Chapter 36
36
S ean woke alone in his bed. He rubbed his eyes, reached over and felt the side of the bed where Gloria had been. It had already cooled.
He inhaled deeply and let it out in a whoosh. He slowly rolled to the side, pleased the soreness wasn't as bad as it had been yesterday. Progress. He scraped his hands through his hair as he stumbled to the bathroom. A quick look in the mirror had him wincing slightly. He rubbed his hands through his hair to tame the sleep rumpled locks. He needed a haircut, but he was also thinking about growing it out a bit. On the road it was difficult to find the time and a good stylist to cut their hair. Jami had grown his out for that reason. And the women swooned over it.
He went in search of Gloria and found her sitting outside on the deck, the sun was shining and her hair gleamed. She had a cup of coffee in her hand, and she stared out at the landscaping.
He grinned and prepared a cup of coffee for himself, then grabbed the pot and sauntered to the door. Sliding it open, she turned and smiled.
He held up the pot. "Do you need a refill?"
She smiled, "Thank you, yes."
He poured coffee into her cup, the aroma wafting up to his nostrils.
It was humid at this time of the morning, it would be a stifling day today. The weather on his phone predicted it would be in the high nineties.
He carried the coffee pot back inside. As he stepped out onto the deck, the warmth on his bare feet confirmed it would be a hot one. He sat on the love seat next to her.
Her legs were propped up on the metal coffee table and he mimicked her style. He wore a pair of shorts and so did she. He stared at the contrast in the coloring of their legs. His only looked darker because he had dark hair on his. Hers were smooth and shone in the sunshine. Her skin was olive in tone and she tanned easily. She still had fantastic legs.
He reached over and touched her thigh and ran his hand up and down. Her skin was soft, and smooth. He'd always remembered the way her skin felt against his. The memories of her legs wrapped around his waist as he was inside of her came to the forefront of his mind. Those were the best times for sure.
"You still have the legs of a twenty-year-old, Gloria."
She burst out laughing, "You have got to be kidding me."
He chuckled, "No, I'm not. You have nice legs, you always did."
He inhaled deeply to get his cock from making a strong appearance and pulled his hand away. He drank his coffee and stared out at the landscaping as Gloria had just been doing.
"Did you get some songs written last night?"
"Well, I got the words out that I wanted to get out, and we'll fine-tune it some today. But I think I've got the makings of three or four good songs. I just need to work out the melodies and then bring the band's parts into it."
"Do you like that process, Sean? Do you like writing the songs better than singing or do you like both equally?"
He shrugged slightly. "It's hard to say which I like the most. I do love the creative process of writing. And since Jami and I opened up that avenue for ourselves, we both have found it much more enjoyable, maybe even than performing. But it's the performing that pays the bills."
She turned her head to him and smiled. "Not always. There are a lot of famous stars who have written songs for others."
He nodded slightly. "Yeah, I guess you're right there."
"Just don't discount the fact that you could write for others and still write for yourself and perform. There's more than one avenue. Diversifying is pretty smart, don't you think?"
He chuckled. "I always thought you'd be a better businessperson than me."
She shook her head. "I don't know that I'm better at business. Sometimes when you step away, you can see the picture from the outside looking in, you can see it differently than the artist does."
"I suppose."
They sat in silence for a while. The birds squawked loudly. Their chirping and singing interrupted the silence of the morning, but it was peaceful.
They sipped their coffee together, not saying much of anything for a long time.
Gloria finally turned her head and said to him, "I do want you to know that I am sorry. I've been mad at myself since I first saw you on Friday and I saw the hurt on your face. And I guess all these years of being so hurt by you breaking up with me, I had forgotten the fact that you would be so hurt to not know you had a daughter. I reasoned it away and justified that you didn't even want me. You certainly didn't want a daughter. And that's unforgivable. I should have at least given you that choice. If you had decided then that you couldn't handle both of us, that would have been a different story. And at least you would have had the option. So I want you to know, I apologize." She swallowed and took a deep breath. "I know it doesn't change it, but I am deeply sorry."
He swallowed the lump in his throat. He opened his mouth to say something, but his lips quivered.
He closed his mouth, bit his bottom lip, and took a few deep breaths to get himself under control. The emotions were so raw and so sharp at the surface. He waited a few moments and turned his head to look at Gloria. She was beautiful in the morning, the sun shining on her, her dark hair still shone in the sun, so nice. She had a few strands of gray hair at her temples and he thought she'd be striking with all gray hair. Someday they'd both be old and gray. Her brown eyes still so beautiful. Only when he looked at them now, he saw sadness in them and regret.
"I am deeply sorry, Gloria, for how things went down between us. I shouldn't have broken up with you. I should have given you the opportunity to make your own decisions. I took that away from you. And I'm sorry I hurt you so badly."
He inhaled a deep breath. "If it's any consolation, I hurt myself just as badly. The decisions made back then, I made them for us and didn't bring you to the table. And so for that, I'm deeply sorry. And I hope you can forgive me."
He saw a tear slide down her cheek. She sniffed lightly. He saw her throat move when she swallowed. Her lips quivered. When she opened her mouth, he could tell she was holding back a sob.
Her lips quivered. "I forgive you."
He nodded. "I forgive you too."
He reached over, placed his arm around her shoulders, and scooted toward her so they were sitting hip to hip. She laid her head on his shoulder, and both of them had a cleansing cry.
They sat in silence for a long time, getting their emotions under control, thinking about all that had gone on. The stupid decisions both had made that had altered their lives so dramatically.
And then he inhaled a deep, shaky breath and let it out slowly, "If we can be in agreement that from this point forward, we stop blaming and start working. I think we can get through this."
She nodded her head and swallowed. "I can agree to that."
He kissed the top of her head, laid his cheek where his lips had just been, and they sat quietly a little while longer.
His stomach growled a short time later, and he chuckled. "I guess we better find some food and then go pick up our girl."