11. HAYDEN
11
HAYDEN
T his is everything Ive ever wanted to do behind a closed door.
Jared stands beside me, his hands propped on his hips.
Arent you going to tell me its not too late to go back?
Jared releases a breath.
If you wanted to, you would have, Despite his calm tone, I notice a slight shake of Jareds shoulders. Ill be right here if you need help.
He pats my back.
Dont come init doesnt matter what you hear. If Im not out in thirty minutes, leave.
Jared remains quiet. I ground myself, raising my hand and push through the door, wincing at the harsh smell of his cologne lingering in the air. I always hated it.
Giggles fill the room coming from upstairs. With the flash drive in my pocket, I tread up every stair, my fingers dragging along the delicate piece of glass he uses as the stair railing.
The giggles grow loudera woman behind his door. I waste no time pushing it open. She scrambles from his lap, spinning around in fright.
My fathers eyes widen; luckily, he hasnt yet reached the part where he has to undress.
What the hell are you doing, boy? He snaps. The woman, wearing nothing but my fathers shirt, glances between my father and me.
The flash drive hangs from my fingertips. I think its best if you leave this conversation for us.
I dont look at her, but she understands completely. She wraps her arms around her body, sidestepping me easily and sneaking out of the room.
My father glares at me.
Ive seen him a few times since Ive been back. Hes turned into an aging, overweight mana bald stereotype. He looks so much less intimidating than I remember.
Where have you been? Three days, no updates. And what did Vincent tell me about a mer
You dont need to worry about that anymore, I interrupt him, still holding up the flash drive.
My fathers eyes finally land on the flash drive and then on me. His eyes squint; I can practically see his wheels spinning.
What the hell is that?
Tell me what happened to Mom first. And then, Ill let you in on a secret.
Do you really want to talk about your mom? He scoffs, folding his arms over his chest. You killed her, remember?
Rage rockets down my spine, but I tamp it down to keep it at bay. Hes baiting me.
Fine, I can give you a hint, I growl, already impatient. Whatevers on this flash drive has the power to ruin your fucking life. Youll be amazed how easy it is to get into computers nowadays.
His face pinches. A crack. A halt to his wheels.
What the fuck are you doing, Hayden?
Lets be fair here, I hold out a hand. Everything in this world needs to be beneficial. Tell me what I want to know, and Ill tell you.
You shot your mother, Hayden, he scoffs. I dont know what else to tell you. She was taking you somewhereyou didnt want to go
Suddenly, memories flash into my mind from that night
Where are we going?
Her grip tightens around my hands as we race down the stairs, and she doesnt look back. She doesnt look back, not when the heavy footsteps echo behind usnot when growls so animalistic that they make my stomach churn fill the airand not when his shadow looms over us as we approach the front door.
Tears fill my eyes before I can stop them as if I already know what is about to happen.
Thats a fucking lie.
you reached underneath your bed before she could drag you and grabbed the gun Id put there for safety.
NoI didnt.
Merelda! He screams, his voice shaking the walls so violently that our portraits crash to the floor. My mother lunges towards the door, never once letting go of my hand, as I glance back at the figure behind us.
She reaches for the doorknob, but something stops her. She twists her head around so quickly that I can feel the breeze from her hair. I expect her to scream his name, but when I look up at her with my heart pulsating in my chestswollen to the point where I think it will burstshes looking at me in horror. And she releases my hand, dropping to her knees, never once breaking eye contact, until she collapses on the floor.
Hayden, no!
You knew how to shoot a gun. I taught you myself. When your mother got to the door, I called on you. Maybe you were startled or delirious in the middle of the night. But you shot her.
My hand shakes violently. I stalk towards him, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and baring my teeth. I lift him off the ground, my mind spinning and spinning. His eyes widen as he stares up at me.
Hayden
I throw him onto the floor, and he grunts in pain. His hands shoot toward me as he rolls onto his back. I land the first punch. My knuckles shift under the pressure. His yell echoes against the walls.
Tell me what happened, I land another, watching the bruises form. An ugly purple and blue.
Stop, stop! he yells, blood gushing from his mouth. Okay, okayyou want me to say I shot her, right? Alright. It was me. Me. Is that what you want to hear?
The room falls silent. His jagged breaths fill the space. I climb off of him, stumbling back.
Whyd you shoot her? My voice trembles, the rage in my body nearly uncontainable. And whyd you blame it on me?
My father coughs, leaning over the floor with his face down to spit out blood.
Do you want me to say Im just a coward? he shrugs, raising his hands. Theres no explanationat least not one youre looking for. Theres no justification. No logic. Your mother was trying to leave and take you away with her, so of course I shot her! Thats it. Why wouldnt I? You were young, impressionable, and easy to be a scapegoat. So I blamed it on you. It was so damn easy.
But its like her death made you evensofter. I thought you would enjoy it, feeling like you took a life.
She was my fucking mother!
And you survived without her, he deadpanned. No doubt with my help, though . . . if I hadnt sent you away five years ago, Id have a sissy for a son.
Im going to take everything youve ever loved away from you . . . you psycho! I step closer to him, shaking my head. The money, the powerall of it. Every evil deed, every illegal transaction, every illegal shipment, everything is on this flash drive.
My fathers shoulders tense. His body is frozen as the blood from his mouth continues to drip onto his shirt.
Oh, and copies are all ready to be sent to the FBI, in case youre wonderingIm only telling you now to be courteous.
He remains quiet, knowing that theres nothing for him to say.
The business will be infested with fedsand itll cease to exist by the time theyre done. Youll go to prison for the rest of your life, or you could simply . . . disappear. Im your only heir; you married once, and your wife is deceased. All your money and your assets will be handed to me.
And the worst part is . . . well, for you, I wont leave you a cent. Ill leave you homeless, wandering the streets searching trash cans for food.
My fathers eyes drop to the floor. I let it settle in, my heart pounding in my chest. I think for a second, a tear will escapean ounce of emotion. But nothing.
He brings his two hands up, wearily clapping. Quick bursts of laughter escaping his lips.
Psychopath.
Very well done, Hayden. Very well done, he coughs, placing a hand out to steady himself. Hes reserved to the floor, as if not having the strength to stand. You can hate me all your lifebut I taught you how to be that man.
I lift my chin and say sarcastically, Thank you.
Youre welcome, my fathers voice drips with more malice than before as he pulls a gun from under his bed.
The first shot rings out, and I duck quickly, charging at him. Another shot rings out, hitting a vase, and another bursts the pillows, feathers flying around the room.
I struggle with my father to get the gun. He digs his teeth into my hand, and I yell out, refusing to let go. The room becomes a battleground, shattered glass and broken knick-knacks littering the floor.
After landing a blow to his chest, I prop myself the best I can. The gun points at my neck, and I force it down towards him instead.
His eyes widen as he slowly succumbs. He shakes his head from left to right, our bodies trembling under the force.
I say nothing as it finally aligns with his chin, and with a final glance into those wicked eyes, I close my fingers around the trigger.
The deafening sound echoes through the room. Blood droplets splatter across my face, at the same time that brain matter litters the wall, the floor, and the sheets.
His body grows limp instantly. His life drained from his eyes without a lingering second.
The room descends in silence, that metallic scent filling my nose again. I close my eyes, dropping my shoulders and the gun. I tilt my head towards the ceiling.
I still feel thirsty. Thirsty for vengeance. Thirsty for a drive that cannot be sustained because no amount of rage will bring back my mother. No amount of rage will give me back all the time Ive lost all the love Ive lost .
But somewhere inside me, a tiny inch of peace resonates from watching my perpetrator, my mothers perpetrator finally succumb.
I stagger to my feet, staring down at the blood on my hands. But this time, it doesnt burn.
I all but stumble out of the room and meet Jared, hesitating on the steps. He takes one look at my clothes, at my hands, and his Adams apple bobs. We stare at each other for the longest time before he simply nods. No questions asked.
The woman? I ask as we slip out of the room.
Gave her some dough and told her to leave before the shots rang out.
I nod, holding up a hand as I walk over to the other side of the driveway. I pull my phone from my back pocket, dialing a familiar number.
Matteos Cleaning Service, where no mess is too big.
He fled the country. I need his house cleanedfor sale.
Got it. Well be right there.
Matteo no doubt knows how to make a crime scene disappear and make someone look like they disappeared.
Jared waits for me, deciding to take over and drive. The journey back home seems to stretch on forever in the silence. My mind replays the moment over and over.
But it doesnt feel torturous. I feel an odd sense ofrelief.
When I finally reach my front door, the empty house welcomes me. I head straight to my bedroom into my bathroom, scrubbing the blood from my hands until the only red remaining is the color of my palms.
I take a shower next, letting the water absolve me from my sins before collapsing in bed with a bottle of whiskey next to me.
The amber liquid will be my solace tonight. I cant face Charlie. Not yet. Everything Ive ever done is written all over my face, torn open by my father. I close my eyes against the pillow. As soon as I can sink into the shadows of my mind, Ill make everything right.
For now, this is a moment to savor.
The doorbell rings the very next day. I half expected it to be the cops, maybe even the feds, but I had already taken care of that. Money and, of course, the beautiful world of blackmail will handle many of your problems.
Charlie stands before me with a bouquet and a bowl. She gives me a stern look, curls falling over her shoulder as she tilts her head.
I was going to teach you a lesson about standing me up, she says, her eyes twitching. But Jared told me you were feeling under the weather. And you do look like shit. So Ill let it pass.
She drops the bowl in my hand, placing a hand on my chest. On her tiptoes, she presses a firm kiss against my cheek.
So you brought me flowers?
A soft smile grazes my lips as she walks past me. Yes. I brought you flowers.
She looks as if she belongs here, as if she is the woman of the house.
We need to get some paintings in here, Hayden, she sighs loudly, staring at the walls. Or maybewe can take cute pictures. With an actual photographer. Couples do shoots all the . . . oh my.
She covers her mouth as if shes said a bad word. I place the soup onto the dresser.
What is it? I ask, stalking toward her, and she blushes.
Were not a couple. Well yet. Or I dont know if you want to be at all, but theres no pressure. I just meant we can have our pictures taken so . . .
I wrap my hands around her waist, pulling her body into me as we kiss.
Charlie melts into my body, a small groan leaving her lips, and my cock jerks at the sound.
Before anything else can happen, I pull away, brushing her hair away from her flustered face.
You have and will always belong to me, Charlie. We are a couple. We may as well just get married.
Her chest trembles with giggles, and she lays her head against mine.
I love you, Hayden Scott. I shouldve said it before you leftif Id known this would happen, I wouldnt have been afraid.
My heart beats so loudly that Im afraid Ill pass out.
I love you too, Charlie.
Everything Ive ever needed to bring me peace is right here. All I had to do was reach out and grab it.
Amid all the noise in my head, one thing remained sure. Charlie silences it with a single glance. How I ever lived without her, Im not sure.