Chapter 25 #2
“You then told me about Tia and how she broke your heart all those years ago. You also explained that you haven’t been with another woman since Tia.
There was also something else.” I play coy.
“Oh, that was it, you have a sick heart, caused by me, apparently, something to do with me almost giving you a cardiac arrest every time I walk into a room, and that your heart might explode.” I bite the inside of my mouth to stop myself from pulling a wicked grin.
Seeing him squirm like this is both deliciously enjoyable and evil in equal amounts.
“Okay, you can stop now,” he says gruffly.
I pout. “But there’s more.”
“I’ve heard enough.” His scowl grows harder.
“Are you sure?” I don’t miss how his gaze drops to my lips. “I mean, I thought you would like to hear how my heart does the same thing as yours every time I see you or think about you, and it flaps about wilder than a hurricane inside my chest.”
Eli’s eyes widen in disbelief, and I keep going, dropping more truth bombs.
“I’m guessing you don’t want to know that I also like you, Eli.
A lot. More than I’ve ever liked anyone.
In fact, at the risk of sounding juvenile, I have a crush on you and find you ridiculously hot.
I’ve also thought about you while using my vibrator. ”
His features soften for a beat as if he’s absorbing everything before he snaps back, “Stop talking.” He doesn’t shout, but the slight warning tone is enough to let me know he’s uncomfortable with this conversation.
While I, on the other hand, am not. Our unspoken words need to be aired.
I heard his, now it’s time he heard mine.
“I’ve also woken up with my hand between my legs more times than I can count, dreaming about you doing things to me, and when I wake up…”
He grunts, cutting me off with a low growl. “Don’t you ever stop talking?”
Persistence is my middle name, so I’m relentless and keep pushing forward. “…I’m disappointed when I realize it’s my hand down my shorts, and not yours. All I’ve dreamed about is what your hands would feel like on my body. Touching my skin.”
“Don’t.” His teeth clench so tightly that his jaw tics once, twice, three times before he lets out an annoyed breath. “Just, just stop,” he stutters.
“Why?” I answer quickly.
He gives me the silent treatment, so I fill the gap.
“Is it because you hate talking about your feelings or that you can’t handle hearing how I feel about you?” I ask, almost pleading to be taken over his knee and spanked. It’s the kind of thing I might enjoy, although I’ve never had it done to me before, so I’m not sure if I would like it.
“I don’t want to talk about it.” His words are raspy and deep, eyes narrowing.
“Why not?”
“Because every time I get something good, it slips right through my fingers.” His confession spills out of his mouth fast and unhinged, and judging by how his eyes pop out of his head, he’s in astonishment from sharing his innermost fears with me.
If he truly believes what he just said, it’s no wonder his mind doesn’t work right. My heart goes out to him, feeling his pain. I want to kiss away every one of his insecurities.
“Elijah.” I breathe out his name in sympathy.
“Don’t tell me it’s not true because it is. Good things never last around me, they always leave.”
“Are you referring to Tia and your dad?” He must be.
An impatient reply that’s full of sternness and gravel is what follows: “I don’t want to… can’t… talk about my dad.”
“Why not?” Talking is the best kind of therapy.
Lifting his hand in the air, he gestures to the wedding tent that will still be erected outside. “You saw him at the wedding ceremony yesterday, Sapphire. He’s dying.”
“In one way or another, we all are, Eli.” It’s a fact of life—the circle of it.
“That’s why we have to make the most of this one beautiful life we get.
” My mom and dad may live a lifestyle that doesn’t suit everyone and sing a song in their own key, but they always taught me to make the most of every day, grab opportunities when they come your way, and to live without regret.
Those are the mottos I live by, and I think I’m doing okay by following them so far.
My only regret is not expressing my feelings to Eli earlier. I hesitated because if he didn’t feel the same, working with him could have become very awkward.
But he likes me, finds beauty in every part of me, and I’m not holding back anymore.
“That’s so depressing,” he whispers, rolling onto his back. “And this conversation is too deep for… whatever time of the day it is.”
I sense him emotionally pulling away from me, so I do what I do best: distract him to bring us back into the moment and move smoothly to straddle him, positioning my legs on either side of his narrowed hips, my pussy perfectly aligned with his flaccid cock that’s gone soft from the seriousness of our conversation.
“What are you doing?” he growls, gripping onto my hips to stop me from fidgeting.
“What you’re not brave enough to do.” From this angle, every inch of him looks irresistible. Tan, abs, broad shoulders, his muscles… I want him bad.
“And what’s that?”
“To take what I want.”
“What do you want, Sapphire?” His fingertips graze across the skin of my hips, much harder than before, his thumb pad absentmindedly stroking back and forth as he wrestles with his thoughts, his cock thickening in his boxers again.
“You.”