Chapter 23AsherTheo
Asher
It was one of those days when the summer heat created a hazy feeling in the atmosphere, and the sky was white.
The bright sun reflected off the cars parked along Main Street, making it hard to see.
It wasn’t muggy, but oppressive. The heavy heat made it hard to move.
I wanted to sit down in an air-conditioned restaurant and have a cold drink.
Which was precisely what Theo and I were doing.
We’d just picked up some new mouthguards after running a few errands for Maria, and the heat was unbearable. Neither of us wanted to get back in the car just yet, so we decided to stop at a restaurant first to relax.
We arrived at a little hole-in-the-wall diner. The cool air hit me like a physical force, making me momentarily lightheaded due to the drastic temperature change.
Still, it felt nice to be out of the heat.
The floor was checkered, and the booths had that classic bright red diner color. It was perfect for a thirty-minute chill.
The waitress, a woman in her sixties, arrived wearing a bright teal top, a checkerboard apron over it, and jet-black hair piled high on her head. She wore a nametag that read Marge .
“What’ll it be, fellas?”
I loved ladies like that. They were all over New Rochelle—Tammy Faye-level mascara, hair that looked like it had been dyed four million times, and a no-bullshit attitude.
Theo spoke first, “I’ll have a root beer float. I haven’t had one of those in… ever! I’ve never had a root beer float! Holy shit, how can I have never had one of those before?”
“They’re not much of a thing these days,” I replied.
Theo did the same knocking on the table thing that his dad did, and I swear my eyes became heart-shaped. “Today’s the day. I’m getting a fuckin’ root beer float.”
Marge rolled her eyes. “I’ll let the marching band in the back know so they can come out and play when you take your first sip.” Then, she turned to me and asked, “And you, baby? What’ll it be?”
“Just a Diet Coke, thank you.”
“Coming up.” She walked away, and I looked at Theo. He had a big smile that made me want to crawl into his booth and squeeze him. He was genuinely excited for his root beer float, and it was the cutest thing I’d ever seen.
Note to self: Get root beer and ice cream if he likes it.
I inched my leg closer to Theo’s so I could rub against him. Some kind of physical contact was necessary for the level of cuteness he emanated. He smiled when our legs connected, looking at me with a longing stare.
It was so hard to control myself in these situations. We’d said we didn’t want to be out just yet, but I still couldn’t believe that Theo, the guy I’d pined after for so long, was mine. It didn’t feel real. It made it hard to keep my hands off him.
My hands were under the table, and Theo reached across to hold them.
A warm feeling washed over me as we sat there, holding each other’s hands.
It was perfect. My heart rate accelerated just watching him look at me like that.
Like I mattered. Theo had always been my object of obsession, and the little bro-hugs and shoulder rubs were moments I cherished.
But those were a thing of the past, now that we were a couple.
Theo didn’t just touch me anymore; he caressed me.
He held me. It was wonderful. I took a deep breath, letting that lovely feeling fill me up.
My phone buzzed, a slight vibration tingling my leg, but I ignored it.
We’re having a moment, damnit!
Then, it happened again. Then again. And again. What the hell is going on?
“Jesus, my phone is blowing up,” Theo said.
Really? His too? “So is mine, actually. That’s weird.”
Theo reached into his pocket to check his phone, so I followed suit. It could be his mom or someone from his family texting us. If that were the case, we’d best look at the messages, or we might forget something that Maria needed.
I looked at my phone, and the first thing I saw was about seven missed messages from Quincy. I opened them up, and what I saw made the hair on my neck stand. At first, I thought it was a porn clip, but then I realized it was a photo of…
Oh no.
It was me. It was a picture of my back, but my face was turned to the side, clearly visible to the camera, and it looked like I was moaning. Theo was on his knees with his face pressed against my ass. We were in the locker room shower.
What? Is that us? What in the ever-loving fuck? !
I quickly responded to Quincy:
Me: How did you get that?
Quincy: You and Theo are together?
Me: HOW DID YOU GET THAT?
Quincy: Dude, the whole team has it. Someone snapped this to everyone in the middle of the night. I woke up to it this morning.
The whole team?
I looked up at Theo to find him staring at his phone, his face completely white.
“Theo…”
The fear in his eyes when his gaze met mine made it hard to breathe. “Are you seeing it?” he asked.
“I saw the picture. Quincy said the team saw it, but that’s not true. That can’t be true!”
Theo dropped his phone on the table, his head falling into his hands. Then, he slammed his fist against the table and hollered, “Fucker! Whoever did this sent it to everyone. Everyone, Asher. The whole fucking team is snapping me. Snapping this picture!”
He turned his phone toward me, his hand trembling as the image of him and me together stared back at me, causing a burning sensation in my eyes.
I looked back at Theo and choked. He was so enraged. His face quaked with fury as his cheeks became dark red. I don’t know why, but I blamed myself. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” I said it repeatedly. It was as if my brain had snapped, and it was all I could think to say.
My phone buzzed again, and I reached for it with shaking hands.
No.
Coach Wilson: I need to speak with you as soon as possible, preferably in person. Please meet me at the rink tomorrow at noon.
Time stopped. My body, once boiling from the summer heat, became freezing. I broke out in a cold sweat, tears welling at the base of my eyes.
He knows. He has to know.
It was all too coincidental. Why would Coach be texting us at that exact moment? He had to have seen the picture.
I looked up at Theo to find him staring at his phone too. His eyes met mine, and he said, “Coach wants to talk to me.”
I swallowed the lump in my throat and whispered, “Me too.”
Theo scrubbed his hands over his face before saying, “They sent it to the Coach. Fuck. Oh, my God, I can’t believe this.”
Theo looked broken. The red color of his rage was gone, and he looked sallow. He slowly rested his head on the table and covered it with his hands. That’s when I heard him whimper. Theo was crying. “Jesus fucking Christ. How can this be happening?”
My Theo is crying. Theo was the tough one—the one who let everything roll off his back, and he was crying. Panic took over. I started rubbing the heels of my hand against my eyes because I thought I might have a migraine. My head throbbed as my thoughts spiraled.
They all have the picture. They all know. Everyone knows.
My vision blurred. The jubilation from the night before, that wonderful feeling knowing our dreams were almost within reach, vanished.
It’s over. Coach will kick us off the team. Everyone knows.
Everyone. Knows.
They’d taken it all away from me. They stole my dreams. My hockey career was over. Theo would leave me.
They took away my power to come out on my own terms. My body was exposed. The love I felt for Theo was the object of derision, being passed around by a bunch of assholes on Snapchat like it was a fucking joke.
It came on fast. I rose to my feet and darted to the bathroom.
I felt so violated. My sweetie was in despair.
Someone did this to us, intentionally. It was all too much.
I crashed through the bathroom door and didn’t even make it to the stall.
Everything I’d eaten that day came back up, and it wasn’t stopping.
I was on all fours in the middle of the bathroom floor, vomiting.
The door swung open. “Asher! Baby!”
Theo came and rubbed my back. I was heaving and sobbing at the same time. There was nothing in me, but I kept throwing up—the horrible retching sound echoing all around us.
The door swung open again. “Jesus! Is he okay? Should we call an ambulance or something?”
It was a male voice. Maybe the manager? I didn’t fucking know. I didn’t know anything except that my life was over.
“No, we’re okay, I’ve got him,” Theo replied. He continued rubbing my back as he whispered, “Baby, breathe. You have to breathe.” Despite his soothing touch and soft voice, my body still shook. Someone did this to us. Who could be so fucking vile and hateful to do something so—
Then it hit me.
I knew exactly who did it.
Mason .
Theo
I kept looking at Asher as I drove us home because I was so worried.
Part of me wanted to take him to see a doctor because I was almost positive he was having a breakdown.
He rested his head in his hand, covering his eyes, but the tears continued rolling down his cheeks.
Every few seconds, he’d release a sob that made me want to pull over and wrap him in my arms.
“I know who did it,” he croaked out.
I nearly slammed my foot on the brake. He does? “Who? How do you know?” I asked.
Asher lowered his hand, shaking his head with a bitter look on his face that made my gut hurt. “Mason did it. I know it.”
Honestly, it made sense. The whole team knew Mason was jealous of Asher, but I never thought someone would do that to his teammate.
I’d always had my teammates’ backs—except for Davis, because I was in love with Asher and didn’t know it.
Okay, so jealousy makes us do some fucked up things.
Still, I’d never try to ruin a teammate’s life.
“He’ll get his,” I assured Asher.
He let out a spiteful laugh, then started bellowing, “No, he won’t.
None of those guys gets theirs. I’ve spent my whole fucking life dealing with those assholes, and they never get what they deserve.
” Asher’s breathing became erratic, his clenched fists shaking as he continued to speak.
“I hate them. I hate them, Theo. I don’t deserve this.
We don’t deserve this. We deserve to be happy!
Why can’t they just let us be fucking happy? ”
He was screaming, sobbing, and shaking while he let it all out. He was falling apart, and I needed to do something. I pulled the car over and pulled him into my arms. “Baby. We are happy. Aren’t we?”
Asher stilled, then looked up at me with a questioning look in his eyes. “Of course, I’m happy with you. But…”
“But what?” I asked. “Think about it. Have you ever been happier?”
The hurt in Asher’s eyes diminished, and his brow smoothed out. “No. This is the happiest I’ve ever been.”
This is good. I’m snapping him out of it. “I’ve never been happier, too. No matter what happens with hockey, we, ” I motioned between the two of us to drive the point home, “will be happy.
“I’m so sorry, Theo. You’re right. I just feel so stupid, you know?”
“I mean, same, babe, but we’ll survive. I’m not ashamed of being with you. We did a dumb thing, but we didn’t hurt anyone. We didn’t drink ten beers, then get into a car accident. We got a little carried away and sucked each other off in a locker room. It ain’t the first time that’s ever happened.”
Asher choked out a laugh. “I guess you’re right. It’s just so…”
“Tell me, baby.”
Asher looked at me, then said, “I wanted to come out on my own terms. Mason took that from me.”
Asher rested his head against my chest, his hands clutching my shoulder.
I didn’t care what people thought about me.
Sure, I was absolutely enraged that someone did this to us, but I didn’t spend my whole life being conditioned to believe I was wrong.
Asher had. His mother and those awful men she kept around screwed my baby up.
I couldn’t imagine how vulnerable he felt.
“I’m scared, Theo. ”
I pulled him closer and kissed the top of his head. “No matter what, you’ve got me. We’ve got each other. Hockey is great, but my love for you surpasses any dreams I had about hockey. We’re going to get through this together, Asher. You’re not alone anymore.”
He looked up at me and asked, “Are you sure? This isn’t too much for you?”
I pulled Asher as close as possible and kissed the top of his head. “Losing you would be too much for me. This is a blip in time. It’ll pass, but my love for you is way stronger than this.”
I felt the tension in his body release when I said that. Good, he’s calming down. He had every right to be furious, but we couldn’t let the actions of some asshole like Mason diminish the love we felt for one another. That’s how those fuckers win.
Asher looked up at me with those emerald eyes and said, “I love you so much, Theo. I’m so lucky to have you.”
“The feeling is very mutual, baby. You’re mine now. Nothing is going to stop me from loving you. Our love is stronger than their hate.”
Asher’s face brightened. He didn’t look crushed anymore; he looked determined, and it made my whole chest fill with pride. “You’re right. They can’t hurt us if we don’t let them.”
Asher rested his head against my chest again while I rubbed his back.
My life had been so superficial for the longest time.
I had no reason to worry about anything.
My folks were great, and I was an athlete.
I didn’t have a whole lot of reasons to think outside of myself before I met Asher.
But all that changed when I realized that he was the one.
You kind of grow up when you meet that person because, for the first time, someone else is just as important as you are.
When you’re a kid, it’s all, “Me! Me! Me!”
But it wasn’t just about me anymore.
I was mad. I wanted to rage, but Asher needed stability. So, that’s what I intended to give him.