Chapter 13 #2
Julien didn’t like the deprecating sound of her voice. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Well, the obvious.” She waved her hand between them as if that was answer enough.
Which, no. What was obvious? Obviously it wasn’t a date because they were two people working together, strictly professional? Or obviously it wasn’t a date because she would never go for someone like him?
He was working on coming up with a way to have her clarify that wouldn’t make her uncomfortable in case the answer was the latter.
As much as he didn’t want to hear that he wasn’t her type, he didn’t want to put her in a position where she had to say it to his face.
But that would make the former reason—the fact he was in a position of authority in the workplace over her—even more awkward.
Was there a vague way he could word his question and still get the information he desperately wanted to know?
“Also,” she continued, unaware of his internal struggle, “this place is incongruent with my dating history. Do you even know where my last date took place?”
“Uh.” Was that a rhetorical question or was he supposed to answer? “No?”
“It was in my living room. Over Zoom.”
Julien poured himself a glass of water. “You had a date over Zoom?”
“It’s post-COVID. A lot of things happen over Zoom now. In this case, I’m glad the date was virtual instead of in person.” She gave a full-body shudder.
“I’m almost afraid to ask what happened.”
“Oh, you should be. You definitely should be.”
“But—”
“Don’t say but.” She shook her head so hard, her hair, which had at least doubled in size, her tight curls frizzy and wild, slapped her cheeks with each rotation. “Anything but . . . butt.”
Julien leaned back in his chair, trying in vain to push down his amusement and not let the grin form on his lips. “Now I have to hear this story.”
“Okay, however—” she stressed the word, making it known she hadn’t said but—“I did warn you.” She sat up straighter and leaned forward, her eyes bright. “So, you know how during the era of Zoom meetings everyone was all business on top and casual on the bottom?”
He nodded. “The mullet of the work ensemble.”
“Exactly. Well, this guy . . .” She chewed on her bottom lip. “Well, let’s just say, if this guy were in plumber school, he would’ve gotten an award for the most visible crack.”
“Too low-slung PJ bottoms, huh?” Julien exaggerated a wince to commiserate with her.
She went back to shaking her head. “Oh no. I wish that were the case. If you can believe it, somehow, someway, he had forgotten to even wear bottoms. At least that’s what I had initially thought at the time.”
Julien choked on his sip of water. He had to grab his napkin and wipe the dribble off his chin. “How does someone forget pants?”
“I don’t know! My brain was malfunctioning from shock. I wouldn’t have even known except he didn’t realize he had a mirror on the wall behind his desk chair that gave me way too much of a view of the sunny side of his moon.”
Julien’s mouth unhinged. “No.” Martha was being way too kind, offering the excuse the guy had simply forgotten the bottom half of his wardrobe.
The more likely scenario was far less absent-mindedness and a lot more intentional sexual harassment.
Was this really what women had to wade through in the dating pool?
“I wish I was lying.”
“What did you do?” Hopefully gave him a dressing-down he wouldn’t forget, followed by reporting him to the authorities.
She shrugged. “I was too shocked and embarrassed to say anything. In hindsight, I realize he was probably just a disgusting creep, but like I said, the whole thing completely threw me for a loop. A person doesn’t expect butt cracks on Zoom!
I should have immediately logged off, but instead, I put on every song I could think of that had the word moon in it.
‘Shame on the Moon,’ ‘Talking to the Moon’—”
“‘The Whole of the Moon’?” Julien offered.
“No, but that would’ve been a good one. After averting my gaze and him not picking up my subtle hints nor seeing his reflection in the image on the screen, I finally came to my senses and made up some emergency and ended the call.
” She shuddered as she picked her menu back up.
“So, yeah. That’s the kind of dates I’m used to. ”
Julien forced a smile, hoping to make her feel better. “Aw, come on. They can’t all have been that bad.”
She peeked at him over the top of her menu and raised one brow.
He lifted his hands in surrender. “My mistake. Maybe they could be.” He glanced down at his own menu. “So, what would be your idea of a perfect date?”
Remember that line, King? Yeah, you’re toeing it big-time, buddy.
Martha shrugged. “Is a good meal and a stroll through a bookstore too cliché?”
“No. It sounds nice, actually.” Really, really nice.
He’d have to tuck the information away for later. In the meantime, he’d have to figure out a way to forget the writing conference had set up a bookstore in their hotel. Selective amnesia wasn’t a thing, was it?
He sighed. The next few days were going to be even more difficult than he’d imagined.