Chapter 14 Juniper
FOURTEEN
JUNIPER
Cassie yanks a sequined tree skirt off the rack and holds it up like a prize. “Yay or nay?”
I blink at it, then at her. “What?”
Cassie narrows her eyes. “That’s what I thought. You’re barely here right now. Earth to Juniper. What happened? You look like you got hit by a Hallmark truck full of unresolved tension.”
I open my mouth, then close it. My lips tingle. I can still feel it. Feel him.
“Okay, don’t freak out,” I say—which is exactly the kind of sentence that makes Cassie drop everything she’s holding.
“Oh my god. You kissed Liam.”
“No! I mean…technically, he kissed me. But only to steal candy from my mouth. So, it doesn’t count. Except…it kind of does.” I groan. “It was—”
“Hot.” Cassie finishes for me, a wicked grin pulling at the corners of her mouth.
“Yes,” I whisper, glancing around like the Christmas tree décor aisle might be bugged. “Ridiculously hot. Like, I forgot what year it was. My knees went soft. And then I kissed him back. To steal it back.”
“You kissed him back?” she practically shrieks.
“No, I kissed him. Like, leaned in, full mouth, took the candy, maybe moaned a little. God, it was insanely hot.” My lips twitch. “He looked wrecked.”
Seeing the absolute torture on his face took some of the sting out of what happened a year ago. If there was a scorecard, I’ve got a fresh tick next to my name.
I fan my face. My skin still burns.
Cassie drops the tree skirt in the cart. “Juni. You minx.”
“Don’t give me that look. It wasn’t supposed to happen. I was just being flirty. I mean it was petty revenge-flirty. And then he kissed me like I was something he’d been dying to taste again.”
Cassie’s eyes go wide. “Did you kiss for real-real?”
I exhale. “It felt real. Which is the problem.”
Because now every cell in my body hums when he’s near.
I woke up this morning with my lips still swollen, my heart thudding too hard every time I thought about how his fingers slid along my jaw.
How close he’d gotten. How I almost forgot everything I’m supposed to protect when it comes to Liam. Like my barely mended heart.
And then, the kicker.
“This morning,” I say, voice dropping. “There were cherry swirl candies in my advent calendar.”
Cassie blinks. “Like the candy he stole from your mouth?”
I nod. “Exact same kind. And I didn’t put them there. You didn’t either, right?”
“Unless I blacked out during our Christmas movie marathon last week.” She arches a brow. “You think it was him? Like, he’s been sneak-gifting you?”
“I don’t know. But it feels like too much of a coincidence.”
What I don’t say: If Liam is behind the advent calendar, then maybe he didn’t just walk away last year. Maybe he’s been here the whole time. Wanting. Regretting. Taking action now.
But if I let myself believe that, and I’m wrong? It’ll wreck me.
“I just—” I stop. “If it’s him, what does it mean? Is it a game? Does he regret rejecting me? Or is it just fun?”
Cassie wraps her arm around my shoulders. “Do you want it to mean something?”
That’s the thing. I’m not sure. But my stupid heart already does.
“I—”
“A little advice from someone who’s weathered the Liam Hargrove crush and all its aftermath with you?” Cassie says, voice soft but fierce. “Don’t overthink it.”
I blink. “That’s your advice?”
Cassie nods solemnly. “Yes. Because I’ve seen you spiral. And that’s not what we’re doing this year.
“Juni.” She squeezes my shoulder. “You don’t have to solve him. Or label this. Or build a ten-year plan. Maybe it’s not about figuring out if he’s your forever.”
I hesitate. “Then what is it about?”
“It’s about you wanting him. Remember? A year ago, you were okay with just sex. And clearly, he wants you now. So maybe, just let it be fun. No expectations.”
“No expectations.” I repeat it, tasting the words. They feel foreign, dangerous, and kind of delicious. I let out a slow breath. “You think I can do that?”
“Get what you want, Juni. And if he leaves again, make sure he doesn’t take anything with him you weren’t willing to give.”
I nod, more to convince myself than anything.
No strings. No plans. Just stolen kisses and bad decisions wrapped in tinsel. I can survive that…right?
After I finish shopping with Cassie, I drop her off at her parents’, then drive over to my family’s house.
This year is different in many ways. The fact I’m not living at home anymore, but also with Jasper and Stella together now, it will forever change the landscape of our family holidays.
Luckily, Stella’s family lives across the street so there’s no need for them to commit to one family vs.
the other when it comes to spending time for holidays and special occasions.
And, I love seeing Jasper happy, but I miss our time together. Just two siblings teasing each other.
I swing open the back door of my parents’ house with a box of decorations balanced on my hip, only to find Jasper at the kitchen table, intently looking at his laptop like a man possessed.
“Please tell me you’re not working,” I say, nudging the door closed with my foot.
“I’m not,” he says without looking up. “Well, not technically.”
I round the kitchen island to squint at his screen. “Are you seriously looking at wedding venues?”
He finally glances up, pushing his glasses up his nose. “Don’t judge me.”
I set the box down with a thud. “I’m not judging. I’m just deeply impressed by the speed at which you’ve become that guy.”
“What guy?”
“The guy who makes a wedding Pinterest board before the proposal glitter has even settled.”
Jasper scoffs. “This is practical. If we don’t start looking now, we’ll end up getting married next to a gas station in off-season Wyoming.”
I lean on the counter, grinning. “I mean, Stella would make a stunning bride in front of a convenience store slushie machine.”
“She said I could browse,” he mutters. “As long as I don’t do anything until after Christmas. She doesn’t want to steal focus from the holiday stuff.”
“Wow. Who knew you’d be the eager one in this relationship?”
“I contain multitudes,” he says dryly.
For a second, it’s easy. Just me and Jasper doing our usual sibling banter. But then I glance at his face—the one that’s known me through every awkward phase, every heartbreak.
Which makes me wonder what he would think about me and Liam.
Casually, of course. Like Cassie and I decided.
Maybe casual means I don’t even need to bring it up with Jasper.
I’ve never said a word about my crush on Liam to him.
And if Liam and I started hooking up, it’s not like I’m going to steal my brother’s best friend away from him.
He leans back, stretching his arms overhead. “What brings you by?”
“Mom wanted the vintage Santa mugs. I had them at the store.” I pause, then add casually, “Thought I’d say hi.”
“Hi,” he says, brow lifting. “And?”
“And what?”
“You’ve got your Juniper face on.”
I cross my arms. “What face is that?”
“The one that says ‘I have a secret, and I’m trying really hard not to let you pry it out of me.’”
I roll my eyes. “You’re imagining things.”
He tilts his head. “Does this have anything to do with a certain Liam Hargrove?”
“What? No.” My stomach flips. “Why would it?”
“Well, for starters, you’ve mentioned him approximately zero times despite the fact that he’s literally staying in your apartment.”
“Not by choice.”
He grins. “I know. But I know you, Juni. And I know you don’t let just anyone share your space, especially after what happened last year.”
“What happened last year?” I feign innocence.
“You and Liam kissed.”
“He told you that?”
“Yeah. Then I promptly told him to never mention touching my sister ever again.”
I snort. “Good talk.”
“It was Hargrove-style emotional cowardice,” he says, then softens. “But I also know he regrets it.”
I blink. “How do you know that?”
“Because we talk. And because I wouldn’t have let him stay with you if I didn’t think he deserved a shot to make it right.”
My breath catches. “You—what?”
“I gave him the green light,” he says simply. “But I told him he’d have to earn it. Earn you.”
I glance down at the countertop, suddenly fascinated by a chip in the ceramic tile.
“He messed up,” Jasper continues. “You put yourself out there, and he got scared. But I also know he’s been carrying that regret around for a year. I’ve never seen him like this, Juni.”
I look up. “Like what?”
Jasper smirks. “Like a man who knows what he wants and is scared to death of not getting a second chance.”
I swallow hard, the ache in my chest doing battle with the warmth blooming in my stomach.
“You could’ve told me,” I say, quieter now. “That he talked to you.”
He shrugs. “Would it have changed anything?”
Maybe. Maybe not.
But now I know Liam didn’t just show up on a whim. He planned this. Thought it through. Talked to my brother.
And Jasper let him in.
Which means now…I have to decide if I will, too.
The room quiets for a beat.
“I don’t know if I’m—” I start.
“You don’t have to be anything,” he interrupts. “Just don’t write him off before he’s had a chance to show you he’s not the same guy who left last year.”
I nod slowly, heart thudding in my chest.
He points a finger at me. “And if he screws it up again—”
“I’ll kill him,” I finish.
Jasper laughs. “Not if I get to him first.”
I smile, but there’s a tremor in my chest I can’t quite hide.