2. Chapter Two
Chapter Two
Katie
“There you are! Get over here, Katie!” Harper shouts, and eyes in the room turn to Luke and me in the door frame. God, how awkward. I fight the urge to hide behind him. He’s tall enough, it could work, but what kind of big sister would I be?
Instead, I take a deep breath and plaster a fake smile on my face, then lift my hand for a finger wave.
“And Luke. God, it’s been ages! How are you?” Harper skips over to us, greeting each of us with a hug, then takes our hands to drag us further inside. Luke and her start chatting while I look around the room.
When Luke and I arrived, security not only crossed us off the admittedly very small guest list, but personally led us to the VIP area. I felt super-important when we passed people who looked at us jealously, but honestly, it reminded me of TV show scenes where inmates are accompanied around the prison by police officers.
I’m a nervous wreck, my thumb already sore from the nervous skin biting I’ve been subjecting it to, but ever since I told him we’re going to Jake’s show Luke has been brimming with excitement.
The room has a somewhat fancy, yet slightly gaudy appearance. The walls are painted in a bold black, and they're adorned with plush, deep red couches that are positioned to face a massive glass wall that extends to a spacious balcony with a view. As I take in the surroundings, I can't help but notice a couple of well-stocked refrigerators and, upon closer inspection, it seems there are even some snacks tucked away in one corner. What a luxurious way to watch live shows. I’ve never been to a show as VIP, but I could absolutely get used to it.
Suddenly, my phone vibrates with an incoming message, and I fish it out of my handbag.
Phoebe : Won’t make it. Noel’s sick and I need to prepare the bakery for tomorrow. :( Have fun!
I stare at those lines of text, my jaw tensing. That traitor. If I’d known she was not coming, I’d have thought of an excuse as well. And I know she knows it, too, which is probably why she’s only telling me barely half an hour before the show is supposed to start. Damn her.
I’m going to be the fifth wheel here, like a fish out of water, that one person at the party that nobody knows, the one everybody’s talking about but not with. I rub my eyes, trying to not smear my makeup as I let my eyes wander over the rest of the VIP lounge.
The room is filled with both familiar and unfamiliar faces chatting with each other, the padded walls muffling the sound. Harper and Luke stand at the balcony, where she’s pointing at the stage, probably letting him in on some behind-the-scenes secrets while Simon and Cole are in a corner, shooting the shit with beers in their hands. They are laughing and all of them seem so familiar with each other.
The muscles in my shoulders tense. I feel so out of place, painfully aware that I’m the odd one out here. I walk over to the buffet and get myself a glass of water to hide behind. Maybe I should wait outside. Nobody would even notice, not even Luke; he’s way too focused on what Harper is explaining. I gulp and take a step toward the exit when Eve suddenly stops in front of me, doing a double take. Then a smile brightens her face.
“Katie!”
My eyes grow wide. She still remembers me? Not wanting to be rude, I quickly school my face to hide my surprise.
“Eve!” I shout right back and step into the hug she offers. We weren’t incredibly close back then but it’s still lovely to see her. “How have you been?”
“So-so,” she says shrugging and shyly looking to the ground as she wipes a strand of hair behind her ear. “It’s been a wild ride. And you? It’s weird to be back but it’s so good to see you here.”
“So-so,” I tease her with a small smile. “I’m so happy to see you. What a shame Phoebe couldn’t make it.” I bite my lip and force myself to not roll my eyes. “Luke was super excited to see everyone again.”
I find him on the other end of the room, still talking to Harper, but now Simon has joined them, his arm casually lying around his girlfriend’s shoulders.
“Aren’t they cute together?” Eve asks with a sigh, following my eyes, and I nod slightly. “Those two are made for each other. ”
“That they are. I love that you all got your happily ever after with your teenage crushes,” I giggle, ignoring the red creeping into Eve’s cheeks. Of course, the fact that Cole and she are together spread in Windmeadows like wildfire once it went public.
“I guess we did, except for you. Yet.” She nudges me playfully, but I wave her off and shake my head. It’s not going to happen. Happy ends are for… people who aren’t me.
“I’m good,” I quickly say and clear my throat.
Her eyebrow rises ever so slightly as her eyes dance over my face. I’m not sure what she’s searching for and I’m not sure if she finds it, but I sigh with relief when she changes topics.
“Have you met Layla yet?” she asks and links her arm with mine, walking us over to one of the strangers. She introduces us and the three of us chat for a bit. Apparently, she’s Jake’s girlfriend as of three months ago. Her face lights up as she tells me how the two of them met, and I cackle when she describes in detail what kind of torture she wanted to subject him to when he stole her parking spot. That woman is petty, but so fucking cool.
Then the two of them whip out their phones and start showing each other pictures of their dogs and I tune them out. They’re cute dogs, no doubt, but it’s not a topic I can contribute anything to, except half-hearted at the pictures they show me.
God, I feel so out of place. What am I even doing here? I’m the lonely bartender between rock stars, a successful artist manager, and artists. My thumb wanders between my teeth as I let their chatter trickle into one ear and out the other.
They all have passions, and each of them is thriving and successful in their crafts. And then there’s me, a medium-skilled bartender working at a strip club who doesn’t have any hobbies or private life really, because work and sleep take up all of her time. God, I need to think about something else.
I excuse myself from the conversation and walk to one of the fridges by the wall and inspect its contents. My eyes grow wide when I am close enough to see the selection. After much consideration, I get myself a lemonade and find my eyes wandering over the room, wondering if…
“Paxton’s not coming,” Eve tells me quietly, right next to my ear, and I startle as her voice pulls me back to reality.
“Huh?” I look at her confused. It’s actually what I was wondering, but how did she know? Was it that obvious?
“Pax is not coming,” she repeats, and I raise my eyebrow at her. Witch. How did she know? “Don’t give me that look, of course, you’re curious about him. Nothing wrong with that.”
“What’s the story here?” I tilt my head and scrunch my nose in confusion. “Did they fight? Is that why Hystoria’s on break?” I’m not up to date on celebrity gossip, but Hystoria’s hiatus was such huge news that no one could get around them in Windmeadows. After all, they are our celebrities. I’m pretty sure Helen, the sixty-something-year-old woman who works at the supermarket, was the one who filled me in, and she doesn’t seem like she listens to their music. She looks more like the type to clutch her imaginary pearls when she hears a curse word.
“Something like that,” she answers cryptically. “I can’t talk about it because it’s not exactly public information, but they had a falling out and issued him an ultimatum. And now, nobody seems to know where he is and what’s going to happen to the band. ”
I mean, that sounds ominous. Issuing him an ultimatum? I wonder what that’s about.
Both of us jump when suddenly, loud e-guitar riffs resonate through the room. Si hurries to close the balcony door and the sound muffles. But the lights are still on, and the crowd is silent, they must be doing a sound check. It brings me back to our youth, when we listened to Hystoria’s sound checks from the crowd.
“What do you mean, nobody knows where he is?” I mean he’s a big dude, he can’t exactly disappear into thin air. “Don’t the guys have paparazzi and fans following their every step?”
“Usually, yes,” Cole suddenly appears behind Eve, snaking his arm around her hip and kissing her cheek before joining the conversation. “Hey, Katie, good to see you.” I give him a nod and smile in response.
“What are we talking about?” An influx of sound announces the door opening and Harper, Simon, and Luke join our group so that now we’re standing in one big circle. It’s giving me high school PE lesson flashbacks.
“Pax,” Eve lets them know, and suddenly the atmosphere shifts into uncomfortable silence as the Hystoria members, plus girlfriends, shoot each other wary looks. Paxton seems to be a sensitive topic.
“Have you heard from him?” Cole asks, eyeing me curiously.
I raise my eyebrows at him, surprised. “No, why would I have?” I ask him, confusion clouding my voice.
“You two used to be close,” Si says and cocks his head. “Come to think of it, I think you’re the only person from Windmeadows he stayed in contact with.”
“He didn’t though. The last time I heard from him was eight years ago,” I point out. Luke is looking at me with wide eyes and subtly shifts closer to me as he realizes what else happened during that time frame. Has it really been eight years already? I shoot him a reassuring smile. “Listen, us staying in contact was a very one-sided thing. He sometimes answered when I messaged him, and sometimes he called me in the middle of the night for whatever trivial reasons, then tore into me for being a bad friend when I told him I had to sleep. One day we argued, life happened, and I never heard from him again. There’s literally no reason for him to contact me now.”
And even if he wanted to, he couldn’t, because I changed my phone number two years ago; so, there’s that.
“Have you asked his parents?” They’re the only people I can think of who might know.
“His parents don’t give a fuck about him as long as he’s not a doctor,” Si snips angrily, earning an elbow to the ribs from Harper and a glare from Eve.
Cole rolls his eyes at him and elaborates, “He cut them off years ago. They had some issues that go beyond reconciliation.”
The others look at each other with expressions I can’t place. When I look at Luke he appears just as clueless as I am. Why are all of them talking so cryptically? It’s like they’re telling inside jokes.
“Anyway.” Si breaks the silence, just as the door opens, and Jake walks in with purpose and a stern expression. It’s fascinating to see it, considering he used to be the jokester of the bunch.
He makes a beeline for Layla and presses a kiss against her temple, then he catches Si’s and Cole's eyes and nods toward a corner before walking over there. Without hesitation, the two of them follow him and they huddle together, talking with hushed voices .
“Doesn’t he have a show to prepare for?” Luke asks Eve quietly and she answers with a nod and a worried line between her eyebrows.
“He does,” she confirms quietly and we girls, plus Luke, form a circle in another corner of the room, pretending to chat while we stare at the three of them, wondering what’s going on.
“I bet it’s about Pax. Maybe he finally messaged,” Layla whispers, narrowing her eyes as she looks over to the guys. “They look worried, what if he’s leaving the band after all?” Her eyes suddenly widen, full of anxiety for the three of them, but Eve shakes her head.
“He put way too much into the band to just leave. I can’t imagine that.”
“You can’t?” Harper chimes in, crossing her arms in front of her chest and rubbing them as though she’s cold. “I could imagine him fucking off, going solo, and doing his own thing. I bet he’d love to not have to compromise his ideas anymore and just do whatever the fuck he wants.”
Eve’s eyes widen at that. “Shit,” she curses and grimaces. “I didn’t think about that.”
“Who would sign him, though?” Harper wonders.
“Valid concern.” Eve bites her lip and tilts her head to the ceiling, putting both of her hands on her neck to massage them. “I can’t think of any label off the top of my head.”
“What if he founds his own?” Layla asks, and Eve’s head whips around.
“Shit, you’re right. I didn’t even think about that, either.” A heavy sigh falls from her lips and her shoulders deflate. “He definitely has enough money to do that.” Her eyes grow wide as she follows the thought .
I’m completely lost right now. Why wouldn’t a label sign him? Why wouldn’t it be surprising if he left the band? Why would it be bad if he pursued a solo career? Jake’s doing the same thing, after all. The answers seem to be common knowledge, though, so I don’t dare ask and just nod along, pretending like I’m in the loop.
The guys clasp each other's shoulders and then, suddenly, Jake turns around and fucking books it out of the room.
“About time,” Layla mumbles, checking the time on her phone.
“What’s going on?” Harper asks the remaining two men as they join our group again. Both have frowns and deep lines on their faces, fury in their eyes as though they’d like to punch something or someone.
“Pax’s been spotted. Someone saw him get into a rental car with only a gym bag and take off. That was two days ago, no sightings since,” Si grumbles and joins our circle.
“So, at least we know he’s alive, I guess.” Cole sighs and Eve reaches for his hand. “Or at least not dead for long. I mean, it’s not surprising that we’re not the first ones he called once he got out, but damn. It’s been two months already.”
‘Got out?’ Out of where? Luke and I shoot each other a confused glance. By the sounds of it he might have been in jail, which would explain the hiatus. But I’m pretty sure that would have made headlines in Windmeadows as well, you can’t keep that kind of information secret here. There’s always someone who knows someone whose cousin heard a rumor.
I see the wheels turn behind his eyes and subtly shake my head at Luke. It doesn’t concern us. Both of us have more than enough on our plates to get involved with this, even though just like me, Luke is dying to know what’s going on .
I wonder what happened with the Hystoria guys. The four of them used to be such a tight-knit group. They were basically brothers without the DNA connection; hell, they were closer than Luke and I currently are. And that’s saying something, considering we only have each other.
Was it drugs? Did he commit a crime?
So many questions fly through my head. Way too many, considering Pax is only a stranger now. But when I think about him, I can’t help but remember the afternoons we spent together lounging about, watching TV, laughing at dumb YouTube videos, or going on drives and screaming along to the music on the radio. The way he’d always be drumming with pens on a table, on his thigh with his fingers, there would always be a rhythm where he was.
But then I remember the afternoons after we fought, how I’d jump up every time my phone chimed, hoping it’d be him; the time when I really, really needed him to be my friend, but he didn’t come through; or the time I realized that nobody was coming to my rescue or even support.
The time I learned the hard way that happily-ever-afters aren’t for me.
Lights dimming and the background music stopping tear me away from my memories. Luke shifts his weight from left to right beside me excitedly and then grabs my hand and pulls me toward the balcony, his phone already in his hand to record pieces of the show.
The curtain falls and there he is. The others gather around us and join the crowd in cheering on their friend. Meanwhile, I lean against the railing, a wave of melancholy washing over me .
It’s nice to see they’ve made it. I’m happy for them. Hands to god. Overjoyed.
Yet sadness is settling in my gut, and I snake my arms around my middle. The what-ifs and could-have-beens constrict my throat and make it hard to swallow past them. I take a deep breath. Stop it, Katie. You can wallow in self-pity later. After you’ve enjoyed the first live show you’ve been to in so many years.
I exhale, forcing myself to be calm. Then I take a huge swig of my lemonade to push the lump in my throat away and focus on the show.
“That was so amazing!” Luke raves as we walk out of the venue.
We stayed for a while even after the show ended, until most of the crowd had already left, before we said our goodbyes, as well. Luke was too shy to ask the guys from Hystoria for pictures, but a little birdie must have told them he’d love to have them. They lined up to have Layla take pictures of him with them and even signed a random flyer for him. Now he has quite a lot of material to show off at his school and he’s over the moon about it, a smile plastered on his face.
“I didn’t know there’d be so much pyro! Have you ever seen so much fire on a stage?” He doesn’t let me answer as he chatters on. “And that’s the first time I’ve ever seen a mosh pit! How do they not get hurt?”
I smile at the excitement in his voice. “Are you finding your love for rock music?” I ask him teasingly .
His eyes grow wide, and he grins at me sheepishly. “I mean, it wasn’t bad.”
I laugh and shake my head at the unspoken ‘but it wasn’t my cup of tea either.’ To be fair, music wasn’t the number one reason he wanted to come in the first place.
“If Jake ever asks, I’m converted, of course.”
“Of course.” I roll my eyes exaggeratedly and shake my head at him.
Oh, to be seventeen again and have meeting band members be the peak of my high school life. I remember the special kind of thrill that gave me. It’s kind of sad that Hystoria only took off after they graduated high school. Had they become famous sooner, maybe Harper, Eve, Phoebe, and I would have been the ‘it’ girls of school, instead of the awkward wallflowers who hung out with the weird band guys who were dreaming of conquering the world. The joke’s on them because the guys did it.
A smile plays on my lips as I see the grin on Luke’s face as he stares at his phone and swipes through the pictures and videos he took during and after the show again and again. Then he looks up from his phone and at me.
“Thank you, Katie!” He steps closer and links his arm with mine. It’s awkward though, with him being a head taller than me now, so he changes his mind and puts his arm over my shoulders instead. “You’re the best big sister.”
When did he even become so much taller than me? It feels like only last week that he took his first steps, like yesterday when he barely reached to my belly when he hugged me and now, I need to tilt my head to look at his face when we’re standing close to each other .
“You’re very welcome,” I say softly and lean my head against his shoulder. Hearing it warms my heart. Maybe Phoebe is right. Maybe I’m not doing half bad.