21. Kane
Chapter twenty-one
Kane
L iz’s name flashes on the display, bringing a smile to my face as I hit accept . “Hey sis. How are my little nephews doing?”
Charlie and Henry are two and four, and after they had to move to Arizona for my brother-in-law’s job I haven’t seen much of them.
Had they stayed in Utah I might not have taken a job in Katah Vista, even if it was the right career move.
Them being gone was just one more reason for me to try something new, too.
“They’re doing great. They miss their uncle.”
“I miss them. So, are you boiling in the desert sun?” My sister is neither a tomboy nor an outdoor lover, but with two little boys she can’t escape playtime outside. I never get tired of teasing her about that.
“I actually took them to an indoor pool the other day, thank you very much. ”
“It’s August for you too, right? You didn’t go through some sort of time portal or something when you crossed the border, because if I remember correctly, August is summer. No indoor pools allowed.”
“When it’s seventy-five degrees indoors and well over a hundred outdoors, you’d stay inside, too. Besides, you’ll probably get snow in the next few weeks, and when you do, you’ll be begging to come down here and borrow my sunshine.”
I roll my eyes even though she’s right. “I just might take you up on that. So, have you met any more people down there?”
“I signed Henry up for preschool, so I’m sure I’ll meet some other moms soon. What about you?”
A smile tugs at my mouth as I recall the concert a few nights back.
Not only did I meet some really nice guys, and a girl, they’ve already invited me to their business owner’s brunch this weekend.
Even though I’m not technically a business owner, being in charge of the bike park must count in their eyes.
“Actually, yes. There’s a group of guys here that seem pretty nice, and they like biking. Or they’re willing to try, anyway.”
“Sounds like you found your people.” I hear the joy in Liz’s voice, and I have to swallow down the lump it makes in my throat.
Only Liz knows the extent of my loneliness in Utah, and how I struggled to find people there.
I clung to Brian pretty hard after our parents died in a car wreck, and my friendships suffered because of it.
It didn’t help that I buried myself in work, establishing myself as the person Jackson could rely on.
It was amazing for my career but the kiss of death for my social life.
By the time I picked my head up from the bike trail and realized Brian was cheating on me, most of my friends had moved away or moved on. So, I did what was familiar. More work.
Looking back, I can’t say I regret anything. Those choices paved the way for this job, and I’m grateful to have it. But I’ve also learned that no matter how much I love my job I have to balance living with working, and finding people I can relate to is a great start.
“It’s early still, but yeah. I can see myself being happy here.”
“So, you’ve met some guys. Any that might be boyfriend material?” The silence tells me she’s holding her breath, waiting for my response.
I should’ve been expecting this question. Liz has been wanting me to get back out there for months, not because she thinks I need a man but because she doesn’t want me to be afraid of them. I sort of figured she’d give me more time to get settled before bringing guys up, though.
Guys . It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell her yes, I’ve met some. But I can’t get the words out.
“You have met someone.” I hear the sly smile in her voice.
“I didn’t say that.”
“Your silence says it all.”
“Hardly,” I mutter under my breath as my mind wanders to two sexy faces.
“What was that?” I swear the woman has bionic ears. “You know I’ll drive to Katah Vista so you can tell me in person if you don’t tell me now. Who is he?”
I puff out my cheeks and exhale slowly, stalling to brace for her reaction. “Remember how I hooked up with a guy right before I got this job offer?”
“Omigosh. The sandy-haired one that was super-hot without any ego?”
“That’s the one. Blake.” At least she recalled the lack of ego detail. It’ll make him sound better when she hears the full story.
“You hooked up with him again?” Her voice rises several octaves as her excitement mounts.
“Turns out he lives here. And works at the mountain. He was in Utah to meet with Jackson, and I missed that meeting since I was on my way back from visiting you. I just happened to run into him that night and, well, the rest you know.”
“Holy wow! So, you reconnected? That’s amazing. I remember you telling me what a good guy he is, sort of like that one you met right after you broke up with Brian. What was his name? Jason? Josh? Something with a J.”
“Jace. Yeah. So, funny story. Jace lives here, too.” My palms are suddenly sweaty, and I trap the phone between my ear and my shoulder so I can wipe them on my shorts.
“Get out! I thought he traveled for his job or something.”
“He does. Or did. Now, he lives here. With Blake. They’re roommates.” I swear my heart is about to beat out of my chest. I’ve never felt so anxious in my life. Not even the first time I slept with both the guys. That was a breeze compared to this.
“Oh crap.” Liz sucks in a breath. “What are the odds the only two men you’ve had an interest in since Brian are roommates? Do they know you hooked up with both of them?”
“Yeah… They know.”
“Is that awkward?” Her voice is tinged with concern.
“Not as awkward as you’d think.”
“So, wait. Which one did you reconnect with?”
I wring my hands together, gathering courage. “Both,” I squeak.
The line goes dead silent.
“Oh honey, oh no. You can’t do that. They live together, it’s going to come out that you’ve been with them both. Again. You don’t want to be stuck in the middle of two friends.”
“I’m not going behind anyone’s back.”
More silence. I don’t know whether to be frustrated or relieved that I can’t see her face to know what she’s thinking.
“They know about each other? ”
“Intimately.” A pan clatters in the background, and I have to cover my mouth with my hand to stop the laugh from escaping. Poor Liz. She probably thought I couldn’t shock her any worse than I did with the pink hair.
“I’m sorry, what?”
“We sort of have an arrangement.”
“ We? As in the three of you?”
“Yep.” I press my lips together and wait for her reaction.
“Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”
“What do you think I’m saying?” It’s not really fair, but I want her to say it instead of me.
“Don’t play dumb. You’re the meat in between their bread?”
Well, I prefer to think of myself as the pin cushion that they're poking holes into with their… Okay, maybe her analogy is better.
“Ugh. Just say threesome. That’s way less creepy.”
“Three…,” she trails off, and I get a sudden image of her blinking in rapid succession as she turns the word over in her head. “Hold up, you said arrangement. Does that mean this is a regular thing?”
“Pretty regular.”
“Oh my gosh, you have to stop right now.”
“Why?” It comes out harsher than intended, but having her tell me no raises my hackles. “There’s nothing wrong with three people having consensual sex.”
“There is when you can’t separate sex from feelings,” she retorts.
“It already happened with these guys once, didn’t it?
You thought about them long after they were gone, and that was after one night.
What happens after three nights? Or three months?
You’ll be half in love with them if you aren’t already. ”
Dammit, why do I tell her everything ?
“They made a lasting impression, I’ll give you that. But just because it was memorable doesn’t mean I pined away for either of them after one night.”
“It’s not one night anymore. And it’s not one guy anymore. You’re going to fall for one of them and someone will get hurt.”
She makes a good point—one I’ve already thought of since both Blake and Jace are guys I could see myself falling for.
And yeah, maybe there’s a tiny emotional component involved in the sense that the guys are so considerate when we’re all together, making me feel genuinely cared for.
Cherished almost. Plus, they’re just as concerned for my well-being and reputation as I am, going to great lengths to portray me as a friend and nothing more.
And despite our unconventional arrangement there isn’t any jealousy or awkwardness between us when Blake and I tell Jace about or day, or when Jace rubbed my leg driving home while Blake sat in the back seat after the concert.
All in all, they’re both great guys, and hanging out with them feels natural.
But none of that inherently means I’ve got… Oh shit .
“Tell me you haven’t fallen for both of them,” Liz says softly.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” I protest despite a nagging fear I’ve done just that.
Jace’s dark intensity and Blake’s easygoing charm may speak to me in different ways, but I crave both, and I don’t want to give up either.
“We’re all just having fun. Three single people making the most of not being tied down. ”
“I’m serious, Kane. I worry about you. The way you were after Brian… He broke your heart. I don’t want to see you go through that again.”
“Brian’s secrets broke my heart. Blake and Jace and I don’t have any secrets.”
I sign off by telling Liz I’ve got everything under control, but I can’t help wondering—is that still true if I want to be with them in and out of the bedroom?