twenty five
"Remember, we are here to check on how she's doing. Not here to make her feel worse then she probably already does." Nika said to Azzi, parking the car outside of Athena's apartment.
"I know. It just feels a little weird. I mean i know we are friends and hang out without Paige but it just feels weird knowing they aren't talking and we are." Azzi expressed, holding the flowers and ice cream in her lap.
"Yeah, but she's our unofficial teammate and that means she's part of our family. Now come on, before you chicken out."
"I'm not chickening out, if anything you're the chicken." Azzi said, getting out of the car and walking around to meet Nika.
"How am i the chicken?" Nika closed the door and the two made their way to Athena's door.
"Whatever, just knock."
"You knock."
"My hands are full, i can't."
"Oh, right. My bad." Nika knocked on the door 3 times.
Inside, Athena was laying on the couch that was now messy from her sleepless night before. She was surprised when she heard a knock, not expecting to see anyone at all. The brunette pushed herself up and shuffled to the door, with red, puffy eyes she opened the door and was greeted by two of her- Paige's friends. Athena blinked, making sure she wasn't imagining Nika and Azzi standing there, "What are you guys doing here?" she spoke in a soft, unsure voice.
"Hey babygirl, can we come in?" Nika asked taking a small step forward.
"Why?" Athena asked in a slight defensive tone.
"Just let us in Thea." Azzi spoke.
Athena sighed, stepping to the side and allowing them inside and closing the door behind them. "Why are you guys here? I'm sure Paige told you all about what i did."
"She did. That's why we're here." Azzi said, placing the items down on a table nearby.
Athena furrowed her eyebrows, "So shouldn't you hate me?" She had always considered Nika and Azzi her close friends, but they were also Paige's teammates and thought they would've dropped her the second they found out she hurt Paige.
"Maybe...but we don't. Athena you're our friend too and we want to make sure you're ok." Nika took a step closer to Athena and placed her hand on her shoulder. The shorter girl looked at the hand on her shoulder then up at Nika's eyes, her eyes started watering and her lip quivered. Then she broke. Athena wrapped her arms around Nika, crying into her chest.
Nika was shocked but still reciprocated the hug, letting the girl cry. She looked over at Azzi who had a sad look on her face. It was obvious both Athena and Paige were broken up about this, so why would the same girl crying into her chest cause this whole thing.
The Croatian let Athena cry, rubbing up and down her back in a comforting manner. A few moments later, Athena pulled back, sniffling and wiped her eyes, "Sorry."
"It's ok. You wanna tell us what happened?"
Athena nodded, signaling for them to move to the living room. The two girls followed, not missing how the couch was set up as a bed. The three sat down, Athena on the couch, Azzi next to her and Nika on the coffee table in front of her. They stayed silent for a minute, waiting for Athena to start but she was staring at her lap and playing with the ring Paige bought for her birthday.
"It's stupid."
"Clearly not if it made you this upset. Just tell us, we won't judge you." Azzi said in a soft, comforting voice.
"You can't tell Paige. She'll just be more mad then she is." The basketball players agreed, "...I got scared. When i woke up before Paige, i went to the kitchen to make us some coffee and thought it would be a good idea to check my instagram since i hadn't in a few weeks...when i did there was uh- there were comments on my post about us. People were threatening me? Not really but they were Paige's fans and basically thought we were dating so they got all protective over her or something. I had been getting them before but they weren't as bad, up until i found a news article."
Nika and Azzi looked at each other, they weren't aware that Athena had been getting comments. They also weren't aware that a newspaper wrote about them, it must've just come out that day for them not to see it.
"It was actually about me and Azzi. You know how everyone thought you guys were dating and stuff but they were comparing us, claiming that we actually hated each other and were fighting for Paige's heart. It was all fake and stupid, a random person could read it and tell it was made up. But i guess people believed it and were on your side. The article had thousands of views by the time i saw it and that's why i had more comments about it then before."
"I was fine with it, because it was normal but then one comment caught my attention. It was about my mom...it was something like 'Paige doesn't deserve to be with someone who doesn't have a full family, she should be with someone who has more then 1 relative.' I don't know how they found that out but it terrified me, and the comment had a few thousand likes and replies. That's what started it, then i got a few dms threatening me physically. It public knowledge that i go to UConn and live on campus and where i'm from and stuff and they threatened to hurt me or my dad if i didn't back off of Paige."
"Athena..." Azzi started but was cut off.
"I know people are cruel and they were just empty threats but i can't let them become real. And I care too much about my image to throw it out the window for a silly relationship that won't work-"
"Stop." Azzi interjected, "Athena i'll get to everything else but do you really think you and Paige won't work?"
Athena wordlessly nodded, "yeah, it didn't before, why would it now?"
"Because that girl loves you. She's told me, multiple times, that she sees a future with you. Every single day she would come into my room to rant about you, and when you guys finally figured shit out after Alex, she has spent months planning your first date. Paige is so in love with you, every body on the team is sick of it because she talks about you so much." Azzi explained.
"Yeah, i hate it. I mean i'm happy with my boyfriend but i know we could never compare to you two. Twin is so extremely down bad for you. She doesn't care about the media or anything, and trust there is nothing she cares about more then keeping a good reputation but she would throw all that out the window just to hug you, i swear. It sucks about the comments you get, but then again why should you care? I bet half of them are jealous boys who are upset they can't have Paige instead." Nika spoke, taking one of Athena's hands to stop the fidgeting with her ring.
"...i didn't know she cared that much, she just told me she likes me." Athena said, speaking lowly and avoiding looking at the other two. "But it'd just be selfish."
"Athena." Nika firmly spoke, squeezing the hand she was holding, "you need to learn to be selfish for once in your life. Stop worrying about everyone else and take care of your own wants...your needs."
"...will she even forgive me for this? Let alone still want to be with me?" Athena wiped at her eyes, clearing her face of any stray tears just to be replaced by new ones.
"You could tear both her ACLs, punch her in the face, shoot her in the foot, and ruin her basketball career and that girl will STILL be head over heels for you. Trust me Athena, i never hear the end of it. She doesn't want anybody but you...ever." Azzi said, drawing a laugh from both Nika and Athena. "I'm not saying she's going to forgive you before you say anything because she is pretty broken right now even if she's trying to hide it. But she will forgive you eventually....We are traveling tomorrow for our game but after you two should talk."
"yeah...how is she?" Athena asked.
"She's..." Azzi started.
"Lost." Nika finished, the curly haired girl nodding in agreement. "One minute she's mad, the next fine, then on the verge of crying. It's like she doesn't know how to act without you and it's been 1 day. Look i love you Thea, i do but you gotta fix this. Soon."
"I know."
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"Paige!" KK shouted.
"Hm?" Paige blankly responded. She hasn't been paying much attention to the conversation. The entire team was out at a dinner after spending the day traveling. It was a sports bar type restaurant, the only one that would take a party large enough for everyone. The blonde had been out of it for 2 days, ever since she left Athena's apartment and everyone noticed. She had been semi good at hiding it, just keeping to herself and holding a blank expression.
Only Azzi and Nika knew about what happened between Paige and Athena, everybody else was in the dark on why the star player was so cold and closed off for the past 2 days. She locked herself in her room, rejecting everyone who knocked on the door and ignoring any conversation that didn't involve the upcoming game.
It was also weird not having Athena around, usually the two of them acting disgustingly in love and being all smiley around each other but now? Paige was locked in her room and Athena was crying on her couch in the blonde's hoodie because everything in her room reminded her of Paige.
2 days felt like 2 months.
"Do you have an opinion? You always do."
"Nah...Actually i think i'm gonna crash for the night. I'll see y'all in the morning."
Paige stood up, ignoring the protests from the group and heading out of the sports bar and walking back to the hotel. She walked in silence, trying to keep her thoughts on the game tomorrow but they kept drifting to Athena. There was no way to get her out of her mind, even when they weren't speaking.
Paige took her phone out of her pocket, opening it to already see the brunette's contact pulled up. It was non stop, checking every 5 minutes to see if she texted. She was debating just calling, making sure Athena was ok much like she did almost daily for 3 years when they were thousands of miles away and not talking. Paige hovered her thumb over the call button, staring at her favorite picture of Athena above it. The blonde bit her bottom lip, rubbing at her forehead with her free hand then turning off her phone and shoving it back in her pocket once she noticed the hotel in front of her.
Paige arrived back in her room, laying down on the bed and covering her face with her hands. Then she felt a buzz in her pocket. The girl was quick to take her phone out, praying it was from Athena but also hoping it wasn't. She was disappointed and relived it was just a text from her mom, wishing her luck tomorrow.
Paige managed to go to sleep before Nika came back to their room, not wanting to be confronted about her behavior...again. She woke up the next morning and walked down to the lobby for a team breakfast. Again, keeping to herself and not saying a word, going about her own thing and mentally preparing for a basketball game without words of encouragement from the girl she thought she was going to spend her life with.
Warmups were normal, it was typical for everyone to kind of be in their own zone to prepare. Normally, Paige would be thinking about Athena's smiling face, about what she was coming home to, about who she was winning this for. Now, she could only think of the cold expression she had when kicking her out after, what she thought, was the best night they've had together in years.
She tried to shake the thoughts but they were persistant. Nika managed to sneak in a conversation with Paige, mainly just her talking and the blonde humming in reply. But what she did say was "use this as fuel," and that's exactly what Paige was going to do. All sadness was thrown out the window, only being driven by her anger at Athena to push through this game to move onto the next.
Earlier, Paige would've been semi-okay with getting out now, because then she would have the girl of her dreams, but now? Now, she had nothing to go home to and this was the only thing she could look forwards to.
The blonde didn't miss a basket the entire warm up. She was so zoned in that she didn't even notice the time ticking down until tip off. Athena left Paige's mind, only basketball and determination fulfilling the hole.
Athena sat at home, still on her couch, but accompanied by Ashley and Olivia, the two most invested people in her relationship status with Paige. She was yet to tell them about their...break up? Knowing they would give her an earful about it and make her feel worse about it then she already does. Plus they would just say the same things she heard from Nika and Azzi, that she was wrong and to make up with the blonde. Athena didn't say they were wrong, because they weren't, she just didn't need to be told twice.
The two teammates insisted on coming over because, "it's tradition we all watch your girlfriend's games together, wether it be in person or on screen." So now, Athena had two intruders in her apartment, tearing up her pantry, looking for snacks. They agreed on just ordering a pizza, watching the warm ups while they waited for it.
Since Paige is THEPaige Bueckers, she was on screen for almost the entire time up until tip off, even including her taking off her warm up sweats. It was torturing Athena, watching and knowing she could have all that and more belong to her. She hid her face in the UConn basketball hoodie Paige gave her--she left it at her apartment and didn't let her have it back--inhaling the scent and imagining the blonde walking through that door and kissing her.
The game went as expected, constant back and forth between the two teams but UConn ultimately coming out on top. The TV showed the celebrations of the team, jumping up and down in a huddle and confetti flying through the air. The three were having their own celebration in Athena's apartment, clapping and taking a shot in victory.
The commotion quieted, Ashley and Olivia getting over the win and moving on to their phones but Athena was still stuck to the TV, watching the teams celebrations. Their was one specific shot that took Athena's breath away, it was of Paige wearing the conference champion hat and confetti falling around her, she had the brightest smile on her face and so did her teammates around her. Seeing that solidified every feeling Athena ever felt confused about, she is in love with Paige. Deeply and completely in love with Paige Bueckers.
"Yo, your girl went OFF! I know y'all waiting til the end of the tournament but i think that performance deserves at least some good head." Ashley said, shaking Athena's shoulders.
"...I fucked up. Badly." Athena spoke, loud enough to be heard.
"huh?"
"I fucked up."
"With Paige? Please say no. I swear to god if i have to hear about anymore of y'alls drama instead of the happy ending i'm manifesting, i'm kicking you off the team. I can do that, i'm captain."
Athena's silence spoke for her, "uhm..."
Ashley sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose, "what did you do now?"
Athena explained herself, earning a punch on the side of the arm from both of her teammates, "Ow! What was that for?!"
"Being an idiot. You better fix this, i have money on you guys. Also because i love you and can't stand seeing you this miserable. When are you going to talk to her?"
"Money on us? Never mind. I don't know, i was thinking about tomorrow because that's when they get home, well technically they get home tonight but it might be too late by the time they get back for me to talk to her but-"
"It's not! If you want to show her that you're truly sorry you need to show up at her place now. Go sit in her room until she arrives."
"s-seriously?"
"Yes! What's the worst that could happen? If she tells you not tonight then just guilt her with the driving in the dark card and sleep in her bed with her."
"She's not gonna let me-"
"Yes she will. No matter what, talking or not, that girl will let you sleep in her bed anytime. Now go, i don't want to see you here anymore."
"Ok....Ok! I'm doing this!" Athena hyped herself up, grabbing her keys and heading towards the door, then pausing. "This is my apartment....if i'm leaving so are y'all."
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Athena used the key Paige gave her, unlocking the door and going to wait in Paige's room. Her knee was bouncing and she was chewing on her nails while constantly checking the time. Finally at 2am, she heard a door open followed by voices.
Athena sat up straight, considering if she should just run out of here or stay and make Paige kick her out. She gnawed on her lip, hearing the voice of a certain blonde getting closer and closer to her room. The doorknob twisted, solidifying Athena's fate and slowly the door opened. A very tired Paige shuffled in, dropping her bag by the door then looking up at her bed. Paige froze mid-step like she was in a cartoon. She blinked her eyes, rubbing them for good measure to make sure she wasn't very tired and this was in her imagination.
Once she realized it was real, her face fell flat, "What are you doing here?" She said in a plain tone.
Athena's heart almost broke at those 5 simple words, never has Paige ever sounded so...defeated and cold towards her, she was always bubbly or at least trying to be. "I uhm...wanted to talk to you. About that night."
"The night when you broke up with me? Oh wait no, we'd have to be in an actual relationship for that to happen."
"Paige..." Athena stood up from the bed, taking a step closer to Paige.
The blonde took a step back, shaking her head, "Athena, i had a really good day, the first this week and i would really not like to ruin that. I am extremely tired, it is 2am, and i don't have the energy for this. Let's just- can we do this later?"
"yeah...of course. I'll leave now." Athena walked past Paige, slightly and purposefully brushing their shoulders. She made it to the door, reaching for the doorknob and fully prepared to go back home until she was stopped by a hand grabbing her forearm.
"Wait...i don't want you driving home at this hour. You can stay for the night and then we can do this tomorrow." Paige dropped her arm, turning back around once Athena nodded and heading to her room with the brunette following behind. The taller led Athena to her room, "uh, you know where everything is, take whatever you need. I'll be out here if you need me." The blonde started to leave but was stopped by a hand grabbing hers.
"Paige, i'm not kicking you out of your own room after your traveled....come in here...with me."
"Sorry Athena, i only sleep with someone who's my girlfriend but you've made it clear you're not that. Night." Paige pulled her hand away, shutting the door behind her and leaving a depressed Athena behind.
The next morning, Paige woke up before anyone else. She stayed on the couch she slept on for a few minutes, scrolling on her phone until Athena walked out. When she finally did, 30 minutes after she woke up, Paige stood up and walked over towards her.
"We can go to our normal breakfast place, talk there?" She said before giving Athena a chance to even say good morning.
"yeah..." The brunette mumbled, she expected Paige to be mad or sad but this seemed like neither of them. She seemed more...cold then she expected, like she didn't want to speak to her and that was worse then anything she could think of. Athena hated the thought of Paige wanting nothing to do with her, the basketball player was her comfort and having your comfort not be there anymore? Worst feeling.
Paige nodded, heading to her room to grab some clothes to change into and letting Athena do that same before escorting the two to her car. The blonde didn't offer to open the shorter's door for her, making her do it herself then driving off to their usual spot. It was silence the whole time, not even the radio playing, just the sounds of the roads. Athena wanted nothing more then to grab a hold on the hand that was resting on Paige's leg, doing nothing and lace their fingers but that would be unacceptable.
The two arrived at the place, getting out of the car and into the booth they always sit at when coming here. Neither of them knew how to start this, wondering if they should order first then get to the heavy stuff or talk now and eat when they had made up.
They ordered drinks first, sitting in silence across from each other...until Paige spoke up. "Did you mean it?"
Athena was shocked by her voice, "what?"
"Did you mean any of it? Or was everything just an elaborate plan to get me to feel like how i made you feel in high school? Because if so-"
"No! No. I- I meant...all of it. Everything was real. I promise."
Paige let out a shaky breath, "then why? I thought it was going good, i thought we would've finally had our chance Athena...did- did i do something to change your mind?"
"No Paige, it wasn't you. I-" Athena sighed, embarrassed she let something so silly get in the way of them. She pulled out her phone and opened instagram, clicking on the dms icon and turning the phone towards Paige. "I got scared....it's a long story but basically people are not the biggest fans of the idea of you and me together so they did that."
Paige picked up the phone, clicking on the first message and what she read horrified her. She clicked through the first 10 messages, all the same type. Athena took her phone back, opening her photos app to go to the screen shots of the article then handing it back to Paige as she continued explaining.
"It's still no excuse...but i was so scared, i still am. You know how much i care about my image and how i come off and this just got to me. They mentioned my family, Paige. My mom. I don't even know how they found out about that but...i was so terrified about everything that i ran. I ran from you, i never meant any of the things i said to you. Of course i want to be with you and of course i think it's going to work, how could it not? I care about you so much Paige...and i'm so sorry that i hurt you. It was never my intention, please believe that...i'm so sorry."
Paige stayed quiet, her eyes still focused on the screen in front of her. Then she finally looked up, licking her lips like she was about to speak but held back. She abruptly stood up, grabbing one of Athena's hands with her and dragging her to the bathroom. Immediately after the door shut, Paige pulled Athena into her chest and wrapped her arms around her. The shorter reciprocated, melting in her arms and the both of them letting their emotions flow.
"I'm sorry...so sorry." Athena spoke into her chest.
The blonde shushing her, "shhh...i'msorry."
"Why are you sorry?"
"It's my fans...i'm so sorry they did that to you Thea. I had no idea."
"It's not your fault."
Paige cradled Athena's face in her hands, leaning forward to press a kiss to her forehead then craning her neck down to be eye level with her, "You know you could've just talked to me about it. Wouldn't of had to go through all of this."
"I know...and i will. From now on, full transparency with you."
"Good....though arguably it did make me play better."
"Oh? So i gotta make you mad more often is what i'm hearing."
"No, none of that. If you think i play good when i'm mad, just wait until you see me play when i have you as mine."
"I've always been yours P."
"Ditto."