Chapter 7 #4
“Interesting,” I mutter to myself.
“What’s interesting?”
I run my hand over her back, feeling the soft exposed skin and wishing I could kiss every inch of it. “I didn’t know I was capable of jealousy.”
“I’m sure a guy like you never had a reason to be jealous. I’m guessing you’ve always had the hottest girl on your arm.”
There’s something in her tone, and when I pull back and tip her chin up, I search her face, trying to understand what she’s feeling.
“I’ve never had a girl on my arm,” I tell her.
“Okay,” she says, and it’s the most sarcastic sound I’ve ever heard in my life.
“I don’t understand. Why are you upset?”
“I’m not upset,” she says, but it’s obvious she is.
I may not be able to understand emotions all that well, but I can read people, and everything about the way she’s looking, from her clenched jaw to the way her right hand is clutched in a fist, is screaming at me that she’s pissed, but fuck if I know why.
“Don’t lie to me, Cyn. Tell me what’s wrong.”
She looks like she’s about to insist she’s not upset, but then thinks better of it and says, “This is obviously a game to you, and I don’t want to play anymore.”
“What game do you think I’m playing?”
I watch her like I’m trying to work out a puzzle, determined to put the pieces together and force this to make sense.
“Is this a joke? If I didn’t know any better, I’d swear you were one of those Alpha assholes and that this was all some practical joke to make me look stupid.”
The best I can manage is a stunned, “Huh?”
“Stop pretending,” she practically yells at me. “There’s no way in hell that a guy like you would go after a girl like me. There,” she says, waving a hand at me. “Happy now?”
This girl has an effortless way of making me feel like a giant dumbass. Even though I know it’s going to expose my ignorance, I can’t resist saying it again. “I don’t understand.”
She lets out an exasperated sigh, and if this were any other situation, I’d laugh. “Can you just leave?”
I do laugh then and shake my head. “Not a chance in hell, krovinka.”
“What does that word mean? I haven’t learned it yet.”
“Good,” I tell her. “Don’t look it up. I’ll tell you when the time is right, and I’m not leaving. I told you I would wait for you, and I meant it.”
“You have a virginity kink,” she asks. “Is that what this is?”
“I have a feeling I have a lot of kinks, but since I’ve never had sex, I have no idea. I’ll let you know as we discover them together.”
Her mouth drops open in surprise, but then she smiles and shakes her head. “You almost got me with that one. Nicely done, but please leave.”
I ignore her dismissal and say, “Wait, I do have one. I really like my blood on you. That’s probably not a normal one, and you might want to prepare yourself because I have a feeling most of mine won’t be normal.”
She looks like she’s about to argue with me, but then she looks at my hand and realizes it’s still bleeding. “You need a bandage for that.”
“It’s just a nick. It’ll be fine.”
This time it’s her turn to ignore me. She turns and walks back to her desk, digging around until she pulls out a small pouch. Motioning for me to sit on her bed, she unzips it and gets out a small tube of Neosporin and a couple of Band-Aids.
Even though she clearly still doesn’t believe me, her touch is gentle when she grabs my hand and squeezes some of the ointment onto my finger.
“You need to clean this better when you get home, but it’ll work for now.”
I watch as she sticks a couple of Band-Aids on me, and when I see they’re pink with multi-colored dots on them, I can’t help but grin.
“Very manly,” I tell her.
She shrugs and zips her pouch back up. “You’re tough enough to pull it off.”
Before she can walk way, I grab her waist and pull her onto my lap. She’s stiff in my arms, but I don’t let it deter me. I squeeze her tighter and kiss her forehead.
“I have never lied to you, Cyn. This may come as a shock to you, but I’m not exactly normal.
I’ve never once been interested in a woman before, or anyone for that matter, men or women.
Nothing appealed to me, but then I saw you.
” I brush her thick hair aside and kiss the curve of her neck, instantly growing hard again beneath her ass.
“I don’t know what you’ve done to me,” I admit, “but I can’t stop thinking about you. ”
When she starts to wiggle, I ask, “Do you feel that?”
“It’s pretty hard to miss.”
I smile against her skin and nip at her earlobe. “I’ve been like this pretty much nonstop since the night I saw you give Chort a treat.”
She turns her head in surprise. “You saw me that night?”
“I did. I had my first sex dream after that.”
“I don’t know what to say about that. I still find it hard to believe.”
I shrug and kiss the spot right behind her ear. “That may be so, but it’s still true. By the way, Chort is one of the most vicious dogs I’ve ever met. I found him close to a year ago, and it took weeks before I could get him to stop trying to rip my throat out.”
She laughs and shakes her head. “Now I know you’re lying.”
“I am not. He’s come a long way, but he has never once been friendly with anyone without first taking months to get to know them.” I give her skin another soft nip. “It seems my little Cyn is good at taming wild things.”
“Why do you call me little? I’m not little.”
“You’re over a foot shorter than me,” I remind her.
“I’m short,” she corrects, “but I’m not little.”
“You’re little to me,” I say with a shrug.
When my phone buzzes, I lift up enough so I can pull it out of my pocket. Mia’s face pops up with her text, asking if I can meet her and Damien at the club in thirty minutes. I type a quick reply, knowing the Russian is too fast for Cyn to catch.
“She’s really pretty,” she says, making no attempt to hide the fact that she was looking.
“I’m glad I’m not the only one with a jealousy issue,” I tell her, and then add, “She’s my little sister.”
Cyn tries to hide her smile and fails, but it dies when I say, “I need to go in a few minutes.”
“So is this how it’s going to work? You sneak into my room wearing a mask, get me all confused and riled up, and then leave after getting a text? I’m not so sure I’m okay with that.”
I grin over at her. “You’re all riled up?”
She can’t help but laugh. “You know I am. Seriously, though, this can’t work like this. I don’t know anything about you.”
“You know more than most.”
“That’s not enough. I need more, and I’d like to see your entire face.”
“You will, but not today, not when I have to leave so quickly.” I rest my hand on her thigh, stroking her bare skin with my thumb, amazed at how soft she feels.
She’s so fragile, yet I have no desire to break her.
“I just gave you my first kiss,” I remind her.
“You know me better than anyone in many ways.”
Her green eyes search mine. “Are you serious?”
“Yes.” With my thumb still grazing her skin, I ask, “Were you serious when you said you were a virgin?”
“Yeah.”
That red ball of fire settles into my gut again when I ask, “But it wasn’t your first kiss?”
“Well, no,” she starts to say, and I close my eyes as she finishes with, “I had a boyfriend in high school.”
I’m new to jealousy, so I’m not sure what’s normal and what’s not, but I do know the vast majority of people have at least kissed, and usually done a lot more than that by the time they hit college, but knowing it’s true and knowing it’s true for my Cyn are two very different things.
Not sure what else to do, I rest my chin on her shoulder and kiss her neck before saying, “Don’t ever tell me his name unless you want him to die at my hands.”
I may not know a lot of things, but I do know myself, and I know with absolute certainty that if she ever gives me his name, I will be unable to stop myself from finding him and sinking my blade deep into his chest. We all have our limits.
She is obviously mine. Anyone who touches her is dead.
End of story. My brain doesn’t seem to care if it’s a good touch or a bad one or past or present.
It all gets muddled into one thing and one thing only—someone else putting their hands on my girl and then my need to kill them for it.
“I sometimes forget what you’re capable of,” she says, and then she turns so she can cup my face and look at me.
“I’m an idiot for sitting here, for not calling the police, for not screaming my head off, and Jesus Christ for kissing you like I did.
I’m going to end up on the evening news, aren’t I? ”
“No, I would never let any harm come to you. I know it’s hard to understand, but if it makes you feel any better, you’re very clearly on the do not kill side of things.”
“Oh, well okay then,” she says, making her earlier sarcastic comment sound positively heartfelt and truthful.
“I’m incapable of hurting you,” I say. “I don’t know how else to explain it.”
“What if that changes?”
“It won’t,” I tell her, knowing in my gut it’s true. “You’ll learn to trust it. I promise you will, but it’s going to take time.”
“Tell me your name. I want to at least know your name before you leave.”
I tilt my head and look at her, knowing there’s no reason not to. I’m in too deep, and if I had time, I’d pull my mask off and let her see all of me. For now, though, my name will have to do.
“Sasha,” I tell her.
She smiles at hearing it and leans in closer so our faces are almost touching. “Nice to meet you, Sasha.”