15. AURORA
“RORY!”
The weight on my chest vanishes.
There’s smashing and screaming.
Move, Rory. Hide. This is your chance.
I try to roll over to my knees but my body won’t respond. Instead I let my head loll to one side, and that’s when I see a blur of Digger gray.
A whirlwind of violence that throws the No-men aside like they’re rag dolls. Taliesin moves with a brutal, efficient speed that makes my ballet look like a slow-motion dream.
Beside him, Clay is bringing a heavy metal pipe down on all the red scrubs Taliesin throws his way.
Two more figures blur into the space behind them. I hear Keisha’s manic laugh.
Fuck, get it together.
My hands are shaking so violently they hardly work, but I manage to drag myself further from the fighting.
And then my heart does its fucking thing.
Wump-ppp.
Taliesin grabs the man with the twisted nose by the throat, “I told you,” he growls, slamming the man into the wall, “she is under my protection.”
Another no-man screams, and I see Alanna and Keisha taking turns to kick him.
“Can you walk?” Taliesin demands, his eyes furious and chest heaving.
I can’t speak. If I try to utter a word, I know I’ll start crying, and I refuse to give these bastards that satisfaction.
As I try to stand, my knees give way. Taliesin hauls me to my feet, then circles his arm around my waist to keep me upright. “Touch her again, and I’ll stop the heat and water to this entire pitiful wing. Fuck, I’ll probably just do it anyway.”
Clay stands guard. “We need to move, Tally. Tindall will be coming back.”
“Fuck that cunt,” Taliesin grunts, but at the same time he gets us moving, whistling to the twins to follow.
The descent back into the heat of the Digger block is a blur. Taliesin half-carries, half-drags me through the dark corridors.
As soon as we reach the cell, the adrenaline evaporates, leaving nothing but pain and sadness behind. I stumble into my cage and vomit until my ribs ache.
After a minute, a hand comes and touches the back of my head.
Taliesin gently gathers the tangled mess of my hair, holding it back from my face as his other arm circles my waist to keep me from face-planting into my own mess.
Once the retching finally subsides, Taliesin presses a cold, wet washcloth into my hand.
“Thank you,” I whisper. He knows I’m thanking him for more than a piece of damp fabric. I look up, focusing on my cellmate. My captor and my only anchor.
He looks away, then mumbles quietly. “Did they…are you…fuck.”
“I wasn’t raped, if that’s what you’re asking.”
A shudder runs through his body. “Yeah, fuck. Good. So are you doing OK?”
Am I doing OK? The question is so absurd it almost makes me laugh, but my throat is too raw. “I’ll be doing great once I kill the warden,” I mutter.
Taliesin’s face darkens. “Yeah, OK. That seems valid. The fucker has it coming to him.”
I lean back and close my eyes again. “How did you know where to find me?”
“One of Dot’s crew. Some new guard let it slip.”
Thank Gods.
Fuck, I feel awful. “You don’t have any more of those mushrooms by any chance? I could do with escaping reality right now.”
“Sorry, Princess. You’ll have to wait until the next harvest, it will be a couple of weeks.”
“A couple of weeks, Godsdammit,” I repeat with a sigh, then look up at the ceiling. “You know, I just don’t get it, I held my own against Hector. He’s twice the size of those no-men, and I beat him. Why was I so weak today?”
Taliesin’s silence stretches out before he finally lets out a long breath. “You weren’t weak, Aurora. You were outnumbered.” He pauses, then adds, “And the fight with Hector… it wasn’t exactly what it looked like. I told him to throw it.”
I freeze. “You what?”
“I couldn’t have him actually hurt you, so I made sure he took the dive.” Taliesin is not looking at me, which is a good thing, because he’d see how pissed, and confusingly touched, I am.
Shit.
“So I’m still a fucking weakling,” I whisper, the memory of those groping hands echoing across my skin. “Just a liability.”
I keep my eyes clamped shut, but it doesn’t help. The darkness behind my lids doesn’t hide a replay of every terrible moment.
Don’t shatter, do not break.
There is no-man blood beneath my fingernails. My skin feels like it’s crawling, a million tiny insects under the surface trying to escape the memory of those hands. I want to scrub myself raw until there’s nothing left of Aurora Drakeward but bone. All the nerves, all the feelings washed away.
Taliesin helps me up, then he sits beside me, the cot springs creaking under his weight. “I’m sorry you had to go through that,” he says eventually. “I have very little power when it comes to Voss, and that man is a predator. He plays with his toys until they break, just to see what’s inside.”
My fingers curl into the thin mattress, but Taliesin’s body next to mine is a comfort. He’s the only man in this hellhole that I can trust—and that scares the crap out of me. I know nothing about him.
Who the fuck is Taliesin Bevan anyway?
“Why are you in here, Taliesin?” I whisper, the question slipping out before I can pull it back. “Or is asking you going against some prison code I don’t know about?”
“Pretty much.”
Leaning myself back against the wall, I turn to look at him, really look at him. His knuckles are split and raw from what he did in the gym. He’s the most violent man I’ve ever known, but right now, he’s the only thing that feels safe.
“So you’re not going to tell me how you ended up in Quo?”
His gaze fixes on the shadows in the corner. For a moment, I think he’s going to snap at me, tell me to shut up and sleep. Instead, he lets out a long breath.
“I’m from Ashgrave,” he begins. “My mom runs a free health clinic in the slums. My cousin, Chloe, worked there with her. She was barely nineteen. Sweet, quiet girl. Apart from her laugh. She fucking snorted like a pig when she laughed.”
He stops, his hands clenching into fists on his knees.
“The Mayor of Ashgrave is a low-level Elite, but his son never leveled up beyond Ordinarii. I think the chip on his shoulder made him want to display power in any way he could. He’s a fucking bully.
One night he cornered Chloe on the way home from work.
He… he did things to her. Brutal things.
And because he was who he was, the police didn’t even file a report. They called it a ‘misunderstanding.’”
My heart aches. I know that story. Different names, different cities, but the same ending.
“Chloe couldn’t live with it, Rory,” Taliesin continues.
“She killed herself three days later. Left a note telling us what happened, and saying sorry for being weak. So, I went to find him. I didn’t use a knife.
I used my bare hands. I wanted him to feel every bit of the terror she felt.
I nearly killed him. The only reason I didn’t is because some guards pulled me off. ”
He looks at me then, and the raw vulnerability in his golden eyes makes my breath hitch.
“When I got sent to Quo, the block was run by a guy named Zed. He was just a regular gang banger but had fought his way to the top. He also didn’t care about anyone.
Especially the female Diggers. I realized then that if I wanted to keep people like Chloe safe—I had to become the monster that kept the other predators away. ”
He reaches out, gently brushes a stray hair from my forehead. His touch is so light, so heartbreakingly sweet, it makes my eyes sting.
“I’m sorry I didn’t get to the gym faster,” he says softly. “I should have known Voss would play dirty.”
In the slump of his shoulders, I see a man who carries the weight of everyone’s safety on his back.
I reach out and cover his hand with mine.
“But you did get there in time. You saved me, Taliesin,” I whisper.
“You did.” I look up at him, the last of my pride finally crumbling.
“Cosmo’s never coming for me. The warden told me he’s in trouble.
I don’t have anyone outside of here. I only have you. ”
Tally moves. He doesn’t ask for permission; he simply gathers me into his arms, pulling me against his chest. “I’m so fucking sorry,” he whispers.
The words are so faint I only catch them because his lips are pressed against the damp hair at my temple.
“If there was any way… anything I could do to turn back time for you… I’d do it, Rory,” he continues.
“You shouldn’t have to live with the memory of those hands on you. ”
He’s holding me with such fierce, desperate strength that it’s impossible for me to turn around and see his face. Maybe that’s how he wants it.
He doesn’t want me to see how much he cares.
“This pit is dark and lifeless.” His words breathe against my neck. “You’re the only thing that shines. And I nearly let them break you.”
For the first time since we left the gym, the shivering in my body dies down. His arms are a cage that feels like freedom.
Suddenly, abruptly, he pulls back, placing me on the cot and jumping to his feet. “If you’re going to survive,” he growls. “I think it’s time you carried a shiv.”
I’m thrown by the change of topic, but also slightly grateful, though I’m not ready to examine why. “Sounds good.”
He gives me a half-smile. “So, if I get you one, will you be a good girl and not stab me with it?”
I try to give a sarcastic sneer, but it hurts my face. “Well, I don’t like to make promises that I can’t be sure to keep.”
Taliesin’s laughter startles me. “Then I’d better try not to get on your bad side again,” he says. “Don’t want to become a victim of the Ballerina Butcher.”
“Yeah, she’s got a real mean streak and a hell of a kick, though…” I prod my aching skull. “She prefers bouquets for her performances, not blows.”
Taliesin leans against the cage door, and a smile plays over my lips. “I’ll remember that. Roses it is.”
He disappears out of the room and I lie back and close my eyes.
And imagine Taliesin Bevan holding a bunch of flowers. Giving them to me.
Fuck. What is wrong with me?
The fact that he’s more present in my head than the trauma?
I’m sure a therapist would have a lot to say about that.
But, fuck it.
What’s one more thing to suppress?