44. Aiden #2
“I was miserable without you,” I say. That’s the simple truth. I straighten and exhale. “I played like shit for months. Didn’t talk to anyone. Hell, it took me two years to go on a date.”
And it was a horrific experience. Touching another person never got easier. Yet I had no choice.She left me. Didn’t want me. That’s what I thought.
She sucks in a breath. “I went the opposite direction. Kissed all the wrong people, hoping I’d forget you. Hoping it would hurt a little less. But I—” She shakes her head. “I don’t think I ever did.”
“I know I never did.”
She shakes her head and whimpers. “Aiden,” she says, the word a plea. “You were engaged.”
I sigh, but it’s not in aggravation anymore. Or sadness. I’m exhausted. Tired of the lies. Tired of holding it together all the time.
The truth spills out of me like an old, rusted faucet. It spurts ugliness and then gushes, purging the years of half-truths and lies until nothing but clear, pure honesty flows through.
“Because my brothers wouldn’t stop bothering me about my obvious crush on you.
I ran into the damn wall the first time I saw you back in Boston.
The second time, I threw up. They were onto me, but after the devastation I lived in when you broke up with me, I figured it would be easier to marry someone I didn’t feel that way about.
She couldn’t hurt me if I didn’t love her, right? ”
Tears well in Lennox’s eyes. “You really didn’t love her?” she whispers. There’s hope laced amidst the sadness.
“How could I when my heart still belonged to you? I’ve never loved anyone but you.
If you’d stayed, I would have only ever kissed you.
If you’d have let me, I would have been your one and only, and I’d have worn that title proudly.
” I smile ruefully. “Hell, I probably would have been insufferable about it. Matching T-shirts and everything.”
The tears fall then, rolling down her cheeks, even as she breaks into a smile. “Idiot.”
I move closer, cupping her face and brushing away the tears that continue to fall.
“I’d be your idiot any day of the week. Forever.
I’m stupid in love with you, Lex. I always have been.
There’s no reason for you to ever be jealous or insecure.
You’re the only person I see. The only person who truly makes me smile.
Even in the darkness. And though I can’t be your only kiss, I’ll take being your last. I think I could wear that title proudly. ”
Eyes shining, she gives me a watery smile. “I’d really like that kiss now, Hockey Boy.”
With her cheeks still cradled in my palms, I tilt her head back and press my lips to hers.
It’s electric, our connection. It always is.
But in this moment, it feels like we’re sharing our first kiss.
Like a beginning and yet also like coming home.
There’s a comfort in knowing the truth. In laying it all on the line and opening up my heart.
No longer do I have to hold back and pretend that I’m not head over heels for her. I don’t have to play a game or act in any sort of role. We’re living in this moment, and though I have no idea what the future holds, I know that we have right now. And right now, she’s mine completely.
“I have another confession,” I whisper against her mouth, holding her in place.
She exhales, her breath skating over my lips.
“I stole your phone and cloned it. I’ve been following along with your stalker romance as you read it.”
Her lashes flutter and her brows dip. “What?”
“I’m crazy. Yes.” I shrug, going for nonchalant, even as my heart rate kicks up with a mixture of fear and excitement. “But you find crazy sexy, right? At least in your books?”
“Are you a little stalkerish?” Her tone is raspy and filled with wonder.
“Mildly.” I hold my thumb and forefinger an inch apart. “Just a little.”
Her breathing has quickened, her pupils dilating. “Fuck, why is that hot?”
“’Cause I’m a friendly stalker?” I surmise, with a slow grin. “Kind of like Casper.”
She huffs a laugh. “He was a ghost.”
“That your kink?” I tease. “I’m sure I could figure out how to do that too.”
I’d do anything for her. Be anything for her. Even if, deep down, I hope that I’m enough on my own. Every day, I’m a little more confident that it’s the truth.
Lennox sucks in a breath. “Are you saying you want to make my book fantasies come true?”
Heat coursing through me at the excitement in her tone, I lick at the seam of her lips. “Is that something you’d want?”
“Maybe,” she whispers. Her words are a little hesitant, but the hope in her eyes as she catalogs my reaction is enough of an answer for me.
“Did you bring any toys with you, Princess?” I run a hand up her side, to the curve of her breast. When I reach her nipple, I give it a pinch.
Her eyes fall closed, and her breath goes ragged. “Like what?”
Smiling, I pinch again. “Whatever you have.”
She rubs her thighs together, clearly as excited about the prospect as I am.
With my hands on her shoulders, I spin her around and push her toward her suitcase, smacking her on the ass as she goes. “Come on, Princess. Grab everything you’ve got. Let’s see what we’re working with.”
With a quick peek over her shoulder, she opens her suitcase. Then she pulls out the selection she’s brought with her.
I sidle up beside her and take the toys. When she straightens, I brush a kiss to her lips. “I’ll take these. Can you go grab some ice down the hall?”
Her eyebrows furrow adorably. She’s already worked up, and now she’s frustrated that I’m sending her on an errand instead of getting her naked. “Ice?”
I give her hips a squeeze and nod to the door. “Play along, Princess. I promise you’ll enjoy it.”
Her blue eyes glaze over. “Okay.”Ice bucket in hand, she pads to the door.
“Try not to scream too loud tonight,” I say as she steps out into the hall. “Wouldn’t want the hotel staff to find the Kennedy princess getting fucked like the little whore we both know you are.”
The door clicks shut, cutting off her gasp, and I get to work. Tonight, I’ll give Lennox Kennedy every fantasy she’s ever had. She deserves it and so much more, because that woman is every fantasy of mine come true.