Chapter 46
That afternoon at the Ministry
Matty took a deep breath. Before moving, he considered his options.
He could take Mum somewhere else, but where was tricky.
A cafe wouldn’t have nearly enough privacy, even with charms. Certainly not Urania’s Apples or his flat.
He didn’t want Mum either place. That left his office, really, unless he offered to go to London.
But at this time of day, Portal Square was horribly busy.
There’d be a wait, and more chances for gossip. His office it was.
Then he squared his shoulders and went downstairs. The Guard on duty looked up, simultaneously relieved and uncertain. “Evening, Mum. I wasn’t expecting you, thought I’d be seeing you Thursday. Is something the matter at home?”
It put her just enough off guard to stand, peer at him, and then nearly sit down again.
Matty went on without giving her a chance to say much.
“Why don’t we go up to my office? I can make you a cuppa.
The lift’s this way.” Making her climb to the third floor wouldn’t do any good, and the lift was probably fewer people, anyway.
“Thanks, Walters.” That was to the Guard.
He managed to get his mother to the lift and toward his office without too much trouble. Harlow poked her head out of the office, saying, “Need something? I heard the lift.” Of course, that would have been unusual at this time of day, without the sounds of people going to it from this floor.
“My mother came round. Mum, this is Miss Harlow, secretary for the department. Miss Harlow, my mother, Lily Lawson.” Mum bobbed her head. “I was just going to make a cuppa, unless there’s still hot water?”
“There is. Just enough for two cups. I’ll bring it along.” Matty was grateful for that. By the time he got Mum settled in his guest chair, Harlow had reappeared with a small tray, two mugs, and two small biscuits.
“I’ll be in my office for a little longer, finishing up the records.
” She was behind Mum now, and she gave Matty a slight twitch of her shoulder.
She was not remotely behind. He’d eat his satchel if she were, but having someone else about would be a reassurance.
“Half an hour, maybe a bit more.” Until he was done, that was the strong implication, and Matty appreciated it no end.
“I’ll let you know when we’re on the way out, then, if you’d let the cleaners know?
” Matty suggested. Harlow nodded and went out, pulling the door closed behind her.
Matty took a moment for the privacy charms. He wasn’t as smooth at it as Claudio was, but they were down near the end of an empty hallway.
And probably Mum wouldn’t be shouty, she was in public.
Enough in public. He set a mug in front of her, a dish for the tea dregs, and then settled into his own chair.
“So, why are you here, Mum? I said I’d come so we could talk things out on Thursday. ”
“You know why.” She sounded so incredibly plaintive.
The thing was, it wasn’t working on Matty.
Before the war, it would have. But Germany had hardened him, seeing people try to manipulate others emotionally, despite having done horrible things.
And then the conversations with Claudio and Orion and Hypatia and especially Cammie had made him able to get a little distance.
None of them favoured emotional manipulation— well, Claudio and Orion came from the sorts of families that wouldn’t.
But Cammie had nil patience for it. She said it was always sloppy.
That was where people slipped up. And where people hurt each other.
She’d talked about her approach as ruthless kindness, doing the necessary thing without additional hurt, but getting it done so it didn’t linger and drag everything around it down.
Matty leaned back slightly. He was doing his best to seem unruffled.
Part of that was because it would put Mum off-balance.
Part of it was that, actually, he was not as bothered as he probably ought to be.
He didn’t want to hurt her. But he didn’t want her to hurt him, and she hadn’t been giving that a lot of attention since he came back to Albion.
He certainly didn’t have to make it easy for her. He just waited.
Mum peered at him. “I don’t know who you think you are now. Behaving like this. We raised you better than that.” She was at least skirting the nastier things she might have said. “Your dad can’t show his face.”
“Dad,” Matty said evenly, “wrote me an entirely pleasant note over his lunch break. Didn’t touch on the complicated bits, just sending a comment about something in the paper I’d like to read.
Which I did and wrote back about.” He had a decent idea of what his dad probably thought, but Dad was at least being an adult about it.
“Come on, Mum. It’s been a long day. I had other plans for the evening, and if you’re going to yell at me, I’d rather do it Thursday. ”
She sniffed loudly, then rummaged in her purse for a large handkerchief, burying her face in it.
Matty made himself stay quiet and settled.
When she didn’t look up again, he said, still holding his voice level and calm, “I’d apologise for not telling you, but I think we both know it wouldn’t have gone well if I had.
I didn’t expect him to be as public as he was Sunday, but he checked beforehand, and I’m glad he was.
He’s doing something tremendously challenging, and giving it his best, with an eye to helping a lot of people, including you and Dad. I’ll not get in the way of that.”
“But you— we raised you better than that. Have you...”
“Did you ever know me to date a woman?” Matty said, sparing both of them any chance of her coming up with some insulting term. It took her aback.
“Florrie...” Her voice trailed off.
“That was Don. Briefly. He didn’t stick with her either.
I wish her well, but you’ve got no chance of my coming back to London to live, whatever else happens.
” That much, he was going to be clear about.
“London, my preferences could get me in gaol. I’m right at the average age for it, last time I did the maths. ”
He spread his hands. “I’m the son you have.
You can decide what to do about it. What you choose will matter in how often you see me, or where.
I’m not going to be difficult about it on the street or anything like that.
I’ve been keeping who I fancy from you since I was fourteen.
If you’d not found out now, probably could have done it the rest of my life.
” If he hadn’t actually gone and fallen for someone he wanted to make a life with, whatever that actually looked like.
Mum sniffled once more, then put the handkerchief in her lap, her hands a little shaky. “Where did you, how— I don’t even know what I’m asking.”
“How about I tell you what I’d tell you if it was the sort of girl you’d rather?
” Matty went on without waiting for an answer.
“We met because Claudio was the representative for the Penelopes at one of my weekly meetings. The one I’ve been running.
I had—” He had to think about how to put this.
“I had a bad moment after one of them. He made sure I was all right enough after. Checked in a couple of days later. He noticed. That was the thing. Someone needing a hand.”
“And he’s— I mean. Council.” There was a note of something like awe in her voice.
The thing was, the awe wasn’t wrong. For all Claudio hadn’t told details— anyone yet, except maybe a bit to Gabe earlier today— Matty understood the awe.
Something tremendous had happened during his Challenge, something that had loosened over-tightened bands around his heart and his magic and his sense of self.
And then there was the political power and influence that came with the Council, hard to measure but always right there.
“He is, yes. Raised to it, and that’s all sorts of complicated, but he cares about doing the thing right.
He has ideas for making things better. For folks in all sorts of places, including London.
” They’d touched on that much, in the time they’d had, though Claudio had noted it was going to take getting others on the Council to agree, and that was going to be a project and a half.
“And you and he...” Mum hesitated. She certainly was not the kind to get into crude details.
Matty, for his part, had quite pleasant and recent memories of various bits of energetic and vigorous buggery he would have to avoid mentioning or showing.
Here, he could be grateful that he was talking to his own mum and not to Claudio’s mother.
She would likely have figured out a fair bit of it from three expressions and an angle of his foot. Probably.
“We enjoy our time together in a range of ways. Normally, we’d be at a pub by now.
Bohort, watching it. His friends get up pickup games sometimes.
When things settle down, they’ll have me play.
He’s got a regular poker game. I might get dealt in next time.
” Matty shrugged. “Fair bit of reading and talking through matters at work. He knows a lot of things I don’t, or from a different angle. I like that.”
“And your flat.” Her eyes narrowed.
Matty spread his hands, this time willing to be a bit conciliatory.
“We’re in no rush to do anything in particular.
My lease runs through the end of December, as it stands.
” That seemed about right to figure out what was next, whatever that looked like, honestly.
“I’ve met his son, quite enjoy listening to him talk about what he’s learning.
I’ll meet his daughter sometime. His ex-wife’s fine with it.
We just hadn’t found a good time that wouldn’t interfere with other plans before now.
But she knows about me. She has since the first bits of gossip came out. ”
Mum sighed. “You’re not going to do the decent thing, are you?”