Chapter Twenty-Three
RILEY
It’s going to take an actual miracle for me to pull off another secret OBGYN appointment without Kieran finding out, but it’s too late to back out now.
Even if I do manage to sneak away from the bistro without my protection team realizing, that’s only the first hurdle I will face today.
The other is that my baby may no longer have a heartbeat.
Even just thinking it has my eyes stinging with tears.
“Get it together,” I mutter as I quickly run my fingers through my hair. “Go to your happy place, Riley.”
I’m not even sure what my happy place is anymore. The world around me is nothing but a dumpster fire, and some days, it’s hard to find the positives among the wreckage.
As I head down the stairs, I find Ciara waiting for me at the bottom.
She’s leaning against the banister with one hand curved protectively over the swell of her belly and the other holding a mug of tea.
I arch a brow. “You’re supposed to be in bed.”
She waves me off. “I needed to stretch my legs. Besides, I’m hoping a little movement will convince these stubborn children to finally make their grand entrance.”
I laugh softly, but before I can reply, Elena appears from the kitchen, carrying a neatly folded pile of freshly washed baby clothes.
Ciara sighs, rolling her eyes. “Don’t bother with the lecture. I’m heading back to bed.”
Elena gives Ciara a pointed look. “Don’t make me call your husband.”
I smile. “If you’re carrying twins, does that mean it’s three against two?”
“Depends what team you’re on.” Elena flashes me a wink.
“Be careful how you answer that, Riley,” Ciara warns.
I hold my hands up. “Uh, you know what, I think I’m Switzerland here. I’m on neither team.”
Ciara narrows her eyes at me. “Traitor.”
Elena chuckles as she heads up the stairs, though she makes sure to give my shoulder a squeeze as she passes me.
Ciara takes a sip of tea. “I swear, that woman has a sixth sense. She doesn’t need to say a word, and she makes me feel guilty for putting my feet on the floor.”
“Maybe that’s a good thing. You should be resting.”
“And maybe I’m tired of everyone telling me to rest. I know Ronan and Elena mean well, but it’s like they’ve forgotten I’m still a person. I don’t just stop existing because I’m pregnant.”
There’s a heaviness beneath her words that I recognize, the same helpless frustration I’ve been wrestling with these past few days.
“I get it. It’s hard, feeling like you’re stuck in limbo.”
She nods, her hand absently stroking the side of her bump. “Exactly. It gives you too much time to think… Anyway, it’s a big day today, huh?”
“Yeah. Big day.”
She reaches for my hand and gives it a gentle squeeze. “Remember, whatever happens today, you’re not alone. You can even call me during the appointment and have me on speaker phone if you need me.”
The words hit deeper than I expect.
It’s such a simple gesture, but it’s enough to steady some of the nervous butterflies that are swirling around in my stomach.
“Thanks, Ciara. I’ll text you as soon as it’s done.”
“You better.” She offers me a small smile.
I walk toward the front door.
“Oh, and, Riley?”
I pause with my hand on the doorknob and glance over my shoulder.
“Yeah?”
“Try to breathe.”
“That’s easier said than done.”
“It always is.” She offers me a last smile before making her slow climb back up the stairs.
When I step outside, Jace, Leo, and Wesley are all waiting by the car.
They nod when they see me, offering polite smiles, but nothing more. After all, they’re not my friends, they’re my watchdogs, a walking reminder that danger is never far away.
Jace opens the car door for me. “Ready to go?”
I slide into the back seat. “As ready as I’ll ever be.”
This may be the stupidest thing I’ve ever done, and I’ve done some pretty stupid things in my life.
But if I don’t go through with this, I’ll be stuck in limbo forever, wondering whether this baby even has a chance.
And if the worst happens and there is no longer a heartbeat, I need to know before I go and turn Kieran’s world upside down.
The bell above the bistro door chimes softly as I step inside, my heart already racing to the point of pain.
Oscar is already here, sitting in a booth near the window. He’s dressed up for the occasion, wearing a pale blue shirt and slacks, and his auburn hair looks freshly cut and styled.
He waves when he spots me, his expression softening into a smile that I haven’t seen in years.
I’m used to his smug grins or smirks that are meant to provoke me. The genuine warmth in his eyes takes me so much by surprise that I stand frozen for a moment, staring at my brother as if seeing him for the first time.
“Earth to Riley?” He laughs, waving a hand, and I blink out of my trance.
“Sorry, I was miles away.” I slide into the seat across from him.
“I’m surprised you showed up alone.”
“Oh, trust me, I’m far from alone.” I point out the window to where the blacked-out SUV is parked out front.
“What am I looking at?”
“My protection team,” I say just as Jace locks eyes with me, and I offer him a small wave, which he doesn’t return.
“You’re joking.”
“Not even a little.”
“Well, I’ll be honest, I’d rather them than Kieran. I was wondering how long it would take for lunch to turn into an interrogation.”
I level him with a look before picking up my menu to scan the options, even though I’m not even the slightest bit hungry.
“Kieran is willing to give you a chance, Oscar. And I would appreciate it if you would at least try to do the same.”
He holds up his hands. “I am trying. It’s just…he doesn’t exactly make it easy. Of all of the Sullivan men, you had to marry him? He’s like the fucking Grinch on steroids.”
“Don’t be dramatic.”
“I’m not, that’s the point.”
I sigh as I set down my menu, already exhausted from this verbal tennis match.
“If this is going to work, you’re going to have to meet us both halfway. That means no more passive-aggressive jabs or snide comments about my husband. Deal?”
Oscar winces as guilt flickers in his eyes. “No more digs at Kieran, I promise.”
“Thank you.”
I fiddle nervously with my hands, unsure of what to say, and from the looks of it, Oscar feels the same way.
He quickly waves down a waitress to order a pot of coffee and a ginger tea for me, but soon enough silence settles once more between us.
“So…how’s married life?” he eventually asks.
“You don’t need to pretend to care. I appreciate you’re not the biggest fan of the Sullivans.”
“No, but like I said, I’m trying. So, tell me what’s going on with you.”
“You really want to know?”
“I do.”
“Okay. Well, it’s pretty interesting living at Ronan’s, considering Ciara is about to give birth to twins any day now.”
“You’re not living in the city?”
“No, Kieran moved us out to Washington Heights because the security at Ronan’s estate is so much stronger.”
“Good…that’s good.” He stares down at his clasped hands. “So, Ciara is having twins?”
“A boy and a girl.”
“That’s…”
“A lot?” I chuckle as Oscar noticeably shudders.
“Just the thought of one baby has me breaking out in hives.”
I try not to wince at his words.
“I don’t know how Mom managed to have three of them. Though, I think if Alice was born first, she would have stopped after one. I swear, she never stopped crying for the first four years of her life.”
The mention of our sister has my stomach sinking.
I know I should talk about her more to keep her memory alive, but sometimes it’s just too painful to think of how life could have been if she were alive.
Thankfully, the waitress arrives with our drinks, and I eagerly reach for my tea just to have something to do with my hands.
I take a sip. “Have you finally thrown out Mom’s old porcelain cat collection? Now that both Mom and Dad are gone, we can finally get rid of it.”
To my surprise, Oscar throws his head back and laughs.
“I completely forgot about the porcelain cats.”
“Seriously? Those things haunted my nightmares from the ages of five through ten. They were hideous. Considering how expensive they were, they looked like I could have made them in kindergarten class.”
“And yet, Mom loved them.”
“And Dad loved Mom.”
Oscar smiles. “He sure did.”
“I mean, don’t get me wrong, I loved her too, but not enough to keep those ugly things.”
“Too late. I’m going to have them boxed up and shipped to your place. Consider it a belated wedding gift.”
“You wouldn’t dare.”
“Wouldn’t I?” Oscar challenges, but the twinkle of amusement in his eyes gives him away.
It’s enough to ease the tension, and soon enough we’re genuinely laughing as we share old stories of our parents from our childhood.
I sip my tea. “I hate to say it, but I’ve missed this, being able to just reminisce about stuff.”
“Yeah, me too. Things felt a lot simpler back then.”
“Back when all we had to worry about was whether Dad would catch us sneaking out?”
Oscar chuckles. “Exactly. And even then, half the time he’d just ground you and give me a high five.”
“Because you were the favorite.” I roll my eyes.
“Obviously.” Oscar’s smile is boyish, and for a moment, it’s like we’re teenagers again.
It’s familiar and comforting, and it almost makes me forget why I’m here.
Almost.
My phone buzzes on the table as the appointment reminder flashes on the screen, and my heart gives a sharp, painful thud.
It’s almost time.
“Oscar… I need a favor.”
My brother’s eyes narrow with suspicion. “What kind of favor?”
“The kind you’re not going to like.” I set down my cup of tea. “I need to go somewhere, and I need you to cover for me if Kieran’s men ask where I am.”
Oscar’s entire demeanor changes in an instant. His back straightens, and the amusement vanishes from his eyes.
“Why?”
“It’s a long story. I don’t really have time to explain.” I glance out of the window.
Leo is leaning against the hood of the car, surveying the street, while Wesley takes the rear. But they are the least of my problems when Jace is the one standing right outside the door to the bistro.
“Are you in trouble?”
“Oh my god, no, nothing like that!” The word bursts out of me louder than I intend it to, drawing a few curious glances from nearby tables. “No. I’m not in trouble. It’s just… complicated.”
“Then uncomplicate it. I’m not lying for you unless you tell me what’s going on.”
I stare out of the window as my pulse pounds in my ears.
I hadn’t planned on telling Oscar the truth of my situation, but it looks like if I don’t, there’s no way he’ll agree to help me, and I need his help.
“I’m pregnant.”
Oscar blinks, but then his expression hardens, and my last thread of hope starts to slip through my fingers.
“Pregnant? As in…you and Kieran are having a baby?”
“Yes.”
“Does he… Does he know?”
My throat tightens as I slowly shake my head.
Oscar runs a hand over his face. “Jesus Christ, Riley. Why the hell are you keeping that from him?”
“It’s not—” I stop, dragging in a shaky breath. “It’s not because I think he’ll be angry. I just don’t think he’s ready for this. And if he’s not, I don’t want him to feel trapped.”
Oscar leans forward, resting his elbows on the table. “Is any guy ever really ready? It’s a baby. It’s terrifying for everyone.”
“I know. But I don’t want to force him into something he’s not prepared for.”
Oscar shakes his head. “No. You don’t get to protect him from this. He made this baby just as much as you did, and he deserves to take some responsibility.”
“I know how babies are made.”
“And yet, you didn’t think to protect yourself.”
“I’m not fighting with you about this. What’s done is done.”
“So, what’s your plan, then, Riles? Because at some point you’re going to show. Are you hoping Kieran is too stupid to notice when you pop out the kid?”
“I told you not to shit talk my husband.”
“Yeah, well, that was before I found out he’s going to be the father of the heir to our family, so forgive me for wanting to make sure this baby makes it to the final trimester.”
I glance at the time on my phone. “Can we save the familial politics for a later date? I’m going to miss my appointment if I don’t leave now.”
“All I’m saying is that Kieran deserves to know he’s going to be a father, and you owe it to him to give him the chance to step up.”
Oscar’s right, I know he’s right. But the thought of telling Kieran before I know whether this pregnancy is even viable feels too much like a bad omen.
“I’ll tell him. I swear I will. Just…not yet. Not until I have this scan and I know for sure that everything is okay.”
Oscar exhales slowly, leaning back in his seat. “Fine. I’ll cover for you. But make it quick, yeah?”
Relief floods through me, and I lean forward to press a quick kiss to my brother’s cheek.
“Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me. If Kieran finds out, he’s going to kill me. So, go, before I change my mind.”
I excuse myself under the pretense of needing the bathroom. The moment I get to my feet, Jace catches my eye.
“Bathroom,” I mouth at him, and he nods.
I wade through the busy tables, and once I’m out of Jace’s line of sight, I sneak along the service corridor and push open the heavy fire door that leads into the narrow alley behind the café.
The cool air hits my cheeks as I press my back against the brick wall, every nerve in my body on high alert as I try not to imagine Kieran’s fury if he finds out that I purposefully disobeyed him.
From where I’m hiding in the shadows of the alley, I can see the SUV parked by the curb and Leo and Wesley gathered near it, scanning the area like hawks.
Right on cue, Oscar steps out of the café and strolls toward them, waving his hands animatedly as he starts talking as a way to keep them distracted.
This is my chance.
I slip out of the alley, sticking close to the building as I edge along the side toward the OBGYN clinic next door. I keep my gaze fixed on the ground, willing myself to stay invisible.
But then I catch movement out of the corner of my eye. Instinct makes me glance up, and for a split second, I almost lock eyes with Jace.
He’s standing slightly apart from the others, scanning the street with that predator’s stillness that all of Kieran’s men seem to have. His head begins to turn, his eyes sweeping dangerously close to where I’m standing.
I freeze, trying my hardest not to even breathe.
Please look away.
Oscar must notice as he quickly says something that draws Jace’s attention back to him.
I don’t wait to feel any relief. I dart out of the shadows, making sure to keep my head down as I take the stairs leading up to the clinic two at a time.
My fingers tremble violently as I tug the door open and slip inside, praying that I’ll be back sipping tea with Oscar before anyone realizes I’m gone.