Chapter 31 Cole
Cole
I blink my eyes open.
That particular shade of New England morning light means… it snowed.
The second thing I notice is Cassie.
She’s lying still, covers drawn up to the smooth skin of her bare shoulders. Her usually perfectly coiled ponytail is loose, splayed out like a sleek brown halo on the pillow. My insides tighten at the sight of that, how perfectly undone she looks.
Which is idiotic, because I just spent the whole night seeing Cassie way more undone than just her ponytail coming loose.
I’m already completely addicted to her. I’m hard again, just thinking about it.
I rarely sleep past six, but we were up late last night. By the end of round three, half delirious with pleasure, we’d finally fallen asleep tangled up together.
I force myself to tear my stare from her body, and go to the window, easing back the blinds a bit (but not enough to let too much light stream in, because if Cassie wants to sleep in my bed all day, I’ll happily goddamn let her).
There’s a thick blanket of snow on the ground outside, with more falling softly from the sky. Everything is glowing with that peaceful, snow-drenched gray.
“Cole?”
I turn at the sound of Cassie’s voice.
“Morning sunshine.” My lips rise into a smile.
I lower back onto the bed, reaching out to cup her face with my hand.
I’ve spent a year questioning every choice I’ve made in my life. But this one is certain. I want to touch Cassie all over again. Today. Tonight. Tomorrow. Give me a day, a time, a moment, and I’ll tell you just how badly I want to use it up touching Cassie Wells.
My thumb slides along the smooth skin of her cheek, across the sweet little kiss of her dimple. Fuck, do I want to kiss her again.
I lean in closer toward her. But her expression makes me hit pause.
She bites her lip. White teeth against soft pink. “Cole, wait. About last night. We said it was just this once—”
Warning bells.
I hear them ringing in my head. Fuck.
We agreed we were just getting it out of our systems.
In the light of day, I don’t want to stick to that. Not one goddamn bit. But I’m scared that Cassie does. My stupid instinct is to get away from the conversation before she can tell me it’s over.
“It snowed,” I abruptly blurt out. “A lot.”
She blinks, then turns to glance out of the gap in the blinds. She’s still clutching the soft white covers over her chest. “Oh. Wow, it’s really pretty.”
I hear my voice continuing on its own. “I have to clear the snow off the sidewalk outside the house. Neighborly etiquette, and all that. Don’t want people to slip on the ice.
” Cassie turns back to me, raising her eyebrows, and I clear my throat.
Christ, I’m still talking. “And Mr. Rabinowitz’s sidewalk, too.
He’s older and no good at shoveling and hates asking for help since his wife died, but I know he needs it. ”
“That’s—that’s nice of you, Cole.”
“You can stay here, though. There are fresh towels in the closet if you want to shower. And I can make breakfast afterward. If you’re still here.”
She looks a little confused, but nods her head. “Sure. I’ll go shower, then.”
Fantastic move, Cole.
If you’re still here?
Really smooth stuff.
I’m seething at myself as I quickly brush my teeth, pull on some warm clothes and a thick jacket, and grab the snow shovel from the hall closet.
Cassie opened her mouth, and I bolted out so she wouldn’t have the chance to do the thing. The thing where she tells me we fucked up and crossed lines and need to slow things down, roll things back, act like it never happened.
And I’m way beyond that point. There’s no returning, or forgetting, or pretending.
Cassie has me in any way she wants me.
If she doesn’t feel the same, it’s going to feel worse than any time I’ve been punched in the face.
For a hockey player, that’s saying a lot.
And okay. Yes. It is my neighborly duty to clear the snow off my sidewalk, and I do want to help Mr Rabinowitz. I’m not a cold-hearted bastard. I just very convincingly act like one sometimes.
I shut the front door behind me, cold hitting my face.
It stings my skin, and yeah, good, that’s what I deserve right now.
I make quick work of the sidewalk outside my house, trying to lose my stupid thoughts in the rhythmic, mechanical burn of my muscles as I shovel.
My fingers are growing numb in the cold, even through the gloves, but I move on to the house next door.
I give a gruff wave to Mr. Rabinowitz, who’s peering out of his window with a cup of coffee. Poor old man. Although at least he got married at all. I’m shoveling his driveway just to avoid being agent-zoned by the only woman I can imagine thinking about for the rest of my life.
After shaking salt onto the path, I head back up. Warm air rushes over me as I walk back inside, burning everything. I take off my snow-covered jacket, pull off my boots, and shake some feeling back into my fingers.
Okay. It’s about time to face my goddamn feelings.
As I walk down the hallway, I hear the patter of the shower running. My eyes catch on the bathroom door. It’s… ajar. Three feet open or so. Steam swells into the air of the hallway.
Heat surges in my veins. Is this an invitation?
“Cass?” I call out. My throat is dry, voice coarse.
“Cole,” her voice answers from inside. Warm and syrupy as maple. “You can come in.”
I push the door further open and step inside.
Cassie is in the shower. Water shimmers over her skin—somehow still looking sun-kissed in the depth of winter—as it cascades down over her. Her back is to me, but she looks over her shoulder at me with a smile, pale eyes glittering against the glistening brown waves of her hair.
Jesus fucking Christ.
She turns further around, and my eyes drop to her body. Her pretty pink nipples are stiffened, and heat rushes to my cock in an instant.
She meets my gaze. “Let’s talk, Cole.”
“You agents,” I manage to mutter, somehow finding my voice. “You always want to talk.”
She laughs, soft and sweet. “I hope most agents don’t use this particular technique on you.”
“It’s very fucking effective.”
The last shreds of my self-control went up in flames last night when I grabbed Cassie and kissed her, which is very inconvenient, because now—well, now there’s nothing holding me back from doing this. I pull off my shirt, drag down my pants, and step into the shower.
Warm water soaks me. I’m suddenly grateful for my NHL salary that allowed me to splurge on a big, luxurious shower. Big enough for me and Cassie to stand here facing each other. Big enough for lots of things.
I press the muscles of one forearm against the shower wall, leaning into her. Cassie looks up at me, biting her lip.
“So let’s talk, honey,” I mutter, and I can’t help but notice just how a shiver runs along her skin when I call her honey, despite the hot water showering down on her. Good information to have. Extremely useful.
“Do you regret what happened?” she asks. “You ran out of here so fast after I woke up.”
I laugh. With one hand, I bring her delicate fingers to the length of my hard cock. “Does it feel like I regret it?”
Her eyelids flutter with what I now know is desire. That feels so damn good, to know exactly what desire looks like written on her pretty face. “No,” she breathes. “But I mean—we agreed it was just for one night.”
“Cass,” I say softly. “I want more of you. More of all of you, every bit. Your body, your mind, your heart. I don’t want to stop.
Don’t think I could if I tried. I don’t regret it for one damn second.
It’s the best decision I’ve made in years.
” More like ever. “The fact that you invited me into the shower with you makes me think you might agree.”
“It’s… complicated,” she says. “I’m supposed to be supervising you. I mean, if Rick found out—”
I groan. “Don’t make me think about Rick when you’re all wet and naked in front of me.”
She laughs, that sweet, twinkling sound. “For what it’s worth, I don’t regret it either. I know I probably should, but I don’t. Not one bit, Cole.”
Relief floods me. It’s intense and potent. “Do you want to keep doing this?”
She nods. “I do. But we should have some rules. We don’t tell anyone. We take it slow. We don’t label it.”
“You want it to be casual?” I ask.
I don’t want casual. Not even slightly.
She arches a brow, as if she’s negotiating a contract clause. Which is so goddamn her, and so goddamn cute. “I don’t want to date anyone else right now. But we should keep it casual at least until the assignment is done.”
I’ll take what I can get. Whatever she’ll give me, I’ll eat it up.
And anyway, I understand. As much as I want to beg her to be my girlfriend right here and now, how do we go about that while she’s still babysitting me for her boss?
“That’s good with me, Cass. But if it ever gets in the way of your career, we hit pause. All right? I don’t want to put your career at risk because of me.”
She nods. “Okay. And the same for your career, too.”
She’s the one saving my career, not damaging it, but I don’t object. I just push my lips against hers.
“Deal,” I say against her mouth. “Now, let’s stop talking.”
I kiss her, swallow up the whimpering moan that passes her lips. I grip the curve of her ass, slick and hot under the water. My hand runs over her smooth skin to rest firm on her thigh, hinging her open for me.
“Cole, please,” she whines. It’s so fucking hot how she responds in an instant to my touch.
“I know what you need, baby.” My fingers dip down between her legs, gliding over her clit, enjoying how her whole body twitches in response—instinctual and desperate. So sensitive, but so needy. “Let me give it to you.”
Even with the water of the shower, I feel it. Her wetness, dripping down my hand and wrist as she grinds herself down onto me. She gets all shaky, squirming back against the wall of the shower, addictive fucking whimpers tumbling from those full, pretty lips.
“You need more, baby? Want to feel me inside you?”
“Yes,” she moans, eyelids fluttering, her head back against the wall. “Please.”
I slide my hard cock against her, teasing it out. My tip nudges her clit and she spasms. God, her pussy is so pretty. She’s soaked as I draw wetness along her opening.
I’m so fucking lost in the moment it takes me a second to blink back into reality. Right, logistics. Goddamn logistics. “Wait,” I mutter. “Shit. Let me get a condom—”
“I’m on birth control.” She swallows, looks up at me, glittering water droplets on her black eyelashes, and the sight is nearly enough to make me lose control right there. “And I haven’t— I’ve never done it without one before. So if you’re good, we can…”
“I’m good.” The words come out choked, because my brain is instantly on fire. “Clean bill of health.”
There's also the fact that despite the best efforts of hockey groupies, I haven’t had sex with any other woman in—how long? The best part of a year? I don’t remember. I don’t want to remember, not anymore. All I want is the present and future because that’s where Cassie is.
That’s where Cassie is naked and beautiful and begging me to fuck her.
“Please, Cole,” she whimpers, and the last shreds of self-control go up in flames.
I wrap one arm under her leg, easing her up, exposed for me.
I push up into her, and—
I want to fuck her good. I want it to be so goddamn good for her. I want it to be slow and teasing before it’s intense and fast.
But the feeling of her like this, just raw skin easing into the wet, tight inside of her, is almost too much for me to take.
My hips go erratic, the rhythm all off, for a few seconds I feel clumsy, drugged and stupid with pleasure.
But Cassie is moaning a raw sound, so maybe it’s just as fucking intense and new for her too.
“Baby, you feel unbelievable,” I groan, my grip on her tightening. “Do you feel how wet you are for me? Do you feel how tight you are around my cock?”
She gasps out a wordless reply. I breathe for a second, letting the water rush against my skin. I need to take a second, or I’m going to lose control too soon and fill Cassie up with my come before I’ve really gotten started.
After that, I regain my rhythm. I fuck into her, filling her up. The squeeze of her around me is making me lightheaded.
“Turn around for me, sweetheart,” I whisper, low and filthy in her ear.
Her eyes go wide and she nods. “Okay.” She shifts around to brace herself against the wall. Jesus, the sight of her like this, back curved and open for me, has instantly ruined all other women for me.
“Christ, honey. Prettiest thing I’ve ever seen.”
I take my time pushing into her, so deep at this angle.
Over the rush of the shower I can just hear the obscene, wet sound of me plying into her, then easing back out, then filling her up all over again.
Slow and teasing enough that I can feel her trying to wriggle back against me, frustrated and needy when I slide out of her.
“Patience,” I mutter. I pick up the speed of my thrusts and can feel her getting closer. That perfect little flutter, squeezing tight around me.
I steer her, hand in her soaking hair, twisting her around so I can stick my tongue in her mouth, my lips against hers as I fuck into her hard from behind. I feel the vibration of her moans against my lips, and I kiss away all her perfect little whimpers.
“Cole, please, it’s so—I need—don’t stop—”
I slide my hand around between her legs, my thumb pressing against her clit where we’re joined. When she tightens around me, gasping as she presses against my body, I fuck her through it, telling her how beautiful she looks coming around me.
All I have left in me are a few more seconds before my cock pulses and I finish inside her, deep and warm, for the first time.
Then there’s only rushing water, the sound of our breath, and Cassie’s body warm against me.
And one deal I’m praying doesn’t blow up in our faces.