Chapter 22
H ayes pulled up at the hospital. He was lucky that there were no cops out tonight since he’d sped the entire way. But now that he was here . . . he couldn’t seem to get out of his truck.
There was a strange lump in his throat. A tightness in his belly.
He’d nearly lost his mind when he’d gotten to the trailer and she wasn’t there . . . and then there was the blood.
Fuck. So much blood.
He wasn’t squeamish. He’d been a SEAL, he’d seen a lot over those years and yet none of that had ever made him panic or want to hurl.
Or punch a hole in a trailer wall. He’d have to fix that. Although that trailer was already in a bad state.
You cannot go in there like this.
This wasn’t him. He never reacted this . . . strongly to anything anymore.
Because you don’t let yourself care about anyone.
But you care about her.
Shit.
He didn’t want to have feelings for her. He didn’t think he could go through losing someone he cared about again.
Losing May had ruined him.
Didn’t take you for a coward.
May’s voice filtered through his head.
“I am, though, May,” he whispered. “I was scared to go on without you. I closed myself off so I could just get through day to day. And now . . .”
You met her.
Yeah. He had. And it was a betrayal of what he’d felt for May.
Don’t be stupid.
He had to smile at those words. They were something May would definitely say.
You wasting your life . . . that would make me mad. You finding someone to love. Never . . .
Hayes sighed and closed his eyes for a moment. He wished that he really could talk to May instead of this figment of his imagination. But May was gone and he was simply trying to justify letting himself feel something for this girl.
Fuck!
He stared down at his clenched fists. He hated that she’d been harmed. That he hadn’t been there to protect her.
Just like before.
No. He couldn’t do this again. However, that didn’t mean he could just walk away without checking on her.
What if she was in real danger?
God. He hated this.
There was a part of him that wanted to take her safely home with him and keep her there, locked up in his bedroom, where nothing could get to her.
“Just go in there. Check on her. Make sure she’s all right. Then . . . leave. You still have a job to do.”
Right. He had a plan. He was sticking to it. He wasn’t going to fall for this girl. She wasn’t his responsibility.
In. And out.
He got out of his vehicle. It was getting lighter out and he hadn’t slept at all. But there was no time for that. Donovan messaged as he walked to the doors.
Donovan: Stein is being charged. He’ll be up in front of a judge today. Cops aren’t happy that he claims he doesn’t know who paid him.
Hayes clenched his jaw. He wasn’t happy about that either. There had to be more he could do to help Rohan.
Not that it’s your problem.
But, fuck, he hated the injustice of it. Mostly for Devi’s sake. Although Rohan was in a gang so maybe she’d be better off without him in her life.
Hayes: Webb is watching Sondra. Devi is in hospital. Will let you know more details soon.
He stepped up to the desk in the hospital.
“Hayes.” Turning, he saw Honey. “Come on, this way.”
“How is she?” he asked
She sighed as they walked into a private waiting room. Ammo was in there. Where was Zander?
“She’s in with the doctor now,” Honey told him. “They’re going to take her into surgery.”
“Surgery? What the fuck happened?” he demanded. “What caused all that blood?”
Calm down.
Like fuck. He didn’t want to calm down.
Zander walked in wearing just a T-shirt and there was a suspicious stain on his jeans.
“What. The. Fuck. Happened.”
“See? Told you he would lose his mind,” Honey crowed to Ammo, who just shook his head and handed her twenty bucks.
“I am not losing my mind,” he managed to say calmly.
Well, sort of calmly.
“I simply want you all to stop giving me the run-around and tell me what the fuck is going on!”
All right, so he might be getting a bit loud. But he was not losing his mind.
Nope. Not him.
“Easiest twenty bucks I ever won,” Honey said gleefully.
“Is this funny to you all?” he asked in a low voice. “I walked into that trailer to find stuff smashed, blood on the floor, and no Devi. Is it any wonder that I’m upset.”
Honey grimaced. “Fuck. You’re right. Sorry.”
“It’s our way of coping, man,” Ammo said. “Sometimes you see such bad shit that it’s joke or lose your mind. But there was nothing funny about what happened to Devi. “
“Nothing at all. In fact, when you decide to go hunting for the scum that hurt her, we will all be coming with you,” Zander told him as Honey handed the twenty dollars back.
He didn’t mean to make her feel bad. Hayes understood that terrible things could change you, haunt you, unless you found a way to cope.
Zander’s team was a strange bunch. Quirky and odd. But they were all decent people.
“Hunting? Who are we hunting?” he asked.
“We don’t know,” Zander said. “She wouldn’t tell us and we didn’t want to press her too hard.”
Jesus. She must have been in a bad state.
Do not throw up.
“Tell me everything.”
“Honey and I were just going to scout around,” Zander told him. “There was no movement inside the trailer but all the lights were on. I peeked in a window and saw Devi on the floor. And she wasn’t moving.”
Hayes sucked in a hard breath. The world around him started to grow dark.
“Maybe you should sit down,” Honey said with concern.
He shook his head. “Keep going. Tell me.”
“We decided not to wait and go in,” Zander said. “She regained consciousness while we were discussing how best to move her.”
“Her injuries?” he managed to get out.
Fuck.
Why had he left her? If he hadn’t gone when Donovan called he would have been there.
He could have protected her.
Instead, he’d assumed she would be fine and he’d gone to help Donovan. And then instead of going to check on Devi, he’d gone to Sondra.
It was like May all over again. He’d left on deployment and assumed she would be fine without him.
But she hadn’t been.
History couldn’t repeat itself. She couldn’t die.
He wasn’t sure that he could live with that.
“Someone stabbed her with a knife,” Honey told him.
What. The. Fuck.
Breathe. Just breathe.
You cannot pass out.
“A knife? Why? Where was her father?” he managed to ask.
“She told us that these guys attacked her and kidnapped her father,” Zander told him. “But also that it was his fault. Have any idea what that means?”
Fuck. Shit.
“Not sure, all I know is that her father is an alcoholic.”
“Poor girl. Her old man is an alcoholic and her brother is in jail for a murder he didn’t commit. Think this attack has anything to do with the brother?” Zander asked.
“I don’t know.” He hated that he had no idea.
“She didn’t mention anyone else yet someone had done some First-Aid on her arm before we got there,” Zander told him.
Someone who helped her but hadn’t stuck around or called an ambulance?
“Could be a few hours before she’s out of surgery,” Honey added. “Can we get you anything? Food? Coffee?”
“No, nothing.” Fuck. He wanted to hunt down the people who had done this but he also knew he couldn’t leave her. “I need you to find out who did this.”
Zander nodded. “Honey, stay with Hayes. What about Donovan?”
“Gone back to the Steins’,” Hayes said. “He’ll deal with Sondra.”
“All right, then we’ll go hunting,” Zander said. “That is my favorite sport, after all.”
Hayes didn’t have it in him to respond. He thought he might be in shock. Everything around him felt hazy.
“Come on, big guy. Sit down before you fall. You’re built like a huge redwood. I don’t know if I could move one of your legs let alone that trunk.”
He gave Honey a look of disbelief. “I don’t need to be managed.”
“Managed? I wouldn’t do that. I just think you should sit, is all. But hey, you do you, Boo.”
Fuck.
Why couldn’t Zander have left him with someone quiet?
Hayes drew his phone out and sat. He sent a message to Donovan and Kent, telling them about Devi.
Kent: I’m coming out.
Hayes : No need at the moment. Unless it’s to rein Zander in.
Kent: I’ve only been trying to do that for a decade. I’m coming to help you.
Hayes didn’t have the energy to argue.
“Is there someone we need to call? About Devi?” Honey asked. “Will someone be expecting her today?”
He groaned. “She works at the local café. Not sure what time she starts, but her boss is an asshole.”
“I’ll find the phone number. I’ll call and leave a message. Anyone else?”
“She has another job. She’s probably scheduled on tonight. Be harder to find Mac’s details. Elk Horn Tavern.”
“I’ll figure it out.”
Hayes leaned his head forward into his hands as he placed his elbows against his thighs.
Please let her be all right.
Please, God.
You took May from me, if you take Devi too . . . I might not survive.
We’re only friends.
Denial used to be easier than this.
“How is she? Have you heard anything?”
Hayes looked up in shock as Mac rushed into the room. His hair was up on end and he had his T-shirt on backward.
“Mac?” he asked. “What are you doing here?”
“What am I doing here? I came to check on Devi, of course. Some woman named Honey called and said that Devi had been attacked in a home invasion. What the fuck happened? Where was Derick?”
“You know him? Her father?”
Mac ran his hand over his face. “For God’s sake, man. Tell me she’s all right.”
“I don’t know yet,” he said in a raw voice. “I’m still waiting to hear.”
The door to the waiting room slammed open and Silla rushed in. Her hair was a rat’s nest and her eye makeup was smeared. She was wearing two different shoes and carrying a basketball. She was also wearing pajama bottoms with paddles on them.
“What’s going on? What happened to Devi?”
“She was attacked. Home invasion,” Mac replied.
“Well, how is she?” Silla demanded
“I don’t know, Silla,” Mac said.
“Like I was saying, I’m waiting to hear?”
The door opened again and an older woman joined them. She was the most composed out of all of them, but fear filled her face as she stared at them.
“Have you heard how she is? A home invasion? What is the world coming to? And why would they break into that old trailer? Not like that fool, Derick had anything nice. If he had he would have sold it for booze. I’m Michelle. Devi does her pottery at my studio.”
“Her pottery?” he asked.
“She hasn’t told you about her pottery?” she demanded. Then she turned to Mac. “I thought you said he was keen on her.”
“I thought he was. Maybe they haven’t talked about the pottery yet. You know Devi keeps that quiet so Derick doesn’t learn of it.”
“Okay, what?” he asked.
“Devi is very talented,” the older woman said. “She makes the most beautiful vases and bowls. Stunning. She has a showing at a gallery in six weeks. I’ve started boxing everything. Just tell me, is she all right?”
They all stared at him. “She’s in surgery. I’m waiting to find out.”
The door opened again.
Lord, save him.
But this time, a doctor stepped inside. He glanced around tiredly. “Is someone here for Devi Dawson?”
“I am,” Hayes said.
“And me,” Silla added.
“Us too,” Mac said, gesturing to himself and Michelle.
The doctor eyed them all, his gaze lingering over Silla. “Are any of you related to her?”
“I’m her father,” Mac said.
“And I’m her aunt,” Michelle added.
“Sister,” Silla said without hesitation.
Dear Lord. If he didn’t know them, he’d actually believe what they were saying.
They were all insane.
“And you?” the doctor asked him.
“Fiancé.”
“There was no sign of a ring,” the doctor said. “I suppose the intruders might have taken it.”
“Bastards,” Silla spat out. “I’ve seen the ring. It was a whopper of a diamond. I bet that was the reason they attacked her. Not saying it was your fault, Hayes.”
“Right.” Except he still felt like it was. Not because of some pretend ring.
He’d left her.
Just like he’d left May.
“Just tell us how she is,” Michelle begged. “Is she going to be all right?”
The surgeon nodded. “None of her injuries were life-threatening. She did lose quite a bit of blood, but thankfully she’s a common blood type. Although I would encourage you all to donate while you’re here.”
“Not me,” Silla said. “I faint at the sight of blood. Just my own, though. It’s the darnedest thing.”
“Uh, right. Well, she’s likely to wake up feeling pretty awful from the blood loss and the general anaesthetic. As well as her arm.” He blew out a small breath. “The cut wasn’t that deep, but it was long. Thankfully, it didn’t hit any arteries or she might not have been so lucky.”
Jesus. Fuck.
“She’s going to be in some pain from for a while. And there was a lot of tendon and ligament damage. We repaired it as much as we could. But the recovery will be quite long and painful. Lots of rehabilitation.”
“Oh no,” Michelle said, taking a seat. “She’s a potter. She makes beautiful pottery. I don’t know how she’ll do that with one arm.”
“I’m hopeful that with proper rehabilitation eventually she might gain most of her movement back,” the surgeon said. “But there’s no guarantees, unfortunately.”
“But she’s going to be all right?” Hayes asked. That was the most important thing. He’d find her the best physical therapists, a new surgeon, whatever he had to. As long as she was alive.
“Physically, she will recover. But an attack like this could adversely affect her mental health. Especially with the cut to her face.”
“There’s a cut on her face?” Silla asked. “How bad is it? Will it scar?”
“It will likely scar. I did my best to stitch it back together in a way to minimize scarring. However, I’m not a plastic surgeon.”
“Plastic surgery could take care of that, right?” Mac asked. “Gonna cost a bomb, though.”
“Yes, it would. But it would be worth the cost for her self-esteem. A young girl like that shouldn’t be left with scars from an attack like this. I’m going to go write up my notes. If there are no other questions?”
“Just when can I see her?” Hayes asked.
“She’s in recovery. A nurse will come get you soon. But it is one at a time at the moment so I suggest the rest of you go home and shower. Get some food. Take it in shifts. She’ll need to be here a few days, at least.” He eyed Silla again. “Ah, I feel like I should ask about the basketball.”
“Huh? Oh!” Silla went red. “Didn’t realize I was holding this. Sorry. I sleep with it.”
The doctor blinked. “Um, right.” He still looked bewildered as he left.
Hayes turned to the rest of them. “I’m going in. You should all go home.”
Mac shook his head and sat. Michelle sat next to him. Silla ran her fingers through her hair. “I’ll get us coffee and food and put Basket in my car.”
Basket was the name of the ball? He could ask . . . but he didn’t really want to know.
“Well, I’m going to go and get Kent and Liam from the airport,” Honey said.
Shit. He hadn’t even noticed her entering the waiting room. “Why he needed to fly out here, I have no idea. We have this covered.”
Hayes didn’t care who was here or what they were doing. All he cared about was making sure that Devi was all right.