”
Stone nodded.
“I love it,” Frankie said, glancing at Isabella with raised eyebrows as if daring her to veto the idea.
“He was never my lover,” Isabella snapped. “And I don’t think you can call him a playboy.”
“Agree to disagree,” Stone said quietly. “Last week he had three dates in one day.”
“Oh.” Isabella looked a little sad at the revelation.
Sophie jumped in before another disagreement could escalate between the two editors. She’d find out more about the soap opera playing out in front of her later. Right now, she wanted to seal the deal. “Excellent. I have a guy for my first column, and it sounds like Stone’s on board to spend a week getting to know me.”
“Is she right?” Frankie asked him.
He nodded curtly. “Just as long as our daydreamer here can assure me she will keep all feelings to herself,” Stone added. “I’m not looking for a real-life professional daydreamer girlfriend.”
“As if my heart would ever get excited about the likes of you.” Her heart might be filled with daydreams of butterflies and joy, but it wasn’t stupid. It knew when to protect itself, and if ever there was a reason to protect, it would be against Stone.
As if reading her thoughts, he gave her an assessing look that made her just a little bit scared. Damn, he had the whole enforcer persona down to an art. Not good. Not good at all for her plans to sweet talk men into agreeing to the part of real-life book boyfriend hero and go to the highest bidder at auction. Then again, imperfect plans were better than none.
Weren’t they?
Or had her lovely pitch just become what grandfather liked to call FUBAR?
Fucked up beyond all recognition!