Chapter 14
SERGEI
The sound of my fist striking a still-too-warm body lacked the satisfaction I needed.
Every grunt fueled my rage into a punch that was twice as hard as the one before.
My knuckles were bleeding under the impact, the pain radiating up my wrists and straining the muscles in my arms, but I didn’t regret turning down the gloves Dezi had offered me fifteen minutes ago when I’d started this concert of fist upon flesh.
I welcomed the pain from the ache in my chest left there from Leo’s disappearance.
My fist connected with his jaw, and the man fastened to the wooden cross twisted, doubling over—at least he tried to—but the chains that secured his arms and legs made it impossible for him to curl into himself.
A tooth flew across the room and pinged off the concrete floor.
From my peripheral vision, I saw Nik wince and scratch the back of his head as he eyed the direction the tooth had gone.
“Stop! Please, I can’t take it anymore,” Blu mumbled from swollen lips.
I hadn’t been at all surprised that the asshole was the one who’d spiked the nurse’s drink spitefully after I’d fired him.
She wasn’t the only one he’d targeted either, but thankfully, none of the others had been affected the way she had, or we would have had a much bigger problem on our hands.
It’d taken scrubbing through hours of footage from our cameras, but we’d seen the exact moment he’d bumped into her and spilled her drink, using it as an excuse to order another.
We’d had our own coroner examine the body, and the results came back definitive for drugs, though it would take longer to identify the exact substance.
Whatever had been slipped into her drink was fast acting and unforgiving.
The concentration found in her system would have overwhelmed her almost immediately. She hadn’t stood a chance.
It also meant a new unauthorized drug was circulating in our territory.
With Vasiliev dead, there was no one to regulate the distribution, so we had a serious issue on our hands.
If people started showing up dead in our territory from the same drug, this would attract cops into our area, and then they might discover things they shouldn’t.
While cops could be bought, we preferred not to deal with them at all.
Since their integrity could be bought, they were loyal to nothing but profit.
This territory had always dealt in drugs outside of the club, long before Maxim handed it over to me, but it wasn’t chaotic, and certainly not this careless.
We kept it controlled with a tight distribution, vetted supply, and measured quantities.
No cut corners, no unknown product flooding the streets, no desperation deals made in back alleys.
Everything that moved through our hands was accounted for.
The profit was there—more than most legitimate businesses would ever see—but in the grand scheme of Morozov Holdings, it was nothing.
Maxim tolerated it because it stayed contained and kept his men happy, but the moment the drug distribution threatened his legitimate business, he wouldn’t hesitate to burn the whole operation to the ground.
I had no personal investment in the drug business, but I was handed the territory, so it was my mess to clean up.
If I pulled the plug prematurely, we would face internal opposition, and we couldn’t afford for factions to form when we still had no idea of the extent to which Arkady might be involved.
Our areas were close enough that the territory lines had caused conflicts in the past, and the drugs must have slipped in through him.
“You fucked up, man,” Nik said with a sigh, placing his hands akimbo as he casually observed Blu. “Should have just taken your last paycheck and left.”
“I’ve worked for Morozov for five years,” Blu mumbled. “You can’t do this to me.”
I grabbed him by the hair, and the blood on my knuckles smeared the strands.
For a second, I froze, words failing me as thoughts flooded my mind.
Leo, who would have scolded me about being careless with another person’s bodily fluid instead of wearing gloves.
Leo, who had kissed me, then left me. Leo, who could be dead for all I knew since I hadn’t heard from him or had any sign of life in a week.
“Sergei.”
Nik’s voice pulled me back from the deep forest of my mind.
I released Blu’s hair and took a step back.
I had blood all over me, not just my hands, but my T-shirt and even my sneakers.
That tended to happen when your brain insisted on beating the shit out of someone who deserved it because the man you thought was opening up to you left you without a word.
“This is your last chance, Blu.” I nodded at Dezi to hand me the gun he still held.
I took it from him, the weight of the barrel in my hand familiar.
I’d killed so many men over the years that the act was practically automatic now.
That thing people said about remembering the face of every life you took?
Fucking bullshit. After a while, the faces blurred until they no longer mattered.
“Who’s distributing the drugs?”
“If I tell you, do I walk?”
“Yeah, man,” Dezi said, clearly frustrated with how long this was taking. He’d been ready to kill the second we entered the door.
“No,” I said quickly in refute as I turned the safety off. “But if you tell me, I can make it quick, so you don’t suffer unnecessarily.”
I’d already done Leo too many wrongs. If I let this scumbag walk after he killed one of Leo’s colleagues, there would be one too many things for him to forgive.
If he comes back.
“Then fuck you,” Blu spat. “It’s too late to stop it anyway. Many of us are loyal to Vasiliev, not Morozov.”
“Vasiliev is dead,” I said softly. “If men like you would rather play stupid games, then don’t mind me for choosing the reward you deserve. And make no mistake, Blu. With or without you, I’ll find every single one of them in this enterprise.”
Successive bullets left both kneecaps shattered and Blu openly weeping.
I had to give him credit for still holding on to the information I wanted.
He was determined to die with his secrets, so I let him in the most agonizing way.
A gunshot wound in the gut that had blood pouring out of him in a stream.
“Stay with him and make sure he’s dead,” I said to Dezi. “You know what to do with the body.”
Unlike the nurse, whose body we’d sent back to her family in the most respectful way, it would be long, if ever, for Blu’s remains to be found.
Dezi nodded. “Can I at least have a little fun with him? I’m afraid I’ll be bored if he takes too long to die.”
“Be my guest.” It was none of my business that Dezi got off on torture.
I couldn’t get to the adjoining room fast enough to discard my clothes. Nik walked in as I stood by the sink washing my hands, wearing nothing but my boxers.
“Here.” He’d brought in my change of clothes and my boots from the car. He settled the boots on the floor by the sink and hung the clothes on the peg behind the door.
“Thanks.”
From the mirror, I watched him stare at the tattoo on my neck. “Interesting new ink.”
It wasn’t. I’d just tattooed over where Leo had left his teeth mark on my body the one time we’d been together.
To stamp the memory permanently into my skin before it faded.
Just in case he never marked me like that again.
I knew it was pathetic, a rash moment of decision born out of panic, due to his disappearance. But I had no regrets.
“Hmm,” I grunted, and reached for the shirt on the rack.
“The doctor still not back yet?” Nik asked.
“No.”
“Still have no clue where he is?”
“No.”
I buttoned my shirt, then slipped on my slacks. On the outside, I was the picture of perfect calm. On the inside? Every word Nik said felt like someone was drilling into my bones.
“You have to give it to him, though,” Nik said. “Him being able to disappear without a trace. People usually leave clues behind unintentionally.”
“He’s not an ordinary man.” And that scared me most of all. Leo wasn’t like the criminals we dealt with daily. He was too smart for his own damn good, and men who tried to be smart often wound up dead.
“So, you really got the doc in the sack?”
I halted tucking my shirt in it. “Why’d you think that?”
I never mentioned what had happened between Leo and me to anyone.
If I had secrets, Nik was the last person I would tell.
Darius was discreet, but Jess was a blabbermouth.
She kept nothing from her best friend—my boss’s husband—and the last thing I wanted was for Maxim to find out about my obsession with Leo.
“I admit, before now, I had no idea what went down between you and him,” Nik said. “But it all added up after seeing that tattoo. It made sense why he ran away.”
“He didn’t—”
But didn’t he?
We spent one moment—okay, two, if counting me humping his leg—together, and he ran off the same day.
Maybe I’d pushed him, expected too much too fast, but he was the one who’d walked into the bathroom with the condom and lube.
I’d been perfectly fine beating my dick to the tune of my imagination until he’d walked in and put me on my knees.
“You’re thinking too much about it,” he said. “I’m sure he’ll be back. Probably scared that he fucked you. You know, given your connection to his husband’s death and all. His husband’s not been buried a solid month, and he’s already spreading his legs for another man—and not just any man.”
“He’s not spreading his legs for anyone.” The second the words were out, I wanted to take them back. Hopefully, Nik, being as dense as he was, wouldn’t catch my meaning.
“What’d you mean? You just said you had sex, so if he’s not spreading his legs, then that means that…” His speech slowed down, and his eyes grew wider as realization dawned on him. “Oh fuck.”
“You say anything to anyone, Nik, and I swear—”
“I won’t.” He rolled his eyes but then eyed me up and down. “Don’t know what you’re getting all bent out of shape for. Is there any shame in bottoming?”
“I just don’t want to talk to you about my sex life.”
“Why not? It might do you some good rather than that solo caveman bullshit you always have going on, like the rest of us are the enemy and only you are good enough to serve Maxim.”
Nik’s words hit harder than any punch I’d thrown earlier. For a second, I stared at him through the mirror, my pulse thudding slow and heavy in my ears. It wasn’t what he said but rather the way he said it. Casual. Like the thought had been sitting there for a while.
“The enemy?” I repeated, quieter now. “That’s how you think I see you?”
Nik huffed out a breath, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. He scratched the back of his neck again, visibly less relaxed than he’d been a moment ago. “What the hell are we supposed to think, Sergei?”
That wasn’t the answer I expected. I wanted him to deny it. To say his words were meaningless and were spoken in the heat of the moment.
“I never once thought I was better than any of you.”
Nik’s brows lifted, like he didn’t quite believe that.
“I’ve been head of security for Maxim for years,” I continued, my voice tightening.
“Do you understand what that actually means? The pressure that comes with that position? If anyone here fucks up,” I went on, tapping a finger against my chest, “it’s not just their mistake.
It becomes mine. Every gap, every oversight, every blind spot—I’m expected to catch it before it becomes a problem. That’s the job.”
“And you think that’s normal?” Nik shot back, sharper now. “You think one man can catch everything?”
“That’s what I’m paid to do.”
“No.” He shook his head, stepping closer. “That’s what you decided to do. There’s a difference.”
My jaw clenched. “You don’t get it.”
“No, I do,” he said, quieter but no less firm. “You’ve been carrying this shit for so long you don’t know how to let others shoulder the burden.”
I scoffed, pushing off the sink. “Easy for you to say when you’re not the one Maxim looks at when something goes wrong.”
Nik’s expression hardened. “And you think we don’t feel that too? You think we don’t take pride in our work? That we don’t want to pull our own weight?”
“That’s not what I said.”
“It’s how it comes across,” he countered. “You swoop in, fix everything before it blows up, and then act surprised when the rest of us stop trying to get ahead of it.”
I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. Because there was truth in that.
Nik dragged a hand down his face and sighed.
“All I’m saying is, you’re not a damn machine, Sergei.
You’ve got a life outside of Maxim,” he said, his voice softer now.
“Or you would, if you actually let the rest of us carry our share instead of acting like the whole operation’s going to collapse the second you look away. ”
Silence stretched between us, thick and uncomfortable because I didn’t have an answer for that either. I dragged a hand through my hair, pacing once before stopping in front of him again.
“It’s not that simple, Nik. You don’t just…wake up one day and decide to stop doing something you’ve been doing for a decade.”
“No,” he agreed. “But you can start by not acting like the rest of us are liabilities. We’re on the same side, man.
You don’t have to carry everything alone.
I know I joke about this whole thing with Leo, but seriously, if you wanna talk, then talk to me about it.
I have Jess and Darius, whom I can talk to about anything. Who do you talk to?”
I held his gaze, searching for anything in his expression that would tell me he was fucking around like normal.
I wasn’t used to Nik being this serious about anything.
He was the fun, relaxed one. I always saw him like a little brother I had to keep an eye on, but except for that one mishap with Wren, he’d been solid in his work. I’d never found fault in him.
“I—can’t.”
“Then fuck you, man.” Nik pushed off the wall, sounding genuinely offended as he yanked open the door. I grabbed his shoulder before he could walk out on me because if he left this way, he might never make this offer again.
“It’s not that I don’t want to talk to you about Leo,” I said slowly. “But I can’t because I don’t even fully understand what I feel or what’s happening between us. If—when I can, I’ll remember your offer.”
The tension in Nik’s shoulders relaxed, and he sighed. “Alright, I won’t push anymore, but we’d best be heading out.”