Chapter Twenty
Anthony
I can’t believe I’m doing this, can’t believe I’m flying to Wisconsin to meet Kason Maddox’s family.
My boyfriend’s family.
What is even happening right now in my world?
What am I going to do if they hate me?
Kason hires a driver to take us to the airport. He pulls up out front at departures and comes around my side to open the door for us. We climb out, and the driver gets our bags from the back. I give him a tip, and then Kason takes my hand and we head for the door.
It’s early morning, the sun not even up yet, but LAX is already packed. Paparazzi often hang out here, hoping for a celebrity sighting or ten. I really hope we don’t run into anyone. That’s the last thing I want to deal with. I’m already losing my shit.
“You good?” Kason asks me when we get inside.
“Fine. Just freaking out, is all,” I joke.
He wraps an arm around me. “It’ll be fine. Perfect. My family is so chill. You have nothing to worry about.”
“Is that where you got it?”
“I guess. Maybe. We’ve always been close. We never had a lot. My sister is my best friend.”
“Oh, I won’t tell Rylan that.”
He chuckles. “We just…love each other. That’s it. We support each other. And now they’ll love and support you too, just like I do.”
My heart stumbles, maybe dies a little, but then I guess gets jump-started since I don’t collapse and die right here.
He’s not saying he’s in love with me. He just meant that as a figure of speech.
It’s just a thing people say—they’re going to love you like I do!
I need to breathe and not spiral in this way that no one has ever made me do before Kason…
because no one has meant as much as he does.
“What?” he asks.
“Nothing,” I lie. I totally get why Donovan and Hayes both went wild when they were falling for Rylan and Eric. This shit is stressful as fuck.
We make it through security and into our first-class seats without any hassle. The flight is just under four hours, but it feels like four minutes later when we’re deplaning in Milwaukee.
It’s me who reaches out and takes Kason’s hand this time, needing him for support.
“It’ll be good. I promise,” he says, and damn, I hate being like this.
It’s like that scared boy I used to be is trying to push to the surface again.
I thought he left a long time ago, but he’s still there, hiding, waiting for something important to remind me I’m still afraid I’ll lose people I love.
The second I see them, I recognize his sister from photos in Kason’s house. Her partner, a Black woman with short twists in her hair, is standing beside her.
“Buttface!” Courtney yells, and comes running.
Kason drops his bag, opens his arms, and lifts her when she jumps into them.
They hug and laugh, the joy at seeing each other palpable.
I can’t stop myself from smiling, riding their energy.
What is it like having a family that loves you so much?
It’s so beyond anything I’ve ever experienced that I can’t even imagine.
“They’re always like this,” Courtney’s wife, Aline, says.
“It’s sweet,” I reply, just as he lets her down. “I’m Anthony.”
“Aline. Nice to meet you.” She gives me a hug. The second she lets go, all of Courtney’s attention is on me.
“The boyfriend.” She grins.
“The one and only.” I curtsy, pretending not to be as nervous as I am. It’s fairly easy for me to play the part. The only people who ever know it’s not real are the Jilted Exes and now Kason.
“I’ve heard so much about you. Kason never shuts up about you. I feel like I’ve known you for years. He’s never been like this before, if you were wondering.” Courtney smiles.
“Thanks for throwing me under the bus, sis.”
“Tell me everything,” I joke, making Courtney and Aline laugh. “Also…if you were to meet my friends, they would probably say I never shut up about him either,” I admit, wanting them to know he’s important to me too.
Courtney clutches her heart. “So sweet. I like you already. Welcome to the family, Anthony.” She wraps her arm around me and starts walking toward the door, pulling me along. I look over my shoulder at Kason, who’s grinning from ear to ear, he and Aline watching us go.
Maybe this won’t be so bad after all.
*
Kason’s parents live about thirty minutes out of the city.
Courtney tossed Kason the car keys the second we got outside, and she hasn’t stopped talking to me since.
She is energy personified, sweet and caring like Kason, but louder, and honestly, a little more hardcore than him.
Aline is great too, the calm to Courtney’s wilder personality, just as Kason said.
They look at each other often, reach over and offer small touches, the love between them so strong, I can feel it.
My gaze keeps darting to Kason. Is this really possible? For the two of us to have something like what they have?
Their parents are just as open and accepting when we arrive.
Kason is tall like his dad, has his eyes, but Harvey’s hair is lighter.
Kason has the same smile as his mom, the same dark brown hair.
Each of them pulls me into a hug, telling me how happy they are I could join Kason this weekend, and with every second that goes by, more of my fear evaporates.
Kason shows me to his room.
“This isn’t the house you grew up in, right?” I seem to recall him mentioning he bought them one, and this one looks new.
“No, but my parents made sure I have a room here when I come to visit. That’s the way they are. Court has one too.”
“They’re great.”
“You’re great.” He wraps his arms around me.
“You have to think that because you’re my boyfriend.”
“You’re my boyfriend because you’re so fucking great.” He winks, then kisses me. “Queen bed here, which means we get to sleep even closer.”
“No sex at your parents’ house!” All I need is for them to hear me getting dicked down by their son.
“Okay,” he says easily. “Come on. Let’s go downstairs.”
We leave our bags there and head back to the living room, where his family is waiting. From what I learned on the way here, Courtney and Aline have a small place about fifteen minutes away. Both work in Milwaukee and make the short commute during the week.
“How did you two meet?” his mom, May, asks.
“One of my best friends, Hayes, is dating Rylan,” I say, avoiding anything Jilted Exes related. I doubt they’ll ask how Hayes and I are friends, so I’m thinking about that for nothing.
“I had a crush from the start.” Kason winks at me.
“Oh my God. No you didn’t.” I nudge him with my elbow. He said he was interested early, but that’s different from a crush.
“How do you know? Maybe I did and haven’t told you.”
“Maybe I had a crush on you and didn’t tell you either,” I toss back.
“Of course you did. I’m a catch,” he teases, and everyone in the room laughs.
I swear, this man. Is there anyone, anyone who doesn’t love him? Not that he doesn’t deserve it. He’s so charming, he makes it impossible not to like him.
“Kason says you’re a dancer?” May asks. While Harvey seems very kind, I think Kason got his friendliness from his mom. She’s the one who talks more.
“Yeah, I’m…” My words end there. For a moment I’m almost embarrassed to tell them what I do.
They already know, anyway, but even if they didn’t, there’s nothing wrong with dancing in a bar.
Malcolm would try to make me feel like shit about it, and those headlines played on the insecurity Malcolm tried to instill in me, but fuck that.
I like what I do. I’m proud of what I do, and I’m not ever going to let myself feel bad about it again.
“I do. I work at Lush, one of the queer clubs in West Hollywood…well, I own it, actually, but no one knows. They all think I’m just a dancer and manager. ”
The room goes quiet like they’re trying to wrap their heads around that.
I get it. Why do I hide that I’m the owner?
But in my head I always had this fear of being liked for what I have rather than who I am.
Like that situation when I was younger, after I’d been living with my uncle for a while, when I thought I found a crew of friends on the dance team, only to hear them talking about how they didn’t like me, but pretended they did because my uncle donated money to the program.
“Well, you can’t just drop that bomb on us and not explain,” Aline tells me.
And for the first time, the impulse to change the subject or not be truthful is absent. I’m just…tired of that. I want to be better. I want to grow.
“Fear,” I answer honestly. “I’ve struggled a lot in my relationships—friendships and otherwise—so I’ve learned to protect myself, but that’s in the past.” Reaching over, I set my hand on Kason’s thigh. I feel his gaze on me, then the warmth of his hand on top of mine.
Somehow, without looking, I know he’s smiling.