16. Crew
Chapter 16
Crew
I wake up drenched in sweat, my pillow soaked with tears.
I dreamt of her again, like I have every night since we were told she was gone. In my dreams, she’s angry—at me, at her parents, and the world for failing her.
We failed her, and now she’s gone.
Seven hundred and forty-nine days have passed, but it still feels like yesterday. That ache in my chest? It doesn’t fade. Every time I wake up, I feel it… the hollow emptiness that is now my reality in a world without Scarlett.
The pain becomes too much, just like it always does when I wake up and think of her. The brief moment where she is still alive until it all comes crashing down on me again, that she really is gone. My chest aches in that familiar way that makes me want to hide from it all under the haze of smoke that numbs my brain from thinking about her, but Roman will kill me if he finds me high again.
Especially today.
Roman’s voice cuts through the fog. “Get up. We have work to do.”
I glance at him, the way he’s leaning against my doorframe, watching me to see if I’m high again. I’m not… well, not yet.
I can barely move, but I do. I drag myself out of bed, feeling like my bones are made of lead. I consider crawling back into bed, hiding from the world, from everything, but Roman won’t let me.
Roman’s dad is already in the kitchen, looking like he’s been up for hours. “What are you boys doing today?”
“Heading to Elijah’s,” Roman mutters, barely sparing him a glance as he grabs the snake’s food from the fridge.
“Tell him to swing by when you can. We need to talk about business.”
“What business?” Roman asks, his interest piqued.
“The new club he’s opening. You don’t need to know any more than that.” His dad’s tone is casual, but there’s an edge of seriousness in it. There’s something in his eyes today that I can’t quite place as he looks at us, and I tense, worried he knows I’ve dipped into the product again .
I excuse myself to the bathroom to splash cold water on my face, needing the sting to wake me up, or maybe it’s to sober me up before I fuck up all of Roman’s plans.
I’ve been spiraling since Elijah told us she was gone, and it seems like the fate I was always too intent on avoiding has finally come true, as I feel my hands shake with the need to take more. Always more, always another final hit of something to numb the pain with the promise that I’ll stop tomorrow, but I’m just not strong enough.
When I walk back into the room, Roman’s already got the keys in hand. The car’s parked outside, engine running.
“You good?” Roman asks, an edge to his tone that tells me he’s not in the mood for my shit today.
I nod, even though I’m anything but. But I can’t show any weakness today. We’ve got a deal to close, and we can’t afford mistakes. It’s just the two of us. Elijah’s out, spending his Thursday with his wife. I don’t know who she is, and I don’t care. All I know is that he’s been pulling back more lately, not telling us where he is as he builds his empire away from his dad’s legacy, even though Roman’s dad owns his ass as much as ours.
Me? I’m in debt to him more than any of us. He took me in when I had no one when my parents died from a drug overdose from the wrong batch, and he’s looked after me ever since. When he caught me stealing some of the product, he didn’t deal with me like he should have. He excused it on the account that I would work for him and sell it for him in the colleges where he put me as a student.
So I owe him everything.
The drive to the warehouse is quiet, but my mind is a mess. My chest feels tight, my breath shallow. The past never lets me go, and the ache to take the drugs and feel numb is nearly too much. I keep seeing her in my mind—her face, her voice before she stopped talking to us, her anger as we tormented her because we were told to. It’s like she’s haunting me, and I don’t want to stop it.
If this is my eternal torture for driving her to the bottom of the ocean, then I’ll welcome it. I deserve it.
When we reach the warehouse, the air shifts. The place is always grim, but today, it feels suffocating. It is all steel and shadows, the kind of place where only bad deals are made and where we make people disappear.
Roman leads the way, his pace steady and purposeful. I stay close, lagging for a moment, staring at the crates stacked high in the corner.
Weapons, deals, power.
Everything we’re tangled in. It’s all I’ve known for years now, as Roman tries to build something away from his dad to try to take him down.
“Stop looking like you’re about to crack,” Roman’s voice cuts through my haze, his words like ice, just like it has been since she left. “We’re here to do business, Crew, and I don’t need someone who doesn’t care about anything but drugs at my back. You’re my brother, so fucking act like it.”
I force myself to snap out of it, knowing he’s right. I can’t fall apart, not now, even as every fiber of my being is begging me to smoke the drugs to numb the feelings I can feel creeping up.
Was she in pain?
Was her last thoughts of us? Even I know how selfish that sounds, but I was always a selfish man when it came to Scarlett Reyes. I wanted her undivided attention on me always and I would have done about anything to get it.
I thought as I got older, as the years passed without her, that my grief would lessen, and I would move on and leave her behind me, but I still feel like the eighteen-year-old boy who lost her. I remember how painful the night was after I locked myself away in my room after shutting down in front of my friends. How tired I became after I sat on the floor, my back against the wall, only able to think of how it happened. How I almost ran out of breath as I cried, and how I held my hand over my mouth so no one would hear the animalistic noises I was making, because the pain of finding out Scarlett was gone was nothing I had ever felt before.
“Crew!” Roman snaps his fingers in my face, jolting me back to reality, and I push it all back down where it belongs—my guilt, my anger, all of it, and step forward.
“Thank you for meeting us,” Roman greets the men we’re meeting as we sit down in his office space. I sit to his left, eyeing them both warily.
The big one nods his head but doesn’t say much more, and the one who I’m assuming is in charge fixes the cuffs of his shirt. “You want me to stop doing business with your father to do business with you instead? Do I understand that correctly?”
“Yes, Sir,” Roman nods his head, “I think it will benefit us both incredibly.”
“While you stick it to your father, I’m assuming?” The man laughs, his eyebrow raised. “I wasn’t born yesterday, Roman, and I find it a cliché in our business since not many of us have a loving relationship with the man who fathered us…” he reaches for the water on the desk, taking a sip. “It’s how I got here, after all. Now, I won’t dismiss you because of your age because I see the glint in your eye that tells me you mean business. So you get ten minutes to convince me, and if I’m not impressed, I walk.”
The room seems to thicken with tension as the two men before us seem to narrow their eyes, judging our every move. They are the kind of men who you don’t turn your back on because they will no sooner stab you in the back to get ahead than be in business with you.
Loyalty is everything in our world… unless you are promised more power. A better deal, an extra benefit, knowing that they will soon be more powerful than the man you’ve been in business with for the past thirty years? They all jump to the side they think will make them richer… more powerful.
Roman wastes no time in telling them what we can offer them if they cease business with his father. “I can give you a deal that guarantees the product is cheaper and the same, if not better, quality. My father has been slipping, fixating on something that isn’t business, and it’s affecting everything. He’s a sinking ship, and I suggest that you jump while you still have the chance.”
“Are you stealing his product?” he inquires.
Roman shakes his head. “I wouldn’t dream of trying to become my own man while profiting off of the theft of others, even if he does deserve it. No, I have sought out and verified my manufacturing, and quite frankly, I’m insulted you would ask.”
“My apologies, but I would have been stupid not to ask. You wouldn’t believe the number of boys who try to undermine their parents by stealing the product that has provided their lifestyles for their entire lives.”
“Too shady for my liking, Mr. Pacheco. Would you like to view the product before we discuss this any further?” Roman stands, not giving Mr. Pacheco any time to respond, and holds his arm out towards the door.
Mr. Pacheco eyes us both as if weighing his options. His gaze flickers briefly to the large man beside him, who gives a slight nod. Pacheco finally stands, straightens his cuffs again, and signals for Roman to walk ahead. “Lead the way.”
I follow them, my mind still stuck in the past as memories of Scarlett threaten to take over. The air in Roman’s office felt almost suffocating, or is it the withdrawals from the drugs I now rely on just to get through the day?
Roman’s play isn’t just about undercutting his father; it’s about pushing his dad out before he goes into the skin trade and pulling us all in there with him. If he succeeds, it could change everything.
We walk down the corridor, each step echoing as we follow each other. The space around us may be steel and shadows, but it’s organized—the kind of environment made to intimidate the lesser man. Everything is curated to do just that as we try to gain more power… more influence, and a fight to be taken seriously before this game between Roman’s father and us turns deadly.
No one here is concerned with warmth or light. It’s all about control, and Roman thrives on control.
Roman stops in front of the doors that lead to the storage area where the product is kept. The door slides open, and the cold air from inside spills out, carrying the faint smell of metal and chemicals.
“Here,” Roman gestures toward a row of crates. “This is the first batch. It’s yours to inspect.”
Pacheco doesn’t hesitate. Stepping forward, he examines the product with a practiced critical eye. He picks up one of the guns, an SA80, and holds it out in front of him towards the large man standing beside him. “Check it.”
The large man shifts slightly, reaching for the weapon, and dismantles and reassembles the piece with a precision that even impresses me. Roman doesn’t flinch, keeping perfect control always. His expression is eerily calm, even as Pacheco inspects every detail of the shipment.
After what feels like an eternity, Pacheco stands back, folding his arms across his chest. “I’ve seen enough. Quality is as you promised. Lower price, too?”
Roman nods. “It’s competitive, but that’s only a part of it. What I’m offering you is more than just product. It’s reliability, guaranteed delivery times, and no games. My father’s business is crumbling, and he is far too preoccupied with his personal business. I won’t let it happen on my watch. You get me. I know how you undercut your father a few years ago. You are a ruthless man, Mr. Pacheco, and I respect it. I’ll make sure your orders are handled with precision, but I do want to ask you for something.”
Pacheco raises an eyebrow, waiting for Roman to continue.
“I want loyalty, and when the time comes that I’m finally ready to take down my father, I want you to back me.”
“Back you against the other families? That’s a big ask. More than some loyalty over product.”
Roman crosses his arms over his chest, his fingers flexing. The only sign that he’s annoyed by having to explain himself. “I know how much of an ask it is, Pacheco, but it’s a necessary ask. My father is losing his mind by the day, and you don’t want to be on the losing side when he finally snaps.”
Pacheco pauses, studying Roman for a long moment. “You really think you can deliver what I’m asking for?”
Roman nods.
“I want an extra shipment. Half off.”
“Done.” Roman states.
“You’re not just playing at being a businessman, are you?” Pacheco shakes his hand, but Roman refuses to let go.
He leans in slightly, his voice steady and confident. “I’m not playing. I’m offering you a deal you won’t find elsewhere, with the bonus of a lifeline I’m not offering anyone else. Give me your loyalty, and when I’m done with my father, I’ll offer you something that will take you further than you’ve ever gone with him. We can be partners, or we can go our separate ways, but don’t insult me further by continuing to question me.”
There’s a long pause. Pacheco turns to look at the large man beside him, and they exchange a glance. I hold my breath, hoping Roman’s words have landed, praying this gamble, because that’s all this is, will pay off.
Finally, Pacheco looks back at Roman, his lips curling up. “You have guts, and I can respect someone who has the balls to speak to me like that. Alright, Roman, you’ve got yourself a deal… on one condition.”
Roman nods, not showing any signs of hesitation. “Name it.”
Pacheco’s smile widens. “You keep your word—no more games. You make good on what you’re offering, and I’ll have your back. Complete loyalty.”
“Understood.”
Pacheco leaves with the contract in hand, wanting his lawyer to look over it and a promise to be in touch.
I finally feel like I can breathe, like I’ve been holding it this entire meeting. Roman slumps in his seat behind his desk, running his hand through his hair and making it stick up in all directions.
“So that went well…”