Chapter 17
Chapter Seventeen
DHRITHI
Dhrithi sat up in her hospital bed, unaided. It was a small win but a win, nonetheless. After yesterday’s confrontation, her parents had stormed out of her hospital room, and they hadn’t come back yet. She wished she could say she was upset about it but the only emotion she felt about it was relief. Without her parents hounding her to squat in her in laws house in hopes of scavenging whatever money she could from Varun’s inheritance, Dhrithi could think and plan.
First, she needed a place to stay. She unlocked her phone and scrolled through her contacts. Varun had only ever allowed her friendships with the depth of a puddle and so finding someone to help her now was going to be tricky. And still, if there was one thing Varun had never done, it was keep her short of money. He’d deposited a healthy allowance into her bank account every month and Dhrithi had saved most of it. So, if she couldn’t find a friend, she’d buy one.
Buy a friend.
Her thumb paused over a name as the last thought filtered through her mind. Appalled, she realised that the years spent with her parents and Varun had apparently managed a level of brainwashing she hadn’t been consciously aware of. Disgusted with herself, she dropped the phone on the bed and stared at the wall in front of her. The water seepage was spreading through the walls, she noted, the stain larger and darker than before. A lot like the stain on her life, on her very soul itself.
She felt dirty. She felt tired and hopeless and disgusted with herself. But mostly, Dhrithi just felt sad.
The door opened and a nurse entered with a tray. The contents in the tray rattled as she placed it on the table beside Dhrithi’s bed.
“Lie down,” the unsmiling woman said.
Dhrithi didn’t bother arguing. She lay down and turned on her side, allowing the woman to swab her hip and inject her.
Her mind wandered back to her problems. A hotel, she thought. Or a service apartment? She logged on to a few websites and started surfing them as the woman bustled around behind her doing God knows what.
“What are you looking at?”
The gruff voice startled her into dropping her phone. She winced as it clattered to the floor. Amay bent, scooped it up, glancing at the screen with a massive frown and then handing it to her.
“Why are you looking at a service apartment rental ad?”
“Probably because I need a service apartment to rent,” she answered flippantly, not meeting his eyes. She turned on her back, raised the side of her hospital gown a little and asked, “Do you need to check my dressing, Doctor?”
“Dr. Raina has already seen to that, hasn’t she?” Amay’s frown was thunderous.
Dr. Raina had which begged the question… “So, why are you here now?”
Shouldn’t he also march off like everyone else who professed to love her? Love. A scoffing sound escaped her. People only loved her when she did what they asked of her. They only loved her when she was an obedient, convenient, little tool for their larger ambitions.
Amay listened to something the nurse was saying, his head tilted attentively towards her. He nodded before turning back to Dhrithi. “Did Dr. Raina tell you about-“
“The psychiatric consult I’ve been scheduled for?” Dhrithi interrupted, her bitterness leaking through in her tone. “She did. It’s set for later this evening.”
“At five. Yes, I know.”
“Then why are you here?” she asked again. “Or is interrogating me your new hobby?”
“Once you clear the psych consult,” he said, watching her closely. “You’ll get discharged in a day or two. You’ll get to go home.”
Home.
The word had acrid tears stinging her eyes. She had no home. She hadn’t had one in years. She had a prison cell which the police were going to be tearing apart soon. She had parents who didn’t want her crossing their threshold if she lost her cash cow status in their eyes. She had in laws who didn’t want her crossing their threshold in case she was a leech intending to suck them dry.
So, Amay could discharge her and go to his home from the hospital but Dhrithi knew she’d be going anywhere but home.
“Okay.” It was the only thing she could say out loud. Amay didn’t need to hear about her problems. She’d lost the right to confide in him a long time ago.
After a beat of uncomfortable silence, Amay said, “Okay then. I just came by to-“ he stopped talking, seemingly at a loss for words.
Dhrithi turned to look at him, one eyebrow raised in challenge. “To?” she asked.
“To tell you that,” he finished, rubbing one hand through his hair in a gesture so reminiscent of the boy she’d known through her schooldays, the boy he’d once been, that Dhrithi’s throat seized with emotion, making any further speech impossible.
"I'll go then," he said, taking her silence for hostility.
Dhrithi nodded, unable to get a word out. Her grief over the ‘what ifs’ in her life were too strong for words. Amay was almost to the door before he stopped. He took a deep breath, his shoulders seemingly dropping in defeat. He turned back to face her, his hands going to his hips as he stared her down.
“Where are your parents, Dhrithi?”
She shrugged. “Probably at their home.”
His brows lowered into a ferocious frown. “Nobody’s staying with you tonight? Friends? Family?”
She shrugged again. “I’m almost fully healed, remember? I don’t need anybody to stay at the hospital with me.”
Silence met her answer. He continued to stand there, hands on his hips, glowering at her like she’d committed some cardinal sin.
“Nobody ever needs anything,” he said finally, his quiet voice slicing through her shaky bravado. “Doesn’t mean we don’t want it anyway.”
Dhrithi shut her eyes, shutting him out. “I don’t want them staying with me either. If there’s nothing else, Doctor, I’d like to rest now.”
She heard him sigh, a weighty exhale that seemed to balloon through the still silence of the room.
“Dhrithi-“
“Go away, Amay,” she whispered. “Don’t dig through the debris of my life. It won’t do either of us any good.”
She heard the door open and shut a second later. She didn’t need to look to know he’d left. She always knew when the space around her didn’t include Amay Aatre.