7. Lev
Chapter 7
Lev
I hate this shitty club. Everything about the place is gaudy. Mirror surfaces, slick lights flashing over the dance floor, an enormous DJ booth in the shape of a heart. Even the bar serves overpriced, absurd drinks. Who the hell wants a twenty-dollar sugary martini?
I sip my whiskey and wait. I let the noise pound down around me. Bitterness floods my throat.
How the fuck did this happen?
I close my eyes. My fencer’s moans fill my head. Her lithe, toned, athletic body stretches on my bed, and she looks at me with a heady mix of lust and impatience. Her little toy pressed to her pussy, making her moan. My cock between her legs, shattering her to pieces. Sweat on her breasts, my tongue licking it up.
I’ve been obsessed with that girl since that night happened, and I kept telling myself I’d never see her again.
One final mistake before I got married and pledged myself to an Italian girl I’d never even met.
What was supposed to be a fling turned into a nightmare.
Because she’s been everything. She’s been everywhere. Each night, I go to sleep and she’s in my dreams. Each morning, I wake up and she’s the first thing I think about. My little fencer curled against my chest.
I haven’t felt like that in a very, very long time.
And I fucking hate it.
I hate her for dragging it out of me.
And I want her so badly it makes me sick.
Seeing her standing there in my father’s sitting room was like witnessing an atom bomb rip apart everything I’ve ever known and loved. It took all my years of keeping my charming mask in place not to flip my shit.
How is it her ? That fucking girl?
I’m obsessed with her. I want her so fucking bad it makes me physically ill. And I despise her for making me feel this way.
“I assume you’re not here because you like the ambiance.” Adriano Marino sits down on the stool beside me. He studies me for a moment, not unfriendly. I remember the night he held a gun to my head and nearly killed me. He would’ve done it too, if it weren’t for Alex saving my life.
Now we’re cool. Water under the bridge.
Though I won’t forget.
“I’m here to make sure our deal still stands.” I pour more whiskey into my mouth to keep myself from begging him to tell me everything he knows about my future wife. I crave her so desperately, it’s pathetic.
“Nothing’s changed,” he says casually, checking his phone. He knocks out a text before putting it back. “How’s it going on your end?”
“I’ve been putting out feelers. There are a few men who will back me when the time comes.”
“Only a few?”
“I have to be careful. I only get one shot and nothing more.”
Adriano nods slowly. “It’s not an easy thing, deposing your own father. You know you’ll have to kill him, right?”
“I understand what it’ll take.”
“And when Italians help make it happen? Your pakhan isn’t going to object?”
“I’ll handle Zeitsev. Don’t worry about him.”
“I’m worried about everything, Lev. It’s what makes me who I am.” Adriano’s smile is distant and tense. I don’t know the heir to the Marino Famiglia all that well, but so far he’s been consistent and reliable.
When we set up this marriage arrangement, there were two layers. The first is the public deal: our families become intertwined, the war between the Russians and the Italians ends forever, and we work together to import a new flow of drug product through a Canadian pipeline the Zeitsev Bratva’s been building.
The second is private between me, Adriano, and Alex. I agreed to marry the girl—to marry Carmie —without a fight, to put our past violence and problems behind us, only if he agreed to help me take down my father.
This isn’t what I wanted, but it’s past time. My father’s been a problem for years, and when my older brother, Stepan, was alive, it was easy to ignore it. Step had a way about him—he could manage my father’s rages and his stupid decisions without causing any problems.
But without him, things have gotten worse. Father’s been more aggressive and more violent. He holds a grudge against Alex and my sister, Natalya, and one day he’s going to do something about them. Something very stupid and very ill-advised.
And so I made a choice.
I know how the world will see me when it’s done.
I’ll be a monster.
There’s nothing more dishonorable than fratricide in our world.
“Just back me when the time comes.” I finish my drink and push it away. “I met Carmie, by the way.”
“What’d you think?” Adriano seems genuinely curious. “She’s pretty, isn’t she? Told you I wouldn’t screw you over.”
“She’s pretty,” I agree, which is an understatement. She’s fucking gorgeous. She’s incredible. She’s a tanned goddess with luscious dark hair, a lithe athletic body, and an ass that makes my dick hard. He doesn’t need those details though.
“I think she’ll make a good wife too. I hear she’s a decent girl, you know what I mean? She follows the rules.”
“I can appreciate that.” Though I know my wife isn’t always the perfect little mafia princess she pretends to be. No, she had one night of sin. It just happened to be with me.
“Take care of her. She’s my cousin, and I want her to be happy.”
“I’ll provide for her.”
Adriano studies me. He frowns, and I can tell he doesn’t like my answer. But fuck him. That’s all I’ll promise.
Anything more would be a mistake.
I had one night with Carmie. One fucking night. And now she’s deeply stuck in my head. I’m goddamn obsessed with the girl, and what’s going to happen to me if I let loose with her while we’re actually married?
I’ll drown in her, that’s what.
Which is why I’m keeping her at a distance. For now, at least.
Adriano shakes my hand and leaves after that. I head back to Fed Jeweler, even though there’s not much more work to be done. It’s just that this is the only place in the world where I feel comfortable. This business practically raised me like a second father. I sit in the back, pour another drink, and start going through inventory even though everything’s been logged already.
I’m not surprised when the door opens. I look up, expecting Alex, but instead it’s Natalya. My sister slumps down into the chair across from me with a sigh, her pregnancy just barely starting to show. She rests a hand on the top of her belly and studies me, not smiling.
She’s the image of our mother. Blonde, petite, and pretty. Also, a pain in my fucking ass. I love her to death, and I’ll kill for her, but my god, she has caused me so many headaches over the years.
“I hear you finally met her,” Nat says. “How’d it go?”
“I’m sure Dad will tell you all about it.” I grin at her, and she snorts, shaking her head.
“I think Dad would rather throw me off a bridge than have a civil conversation with me.”
“Yeah, well, you ditched out on a wedding, ruined his plans, and got pregnant by my best friend. He’s understandably still coming to grips with it.”
“Seriously, what’d you think of her?”
I glance down at my drink. I thought she was perfect. That’s the problem. “She’s Italian. She’s pretty. She’ll be a perfectly acceptable wife.”
“Wow,” Nat says, eyebrows raising. “The sparks are truly flying.”
“Says the girl that ran out on her arrangement.”
“Fair enough, but come on. Did you guys hit it off at all?”
“She seemed fine. We didn’t exactly have enough time to get to know each other.” Which is only partly true. We had time that night; only we used it fucking like devils instead. “I’m okay, Nat.”
Her expression cracks. “You know how guilty I feel. If I had married Adriano like I was supposed to?—”
“It’s behind us now. Carmie seems decent. We’ll get along.”
We’ll fucking have to because I need her cousin’s muscle. But after my father’s dead? And I’m the head of the Federov family? I’m not so sure if we’ll need to stay together forever.
But that’s a problem for another time.
“If you need anything, you know you can come to me, right?”
I roll my eyes and throw a watch at her. She catches it and throws it back. I let it clatter to the floor. “You’ve been married for like a few months and suddenly you’re an expert.”
“I didn’t say that.”
“Yeah, yeah, the implication was clear. But seriously, I’m okay. Focus on you and your family, all right?”
“We’ll see.” She stretches and yawns. “You gonna be here late tonight?”
“That’s the plan. I’m surprised Alex let you out.”
“He’s tracking me through my phone.” She says it deadpan, and I honestly don’t know if she’s kidding or not. I decide I’d rather not know. “I just knew you’d be here, and I wanted to check in.”
“You checked. I’m good. Don’t let your conscience bug you anymore, okay?”
She shrugs, gets up, and gives me a hug. Once she’s gone, I turn back to the inventory in front of me and the glass of whiskey at my elbow.
Dad’s going to die. It’s been a long time coming. I’m doing it for myself—for control of the family, for the future of this store and everything we’ve built—but I’m also doing it for Nat and Alex and my future niece or nephew. That’s why I’m getting married too. All to keep them safe. All to protect what I care about the most in this world.
From that fucking monster.
My grip on my glass tightens, and I have to force myself to relax.
These fucking emotions. This darkness, this hunger. I thought I’d conquered them already, and it’s killing me that they’re back.
But I’m not a kid anymore, and this time, the real cause of my broken soul is going to suffer for all the fucked-up shit he did to me.
And I’ll never let him hurt anyone else.