Chapter 5 #3
But damn it all, I was so tired of the constant worry. Just for one night, I wanted to forget about everything weighing on my mind.
Did that make me selfish?
Probably. But that was something that my future self could deal with. My current self was going to cast everything aside and indulge in one night of fun before reality slapped me upside the head in the morning.
I didn’t bother turning on any lights. It was a full moon tonight, and the curtains were open, illuminating the room in a glow of silver.
My first instinct was to grab Ellis and pull his clothes off.
Get down to business before I could second guess myself.
However, as I started pulling at the buttons of his shirt, I stopped.
We’d moved from the workshop to the bedroom specifically so Ellis could have a good first remembered experience.
Acting like too much of a brute now would ruin everything.
Unless it turned out that’s what he wanted.
Testing the waters, I carefully pushed him back until his legs hit the edge of the bed.
Then, with slow gentle movements that he could easily pull away from if he wanted, I pressed forward just a little more.
He tipped back and fell onto the bed, bouncing when he hit the mattress, so he landed in a disarrayed tangle of limbs.
“Brody?”
In contrast to his body, his voice was delightfully small as he looked up at me.
For the first time, I could admit to myself that, physically, Ellis was just my type.
I’d always preferred partners that were a similar size as me.
It meant I didn’t have to be as careful or fear accidentally breaking them.
Yet, I also preferred to be the one in charge.
I had to take enough orders during my career as a soldier, and didn’t want that same dynamic to follow me into the bedroom.
Unfortunately, large burly men who were also submissive were in short supply. It was one of the reasons I hadn’t bothered to seriously pursue a relationship until now. One way or another, I always had to settle.
Ellis ticked all my boxes. Even the amnesia was a bit of a turn on, though I’d never admit such a thing out loud. He was a blank slate I could leave my mark on, and the sense of power that came with it was a heady sensation.
“Brody?” Ellis asked again when I didn’t respond.
I’d been lost in my thoughts for too long. He was going to start thinking something was wrong.
Stepping back just enough to give him some room, I cast the last of my doubt from my mind. Ellis didn’t need uncertainty right now. He needed a steady hand.
“Get undressed.”
He jumped and a smile broke out on his face as he immediately started undoing the buttons down his shirt. As I expected, he was much more comfortable with clear directions to follow.
His shirt hit the ground with a disproportionately loud sound. The only thing louder was the beating of my own heart pounding in my ears.
The dark curls on Ellis’s head continued down over his chest as well.
There was even an alluring trail over his stomach leading down to the waist of his pants.
I ran a hand over his bare chest, then stroked up his neck until I was cupping his chin once again.
Since he was sitting down, I had to lean forward to kiss him, but just before our lips touched, I stopped.
“All of it.”
“Huh?” Ellis said with a dazed voice.
We were so close my breath ghosted over his lips.
“Your clothes,” I reminded him. “Take off all of them.”
He swallowed a few times, swaying forward as if to chase the kiss that he anticipated.
I leaned back to avoid him. That wasn’t how it worked. If he wanted something, he had to do as he was told first.
When our lips still didn’t touch, Ellis jerked out of the daze he’d fallen into and finally registered what I was saying.
“What? Oh, right.”
The last of his clothing was removed with the same lack of ceremony as his shirt. He sat on the bed, leaning back on his hands with his legs slightly parted so I could easily see all of him, completely unselfconscious.
It was a refreshing change to what I usually expected with partners. Those who were submissive were often shy as well. On the rare occasion when I found someone who wasn’t shy, it usually came hand in hand with arrogance.
Ellis was none of those things. He was soft and eager to obey, but he was also very straightforward. Neither shy nor arrogant. He presented his body without any fanfare.
Maybe, without his memories, he had no reason to be self-conscious. There was nothing in his head telling him that nudity was something to be ashamed of.
Or maybe this was just how he was naturally. Either way, it was a win for me.
I pressed one knee against the edge of the bed, forcing him to spread his legs a little wider.
“Good boy.” I carded my hand through his hair, and he leaned into my touch. “Such good behavior should be rewarded. Is there anything that you want?”
It was only now that a blush of embarrassment spread over his cheeks. It was such an interesting contradiction. Nudity didn’t affect him, but his own desires did.
Looking up at me through surprisingly long lashes, Ellis tugged at the button of my pants. “Can I?”
“Can you… what?” I had an idea of what he was asking for, but I wasn’t going to make it easier for him. “Come on, Ellis. I need full sentences.”
“Can I… use my mouth on you. I think that’s something I enjoy. The idea feels right, at least.”
Well, I’d never say no to that.
“Of course.” My fingers remained tangled in his hair. “But you’ve got to do it yourself.”
He nodded so quickly he nearly dislodged my hand, and immediately started undoing my pants. His back was to the window blocking the moonlight, so it took him a few times to get my fly open as his hands fumbled in the dark.
The moment my pants were open, and my arousal exposed to the air, there was no hesitation. He immediately wrapped his hands around my cock and his mouth descended upon me.
I gasped and clutched his shoulders for support against the sudden pleasure that shot through me like electricity.
Until now, I’d been thinking of Ellis as a type of virgin, but that was wrong.
The man clearly knew what he was doing as his lips and tongue pleasured me with expert skill.
He somehow managed to find all my sensitive spots and even managed to swallow me to the back of his throat without any trouble.
And the man still didn’t have his memories, meaning all of this came purely from muscle memory.
My view of Ellis shifted. The man acted innocent, but once he regained his memory it was probably going to turn out that he had more experience than I did.
Not that I was complaining. Oh no. I certainly wasn’t going to complain about his past sexual history when I was the one benefiting from it now.
It took an embarrassingly short amount of time before I was already approaching my end. Not wanting to finish so soon, I tugged on his hair to pull him away from me.
“Stop. Ellis, stop. Not yet.”
He groaned, and the vibrations of his voice nearly sent me over the edge.
With one last harsh tug, I managed to dislodge him from me. He was panting and flushed, but there was a delighted gleam in his eyes.
“What?” he whined. “I wasn’t done.”
Pushing at his chest, I shoved him harshly back onto the bed and climbed over him.
“I’m not done, either. That’s why you had to stop. There’s more I want to do with you.”
It was a stroke of luck that I kept the lube and condoms stored in my bedside table.
Since I’d never brought a partner back to my house, and had no plans to do so, there was no reason to keep them close at hand.
I’d only bought them on a hopeful whim and stored them in the nightstand because I had no other place for them.
I silently thanked my past self for the spontaneous decision as I grabbed the supplies from the drawer, grateful that I didn’t have to leave the bed or even pull very far away from Ellis to reach them.
Unfortunately, that was where my luck ended. The lube bottle had never been used, and I had to fumble with the plastic seal around the cap to open it.
Ellis laughed. It was a breathless sound, but still obviously one of humor.
“Don’t tell me you’ve never done this before. At least one of us needs to remember what they’re doing.”
“I have,” I said through gritted teeth as I finally managed to get the damned bottle open. “Just not here.”
“So, I’m the first in this bed.”
He didn’t say so, but I could tell that the thought made him happy from the way his eyes sparkled.
“Honestly, you’re the first in a while. I’ve been too busy getting everything here built.”
“Well…” He eyed me up and down, then relaxed back against the pillows and let his legs fall open wider, bracketing my hips on both sides. “I hope you still remember how it works.”
That sounded like a challenge.
Coating my fingers in a generous amount of lube, I hitched one of his legs over my shoulder to open him up to me even more.
“See for yourself.”
The first finger slid into him easily. He threw his head back, clinging to the headboard as a second finger quickly followed the first.
Yes. Ellis definitely had plenty of experience before. Even if his mind didn’t remember, his body certainly did. There was a moment of resistance as internal muscles fought against the stretch of my fingers. But then, with a deep breath, Ellis relaxed, and I was able to press in even deeper.
“Fuuuck,” Ellis groaned when I hit a particularly sweet spot inside him. “Y-you do know what you’re doing.”
“Told you.”
I was already on edge, so I didn’t bother prepping him for long. I needed to be inside him immediately, and from what I’d seen so far, his body would be able to take it.
He’d probably even like it a little rough.
I rolled the condom on in record time, and a shiver traveled through me from head to toe when I finally slid inside him.