Chapter 9
DROGO
I left her in the cold night air after the show, her back turned to me like I'd turned mine. I rode home hating myself. But I couldn't stay away. One last night. One last chance to hold her before I disappeared.
I killed the engine under her building, the Ducati ticking as it cooled in the night air.
Last night in London.
Tomorrow—Heathrow. New York. My father.
One last night with her.
I didn't know when—or if—I'd be back.
The show tonight had destroyed me. Watching her on that stage, owning every second, while I sat there knowing I'd have to disappear. Knowing she'd wake up and I'd be gone. No explanation. No goodbye.
Just gone.
I used my key. Slipped in quiet, boots left at the door. Stripped to boxers in the dark, dropping clothes on her chair like I'd done a thousand times before.
Slid into bed beside her.
Then froze.
Completely naked.
She was completely fucking naked.
No shirt. No shorts. Nothing.
Just bare skin against the sheets, her back to me, the curve of her hip visible in the dim light.
"The fuck?" I breathed, pulling back slightly.
My cock went instantly hard. Painfully hard.
She stirred, turned her head slightly, eyes barely opening. "Mm?"
"Why are you—" I gestured vaguely at her naked body. "You're naked."
She blinked slowly, still half-asleep. "I'm hot."
Yeah. No shit.
"If you have a problem with it," she mumbled, already drifting back, "go sleep in your own bed. Or the couch."
Then her eyes closed and she was gone again, breathing evening out.
Leaving me there. Hard as a fucking rock. Staring at her naked back.
I should leave. Should go to the couch like she said. This was torture.
But this was my last night with her.
Last night to hold her. To breathe her in. To pretend, for just a few more hours, that I wasn't about to destroy everything.
I won't let my cock take away the last moments I have with her.
I moved closer, carefully, and wrapped my arms around her. Pulled her back against my chest.
She sighed, settling into me, her body fitting perfectly against mine like it always did.
My cock pressed against her ass—hard, insistent, impossible to ignore. But I held still. Breathed through it. Focused on the weight of her in my arms, the rhythm of her breathing, the scent of her hair.
This. Just this. One last time.
Minutes passed. Maybe ten. Maybe twenty. She shifted in her sleep, unconscious, natural.
And pushed her ass back against my thigh.
I felt it immediately.
Wet.
Her pussy, pressed against my thigh, was soaking wet.
Slick heat coating my skin. Dripping.
My breath caught. Every muscle in my body locked down.
She was asleep. Completely asleep. And dripping next to me.
Christ.
I shouldn't. I know I shouldn't.
But my hand moved anyway—slowly, carefully. Slid down her stomach, over the curve of her hip, between her thighs.
Fingers slipped through slick folds. So wet. So ready. Even in sleep.
I circled her clit—slow, light, testing.
She moaned—low, sleepy, needy. Hips rocking forward, chasing the pressure.
My cock throbbed against her ass. Leaking. Demanding.
I pressed harder. Rubbed tight circles. Her thighs trembled. Her breath came faster.
I slid one finger inside her—slow, careful.
The wet sound was obscene. Loud in the quiet room.
Tight. Hot. Wet. She clenched around me instantly.
Jesus.
I added a second finger. Pumped gently. Thumb still on her clit.
Another wet sound. Slick. Filthy. I must stop.
This is wrong. This is abuse. I am abusing my Alena, but I can’t stop.
I can’t pull my fingers away and fuck, I want to take them out.
I feel my fingers push deeper. And slowly pulling out, only to push deeper again.
And again. Shit I am finger fucking her in her sleep.
What the fuck is wrong with me? I must stop. Damn why can’t I stop? I…
She whimpered—hips rocking, riding my hand.
Her moans grew louder—sleepy, desperate. Body arching, offering more. And I took more. I pressed my fingers deeper. The pussy stretched as the second knuckle past her entrance. She is so fucking tight. Fuck this is so wrong. I pull and push deeper.
Then her eyes fluttered open.
Panic shot through me.
"I'm sorry," I breathed, freezing. "Shit, I'm sorry—"
I started to pull my fingers out.
Her hand caught my wrist. Held it there.
"It's not the first time," she murmured, voice thick with sleep and want. "It's okay."
My heart hammered. What? Yeah, ok it’s not the first time my hand is on her clit, but my fingers were never in her. What is she talking about? Why is she saying that this is, ok? It is not. I finger fucked her. "Alena—"
She pressed my hand harder against her. Guided my fingers deeper. My heart stopped as a slow wet sound filled the room and both of my fingers were deep in her. She left a soft moan in the air and rolled her hips taking me even deeper.
"It's okay," she whispered again.
I froze completely. What the hell is happening?
Then her other hand moved. Slid up. Found my cock through my boxers.
Wrapped around it.
Started stroking.
I lost it completely. My breath left my lips violently. She started jerking my dick slowly from top to the base. My vision left me for a moment, and my hand grabbed her pussy hard making her scream as her nails dig in my forearm.
Then, like a bucket of ice hit my face, reality crashed in. This is us. And I am gone in the morning. Jerked away, pulling my hand from between her legs, scrambling off the bed.
"Shit—sorry, I'm sorry—" I backed toward the bathroom, hard as steel, shaking. "I'm going to the bathroom. To take care of it. I'm sorry."
She sat up, watching me with those dark eyes. Hair wild. Lips parted. Body still flushed.
I fled before I did something even more stupid.
· · ·
I stood in the bathroom, hands braced on the sink, cock throbbing, mind spinning.
What just happened?
She'd pressed my hand back. She'd touched me. She'd—
I heard the bedroom door close.
Wait.
I opened the bathroom door slowly.
Empty bedroom.
Then I heard it. The front door. Opening. Closing.
She left.
Dammit. She left because I freaked out. My heart stopped and my knees started to give. If she leaves, if she is freaked because of me, because of this I am putting a gun to my temple.
No—wait. Footsteps. Coming back.
I stepped out of the bathroom just as she appeared in the doorway.
Still naked in front of me.
"I locked the door," she said simply. "So you can't run."
My breath caught.
She walked toward me. Slow. Deliberate.
"Alena—"
"Do you want me to stop?" she asked, stopping an inch away.
Every rational thought screamed yes. Stop. This will ruin everything. We still have time to fix this. Go back to how it was between us.
But my mouth betrayed me.
"I want you to kneel."
Damn. I just said that.
Dear Lord, she's doing it.
I haven't known terror before this moment. Control yourself, man. I can feel I'm on the verge of shaking.
She dropped to her knees in front of me and I nearly lost it right there. Seventeen years of wanting this, of burying this, and now she's on her knees looking up at me with those eyes.
Her hands found the sides of my hips, fingers hooking into the waistband of my boxers.
"Is this, okay?" she asked softly.
Is this, okay? Really? Damn woman, you can cut it off if you want. It—I—was yours all along.
I can't find the words to respond. I just fist my hand in the back of her head, pulling her hair a bit. Christ, it was years I'd been imagining pulling her hair in that position.
She lowered my boxers and my dick fell free in front of her face.
For a second, neither of us moved. She just stared at it, and I watched her throat move as she swallowed.
Then her eyes lifted to mine—checking, asking permission one more time even though we'd already crossed the line.
Her lips approached the head of my dick and in a second my fingers fisted her hair and pulled her head back. Her eyes wide met mine.
"If you take my cock in your mouth, there is no going back after.
I am done, Alena, and I mean it. Your lips touch me, you are mine.
" I bend down to meet her eyes more. "Do you understand?
You will belong to me. Completely." She swallows.
Maybe she understands the stakes now. Good.
Let her make a decision. "No man will ever see you naked.
No shows where you make me wanna burn down the whole place, nothing.
No man will ever touch you. You belong to me.
Only. Until both of us are dead." I leaned closer.
She was looking at me in shock. "And then babe, after we are dead, you belong to me after.
There is no place, no dimension, nothing, that you can leave. Do you understand?"
Her eyes locked on mine for some moments. Then, they dropped to my dick. I guess she is looking for a way out because she knows, when I say something that's it. I mean every word.
One second later, her lips parted as she grabbed my cock and guided it to her mouth.
Then lightning struck my body.
Her lips wrapped around the head of my dick and her tongue followed, and I had no idea how I was still standing.
I closed my eyes as my head dropped back. Yeah, now you're mine.
Her tongue swirled around the head, slow, teasing, then took me deeper. Wet heat. Suction. The sound of her mouth on me filled the room—filthy, perfect, obscene.
I saw stars.
"Christ," I breathed, watching her. I couldn't look away. Seventeen years and I'd never let myself imagine this. Never let myself think about those lips around me. But now it was real and it was so much better than any fantasy I'd never let myself have.
She sucked me hard—wet, sloppy sounds filling the silence. Her full lips traveled low as she took me deeper, close to halfway in. Saliva dripping down her chin. Beautiful.
My head fell back, eyes closing, a groan ripping from my throat.
That sound—her mouth on me, wet and hungry—was the most erotic thing I'd ever heard.
Then I felt it. Her tongue rolled around the head and I lost it. I wanted more. Now.
My confidence surged. Restraint shattered.
I fisted her hair with both hands and pushed her down, guiding her onto my cock.
"That's it," I growled. "Take it. Take all of me."
She gagged slightly, eyes watering, but didn't pull away. Just looked up at me with those dark eyes, letting me use her mouth.
The wet, choking sounds drove me wild.
I pulled her head back, then pushed her down again. Harder this time. Setting the pace.
Her hands gripped my thighs for balance as I fucked her mouth—slow, deep thrusts that made her moan around me.
"Such a good girl," I breathed, voice rough, almost unrecognizable. "Taking my cock so well."
I heard myself moaning—loud, shameless. I never moaned. Never. Now I was singing with pleasure, trembling as she worked me.
She pulled back slightly for air, saliva connecting her lips to my cock, then dove back down—eager, determined.
Her hand came up to grip what she couldn't fit in her mouth, working me in tandem with her lips. Her other hand grabbed my balls and my knees almost met the ground. One hand left her hair and I grabbed the wall behind me. Something to support me so I could stand.
The room filled with filthy sounds—wet sucking, my groans, her muffled moans.
I looked down at her—lips stretched around me, eyes watering, completely wrecked—and nearly lost it right there.
This was Alena. Mine. Finally, mine.
"Shit..." I heard myself say. "Alena... I'm close..."
I tried to pull away—give her a choice.
But her nails dug into my hips, pulling me back, shoving my dick deeper into her throat.
The message was clear: Give it to me.
That broke me.
I grabbed that fucking amazing hair with both hands and thrust deep, coming hard in her throat.
She took everything. Every drop. Swallowing around me, milking me dry, tongue working me through the aftershocks.
I nearly screamed from pleasure, whole body shaking, barely keeping myself upright.
I'd had good head before. Great head, even. But this? This was different. This was Alena. This was seventeen years of wanting finally breaking free.
I looked down at her—lips swollen, eyes dark, still on her knees—and felt something crack inside me.
Seventeen years of restraint shattered in seconds.
I was hers. Completely.
And I was about to leave her.
She pulled off slowly, my dick fell heavy and half hard still in front of her. Licking her lips, and her eyes found mine.
Still on her knees. Still looking up at me with those dark eyes that had haunted every dream I'd pretended not to have.
"Was that what you meant? I am yours now?" she asked, her voice rough.
I couldn't answer. It was too good to be true. After all these years, was this really happening?
Tomorrow I leave. Tomorrow I disappear and she'll hate me. But now she is chained to me. And that will not change. Not even with my absence. Tomorrow I will leave to come back to her.
But tonight—
"Yes," I managed.
"Good." She said it simply, like we'd just decided on Thai food instead of crossing the one line we'd sworn we'd never cross.
Our eyes met and neither of us talked. Was it silent for a second? A minute? An hour or a year? I don't know. The air between us was thick with everything we'd never said. Everything we'd avoided. Everything that was now impossible to take back.
I looked down at her, still catching my breath, body humming from what she'd just done to me. She was on her knees, lips swollen, eyes dark and locked on mine—looking like every forbidden dream I'd ever had.
My voice came out low, rough. "You okay, baby? Need a minute?"
She shook her head slowly, not breaking eye contact. Her hands slid up my thighs, steadying herself but also claiming territory.
"No," she whispered, voice husky, certain.
Then she said the words that nearly stopped my heart.
"I want you to lick me."
Her voice was low, certain. Eyes locked on mine.