Chapter 11
Chapter Eleven
Anastasia
I was an idiot. A blistering, horny idiot who could not keep it in her pants. I should have been ashamed of myself, and yet every single time I thought of that man my body got hot and my pussy throbbed.
Fuck .
I rolled into my pillow and let out a rather dramatic scream.
I had allowed that man to put his mouth on my pussy and eat me out until my legs were shaking and my head was hazy with lust. I had almost forgotten what my name was during the whole thing.
I was simply a woman who had yet to be pleased.
The last time I had allowed a man to touch me was almost three years ago. He was the first man to touch me in years. It felt riveting and thrilling.
I was sure that now he knew that I was not a virtuous woman. My innocence was gone, it had been gone for a while. I was surprised that he didn’t bring that up. But then again, the man’s mouth was a little busy.
The heat rose to my cheeks, eliciting another groan from my body. I needed to stop thinking about him.
I rolled over and looked at the ceiling. The sun had only just begun to peak beyond the horizon, but I had been up for almost two hours. My mind had done me a disservice by making me dream of that bathroom incident.
I woke up flushed, sweaty, and in need. It had taken all my internal strength to keep from walking out of my room and going to find him.
I wanted to fuck the man. If he could make me come that hard with his mouth, I feared what he would be able to do to me with his cock.
“No, no, no, bad girl.” I shot up in my bed and ran my hands over my face. “I am not going to fuck that man. I needed to keep my distance.”
This was for the best. I needed to remind myself that I was already a taken woman, no matter how single I felt. I was to be Sergei’s wife within the next coming months.
Unless I wanted to start an all-out war between my family and Sergei’s, I needed to play my part. What happened last night was a simple slip. I was human, I was allowed to have a slip. But I couldn’t make a habit of it.
I pulled the covers off my body and walked to the curtain to pull them open. The sky was painted orange and yellow as the sun rose to signal the start of a new day. The Valdez manor was impressive to say the least. It had pristine green grounds and perfectly pruned hedges. The room I had been given was one fit for royalty. It was large and expansive and was made up of entirely neutral tones. I had a bathroom all to myself and the entire western wing. Well, I shared it with one other person—the one that shall not be named.
I shook my head, trying to shake the little bathroom incident out. Today was a new day, and there was no need to revisit the past.
As long as I stayed away from him, then it would all be okay.
“I can stay away from him,” I said to myself. “Three months. I can keep my distance for three months.”
“You’re sulking.” I could feel Valerio’s eyes on me, but I kept my eyes trained outside the window.
I could not believe this. So much for my plan to stay away from him.
I was meant to be running some errands at the mall today. Savina had said that I could have a driver and an escort as per my brother’s request. So, color me shocked when I walked down the stairs and came face to face with the very man I was trying to avoid.
Apparently, Savina had entrusted him to keep watch over me. Him, the underboss of the Valdez family and dubbed Merchant of Death was going to be my keeper. Surely, he had better things to do than to babysit me, but he seemed quite content with the role he had been given.
“I’m not sulking.” I shot back keeping my eyes outside. “Can you shut up, please?”
This was the first time that I was seeing him since he had his mouth on my pussy. My cheeks had not cooled since I saw him downstairs. My mind kept running back to last night, and I hated it.
His strong cologne of pine and expensive leather filled the car, only making it much harder to ignore his overbearing presence.
“Anastasia.” He whispered my name, but I ignored him. “Are you ignoring me?”
My answer was silence.
“Silence? Really? It’s a stark contrast from all the screaming you were doing last—” I launched myself at him and placed my hand over his mouth. His eyes danced with humor, which only added to my anger.
My eyes darted to the driver at the front, who didn’t seem to be paying attention. But he had ears, which meant he could hear everything. What if he went and told someone what he heard? I couldn’t risk what happened last night getting out.
I was the virgin Russian Mafia Princess. I could not afford to be blemished. Least of all by the very man my brother loathed with his whole being. It astounded me how much drama resided in Mafia politics.
“Can we not discuss those issues so publicly?” I hissed at him.
Instead of responding, the man grabbed my wrist and pulled me toward him. I had not been expecting his sudden movements, so I fell right onto his chest. The closeness caused the butterflies to erupt in my stomach and my body temperature to heat.
I was doing a piss poor job at staying away from him. My eyes trailed up the side of his neck, tracing the sharp curves of his jawline and then all the way to his eyes. The blue and the gray melted into each other, darkening his irises. Something dangerous swam in them, like I was staring into the gaze of a predator.
I gulped. “Please, let me go.”
“You don't need to worry about my men, cielo . They report to me and only me. I will only ever allow the men that I trust the most to be around you, at all times. Our little secret is safe. ya ne skazhu, yesli ty ne skazhesh '.”
I won’t tell if you won’t.
I scurried out of his hold and, thankfully, he let me go and allowed me to return to my seat. There was no winning when it came to him. I was in over my head and avoiding him was proving to be far more difficult than I realized.
I settled into my seat and tore my gaze from the smug look on his face. He knew what he was doing, and that knowledge only pissed me off more. But regardless, I remained quiet in my seat while we made our way to the mall.
Two hours and several stores later, I had made a sizable dent in my brother’s card. He had told me that I could buy whatever I needed on his card to make my transition easier. And new bags and shoes were a much-needed comfort for me. I was sure that I was going to get a call from him soon enough when he woke up in Russia.
Valerio had been well-behaved for the most part. He kind of just sat and watched me. I felt his eyes on me from the moment we got out of the car until now. His gaze was unnerving, but there was something oddly comforting about his presence. He made me feel safe, in a weird way, seeing as he was the man who could get me into the biggest trouble.
We were on our way out of the mall when I stopped short, seeing the large La Rose sign. It was the same store my heart pendant was from. The same pendant that my mother had gifted me before her death.
"Let's go here." I was already making a beeline for the store.
"Haven't you shopped enough for one day?"
I looked over my shoulder at the overbearing shadow I had today. "There is no such thing as having enough of shopping."
I stopped short when I heard him scoff. I gave him an incredulous look and moved toward him.
“I’m also a woman who likes to soothe her heart with retail therapy,” I said to his face with a serious expression. “If you are tired, then you can head back to the car or send one of your other men to watch over me.”
“And let them be near you?” His eyes bored into mine. “Walk, cielo .”
“Will you ever tell me what that means?” I tilted my head to the side and observed him. “You call me that more than you say my name.”
He took one large step in my direction, successfully closing the distance between the two of us. The gentle hum that always began when we drew closer filled the space between us. We stood half an arm's length apart. His tall structure leered over me, and all I could focus on was his closeness.
My heart lurched in the middle of my chest. The memories of the night before filtered into my mind and against my will, my brain gripped onto the memory hard. The way his mouth had tasted my core and lapped me up like I was the most delicious-tasting thing on the face of the planet.
“Maybe one day,” he said before he breezed past me and made his way into the store. “You coming, Anastasia?”
It took me a few minutes to settle myself. I followed him into the store so I could get my bracelet.
I walked up to the large window glass that displayed the bracelets I wanted and moved along, taking in the intricate jewelry. My brother had given me his card if I needed it, and seeing as he was making me marry a monster, it was only fair that I maxed out his Amex.
I moved along the glass cabinets and came to the pendants. The heart necklace I wore was bought at one of these stores, a gift from my mother.
I looked over my shoulder to Valerio, but he had paused by the bracelets and was looking at one intensely. I saw something flash across his eyes. It was only for a brief moment, but it was the same look I had seen him have when he smashed his hand through the glass that day.
“You have that look,” I said, breaking through the thick silence. “The same one that you had that night when you broke the window.”
My eyes darted to his hand which was adorned with scars from the shards that had sliced his skin.
“I think you’re mistaken, Anastasia. Why don’t you just choose a damn band so we can leave?” His words came out short and biting.
“Something or someone hurt you.” I didn’t know why I was pressing the issue so much. There was no need for me to. I should have just let it go.
His eyes darkened. “Drop it, Anastasia.”
I knew the look he had in his eyes. It was a look of immense distress and fear. It was a look of being trapped and feeling like you had no way out.
Valerio always had this bravado about him. He was sharp, mysterious, and cold. But now I believed that was a protective layer that he had placed around himself to keep himself safe.
“I’m sorry that someone hurt you.” The words slipped past my lips before I could even stop them. But my heart was leading my words.
The darkness in his eyes took me slightly aback. It was hot and ferocious, and made me rethink opening my mouth.
“Just because you are abused in your own life doesn’t mean that we all were, Anastasia.” His words sliced through me like a double-edged sword. “I am not some little puzzle piece that you need to try and figure out. We aren’t all broken dolls that need to be glued back together.”
I flinched back like he had punched me in the face. His words were daggers that pierced the exposed areas. They were sharp, biting, and cruel.
I didn’t know if it felt cruel because of the tone he used, or if it felt cruel because of the truth behind them. There were moments when I did feel like a broken doll.
“I was only concerned, Valerio.”
My words only seemed to make him angrier. “Instead of worrying about people who are completely fine, why don't you worry about the fact that little miss virgin has been fucked before?”
My heart thudded to a dramatic halt.
“Tell me, does your brother know that his most prized possession is tainted? How many have tasted that sweet pussy of yours, Anastasia?”
“Fuck you.”
One side of his lips tilted up into a devilish smirk. “Oh, you wanted to last night. How many dicks has your mouth tasted? Tell me, did they fuck you with their mouth better than me?”
He was being crass and crude. I knew that he was only trying to deflect, but that did not negate the fact that his words were disgusting. He was speaking to me the way Sergei would, and it made my skin crawl.
My hand itched at my side, wanting to connect with his cheek but I held myself back. We were in public, and the last thing we needed was to make a scene. So instead, I steeled my back and mustered up a strength that I kept on reserve for moments such as these.
“You wish you were my best, Valerio.” I jutted my chin up in defiance. “Excuse me, I need some air.”
I turned to leave and, thankfully, he didn't follow me. I didn't look back to see if he was staying in the store. I needed to be as far away from him as possible, or else I would be responsible for assaulting one of the most powerful underbosses on the East Coast, and I was sure that the various security guards he had tailing me would have pulled a gun on me for it.
I didn’t know how long I wandered about the mall until I finally made it out to the car park where we had left the car. I had been expecting to find Valerio there, but he was nowhere in sight. According to the driver, Valerio had left and had told them to take me straight home after I was done.
Of course, from one prison to the next. My life was an endless cycle of golden cages, passed on from one powerful man to the next.
Valerio’s words echoed in my mind, only adding to my despondency. I did my best to push those thoughts far away into my mind before I got into the car and made my way back to the Valdez manor.
The car dropped me off at the front of the house. The driver rounded the car to open my door, and when I got out, I came face to face with a pair of blue-gray eyes that stopped me dead in my tracks.
Valerio leaned against the frame of the door with a lit cigarette in hand. His eyes stared at me as I got out of the car.
The wind blew through my dress, lifting the skirt ever so slightly. The wisps of hair that surrounded my face kissed my cheeks gently.
I needed to remind myself of how rude he had been earlier. I could not give this man grace; I was tired of allowing men in this world to do and say whatever they wanted to me. For Sergei, it was beyond my control. I could only submit myself to him to keep the arrangement. But with a man like Valerio, who I owed nothing to, I would not allow him to make me a punching bag.
I rolled my shoulders back and lifted my chin. The man had a massive effect on me, I knew that, so I needed to feign a confidence I knew I didn’t have when it came to him.
“Thank you.” I offered the driver a sweet smile which he returned.
I walked toward the door, keeping my eyes trained on the hardwood and not the man standing off to the side.
Maybe, if I pretended like he wasn’t there, then he would simply let me pass. But that hope soon died when I stepped onto the stoop.
Valerio immediately blocked my path with his body and stared down at me with a blank expression on his face. I tried to sidestep him, but he blocked me yet again. We continued this dance for a little while longer until my frustrations got the better of me and I snapped my neck upward to meet his gaze.
“What do you want now, Valerio? Surely you said everything you needed to say in the store.” I tried to keep any ounce of hurt from my lips. The last thing I needed was for this man to think that he had hurt my feelings.
Instead of answering me, Valerio took a large drag of his cigarette before he puffed out a plume of smoke. To his credit, he did blow the smoke away from my face. He went to go and drag it again, but I grabbed the thing and threw it onto the floor before grinding the sole of my shoe on it.
When I lifted my gaze to meet his eyes, amusement painted his features. His eyes danced over my face, from my eyes to my nose, then my lips, and then back again.
“I don’t have time for this,” I groaned. “Move, please.”
I tried to put as much conviction behind my tone as possible, but the nervousness of being close to him didn’t help me.
“I’m sorry.”
The words slipped past his lips so quickly I almost missed them.
“Excuse me?”
He licked his lips, and his eyes broke our stare off. “I said, I’m sorry.”
It wasn’t his words that got to me, but rather the look in his eyes. The sincerity swam through his pupils.
“The way I behaved in the shop was unacceptable on my part, and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that. You didn’t deserve my cruelty. I was just… caught off guard.”
I wanted to ask what he had been thrown off guard by, but he continued.
“You are a guest in my home, and I should have been more accommodating. You have my word that something like this will not happen again.”
To say I was taken aback would be an understatement. Men in this world did not know how to say the word sorry. They behaved how they wanted to, and everyone was simply meant to bend at their will. For him to come forward and apologize, and not only that but having sincerity in his tone, meant a lot to me. My defenses dropped a little, but not all the way, because I was no idiot. His apologies didn’t mean that he was a changed man. He was still Valerio Valdez. He was dangerous, and someone I needed to be weary of, especially with Sergei being my husband-to-be.
“I accept your apology.” I swallowed hard, trying to keep my body under control. “But we need to keep our distance from each other, Valerio. What happened last night can’t happen again. It was a mistake, and we can chalk it all off as an accident.”
The gleam in his eyes vanished at my words. He narrowed his stare. “What happened last night was no mistake. I didn’t mistakenly put my mouth on your pussy and lap you up. What happened last night was meant to be.”
Why did he need to make things so difficult for me?
Valerio reached his hand out and gripped my chin with his large palm. His hold on me was a little hard, but not so much that it caused me pain. In fact, that slight discomfort actually excited me a little.
What the hell was wrong with me?
“You can keep trying to hide from this, from us, but just know that we are inevitable. Everything changed the day of that accident. We became one without even realizing it.” My breath caught at his words. He spoke with so much certainty that there was a small part of me that wanted to believe him. “I am yours, Anastasia, and you belong to me. You can wear another man’s ring; you can even think you will marry him. But the truth of the matter is that there will never be anyone for you like me.”
He drew his face only a few centimeters from mine. The proximity excited and riveted me. His hot breath fanned my face, making my entire system short-circuit.
“So run if you must.” He was so close now that I felt the slight brush of his lips against mine. That small contact alone was enough to have tingles surge throughout my entire body. But just as the anticipation had peaked, he withdrew, leaving me yearning for more. “I enjoy the chase, cielo .”
He stepped away from me looking rather satisfied that he had managed to get me into this state. He had a way of breaking down whatever protective wall I had around myself. Very few had ever bested me in that regard, and it irked me that he managed it so easily.
“See you at dinner, Anastasia.” And with that, he stepped around me and made his way to his parked McLaren, which looked oddly similar to the one that he had crashed that fateful day.
I didn’t dare look back as I entered the house for fear of staring into his eyes again. The last thing that I needed right now was to find myself lost in him again.
This was a very dangerous line I was treading, and one misstep could lead to death. Particularly, mine.