Chapter 41
Josephine
Kylian rinses the last plate and loads it into the dishwasher with meticulous precision as I watch on.
The others cooked, so he’s on dish duty tonight.
They’re all surprisingly domestic for college guys.
They’ve lived together for several years, so I suppose they’ve had time to fine-tune their process and figure out a schedule so they operate as a well-oiled machine.
Kylian insisted he didn’t want my help with the dishes, so I made myself an ice cream cone and have been making a show of eating it with slow, deliberate licks.
He closes the dishwasher, turns it on, washes his hands, then pounces.
“You. Are. Trouble,” he snarls against my lips. He dives in then, kissing me roughly and licking the ice cream right out of my mouth.
“Took you long enough to notice,” I tease, leaning forward to kiss him deeper.
Holding my face in both hands, he pulls back, just slightly.
“I’ve told you before, baby. I notice every move you make.
I’ve just gotten very, very good at masking my reactions over the years.
Don’t think for one second I wasn’t watching you out of the corner of my eye and trying to ignore my hard-on. ”
“I love that you watch me.” I kiss him again, slower and sweeter this time. “I know I’m always safe with you.”
He steps forward and situates himself between my legs where they dangle off the island, running both hands up and down my bare thighs and pressing our foreheads together.
“You’re tired.” I realize now that I’m close enough to get a good look at him.
Kylian has very few tells. Not that he willingly shares, at least. Each time I recognize one, I’m hit with a warmth in my chest. Because I’m privileged enough to see him as he truly is.
He’s given me that trust, and he knows I’ll always look out for him, even when he’s not on full alert or firing on all cylinders.
He nods once, then kisses my nose. “Do you want to come up to the Nest tonight?”
Do I want to? The answer is yes—it’s always yes—but he won’t sleep if I do. I’m not tired in the least, and there’s something else I still need to do before I go to bed.
I rest my chin on his shoulder, relishing the feel of being wrapped up in him.
“I’m not tired. And I need to find Decker,” I admit.
Kylian traces my spine with his knuckles as I kiss the exposed skin along the neckline of his T-shirt.
“He’s probably in the weight room. Still brooding,” he murmurs into my hair.
I scoff. “When isn’t he brooding?”
He works his hands up my back and over my shoulders until his thumbs graze my jaw. Pulling back, he looks me in the eye. “Just be careful, Jo. Earlier… that was a lot. He’s been pushed enough tonight.”
The warning hits. It wasn’t easy for Decker to compromise and give up that kind of control, and that’s exactly why I want to go find him now.
I bite down on my bottom lip anyway.
“Yes, Daddy,” I taunt, knowing full well it’ll get a reaction out of my typically serious boyfriend.
Fire sparks in his eyes, and he smashes his mouth to mine in a bruising kiss. “Don’t start something you don’t have time to finish, baby.”
I smile even as he ravages my mouth, letting him feed me his tongue as I lean back in submission. Kylian kisses like he wants to consume me—like he doesn’t need food or water or air as long as he has me.
“I love you. Do you know that?” he asks, pulling back just enough that I can see his eyes behind his glasses.
Heart leaping in my chest, I rear back at the admission he just offered so freely.
“I do now.” I gulp past the emotion in my throat, at a complete loss for words. What the hell is the appropriate response to such an out-of-the-blue statement? No one has ever said those words to me. Ever.
“Is that okay?” he asks, brushing his nose against mine. “For me to love you?”
My chest constricts so tightly it’s hard to breathe as my eyes well with tears and my bottom lip quivers. I nod as I struggle to hold it together.
It’s more than okay. So much fucking more than just okay.
But until this moment, I didn’t know the extent of his feelings. Not for sure.
I hoped. Wished. Wondered.
The way in which this man loves me is more than I could have ever dreamed of—more than I deserve.
“Jo,” he hedges, using both thumbs to brush away the tears I can’t hold back. “Talk to me.”
“Happy tears,” I manage to get out through a sniffle.
Relief washes over his features, and he leans in to kiss away the paths of moisture streaking my cheeks.
“So you like when I say that? I can keep telling you I love you?”
Safety. Acceptance. Adoration. Care.
Kylian loves me.
Kylian loves me.
Kylian is so damn good at loving me.
I nod again, not trusting my voice not to waver. But apparently, that’s not enough.
“Words, Jo. Use your words.”
“Yes. I like it. Never stop saying it,” I plead, tempted to say it back to him immediately.
“Good girl,” he murmurs, kissing me once more. Then he’s lifting me off the island as if I weigh nothing and setting me on my feet. Once he’s sure I have my footing, he steps back and swats at my ass playfully.
“Now go find Cap.”
I snort. He can’t be serious.
Planting my hands on my hips, I raise both eyebrows. “Really?”
He surveys me, brow furrowed. “What?” he finally asks.
“You kiss me senseless, tell me you love me for the first time, then send me on my way to go find your friend?”
His expression softens, a smile playing across his face at my sassy recap.
He hovers closer, cupping my face in his hands once again.
“That’s a fair assessment. It may have been the first time I said the words out loud to you, but it’s been my reality for weeks, Jo.
I love you. I’m in love with you. Things just finally feel…
settled enough that I thought I could say it without scaring you off. ”
Oh.
“Besides,” he adds, nipping my bottom lip playfully. “I’m still taking that flight on Friday, so we’ll have the house to ourselves on Thursday night and Friday morning. I plan to fuck you six different ways and leave you so satisfied you’ll feel how much I love you the entire time I’m gone.”
My core clenches at the very prospect. But the hit of desire is quickly replaced by one of trepidation.
“Do you want me to say it back?” I ask quietly, pressing a palm to his chest.
“No, baby,” he replies instantly. “I don’t need to hear the words.” He places the softest kiss on my lips, confirming his sincerity. Not that I would ever question it. Kylian always says what he means and means what he says. “I feel your love every single day.”
He pulls away then, turning me by the shoulders and nudging me in the direction of the weight room.
“Go find Decker before he goes to bed.”