Chapter 18 Charlie #3
“Yeah, yeah I know Mr. Anti-Romance,” Alec laughs, drizzling a hefty amount of olive oil into the pan before grabbing one of the smaller plastic margarine containers he brought and dumping it in. It’s not long before the aroma of frying onions, carrots, and celery fill the kitchen.
“I’m not anti-romance.”
“I’m not sure what else you call sleeping your way through Santa Leon and all five neighboring cities in this county.” He brandishes a spatula in Charlie’s direction. “And before you say it, I’m not slut-shaming you, I’m pointing out that you’re as bad as Theo is. Or was. He’s better now.”
Alec looks so proud as he says it, so secure in his relationship. He always was the bravest of all the Kings, never afraid to stand firm for what he wanted even when everyone, Charlie included, told him to let it go—to let Theo go.
“I’m happy for you, Alec. Theo’s good for you.”
“Are you sure you didn’t get into Andrew’s wine? He buys that fruity stuff that tastes like juice. Dangerous shit.”
“I’m serious, he’s a good man. You and Theo, and now Jason and Emerson.”
“You’re being weird as fuck.” Alec narrows his eyes, brandishing the spatula at Charlie and sending a few stray pieces of onion and celery flying. “Talk.”
“Talk about what?” Charlie tries, stalling.
“About whatever the fuck has gotten into you.”
“I thought you wanted me to be nice to Theo.”
“I do,” Alec says, flipping the burner on the stove off before stalking towards Charlie. He puts his hands on the kitchen island, hopping up onto the top so his legs dangle off the edge. “You’re still being weird. You’ve also been weird in the group chat.”
“I have not.”
Alec arches one eyebrow and Charlie sighs. Okay, maybe he has.
“It’s not a big thing, or maybe it is,” Charlie says, leaning back against the kitchen island. Maybe it’ll be easier if he’s not looking Alec in the eyes. “I think I met someone.”
“Like someone you might wanna fuck more than once?”
“Like someone I have fucked more than once. “
“No shit?” Alec grins. “You caught feelings?”
Feelings.
That’s one word for it. Lust. Affection. Joy. Desire. Passion. Eden invokes a lot of feelings in Charlie. Big, inescapable feelings. Most shocking of all, is the fact that he doesn’t want to escape them.
A few months ago, the idea of having a boyfriend was inconceivable, now the idea of a future without Eden is the thing Charlie can’t imagine.
“You could say that.”
“I knew it would happen eventually,” Alec smirks. “I fucking knew it. What are they like? He, she, or they? What’s their name? Tell me everything.”
“Eden,” Charlie offers with a smile. “He’s...he’s something special, Ally.”
“Eden.” Alec says his name as if testing it out. “When do I get to meet him?”
“Today.”
“Today.” Alec blinks. “Wait, you’re serious?”
“Yeah.”
There’s a weird tightness in his chest, a longing for something he’s never wanted before. He wants his brothers to like Eden. He wants Eden to like them. He wants Eden to fit with Charlie’s friends and family so he wants to stick around.
He waits for Alec’s boisterous reaction, surprised when there’s nothing but silence. Daring a glance at his baby brother, he’s taken aback by the look in his eyes.
“So, it’s serious?”
“I don’t know,” Charlie admits. “He doesn’t do serious but—”
“But you want to,” Alec finishes knowingly. “You like him.”
“He’s beautiful and fierce and sarcastic and calls me on my shit, and he’s funny in a really deadpan way, and he…he makes me happy, Ally.”
Alec slams into Charlie, squeezing him tightly around the middle. Charlie returns the hug, taking comfort in his brother’s embrace, letting his big heart shoulder the burden of Charlie’s fears—fears that Alec will be hurt when he finds out the full truth, fears that Eden doesn’t feel the same.
“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me before, asshole.” Alec slaps his arm. “Does he have dietary preferences? I would’ve made his favorite side dish.”
“Whatever you made is going to be perfect.”
“I made it, so naturally it'll be delicious,” Alec laughs. “How long has this been going on?”
“A while,” Charlie answers evasively.
“Oh.”
One of the things Charlie has always loved about his brother is that he doesn’t hide anything.
Alec’s always been so expressive, so open, which means the flicker of hurt he’s feeling is clear.
Still Alec tries to hide it, slipping off the kitchen island to busy himself with one of the casseroles covered in plastic wrap.
“I’m really happy for you, Charlie.” He tries to peel the plastic wrap off, cursing.
“I know I told you if there was ever someone you’d be the first to know but…it was complicated.”
“That’s okay,” Alec insists, smiling despite the fact that Charlie knows he’s hurt Alec’s feelings. He always promised if something changed, if he fell for someone, he would tell Alec immediately. He supposes he never expected it to actually happen.
“You told me now, that’s what counts.”
“You’re the best, you know that?”
“Of fucking course I know that,” Alec says, expression brightening. “You’re all so goddamn lucky to have me. Mom and Dad’s accidental pregnancy was the best thing to ever happen to this family. You’re welcome.”
Charlie laughs. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” Alec grins. “So come on, tell me more?
“What are we talking about?” Andrew asks, appearing in the doorway with Birdie and Agnes sharp at his heels.
“Nothing,” Charlie says.
“Charlie has a boyfriend,” Alec answers at the same time.
“Oh, Eden.”
“You know about Eden?” Alec asks. “Who am I kidding, of course you know about Eden. You two probably don’t even take a shit without telling the other one.”
“I can absolutely take a shit without telling Andrew,” Charlie protests.
“You did text me from the bathroom last night,” Andrew reminds him.
“Shut up,” Charlie tells him.
“So uh…everything is okay?” Andrew asks, eying Charlie with obvious apprehension.
“Of course it’s okay,” Alec answers. “Why wouldn’t it be?”
“I thought you might be a little upset about the age gap,” Andrew says, “but I’m glad everything is good.
“Age gap,” Alec echoes, turning his gaze on Andrew. “What age gap?”
“Uh, Charlie can tell you.”
“Tell me what, Charlie?”
“Eden’s just, uh…a little younger than me. Not a big deal or anything, Ally.”
Alec’s eyebrows knit together. “How much younger?”
“A few years,” Charlie offers.
As expected, Alec doesn't accept such an evasive answer.
“How many is a few?” Alec demands, pausing on his way to the stove. His grip tightens on the edges of the casserole dish he’s holding. When Charlie doesn’t answer, he turns an accusatory gaze on Andrew. “How many?”
Andrew holds his hands up, clearly not wanting to touch this conversation with a ten foot pole. Charlie doesn’t blame him, neither does he, even if this is his own doing.
“Ally, listen, it’s not that bad.”
“You’re making me think the worst by refusing to answer,” Alec says. “How many? Four? Five?”
“A few more?”
“Seven?”
“Twelve,” Charlie croaks.
“Twelve.” Alec whispers, lifting those big, brown eyes of his at Charlie.
They’re so full of hurt it causes a visceral ache in Charlie’s chest. Not that he can’t blame him.
How many times did Charlie tell Alec that Theo was too old for him?
That Theo would never, ever see Alec as anything but a child?
How many times, even after he found out they were together, did he try to persuade Alec to find someone his own age?
Sure, he stopped eventually when he realized that Alec had well and truly made up his mind about Theo, and when he realized that despite the messy path there, Theo seemed to truly love his brother.
But no amount of acceptance now can erase his past words.
Something he’s all too aware of as he watches Alec’s heart break in real time.
“I’m sorry, Ally. I should’ve told you.”
“Damn fucking right you should have fucking told me,” Alec snaps. “Were you even planning on telling me the truth before he showed up today, or were you going to let me find out along with everyone else?”
The only honest response would be the wrong one so Charlie says nothing.
“Fuck you, Charlie.” Alec hurls the casserole dish across the kitchen. It misses Charlie instead crashing into the wall behind him with a cacophony of shattered glass and splattered sweet potato.
Andrew sucks in a breath. “Oh shit.”
“Pinche culero.” The spatula comes next, a half-cooked piece of celery sticking to the wall while the spatula clatters to the floor.
“You know,” Charlie tries, “it’s not that big of a deal.”
“Not that big of a deal,” Alec repeats. “‘Not that big of a deal.’ You fucking dickhead.”
“Hey sorry, I was—what’s going on?” Theo asks, stopping in the middle of the archway to look between Charlie, Andrew, and Alec with wide eyes.
A glob of sweet potato falls off the ceiling, splattering onto Charlie’s Croc.
“Alec?” Theo prompts.
“Tell him you’re fucking sorry,” Alec yells, grabbing a pot holder off the kitchen island and chucking it at Charlie.
This time he doesn’t miss, hitting him in the face.
It doesn’t hurt, but Charlie almost wishes it had so he had something else to focus on rather than his raging guilt.
Andrew was right. This should’ve happened way before today.
“Is someone going to tell me what happened?” Theo questions.
“Charlie is the biggest fucking hypocrite in Santa Leon, that’s what.” Alec’s tone is dripping with betrayal. “You owe Theo so many fucking apologies.”
“I don’t need an apology,” Theo mutters, his shoulders hunching all the way up to his ears. That poor man is allergic to confrontation, and it’s a wonder someone as soft-spoken and shy as him ended up with someone like Alec.
“I think when you think about this, you’ll calm down and—”
“Oh no,” Theo and Andrew groan at the same time.
“A la verga,” Alec shouts seconds before he grabs a clean spatula, throwing it at Charlie. When that misses, he grabs a banana out of the fruit bowl and throws that too.
“I have eggs in the fridge if you need something else to throw,” Charlie tells him.
“Don’t fucking tempt me,” Alec seethes.
“Seriously, Ally.”
“No. Don’t call me that.”
“Ally, please.”
“I said, don’t call me that right now. I am so fucking mad at you.”
Against all reason, Theo walks across the kitchen and directly to Alec, who doesn’t throw anything or rage at him but instead collapses against Theo’s chest, making a sound that very much sounds like he’s crying. Charlie didn’t think he could feel worse.
Charlie was fucking wrong.
“I think you should go outside,” Andrew says, fingers curling around Charlie’s wrist.
“No, I need to clean this up. I need to say sorry. I need him to forgive me.”
“No, you need to leave him alone, Charlie.” Andrew’s tone is gentle but firm as he pulls Charlie out of the kitchen, his last sight of Theo hunched around Alec as if he can use his much larger body to shield him from the world—from Charlie.
When Alec was little, there’d been no one who could calm him like Charlie. With such a large age gap, he’d sometimes felt a bit more like a parent than a big brother, and he’d loved it because Alec was a great fucking kid. He liked being his brother's hero. He sure as shit isn’t one now.
“It’s not like I did it on purpose,” Charlie says, shuffling after Andrew into the living room.
Agnes purrs loudly, following Charlie onto the sofa and plastering herself in his lap.
He strokes her fur, wishing people were as easy as animals.
Birdie is sound asleep in the corner, clearly so used to the normal chaos of Charlie’s house not even that fight could wake her.
“He’s not even mad about the age gap, you know,” Andrew says.
“Uh, I think he very clearly is, or did you miss the part where there was a projectile casserole?”
“Okay yeah, he’s pissed about that, but Alec has big feelings. He always has. But did you see his face, Charlie?”
“Of course I saw his fucking face,” Charlie snaps. “Are you trying to make me feel worse?”
“No, I want you to think about from his side. He didn’t even seem to care that you kept Eden a secret, he’d forgive you for anything. Except that. You could’ve confided in him. He knows exactly what it’s like to love someone who you don’t think you’re supposed to.”
“Who said anything about love?” Charlie gripes.
“I have eyes, Charlie. I’ve seen the way you look at Eden, even if you refuse to acknowledge it. That’s not the point. The point is, you broke his heart by not confiding in him.”
“None of this is making me feel any better,” Charlie points out.
“I’m not trying to make you feel better, I’m trying to help you fix this.” Andrew squeezes the bridge of his nose, sighing so heavily Charlie feels it in his gut. “You hurt him. He trusted you to be honest with him after what you put him through.”
“I didn’t put him through that much,” Charlie protests.
“Bullshit.”
“Fuck,” Charlie groans, dropping his head against the back of the couch.
Maybe he had been a little harsh on Alec and Theo, but at the time so much had happened with Alec’s college burnout and his accident.
It was Charlie’s job as his big brother to look out for him, to protect him, wasn’t it?
In hindsight maybe Charlie had been harsher than he’d needed to be, but that was only because he wanted to protect Alec.
Because Alec deserved the best and Charlie hadn’t been sure if that was Theo.
“How do I fix it?” Charlie asks Andrew.
“You stop being a selfish ass when you don’t wanna deal with shit for one.”
“Harsh, but okay.”
“And you wait. You wait, and you hope Alec forgives you the way he forgives everyone. I’m pretty sure after what Theo did, if Alec can forgive him, he can forgive you.”
“Are you comparing me to Theo?” Charlie gapes.
“Sure am,” Andrew confirms, walking away from Charlie.
“Where are you going?”
“To clean up the fucking kitchen before everyone gets here.” Andrew walks towards the kitchen, pointing a stern finger at Charlie. “Now sit there and don’t cause any more trouble today.”
Charlie drops his gaze to Agnes, stroking her back. “We can do that, right girl? No more trouble today.”