Chapter 40
MATTEO
Goldie dozed off at around eleven PM, lying across two seats in the waiting area, arms and legs and even hands balled up as though she’s waiting for a fight. She might just be getting it. Just not the kind you can win with fist and kicks.
Watching her struggle with what happened to her sister, and sitting in the hospital waiting room, has brought up so many memories of doing the same that I had trouble sitting still.
But I did. For her. Because every time I stood up and started pacing, she looked at me like she was afraid I’d walk right on out of the hospital and leave her there.
I hope she doesn’t wake up while I’m gone now, but I need some fresh air and I need to call Ferro, see where everything stands.
The front of the hospital, by the entrance to the ER, is a chaos of ambulances, injured people being brought in by family members and nurses and doctors running this way and that.
But the back is almost serene. A field of grass, short in anticipation of winter, stretches all the way to the highway, which is just far enough that all the cars traveling on it create a gentle humming melody that’s not too loud.
It’s early, but the moon is out already, accompanied by a couple of twinkling stars.
It’s easy to forget where I am back here.
The hospital where my brother died was near the beach.
You could hear the waves crashing late at night, when even the ambulance traffic sometimes died down.
And you could see stars there too. And the moon.
I think I prayed on some of those nights when I went outside, needing some air.
It was also around that time that I stopped praying altogether.
God’s never been on my side. All I have is this curse of Ruin hanging over me and it swallows up everything and everyone I love.
Ferro’s voice is breathless and slightly panicked as he answers my call. “What’s going on? Did she turn for the worst?”
For a split second I think he’s talking about Goldie and a jolt of panic stabs my chest, hot as lightning.
Then I realize he’s talking about Chiara, his wife, and I get the distinct feeling that he’s been in a situation like this before.
Waiting for news by the phone. News about whether someone survived or not.
“She’s the same,” I tell him. “But the doctors think that’s a good sign. She was lucky, the bullet didn’t hit any major organs, and they think they managed to sew everything up just fine.”
The doctor told us all that once we were back in the waiting room. I had to repeat it twice for Gianna because she didn’t trust her ears when she heard it herself. I can relate to that too.
“What’s happening with her father and the rest of her family?” I ask.
“Codelli was shot too, but it was minor. His daughter took the brunt of it, and I’ll never forgive myself for that. Do you think she will? Forgive me, I mean.”
It’s late, but not that late. I wonder how much Ferro has had to drink.
“I think she knows you didn’t mean to shoot her,” I say. “As for the rest… I hope they’ll be able to forgive us one day.”
I hear the clink of a bottle against crystal and then him swallowing whatever drink he poured for himself. Whisky, most likely. That seems to be his drink of choice. And I could go for one myself.
“I was five years old when my little sister died,” he says.
“And then two years later, my mom tried to take her life. She was in the hospital for a week before she died and no one told me anything. The next time I saw her was at her funeral. I thought she was just asleep in the coffin, I tried to wake her. And my father lost it after that, drove everything into the ground in his grief. Did I ever tell you that?”
“No,” I say and I’m not sure I want to hear it now. But it sounds like he needs to get it off his chest.
“It’s why I’m doing what I’m doing. To get everything back. My sister was killed in a freak sledding accident. She was ten, and an older boy, Dominic, one of the Leones, was responsible. But he was never responsible, if you know what I mean. I’m gonna make them all pay.”
“I’m sorry for your loss,” I say. “I know what that’s like, getting no justice for the wrongs done to you.”
I don’t quite see how an accident, even one as terrible as the one he described, could make a man want to murder as many people as he has on his rise to the top.
“They, the Leones, ruined my father when he tried to get justice,” Ferro goes on. “In the end, they put him in the river to stop him. It’s been just me and Lorenzo ever since.”
“Isn’t Francesco a Leone?” I ask.
“Yeah, he’s doing everything he needs to, so I don’t wipe out the rest of his family, what little of it is left,” he says and takes another long swallow of his drink. “He’s very eager. Did you see how quickly he produced the chief of police to sort out our problem at the hospital?”
“That was nothing short of a miracle,” I say. “I already saw myself in handcuffs and then the guy arrived and made it all go away.”
“You shouldn’t have stayed there in the first place,” he says curtly. “That was dumb.”
“Maybe,” I say and run my hand thought my hair. “But I want Gianna to forgive me too.”
“More than you want your crown in LA back?” I can hear the grin in his voice.
“I want both.”
He chuckles and I’m glad he’s laughing again.
“You’ll get it. Won’t be long now. Codelli is willing to do what it takes to get his girls back. He’s been calling me non-stop, wanting to surrender.”
“Don’t kill him.” The words are out of my mouth before I can stop them. “I don’t think Chiara or Gianna will ever forgive you for killing him now.”
He chuckles again. “Funny enough, I figured that out on my own. But I don’t see a way to let him live and stay safe.”
“Exile?”
He doesn’t say anything right away, just breathes into the phone for a full minute, maybe longer.
“That could be a solution,” he finally says. “Maybe you could take him to LA with you. Him and whatever army he still has.”
That’s the best idea I’ve heard in a while. But I don’t want to get too excited. Ferro’s been known to change his mind often.
“I like it,” I say. “You think about it, and I’ll go back to Gianna.”
“Call me if there’s any news.”
I promise him I will and end the call. The highway sounds a lot like the crashing of waves now.
The Pacific Ocean waves. Maybe it means I’m close to going back there and putting everything right back home.
And saving Goldie’s family in the process.
Even though they did fuck all to help mine when we needed them.
But maybe it’s time I put all that behind me and start forgiving too.