Chapter 22
The large brick home Shiloh brings me to isn’t what I expected. Nor is the tall, willowy blonde who greets us. If I couldn’t feel the cold formality between them, I would be jealous. Instead, I’m confused.
Life has been breathed into this place. From the cluttered front hall to the sports equipment stashed in random corners, it’s clear many children live here.
So what exactly is Shiloh’s role?
Watching him shift his car into drive and carefully steer us back onto the road, I find my mind too full of questions to settle on one.
“Star Crossed,” he explains, “is a group home for foster children who are too close in age to presenting to be placed in traditional foster homes. Most foster parents aren’t equipped to handle a newly presented Alpha or Omega.”
That makes sense. It saddens me to know that teens are refused the love and care of a normal foster home, but it seems that Eloise puts in as much effort to mimic that environment as she can.
“What do you do there?”
Shiloh takes a moment to answer, putting on his turn signal and angling us into a small parking lot beside the local high school. “The other label executives and I mentor the teens who live there.”
My heart melts, turning to goo as I am exposed to this soft side of my coldest Alpha.
“I am going to ask you to wait here,” he tells me, leaning across the console to press his keys into my hand. “Lock the door. I will return in a moment.”
Curious to see what we are doing here, I follow his directions. He’s only gone for five minutes when he returns, smiling at the teenage boy who walks beside him.
I hit the unlock button, letting them slide inside. The overwhelming scent of cinnamon and something woody follows them inside. My nose itches, making me take shallow breaths.
“Bea, this is Spencer. Spence, this is my Omega, Bea.”
We both stare at Shiloh in shock. He called me his Omega. To someone else. Someone he clearly cares about.
Have we entered some alternate universe? Or maybe I’m still asleep and this is a dream?
Subtly, I pinch my thigh. The spike of pain reminds me I am wide awake. What the hell is happening right now?
“I-it’s nice to meet you,” Spencer finally splutters. His hand waves in the air, and his face turns a brilliant shade of red. “Sorry about this.”
My features soften, a small smile tilting my lips. “You don’t have to apologize. You just presented?”
He nods, embarrassed by something that is completely natural.
“Congratulations! Being an Alpha suits you!”
His blush deepens, eyes staring out the window. I give him a break and turn back to Shiloh.
“We are taking Spencer to enroll at the local Alpha Academy. Star Crossed can no longer house him now that his designation has emerged.”
I frown, wondering why our foster system continues to set children up for failure. What does it say about our country that they throw newly presented teens out on their asses, knowing they won’t have anywhere to go?
Not only is that awful, it’s dangerous. What would happen if one of those Alphas stumbled upon an unbonded Omega and lost control of themselves? Or seedy Alphas discovered a newly presented Omega?
I shudder at the thought. Perhaps I should follow in Shiloh’s footsteps and become a mentor. I’d rather my income go to helping others than sit untouched in my bank account.
“Will the Alpha Academy accept him in the middle of the school year?” I ask. When Omen and I enrolled at Dillon Falls Omega Academy, we had to do so before the year started.
“They will.” Peeking over at Shiloh, I bite back a smile. The stern set of his jaw tells me he won’t give them much choice in the matter.
Seeing this side of him makes me conflicted. How do I meld this soft, altruistic man with the self-proclaimed selfish Alpha I am used to?
When we arrive at the Academy, I accompany both men inside. As an Omega, I cannot go all the way onto their campus, but escorting Spencer to the dean’s office is fine.
On the way, I learn about Spencer’s love for music, hearing that Shiloh took over teaching him to play guitar after Spencer’s parents passed. The two of them make quite a pair. My stoic, reserved Alpha and his shy but talkative protégé.
Enrolling Spencer takes a long time. There is a ton of paperwork to fill out and checks for Shiloh to sign, but in the end, he is accepted.
Standing outside, I take several steps away to give them a moment to themselves. It’s clear Spencer is nervous, and I know Shiloh will ease his concerns. He hands him an envelope from inside his jacket before they exchange teary-eyed hugs.
With many promises to visit, we part ways. A security guard leads Spencer further onto the campus toward the dorms, while Shiloh guides me back to the parking lot.
Stopping him by the front of the car, I play with his lapels. “I’m surprised to see this side of you. Thank you for showing me.”
“You deserve to know all of me, Sabine. The good and the ugly.”
“What you are doing for these kids,” I continue, “is wonderful. I think I would enjoy doing the same. If you could point me in the right direction to start.”
His hands wrap over mine, holding me against his chest. “It would be my pleasure to assist you.”
Our moment is interrupted when my stomach growls loudly, sounding like a starving mountain lion.
Shiloh’s lips twitch as he bites back a grin. “Let’s get you fed before you try to eat me.”
“I’m not that hungry,” I grumble as I climb into the car. His laughter is loud enough that I can hear it after the door has closed. As weird and slightly unsettling as it is, I feel like something has awakened inside of Shiloh. Some peace he hadn’t found before.
Does this mean he’s changed his mind? Or is this yet another glimpse into a future he plans to tear away from me?
Settling back into my seat, I silently hope it is the former, because I do not know if I can handle the latter. Not again.
Clinging to the door of Shiloh’s car, I silently curse myself for leaving my brace at home. Putting pressure on my ankle sends pain shooting up my leg. There is no way I will make it inside the restaurant without crying. Or collapsing.
With gritted teeth, I try again to put my full weight on it.
“Sabine?” Shiloh’s voice is sharp as he rounds the front of the car, lips pulled down into the barest hint of a frown. His eyes lock on the way I have my injured foot carefully lifted off the ground. “You’re hurting.”
I jerk a nod, waiting for him to scold me. A yelp escapes my lips, arms flying to wrap around his neck, when he lifts me into his arms.
“We cannot walk into the restaurant like this,” I hiss.
As an Omega, I am not embarrassed in the slightest to be wrapped around one of my Fate-matched mates, but I don’t think Shiloh feels the same. He is always careful not to blur the lines between professionalism and personal life when we are in public.
Shiloh gives me an unimpressed look, shutting the car door with his hip. “Walking hurts you, so I shall carry you.”
“But-”
“I will not hear any arguments on this matter. As your Alpha, it is my responsibility to care for you. If anyone inside has a problem with us, they can look the other way and mind their own damn business.”
Yet again, I am shocked speechless. First, he told Spencer I was his Omega, now he is pronouncing himself as my Alpha? There has to be a catch. No one changes their mind this quickly.
“Two, please.”
His voice rumbles in my ear, bringing my worries to a soft lull instead of a roar. I might not trust him to stick around forever, but for now, he’s here and isn’t pushing me away. Maybe that can be enough.
I slide into my seat, scooting further into the booth when Shiloh follows me. I eye him, wondering why he didn’t choose the seat across from me. If he enjoys sharing this small space, who am I to deny him?
A server comes to take our orders, and I realize I haven’t even looked at their menu. Both are sitting before Shiloh, who hasn’t touched them either.
“Two iced teas, an order of Mandu, and two orders of Japchae. Please.”
“I don’t get to order for myself?” I ask when he turns to look back at me.
“No.”
Narrowing my eyes, I ready for a fight. Is it sweet that he is taking this decision out of my hands when I am too hungry to be decisive? Maybe. Am I going to admit that to him? Absolutely not!
“From your time living in my apartment, we both know you aren’t a picky eater. Your only request is mild to medium spice levels.”
“Still-”
“You are hungry, hurting, and exhausted. Physically and emotionally. Deciding what to eat is a task I can take off your shoulders.” His foot nudges my leg, urging me to lift my sore ankle onto the seat opposite us.
Fates, he’s being way too thoughtful today. How am I supposed to stay angry with him when it’s like I’m interacting with an entirely different person?
One who still calls me Sabine, like the asshole he is. The way my full name sounds falling from his lips is growing on me.
“My high school friend group presented around the same time. All Alphas. We enrolled at the same Academy, and ended up rooming together, too.” A brittle smile stretches across his lips. “We were close enough that we felt like a pack. Fate was playing in our favor, right?”
Absentmindedly, he grabs my hand. The touch of his skin against mine is faint as he traces every line and groove on my palm.
“After we graduated, we all fell into our careers. I was a manager-in-training back then. Living on the road with bands and partying until the sun rose. Then they met her . Their Omega. They shared a scent match Fated connection, so they recognized Cedes as soon as they ran into each other at a local art show.”
My stomach twists, unsettled by the thought of him being in another pack.
I force myself to bite back any noise of complaint, too afraid my discomfort would stop him from telling me more.
His openness is a gift I want to treasure.
I doubt anyone else would get to see the raw, tormented expressions crossing his face.
“You can imagine my excitement when they called to tell me. The men I considered my pack had found our mate. I didn’t return home for two days because the band I was helping manage was finishing its spring tour.
When I walked through the door of our apartment, her scent smacked me in the face. But there was no soul-deep, gut punch like the others had described. I didn’t feel like my life had been turned upside down, and neither did she.”
My fingers flex, stilling his drawing. I twist my hand to intertwine with his, offering silent support and comfort. I’m afraid to hear what comes next. It’s obvious their split was far from amicable.
“Cedes was a very sweet Omega. She liked my scent enough that she wanted to keep me around. I was relieved not to have to leave the pack, and promised to do everything in my power to make her happy.”
He swallows thickly when our server arrives with our food, letting my hand go to push my plate toward me. Dark, rich brown eyes focus on me, watching until I take a bite. Only then does he continue his story.
“For years, we were fine. Happy. Then life happened. Financial struggles stemming from one of my packmates losing his job, and another making some bad investments. An executive role opened at the label, and I took it. Steady hours, less travel, and a significant increase in pay.”
Shiloh takes a bite, moving his noodles around on his plate as he chews. My heart is breaking for my Alpha. I don’t know what they did to hurt him like this, but I hope they faced the karma they deserved for it.
“One day, I came home from work to find her bent over the arm of the couch, being rutted into by one of her mates. I snapped. Hurt both of them. If the others hadn’t stepped in and knocked me out, who knows how far I would have gone to keep them away from her.”
Shiloh drops his chopsticks and turns to look at me, his expression grave.
“When I woke up, she asked me to leave. Kicked me from the pack. One moment of jealousy was all it took for things to fall apart. That’s why I have been so reluctant to explore the connection between us, Sabine.
If I were to hurt you the way I did her… I could never forgive myself.”
Shoving a dumpling into my mouth, I take my time chewing. My initial reaction is to say fuck them all, but that is not the response Shiloh needs to hear.
I take a sip of my tea before twisting in the seat to face him. “Let me get this straight. You were in a relationship with this Omega for years and never bonded her? Then you took on a high-stress career change, had an Alpha meltdown, and her response was to immediately remove you from the pack?”
When he nods, I let an aggressive huff fall from my lips.
“Fuck that bitch! I’m sorry, Shiloh, but there is no way she didn’t have a hand in instigating what happened.
No Omega leads an Alpha on for that long, refusing to allow them to bond, and then suddenly changes their mind.
She knew she didn’t want you in the pack and made sure she had a reason for you not to be. ”
His brows furrow, mouth opening and closing several times. “I… you truly think so?”
Nodding rapidly, I press my hand to his chest, above his heart.
“Yes. If we meet a compatible mate, Fate-matched or chosen, an instinctual drive revs to life in our bodies. During moments of sexual intimacy, our thoughts narrow to solidifying that bond. She led you on. For what reason, I’m not sure, but she did. ”
His hand lands on mine, squeezing tightly. “I never considered things from that perspective.”
“You were heartbroken and packless. It’s normal to miss the red flags when there aren’t any green ones in sight.”
Leaning closer, I stare into his dark eyes, hoping he sees the depth of meaning behind my next words.
“I’m not her, Shiloh. Our connection isn’t the same, nor are my intentions.
Honestly, I don’t believe your reactions would be the same if you saw me with one of my other mates.
Because, unlike those assholes, we’re your pack. You are ours, Alpha.”
He sucks in a sharp breath, but I can see his walls falling back into place, so I press a messy kiss to his cheek and turn back to my food.
“Eat, Alpha, before you’re the hangry one.”
My words aren’t empty, but they lack conviction, because Shiloh has proven to me time and again that my words aren’t enough to break through his walls. Undoing the damage another Omega caused won’t be easy, but I know our future together is worth the effort.
And this Cedes girl had better hope I never see her in public. I might let my instincts take control and scratch her damn eyes out.